Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction ❯ End Game ❯ The Final Point ( Chapter 3 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
End Game
Chapter 3: The Final Point
By: Lord Archive
Ranma 1/2 belongs to Rumiko Takahashi and is used without consent nor intent of profit. All rights reserved.
This is set in the manga time line. Anime only events do not apply.
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Textbooks littered the dining room table as Ranma and Akane worked on a project together. Nodoka was in the backyard, hanging laundry on a clothesline.
"You do realize that you're both incredibly stupid," Nabiki taunted.
Ranma glared at her. "Just because we can't figure out your price?"
Nabiki wagged her finger. "Because if you thought about it, you had the answer to Ukyou the entire time."
"What do you mean?" Akane asked quizzically.
"What did Ranma gamble away to the Gambler King?" Nabiki presented.
"The dojo," Akane replied.
"Correct. OUR dojo," Nabiki stressed. "Which meant that Ranma knew of the engagement when he was little. Might not have known what it meant, but he did accept the dowry. It was likely talk of the engagement that got little Ukyou to think being about being engaged to Ranma herself."
"And what does that have to do with it, Pop still stole her dowry," Ranma pointed out.
Akane slapped herself on her forehead. "No he didn't. Ukyou gambled it off as well. Your father stole the Gambler King's yatai. Why didn't I see this before?"
Nodoka frowned as she approached them. "Regardless of proper ownership, Genma did cause damage to the Kuonji family. A debt is owed."
"And what of the debt they owe for interfering in family matters and presenting a false dowry?" Nabiki returned. "There was knowledge of an existing engagement, yet Ukyou was still whored off. Neither side entered the agreement on proper grounds."
Nodoka frowned. "Did Kuonji-san know of the engagement to a Tendo daughter?"
"Hard to say, considering the sources we have," Nabiki chided. "However, the true instigator likely did know and tried to take Ranma for herself."
Nodoka gave a shallow nod. "You do have a point. Though getting the girl to see reason may be an issue." She cocked her head. "Perhaps she should be allowed to be Ranma's mistress, in case Akane fails to produce a proper heir."
"Good luck with that." Nabiki laughed as she left the room.
Akane glared at Ranma. "No way am I allowing that!" She wasn't really surprised at Nodoka's suggestion, it would be 'manly' and many still considered having a mistress as being acceptable. She was not one of them!
"I told you before, one pervert is enough," Ranma shot back at her.
Nodoka frowned at Akane, but didn't press the issue.
"Wasn't that the necklace you gave your wife?" Genma asked as he entered the room with Soun.
The Tendo patriarch nodded. "Though I wonder why Nabiki has it. My dear wife gave it to Kasumi."
"I remember when you got it. You had missed a date with her thanks to the master," Genma growled.
"Ah, yes. She wouldn't listen to me until after I told her that I loved her," Soun recalled tearfully.
Nodoka smiled. "That certainly was her favorite necklace. If I recall correctly, that was the night Kasumi was conceived."
Soun sighed happily. "Best five-hundred yen I ever spent."
Akane was at first sickened at the idea her mother's love was apparently worth only a single coin in cheap jewelry. Then was upset to realize she hadn't even gotten that much out of her secret husband.
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Akane didn't know if she wanted to laugh or commit murder. Once again Kudo had latched onto Ranma, and her secret husband looked like a dog chasing his tail in his attempts to yank the pervert off himself. As comical as it looked, their school loomed before them and the spectacle was increasingly becoming embarrassing.
Several girls were glaring death at Ranma, with one of them commenting, "He's starting to take the good looking guys now!"
"What foulness is this?!" Kuno bellowed.
Ranma turned to look at Akane. "Some help getting this fucking pervert off me?"
"What unmanly demon would latch himself to that vile cur?" Kuno questioned. "At least he has an eye for women, but thou are unworthy of my sight."
"I am more than man enough for you." Kudo slid off Ranma and smiled suavely. "You do know the greatest expression of love is between men."
Kuno pulled out his bokken. "That was between master and servant, and few servants truly experienced love rather they felt their lord's inhuman lust."
"Perhaps I should enlighten you." Kudo grinned deviously.
Several girls cheered for Kudo.
"My family knows more of the horror you suggest," Kuno growled.
Kudo pulled out two paper mache bombs. "I'll show you who is the master with what the great oni, Happousai, has taught me."
As one the gathered girls turned to Kuno. "Kill him."
The battle commenced. Kudo slithered away from Kuno's strikes, while the samurai wannabe shrugged off the attacks that struck him.
"What's going on here?" Ukyou wondered.
"Kuno found someone he hates more than Ranma," Akane replied with a touch of mirth. "Kudo likes Ranma more as a guy than as a girl."
Ukyou made a face. "Surprised Ranma hasn't killed him yet."
"He's Happousai's newest student," Akane commented. "And just as slippery."
Ukyou nodded as she watched Kudo limbo under Kuno's angry strikes. "He knows that Ranma is really a guy and likes girls, right?"
"Kudo is his master's student. If Kuno losses, he may just get some samurai love," Akane replied dryly.
Ukyou's eyes crossed.
"Don't think Kuno has anything to worry about yet," Ranma noted. "Kudo is lacking in power and isn't use to fighting. He's starting to tire out."
The girls nodded, watching as Kuno nicked his foe's shoulder, sending the young man tumbling away.
Kudo held his shoulder defensively. "You've got some skill. I see I must train more under the master."
"No amount of training will allow you to defeat me," Kuno boasted. He turned and strode into the school.
"I'll be happier when the school year is over and he's off to college," Ranma grumbled.
The girls nodded in agreement.
Akane glanced over at her friend and rival. "Nabiki mentioned something interesting that I hadn't realized."
"Oh?" Ukyou wondered.
"That you technically don't have a legitimate claim as Ranma's fiance. You had gambled off your dowry to the Gambler King and Ranma had already accepted my dowry of the dojo at that time when he gambled it off," Akane said quickly to avoid Ukyou cutting her off.
