Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction ❯ Furyouhin ❯ Chapter 1

 

 

Furyouhin

 

 

By Lord Raa

 

 

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Disclaim-me-do: Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

 

This is an AU, and that means I shall be taking elements from two (or more) series and mangling them up good and proper. Why? Because I thought it would be funny.

 

You can consider yourselves duly warned.

 

 

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The morning sunlight filtered through the curtains of a small apartment in Tokyo. Before it could annoy the occupant enough to wake her, an alarm clock started to sound.

 

“Bah!” a purple haired girl complained as she fumbled around for an off switch.

 

After ending the shrill beeping noise, the girl sat up and stretched. `It's a good thing that great-grandmother isn't here,' she mused silently. `She'd be standing here, complaining that this big city life is making me soft.'

 

Shedding her covers, the girl rose to her feet and started her morning callisthenics, thankful that she had managed to find a Venetian blind that covered most of the window.

 

She had learnt quickly that you shouldn't perform high kicks wearing shorts right by a window that people could see in from, especially when the neighbourhood had several high school age boys in it.

 

Her face took on a frown that made her look cute rather than intimidating. “Damn perverts,” she muttered in Chinese.

 

After a few more kicks and punches at invisible enemies, Shampoo had finished her exercises and was now wide awake.

 

“Time for breakfast,” she said, switching to Japanese.

 

 

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Walking to school, Shampoo took her usual route through the market place, making a note of what was on special. Judging by the looks of things, she'd be having mackerel for her evening meal.

 

Her quick perusal for dinnertime options was interrupted by a cry of “where am I now?” that caused her to sigh tiredly.

 

“What now, Lost Boy?” she asked the school wanderer.

 

“Shampoo? What are you doing here in Osaka?” the muscular boy asked the buxom exchange student.

 

“We in Tokyo, stupid!” Shampoo relied angrily. She checked her watch. “And now we have to go or we be late for school!”

 

Ryoga blushed when Shampoo took his hand and lead him towards school. Shampoo saw the effect her contact had on her classmate and shook her head.

 

It wasn't that this classmate of hers was unattractive, far from it. But Ryoga Hibiki was infamous for not being able to find his way out of a room with one door. Not to mention that he had a bad habit of jumping to conclusions, often causing major property damage as he tried to “protect” Shampoo from unwanted attention.

 

She had tried to explain, on several occasions, that she was a skilled martial artist and was able to look after herself, but the Hibiki boy would have none of it.

 

But at least he wasn't as annoying as her fellow exchange student, Mousse.

 

Mousse was also a martial artist from the same village as Shampoo, though the purple haired girl often wondered how he had managed to blag his way on to the exchange program.

 

As heir to one of the village elders, Shampoo was expect to have some knowledge of the outside world, and so her great-grandmother, Cologne, suggested that she make this trip and spend a few years in Japan as a student. Other heirs were travelling to Europe and America for the same reasons.

 

“Shampoo!” a male voice cried out.

 

“Damn!” the two students cursed in unison.

 

“Lost Boy,” Shampoo started, “You grab Mousse and we all go school, ok?”

 

“Yes, Shampoo,” Ryoga stammered. He always did that when he was at the centre of Shampoo's attention.

 

Shampoo headed towards her partially sighted compatriot, hoping that her two unwanted suitors would not start fighting before school started.

 

“Shampoo, my love!” the robe clad boy said with his arms wide.

 

“Mousse,” Shampoo growled in response.

 

Mousse's smile grew when he could see the purple-haired woman of his dreams running towards him. `Perhaps this is the day my luck finally changes.'

 

What was there to say about Mousse? Well, he was persistent, he had that going for him and while he was a competent martial artist (his hidden weapons style was quite formidable), he had a number of flaws.

 

First off, he was as blind as a bat without his glasses, which he frequently took off to stare down Ryoga and any other boy that tried to talk to Shampoo in an attempt to intimidate them. Second, he was as stubborn as a herd of mules. Shampoo had told him since she was a child that she wasn't interested in him, but he wouldn't have any of it.

 

And to top it all off, he had roving hands, like some of the local males.

 

As the long haired boy prepared to spout some garbage about his love rushing to his arms, Shampoo manoeuvred Ryoga into position to grab the vision impaired student.

 

“Now Lost Boy!” Shampoo shouted as she changed course slightly.

 

Ryoga reached forward and seized Mousse by the collar as they passed.

 

The student convoy continued towards the local high school, only to have their path blocked by the school muppet, Tatewaki Kuno.

 

“Halt, scoundrels,” he pompously demanded. “Unhand the exotic flower that is Shampoo or I shall be forced to dispense the justice of the heavens!”

 

Enter the third male troublemaker in Shampoo's life: Tatewaki Kuno, captain of the school kendo team.

 

“Stupid Stick Boy never listen to Shampoo,” the Chinese girl grumbled as she neared the gates. “Shampoo belong to nobody!”

 

A thought occurred to Ryoga, he had a chance to aid Shampoo and get rid of the