"In order for me to gamble it away, it has to be my dowry, Sugar. I would have to get married in order to pay that debt off," Ukyou pointed out. "Besides, there's no way you and Ranchan would be happy with each other, always arguing. With me, you have a means of getting out of your forced engagement."
Akane glared as Ukyou smugly walked off.
"Yeah, I'd say that tidbit was worth the five-hundred yen," Ranma groused.
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Akane was amazed at the effects of Bakusai Tenketsu had on its user. After today's training, she should've been a walking bruise, yet she walked normally into her family's main room.
Nabiki giggled dementedly as she played with an impressive pile of gold, silver and gems. "Shampoo has challenged you to a fight Saturday at two."
Akane glared angrily. "You told her?! You sold me out?!"
"A girl has to make money somehow," Nabiki shot back smugly. "Besides, I didn't TELL her anything, I confirmed her suspicions. She actually doesn't know the marriage has been consummated."
Akane flushed deep red. "NABIKI?!"
"If she did know, I suspect she would've forgone the challenge and hunted you down," Nabiki added.
"And who said I'm not a virgin?" Akane asked heatedly.
"Pictures are worth a thousand words, and one with Ranma carrying you into a love motel would certainly be worth a lot of yen." Nabiki frowned. "Unfortunately the owner of that photo wants too much for it."
Akane growled angrily, wondering who else knew. But there was another pressing concern. "Am I ready to fight Shampoo?"
"Doubtful." Ranma swept through the room.
Nabiki blinked as everything before her had vanished. "Hey, what did you do Saotome?"
"If Akane gets hurt, her medical bills would have to be paid somehow," Ranma snarled. "If the worst happens, you're next to be married."
Nabiki's eyes widen. "Shampoo is no killer and there's always Kasumi."
"I wouldn't put her through the shit in my life," Ranma shot back.
"Gee, don't you feel honored," Nabiki shot at Akane. "And that's still my money."
"Belongs to the family," Ranma chided. "You'll get whatever isn't used to pay her medical bills."
"You can't do that," Nabiki hissed.
"My house, my rules," Ranma shot back smugly.
"It's Daddy's..." Nabiki's face dropped. "Oh, shit."
Ranma nodded. "Akane's dowry."
Akane shook her head in amusement at her husband putting Nabiki in her place.
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Having spent the past half-hour deciding on the best outfit to wear that was both flexible enough to fight in and yet still look casual, Akane walked in Ukyou's restaurant expecting a fight. With Shampoo knowing of the legal marriage, her friend and rival deserved to know as well. And Akane expected Ukyou would not take kindly to this information. Genma was nearby as Ukyou would serve as a warm-up to fighting Shampoo in a few days.
"Hey, Sugar, what brings you here today?" Ukyou greeted warmly.
Akane shifted uneasily. "Hi, um, I think we should talk..."
"Want some pointers for Shampoo's challenge?" Ukyou offered.
"Er, well it's kind of about that challenge and why I have to fight her," Akane nervously fretted.
"Oh?" Ukyou wondered.
Akane nodded. "You do know that a wedding ceremony, by itself, doesn't mean anything legally. That to be married you must file a marriage application."
Ukyou shrugged. "It's not like Ranma would ever sign one."
"Actually..." Akane swallowed. "He did."
Ukyou scowled darkly. "He was tricked into signing it. Bribed with the water from spring of drowned man?"
Akane coughed. "That was more why I signed it. He never read what they had him sign, saying it was paperwork to deal with him going to China."
"Figures." Ukyou shook her head. "If only I thought of tricking him like that. This mess would be over already."
Akane looked confused at the girl. "You realize that I am married to Ranma."
"Yeah, but it's only a paper marriage. It doesn't mean anything," Ukyou returned.
Akane turned away and blushed. "Ah... Ranma and I have... you know..."
Ukyou's glare promised death. "Couldn't pass up the chance to ride the horse, eh?"
Akane withered under the gaze. "I wouldn't call him a 'horse' that way. He wasn't wild nor big. Kind of disappointing actually."
Ukyou let out a hollow laugh. "What do you expect from a forced marriage." She then busied herself by angrily stirring something. "You do need to have an heir to fulfill your family obligation," she spat. "Still, there's not much chance of it lasting. You'll get sick of the arguments and get divorced before long."
"I hope not," Akane muttered.
Ukyou put her hand on her rival's. "I know you wanted a marriage to last a lifetime. But if all the passion is in yelling at each other, is it really a marriage?"
Akane wasn't sure if the girl was trying to be comforting or was trying to break her wrist. "There is more passion than just the fighting. I honestly do want to make it work."
"Takes two to tango, and if Ranma doesn't work at it, what hope is there?" Ukyou growled. "If you don't mind, I've got work to attend to."
Akane nodded slowly and moved to walk out of the restaurant.
"Why'd she have to tell me right when I've got a hundred thousand yen catering order to put together," Ukyou hissed under her breath.
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"Heard you went to see Ucchan," Ranma stated harshly.
Akane flinched. "She deserved to know the truth and I could've used her as a warm-up fight."
"So you thought you'd fight her in her home turf?" Ranma growled. "Shampoo isn't stupid enough to try that. She's bound to have that place rigged in case someone decided to attack her."
Akane grimaced.
"What did happen?" Ranma wondered.
"Ukyou fully expects that once I'm pregnant you'll drop me and run off with her," Akane remarked bitterly. "That it's only obligation behind our marriage. That we'll never stay together with all our fighting."
"The fighting is half the fun," Ranma remarked.
"And making up is the other half." Akane blushed.
"Pervert," Ranma playfully growled.
"Hey! Who's the pervert?" Akane yelled.
"I'd say the one who likes cock and cunt," Ranma teased.
Akane was beet red, mostly as their parents were now behind Ranma staring at her. "Take that back!"
"Then don't bring in the water!" Ranma stuck his tongue and ran away.
Akane immediately ran after him.
Nabiki stepped out from where she was hiding, pressing stop on her tape recorder. "Weirdest foreplay ever."
Soun stared in the direction the young couple had run off to. "But they're not married yet."
Nabiki raised an eyebrow. "You filed the paperwork yourself. They are legally married. Akane even has the marriage certificate in her room."
"But the ceremony?" Soun wondered.
"Meant jack shit," Nabiki chided. "Why do you think I invited everyone? It was already too late for them to do anything."
Nodoka frowned. "It only delayed in announcing they're together."
"And that comes to an end when she faces Shampoo this weekend," Genma noted morbidly.
Nabiki frowned. "What are Akane's chances?"
"Not good. Shampoo knows Akane has been training, and set the challenge to give herself time to freshen and sharpen her own skills." Genma shook his head. "At least Ranma is helping her training, even now running through the city will help her speed and flexibility."
"The master certainly made sure we got that sort of training, though more as the one being chased than being the chaser." Soun shuddered, and then once again gazed in the direction his daughter had run off to. "My baby is all grown up!"
"Yes. Yes." Nabiki turned around. "You'll be a grandpa before you know it."
"Assuming Shampoo doesn't kill her," Genma muttered.
"My baby is going to die!" Soun wailed.
Nodoka smacked her husband's arm.
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"And now for the event over a year in the making: Shampoo verses Saotome Akane!" Nabiki announced. "That's right folks, _Saotome_ Akane. The explosive wedding ceremony didn't mean a thing as Ranma and Akane were already legally married. And unless you've been under a rock, the reason for this fight is self-explanatory."
Shampoo pointed at her foe. "I will not let you steal what is mine."
"Ranma was never yours to begin with," Akane shot back.
"Winner gets to keep Ranma, loser gets lovely funeral," Shampoo spoke her terms.
Akane glared. "Ranma isn't a piece of meat to be fought over. He's not going to marry you, ever."
"We'll see about that after he finds out what a real martial artist is like in bed," Shampoo gloated. "I've got more to offer."
"He doesn't want what a glass of water gives him," Akane returned smugly. "You've got nothing he wants."
"I'll show him he's got more with me than a beautiful wife instead of a flat-chested gorilla." Shampoo posed to highlight her endowments. "I'll give him more than an old, busted up dojo with no students, but an entire village of warriors eager to learn to fight. Thousands of years of martial arts lore and techniques that he can learn. He would really be the greatest fighter of all time. What can you teach him? How to change diapers and make a budget? And he'd have a wife who can cook, which you'll never be good at. My great-grandmother would teach him many great things. With you, he gets a father-in-law who is a human water faucet, one sister whose head isn't home even though she never leaves the house, and another sister who would sell her mother's ashes for a hundred yen."
Akane's angry glare drilled holes through Shampoo.
Nabiki's eye went wide.
"Not that your mother was worth much, dying before she could properly raise you." Shampoo shrugged dismissively. "Or was it that she was worthless for what she did teach you?"
"Fuck," Ranma moaned.
"Kill that bitch!" Nabiki screeched.
Akane roared in anger, and ran with fist raised, ready to strike despite Ranma's insistence that she should be reactive to the Amazon's attacks and not go full on offensive.
Shampoo smirked as she leapfrogged over her opponent, her fingers pressing down onto Akane's scalp.
Akane couldn't see, couldn't think. All there was before her was a cat to be skinned alive. Punch after punch, kick after kick only met open air. It was only when Shampoo had the audacity to fake a yawn that Akane connected with a punch, and that forced the Amazon's to hastily block the attack with her forearm.
Again Shampoo leapt over Akane, her fingers pressing down on the Japanese girl's head. Once again the amazon retreated from Akane's attacks in a straight line.
"Watch what she's doing, moron!" Ranma yelled. "She's about to pull a move on you!"
"You saw what Shampoo did," Cologne noted. She shook her head slightly. "Your wife can't think straight."
Shampoo rocketed both her hands toward Akane as if to push her back like a sumo-wrestler. Only Akane didn't just fall back a step, she rocketed away flying through a metal fence and crashing into the school.
"See? You're just a silly girl who is no match for me," Shampoo gloated. "I know of many more techniques like that. Best to come home, husband, so I can teach you."
A roar bellowed from the school.
"I warned you about using those pressure points on someone with anger management issues," Cologne chastised.
An explosion created a new hole in the school and a thunderous crash echoed as a crater formed in the school field. Akane panted angrily, her feral eyes locked on her opponent.
Shampoo was once again on the defensive, yet because of Akane's anger it was a simple matter of evading the attacks. The field, however, would seriously need to be replaced.
"You have the right to interfere," Cologne mentioned. "You just can't win the fight for Akane."
Ranma seemed to vanish and appear behind his wife. His hands blurred and Akane stumbled forward.
Shampoo scowled, yet took the opportunity to kick the side of her opponent's head. "You shouldn't interfere. You'll be happier with me."
"I seriously doubt that," Ranma snapped at her.
Shampoo turned to face her opponent only to find that Akane had already spun to her feet and launched her own kick right between the Amazon's legs. Whoever said that doesn't work on girls never knew the sudden pain of attempted rape by shoe.
Now the battle was fully joined, Akane and Shampoo traded punches and kicks. Even without resorting to special techniques, Shampoo still gave more than she received. If not for Bakusai Tenketsu, Akane would've already fallen to Shampoo. A sickening crack echoed, announcing that Akane's left arm broke blocking Shampoo's deadly kick. The Amazon did not relent and Akane didn't yield. Another blow to the chest probably cracked a few ribs.
Akane stumbled back and fell onto her back. She panted as Shampoo loomed above her.
"Last chance. Give Ranma to me," Shampoo demanded.
"Never," Akane hissed through her pain.
"Your funeral." Shampoo raised her arm to strike but her fist failed to moved forward as a wooden walking staff tapped her arm. "Great-grandmother?!"
"Land that blow and there would be a funeral... yours." Cologne pointed at Ranma who was seething in anger yet wasn't moving. "I declare this a draw, Akane may not be able to defeat you, but you won't win the prize either. Had I not restrained Ranma, he might've taken your head off when you broke her arm."
Shampoo stared at her beloved with wide, frightened eyes. She had been in Jusendo and knew very well what happened to Saffron. And now the one she loved was glaring through her with murderous intent. "Ranma..."
"Dear, you must accept that it was not meant to be. Ranma doesn't love you the way you want," Cologne told her sadly.
"But the law? If I return now..." Shampoo trailed off.
"As your teacher I can take your punishment onto myself. Your failure shall be my own." Cologne sighed dramatically. "I hereby banish myself from the village, never to return or face death."
"But great-grandmother... you would do that for me?" Shampoo couldn't believe what she was hearing.
"Yes, Dear. Now renounce your claim, else Ranma may yet unleash his ire on you," Cologne told her.
Shampoo frowned as she walked up to the still frozen Ranma. "I honestly do love you. It wasn't about the law. If you ever grow tired of that violent girl, I will welcome you." She leaned forward and kissed him soundly. She then kneed him in the balls. "You are not my husband. Good-bye, beloved." She ran away crying.
Cologne poked Ranma, releasing him from her restraining pressure points. He immediately fought the pain Shampoo had inflicted on him to move to Akane's side.
"Are you okay?" Ranma asked desperately.
"A few broken bones. I'll be fine," Akane wheezed. She turned her head. "Is it really over?"
"Shampoo's claim has been broken," Cologne assured her.
"What happens now?" Akane wondered.
"Shampoo can go home, or stay here. Mousse would follow her." Cologne smirked. "As for me, I must endure the shame of remaining here. This fight actually took longer than expected. I'm missing my favorite television show. I need to find out who is the father of Michiko's baby."
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Akane wasn't pleased with the way Ranma stayed ahead of her scouting for trouble. Three cracked ribs and a broken arm didn't make her an invalid. She couldn't even 'celebrate' her 'draw' because Ranma was afraid he'd hurt her.
"What is this I hear that you have forced the beauteous Tendo Akane to forcibly marry thee and thrust your horrid name on her," Kuno bellowed.
"Everything, including the _thrusting_ was her idea," Ranma taunted.
Akane turned beet red, not missing the double meaning of her husband's statement. "Ranma?!" She swung her plaster encased arm at him.
"What the hell are you doing?!" Ranma caught the arm, gently slowly it down. "Are you trying to hurt yourself more?"
"Then don't even insinuate anything about _that_!" Akane shot at him.
"Foul cur, you are not a man for allowing her to be hurt at the hands of one of your concubines," Kuno intoned angrily.
"You try stopping her from fighting and see where that gets you," Ranma shot back.
"It was my battle to fight," Akane added.
"To save Tendo Akane from her horrid marriage, I will smite thee!" Kuno took a step forward, bokken poised to strike.
Ranma grabbed the weapon and yanked it from Kuno's hands. "Don't you dare point that near Akane." He then broke it over his upperclassman's head.
Kuno fell bonelessly to the ground.
Principal Kuno suddenly popped out of a potted plant and didn't give his son a second look. "Ah, you two have been baaaaaad students. Inappropriate behavior and damages to the school property."
"Send the bill to Nabiki, and we will work out a method of repaying it," Ranma told him seriously. "And hell would freeze over before she would do anything _inappropriate_ here."
"Ranma!" Akane cried out hitting him with her good right arm, sending him flying.
Ranma quickly leapt to his feet and rubbed where she hit him. "Geez, you really do hit like a truck now."
Ukyou strode up to him. "Just hurry up and knock her up, then you won't have to deal with her anymore."
Ranma didn't bother to give her a reply.
"Hey, handsome, you okay?" Kudo questioned as Kuno began to wake up.
The upperclassman took one look at the young man hovering over him, screamed and ran away.
Kudo pranced after him. "Come back, my little samurai stud muffin of love."
"Nihao!" Shampoo chirped. "Delivery for Gosunkugi?"
"Thought you were going home," Akane groused.
"Got a letter from home... actually from Hong Kong. Father has moved there with most of the village." Shampoo shrugged. "The younger members of the village have been moving away for years. Elders have decided it was time to move on. Village is now for sale, if you want it."
"What would I want a backwater village for?" Akane wondered.
Shampoo ignored her as she looked at her 'ex-husband.' "Staying here will be better for us. If you get tired of your wife, come to me and I'll show you what a real woman can do." She then pranced away to finish her delivery to the gloomy boy who had placed the order.
Ranma shook his head. "We're married, but nothing has really changed, has it?"
"Nope, nothing has changed," Akane commented as she watched Mousse attack Kudo thinking he was Ranma chasing after Shampoo.
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Author's Notes:
This is it for the story. I wrote what I wanted to for it. Yes, I resolved a few points of Ranma 1/2, namely Kodachi, who had zero chance of winning Ranma, and Ryouga, who was already being written as a non-issue toward the end of the manga. Yes, I also left a few things unresolved, namely Ukyou as she wasn't going to quietly walk away. Ukyou not accepting the situation was actually part of the point. All to often with stories dealing with 'Ranma and Akane getting married,' all the relationship issues are dealt with and everyone lives 'happily ever after.' That realistically wasn't going to happen and was likely why Rumiko Takahashi ended the series with a failed wedding, because there was no way to resolve all the issues reasonably. As such, following the issues of the manga, I didn't resolve everything here either and had no plans to do so. Just because Ranma and Akane are fully married, it doesn't mean their problems magically go away.
As for Akane getting smacked down by Shampoo despite being seriously trained, let's be realistic. At the start of Ranma 1/2 Akane's martial arts abilities were within the realms of human ability. No special moves, no ultimate chi attacks, nothing that a real person couldn't learn. At the same time, Shampoo was already able to punch holes through walls and was the best fighter of her generation in a village filled ancient martial arts practices and special moves. The only way Akane could ever hope to be Shampoo's equal would either require magical assistance, like the Battle Douji, or for Shampoo to be unable to train for a significant period of time to allow Akane to close the gap between them.
Chapter 3: The Final Point
By: Lord Archive
Ranma 1/2 belongs to Rumiko Takahashi and is used without consent nor intent of profit. All rights reserved.
This is set in the manga time line. Anime only events do not apply.
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Textbooks littered the dining room table as Ranma and Akane worked on a project together. Nodoka was in the backyard, hanging laundry on a clothesline.
"You do realize that you're both incredibly stupid," Nabiki taunted.
Ranma glared at her. "Just because we can't figure out your price?"
Nabiki wagged her finger. "Because if you thought about it, you had the answer to Ukyou the entire time."
"What do you mean?" Akane asked quizzically.
"What did Ranma gamble away to the Gambler King?" Nabiki presented.
"The dojo," Akane replied.
"Correct. OUR dojo," Nabiki stressed. "Which meant that Ranma knew of the engagement when he was little. Might not have known what it meant, but he did accept the dowry. It was likely talk of the engagement that got little Ukyou to think being about being engaged to Ranma herself."
"And what does that have to do with it, Pop still stole her dowry," Ranma pointed out.
Akane slapped herself on her forehead. "No he didn't. Ukyou gambled it off as well. Your father stole the Gambler King's yatai. Why didn't I see this before?"
Nodoka frowned as she approached them. "Regardless of proper ownership, Genma did cause damage to the Kuonji family. A debt is owed."
"And what of the debt they owe for interfering in family matters and presenting a false dowry?" Nabiki returned. "There was knowledge of an existing engagement, yet Ukyou was still whored off. Neither side entered the agreement on proper grounds."
Nodoka frowned. "Did Kuonji-san know of the engagement to a Tendo daughter?"
"Hard to say, considering the sources we have," Nabiki chided. "However, the true instigator likely did know and tried to take Ranma for herself."
Nodoka gave a shallow nod. "You do have a point. Though getting the girl to see reason may be an issue." She cocked her head. "Perhaps she should be allowed to be Ranma's mistress, in case Akane fails to produce a proper heir."
"Good luck with that." Nabiki laughed as she left the room.
Akane glared at Ranma. "No way am I allowing that!" She wasn't really surprised at Nodoka's suggestion, it would be 'manly' and many still considered having a mistress as being acceptable. She was not one of them!
"I told you before, one pervert is enough," Ranma shot back at her.
Nodoka frowned at Akane, but didn't press the issue.
"Wasn't that the necklace you gave your wife?" Genma asked as he entered the room with Soun.
The Tendo patriarch nodded. "Though I wonder why Nabiki has it. My dear wife gave it to Kasumi."
"I remember when you got it. You had missed a date with her thanks to the master," Genma growled.
"Ah, yes. She wouldn't listen to me until after I told her that I loved her," Soun recalled tearfully.
Nodoka smiled. "That certainly was her favorite necklace. If I recall correctly, that was the night Kasumi was conceived."
Soun sighed happily. "Best five-hundred yen I ever spent."
Akane was at first sickened at the idea her mother's love was apparently worth only a single coin in cheap jewelry. Then was upset to realize she hadn't even gotten that much out of her secret husband.
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Akane didn't know if she wanted to laugh or commit murder. Once again Kudo had latched onto Ranma, and her secret husband looked like a dog chasing his tail in his attempts to yank the pervert off himself. As comical as it looked, their school loomed before them and the spectacle was increasingly becoming embarrassing.
Several girls were glaring death at Ranma, with one of them commenting, "He's starting to take the good looking guys now!"
"What foulness is this?!" Kuno bellowed.
Ranma turned to look at Akane. "Some help getting this fucking pervert off me?"
"What unmanly demon would latch himself to that vile cur?" Kuno questioned. "At least he has an eye for women, but thou are unworthy of my sight."
"I am more than man enough for you." Kudo slid off Ranma and smiled suavely. "You do know the greatest expression of love is between men."
Kuno pulled out his bokken. "That was between master and servant, and few servants truly experienced love rather they felt their lord's inhuman lust."
"Perhaps I should enlighten you." Kudo grinned deviously.
Several girls cheered for Kudo.
"My family knows more of the horror you suggest," Kuno growled.
Kudo pulled out two paper mache bombs. "I'll show you who is the master with what the great oni, Happousai, has taught me."
As one the gathered girls turned to Kuno. "Kill him."
The battle commenced. Kudo slithered away from Kuno's strikes, while the samurai wannabe shrugged off the attacks that struck him.
"What's going on here?" Ukyou wondered.
"Kuno found someone he hates more than Ranma," Akane replied with a touch of mirth. "Kudo likes Ranma more as a guy than as a girl."
Ukyou made a face. "Surprised Ranma hasn't killed him yet."
"He's Happousai's newest student," Akane commented. "And just as slippery."
Ukyou nodded as she watched Kudo limbo under Kuno's angry strikes. "He knows that Ranma is really a guy and likes girls, right?"
"Kudo is his master's student. If Kuno losses, he may just get some samurai love," Akane replied dryly.
Ukyou's eyes crossed.
"Don't think Kuno has anything to worry about yet," Ranma noted. "Kudo is lacking in power and isn't use to fighting. He's starting to tire out."
The girls nodded, watching as Kuno nicked his foe's shoulder, sending the young man tumbling away.
Kudo held his shoulder defensively. "You've got some skill. I see I must train more under the master."
"No amount of training will allow you to defeat me," Kuno boasted. He turned and strode into the school.
"I'll be happier when the school year is over and he's off to college," Ranma grumbled.
The girls nodded in agreement.
Akane glanced over at her friend and rival. "Nabiki mentioned something interesting that I hadn't realized."
"Oh?" Ukyou wondered.
"That you technically don't have a legitimate claim as Ranma's fiance. You had gambled off your dowry to the Gambler King and Ranma had already accepted my dowry of the dojo at that time when he gambled it off," Akane said quickly to avoid Ukyou cutting her off.
"In order for me to gamble it away, it has to be my dowry, Sugar. I would have to get married in order to pay that debt off," Ukyou pointed out. "Besides, there's no way you and Ranchan would be happy with each other, always arguing. With me, you have a means of getting out of your forced engagement."
Akane glared as Ukyou smugly walked off.
"Yeah, I'd say that tidbit was worth the five-hundred yen," Ranma groused.
--------------------
Akane was amazed at the effects of Bakusai Tenketsu had on its user. After today's training, she should've been a walking bruise, yet she walked normally into her family's main room.
Nabiki giggled dementedly as she played with an impressive pile of gold, silver and gems. "Shampoo has challenged you to a fight Saturday at two."
Akane glared angrily. "You told her?! You sold me out?!"
"A girl has to make money somehow," Nabiki shot back smugly. "Besides, I didn't TELL her anything, I confirmed her suspicions. She actually doesn't know the marriage has been consummated."
Akane flushed deep red. "NABIKI?!"
"If she did know, I suspect she would've forgone the challenge and hunted you down," Nabiki added.
"And who said I'm not a virgin?" Akane asked heatedly.
"Pictures are worth a thousand words, and one with Ranma carrying you into a love motel would certainly be worth a lot of yen." Nabiki frowned. "Unfortunately the owner of that photo wants too much for it."
Akane growled angrily, wondering who else knew. But there was another pressing concern. "Am I ready to fight Shampoo?"
"Doubtful." Ranma swept through the room.
Nabiki blinked as everything before her had vanished. "Hey, what did you do Saotome?"
"If Akane gets hurt, her medical bills would have to be paid somehow," Ranma snarled. "If the worst happens, you're next to be married."
Nabiki's eyes widen. "Shampoo is no killer and there's always Kasumi."
"I wouldn't put her through the shit in my life," Ranma shot back.
"Gee, don't you feel honored," Nabiki shot at Akane. "And that's still my money."
"Belongs to the family," Ranma chided. "You'll get whatever isn't used to pay her medical bills."
"You can't do that," Nabiki hissed.
"My house, my rules," Ranma shot back smugly.
"It's Daddy's..." Nabiki's face dropped. "Oh, shit."
Ranma nodded. "Akane's dowry."
Akane shook her head in amusement at her husband putting Nabiki in her place.
--------------------
Having spent the past half-hour deciding on the best outfit to wear that was both flexible enough to fight in and yet still look casual, Akane walked in Ukyou's restaurant expecting a fight. With Shampoo knowing of the legal marriage, her friend and rival deserved to know as well. And Akane expected Ukyou would not take kindly to this information. Genma was nearby as Ukyou would serve as a warm-up to fighting Shampoo in a few days.
"Hey, Sugar, what brings you here today?" Ukyou greeted warmly.
Akane shifted uneasily. "Hi, um, I think we should talk..."
"Want some pointers for Shampoo's challenge?" Ukyou offered.
"Er, well it's kind of about that challenge and why I have to fight her," Akane nervously fretted.
"Oh?" Ukyou wondered.
Akane nodded. "You do know that a wedding ceremony, by itself, doesn't mean anything legally. That to be married you must file a marriage application."
Ukyou shrugged. "It's not like Ranma would ever sign one."
"Actually..." Akane swallowed. "He did."
Ukyou scowled darkly. "He was tricked into signing it. Bribed with the water from spring of drowned man?"
Akane coughed. "That was more why I signed it. He never read what they had him sign, saying it was paperwork to deal with him going to China."
"Figures." Ukyou shook her head. "If only I thought of tricking him like that. This mess would be over already."
Akane looked confused at the girl. "You realize that I am married to Ranma."
"Yeah, but it's only a paper marriage. It doesn't mean anything," Ukyou returned.
Akane turned away and blushed. "Ah... Ranma and I have... you know..."
Ukyou's glare promised death. "Couldn't pass up the chance to ride the horse, eh?"
Akane withered under the gaze. "I wouldn't call him a 'horse' that way. He wasn't wild nor big. Kind of disappointing actually."
Ukyou let out a hollow laugh. "What do you expect from a forced marriage." She then busied herself by angrily stirring something. "You do need to have an heir to fulfill your family obligation," she spat. "Still, there's not much chance of it lasting. You'll get sick of the arguments and get divorced before long."
"I hope not," Akane muttered.
Ukyou put her hand on her rival's. "I know you wanted a marriage to last a lifetime. But if all the passion is in yelling at each other, is it really a marriage?"
Akane wasn't sure if the girl was trying to be comforting or was trying to break her wrist. "There is more passion than just the fighting. I honestly do want to make it work."
"Takes two to tango, and if Ranma doesn't work at it, what hope is there?" Ukyou growled. "If you don't mind, I've got work to attend to."
Akane nodded slowly and moved to walk out of the restaurant.
"Why'd she have to tell me right when I've got a hundred thousand yen catering order to put together," Ukyou hissed under her breath.
--------------------
"Heard you went to see Ucchan," Ranma stated harshly.
Akane flinched. "She deserved to know the truth and I could've used her as a warm-up fight."
"So you thought you'd fight her in her home turf?" Ranma growled. "Shampoo isn't stupid enough to try that. She's bound to have that place rigged in case someone decided to attack her."
Akane grimaced.
"What did happen?" Ranma wondered.
"Ukyou fully expects that once I'm pregnant you'll drop me and run off with her," Akane remarked bitterly. "That it's only obligation behind our marriage. That we'll never stay together with all our fighting."
"The fighting is half the fun," Ranma remarked.
"And making up is the other half." Akane blushed.
"Pervert," Ranma playfully growled.
"Hey! Who's the pervert?" Akane yelled.
"I'd say the one who likes cock and cunt," Ranma teased.
Akane was beet red, mostly as their parents were now behind Ranma staring at her. "Take that back!"
"Then don't bring in the water!" Ranma stuck his tongue and ran away.
Akane immediately ran after him.
Nabiki stepped out from where she was hiding, pressing stop on her tape recorder. "Weirdest foreplay ever."
Soun stared in the direction the young couple had run off to. "But they're not married yet."
Nabiki raised an eyebrow. "You filed the paperwork yourself. They are legally married. Akane even has the marriage certificate in her room."
"But the ceremony?" Soun wondered.
"Meant jack shit," Nabiki chided. "Why do you think I invited everyone? It was already too late for them to do anything."
Nodoka frowned. "It only delayed in announcing they're together."
"And that comes to an end when she faces Shampoo this weekend," Genma noted morbidly.
Nabiki frowned. "What are Akane's chances?"
"Not good. Shampoo knows Akane has been training, and set the challenge to give herself time to freshen and sharpen her own skills." Genma shook his head. "At least Ranma is helping her training, even now running through the city will help her speed and flexibility."
"The master certainly made sure we got that sort of training, though more as the one being chased than being the chaser." Soun shuddered, and then once again gazed in the direction his daughter had run off to. "My baby is all grown up!"
"Yes. Yes." Nabiki turned around. "You'll be a grandpa before you know it."
"Assuming Shampoo doesn't kill her," Genma muttered.
"My baby is going to die!" Soun wailed.
Nodoka smacked her husband's arm.
--------------------
"And now for the event over a year in the making: Shampoo verses Saotome Akane!" Nabiki announced. "That's right folks, _Saotome_ Akane. The explosive wedding ceremony didn't mean a thing as Ranma and Akane were already legally married. And unless you've been under a rock, the reason for this fight is self-explanatory."
Shampoo pointed at her foe. "I will not let you steal what is mine."
"Ranma was never yours to begin with," Akane shot back.
"Winner gets to keep Ranma, loser gets lovely funeral," Shampoo spoke her terms.
Akane glared. "Ranma isn't a piece of meat to be fought over. He's not going to marry you, ever."
"We'll see about that after he finds out what a real martial artist is like in bed," Shampoo gloated. "I've got more to offer."
"He doesn't want what a glass of water gives him," Akane returned smugly. "You've got nothing he wants."
"I'll show him he's got more with me than a beautiful wife instead of a flat-chested gorilla." Shampoo posed to highlight her endowments. "I'll give him more than an old, busted up dojo with no students, but an entire village of warriors eager to learn to fight. Thousands of years of martial arts lore and techniques that he can learn. He would really be the greatest fighter of all time. What can you teach him? How to change diapers and make a budget? And he'd have a wife who can cook, which you'll never be good at. My great-grandmother would teach him many great things. With you, he gets a father-in-law who is a human water faucet, one sister whose head isn't home even though she never leaves the house, and another sister who would sell her mother's ashes for a hundred yen."
Akane's angry glare drilled holes through Shampoo.
Nabiki's eye went wide.
"Not that your mother was worth much, dying before she could properly raise you." Shampoo shrugged dismissively. "Or was it that she was worthless for what she did teach you?"
"Fuck," Ranma moaned.
"Kill that bitch!" Nabiki screeched.
Akane roared in anger, and ran with fist raised, ready to strike despite Ranma's insistence that she should be reactive to the Amazon's attacks and not go full on offensive.
Shampoo smirked as she leapfrogged over her opponent, her fingers pressing down onto Akane's scalp.
Akane couldn't see, couldn't think. All there was before her was a cat to be skinned alive. Punch after punch, kick after kick only met open air. It was only when Shampoo had the audacity to fake a yawn that Akane connected with a punch, and that forced the Amazon's to hastily block the attack with her forearm.
Again Shampoo leapt over Akane, her fingers pressing down on the Japanese girl's head. Once again the amazon retreated from Akane's attacks in a straight line.
"Watch what she's doing, moron!" Ranma yelled. "She's about to pull a move on you!"
"You saw what Shampoo did," Cologne noted. She shook her head slightly. "Your wife can't think straight."
Shampoo rocketed both her hands toward Akane as if to push her back like a sumo-wrestler. Only Akane didn't just fall back a step, she rocketed away flying through a metal fence and crashing into the school.
"See? You're just a silly girl who is no match for me," Shampoo gloated. "I know of many more techniques like that. Best to come home, husband, so I can teach you."
A roar bellowed from the school.
"I warned you about using those pressure points on someone with anger management issues," Cologne chastised.
An explosion created a new hole in the school and a thunderous crash echoed as a crater formed in the school field. Akane panted angrily, her feral eyes locked on her opponent.
Shampoo was once again on the defensive, yet because of Akane's anger it was a simple matter of evading the attacks. The field, however, would seriously need to be replaced.
"You have the right to interfere," Cologne mentioned. "You just can't win the fight for Akane."
Ranma seemed to vanish and appear behind his wife. His hands blurred and Akane stumbled forward.
Shampoo scowled, yet took the opportunity to kick the side of her opponent's head. "You shouldn't interfere. You'll be happier with me."
"I seriously doubt that," Ranma snapped at her.
Shampoo turned to face her opponent only to find that Akane had already spun to her feet and launched her own kick right between the Amazon's legs. Whoever said that doesn't work on girls never knew the sudden pain of attempted rape by shoe.
Now the battle was fully joined, Akane and Shampoo traded punches and kicks. Even without resorting to special techniques, Shampoo still gave more than she received. If not for Bakusai Tenketsu, Akane would've already fallen to Shampoo. A sickening crack echoed, announcing that Akane's left arm broke blocking Shampoo's deadly kick. The Amazon did not relent and Akane didn't yield. Another blow to the chest probably cracked a few ribs.
Akane stumbled back and fell onto her back. She panted as Shampoo loomed above her.
"Last chance. Give Ranma to me," Shampoo demanded.
"Never," Akane hissed through her pain.
"Your funeral." Shampoo raised her arm to strike but her fist failed to moved forward as a wooden walking staff tapped her arm. "Great-grandmother?!"
"Land that blow and there would be a funeral... yours." Cologne pointed at Ranma who was seething in anger yet wasn't moving. "I declare this a draw, Akane may not be able to defeat you, but you won't win the prize either. Had I not restrained Ranma, he might've taken your head off when you broke her arm."
Shampoo stared at her beloved with wide, frightened eyes. She had been in Jusendo and knew very well what happened to Saffron. And now the one she loved was glaring through her with murderous intent. "Ranma..."
"Dear, you must accept that it was not meant to be. Ranma doesn't love you the way you want," Cologne told her sadly.
"But the law? If I return now..." Shampoo trailed off.
"As your teacher I can take your punishment onto myself. Your failure shall be my own." Cologne sighed dramatically. "I hereby banish myself from the village, never to return or face death."
"But great-grandmother... you would do that for me?" Shampoo couldn't believe what she was hearing.
"Yes, Dear. Now renounce your claim, else Ranma may yet unleash his ire on you," Cologne told her.
Shampoo frowned as she walked up to the still frozen Ranma. "I honestly do love you. It wasn't about the law. If you ever grow tired of that violent girl, I will welcome you." She leaned forward and kissed him soundly. She then kneed him in the balls. "You are not my husband. Good-bye, beloved." She ran away crying.
Cologne poked Ranma, releasing him from her restraining pressure points. He immediately fought the pain Shampoo had inflicted on him to move to Akane's side.
"Are you okay?" Ranma asked desperately.
"A few broken bones. I'll be fine," Akane wheezed. She turned her head. "Is it really over?"
"Shampoo's claim has been broken," Cologne assured her.
"What happens now?" Akane wondered.
"Shampoo can go home, or stay here. Mousse would follow her." Cologne smirked. "As for me, I must endure the shame of remaining here. This fight actually took longer than expected. I'm missing my favorite television show. I need to find out who is the father of Michiko's baby."
--------------------
Akane wasn't pleased with the way Ranma stayed ahead of her scouting for trouble. Three cracked ribs and a broken arm didn't make her an invalid. She couldn't even 'celebrate' her 'draw' because Ranma was afraid he'd hurt her.
"What is this I hear that you have forced the beauteous Tendo Akane to forcibly marry thee and thrust your horrid name on her," Kuno bellowed.
"Everything, including the _thrusting_ was her idea," Ranma taunted.
Akane turned beet red, not missing the double meaning of her husband's statement. "Ranma?!" She swung her plaster encased arm at him.
"What the hell are you doing?!" Ranma caught the arm, gently slowly it down. "Are you trying to hurt yourself more?"
"Then don't even insinuate anything about _that_!" Akane shot at him.
"Foul cur, you are not a man for allowing her to be hurt at the hands of one of your concubines," Kuno intoned angrily.
"You try stopping her from fighting and see where that gets you," Ranma shot back.
"It was my battle to fight," Akane added.
"To save Tendo Akane from her horrid marriage, I will smite thee!" Kuno took a step forward, bokken poised to strike.
Ranma grabbed the weapon and yanked it from Kuno's hands. "Don't you dare point that near Akane." He then broke it over his upperclassman's head.
Kuno fell bonelessly to the ground.
Principal Kuno suddenly popped out of a potted plant and didn't give his son a second look. "Ah, you two have been baaaaaad students. Inappropriate behavior and damages to the school property."
"Send the bill to Nabiki, and we will work out a method of repaying it," Ranma told him seriously. "And hell would freeze over before she would do anything _inappropriate_ here."
"Ranma!" Akane cried out hitting him with her good right arm, sending him flying.
Ranma quickly leapt to his feet and rubbed where she hit him. "Geez, you really do hit like a truck now."
Ukyou strode up to him. "Just hurry up and knock her up, then you won't have to deal with her anymore."
Ranma didn't bother to give her a reply.
"Hey, handsome, you okay?" Kudo questioned as Kuno began to wake up.
The upperclassman took one look at the young man hovering over him, screamed and ran away.
Kudo pranced after him. "Come back, my little samurai stud muffin of love."
"Nihao!" Shampoo chirped. "Delivery for Gosunkugi?"
"Thought you were going home," Akane groused.
"Got a letter from home... actually from Hong Kong. Father has moved there with most of the village." Shampoo shrugged. "The younger members of the village have been moving away for years. Elders have decided it was time to move on. Village is now for sale, if you want it."
"What would I want a backwater village for?" Akane wondered.
Shampoo ignored her as she looked at her 'ex-husband.' "Staying here will be better for us. If you get tired of your wife, come to me and I'll show you what a real woman can do." She then pranced away to finish her delivery to the gloomy boy who had placed the order.
Ranma shook his head. "We're married, but nothing has really changed, has it?"
"Nope, nothing has changed," Akane commented as she watched Mousse attack Kudo thinking he was Ranma chasing after Shampoo.
--------------------
Author's Notes:
This is it for the story. I wrote what I wanted to for it. Yes, I resolved a few points of Ranma 1/2, namely Kodachi, who had zero chance of winning Ranma, and Ryouga, who was already being written as a non-issue toward the end of the manga. Yes, I also left a few things unresolved, namely Ukyou as she wasn't going to quietly walk away. Ukyou not accepting the situation was actually part of the point. All to often with stories dealing with 'Ranma and Akane getting married,' all the relationship issues are dealt with and everyone lives 'happily ever after.' That realistically wasn't going to happen and was likely why Rumiko Takahashi ended the series with a failed wedding, because there was no way to resolve all the issues reasonably. As such, following the issues of the manga, I didn't resolve everything here either and had no plans to do so. Just because Ranma and Akane are fully married, it doesn't mean their problems magically go away.
As for Akane getting smacked down by Shampoo despite being seriously trained, let's be realistic. At the start of Ranma 1/2 Akane's martial arts abilities were within the realms of human ability. No special moves, no ultimate chi attacks, nothing that a real person couldn't learn. At the same time, Shampoo was already able to punch holes through walls and was the best fighter of her generation in a village filled ancient martial arts practices and special moves. The only way Akane could ever hope to be Shampoo's equal would either require magical assistance, like the Battle Douji, or for Shampoo to be unable to train for a significant period of time to allow Akane to close the gap between them.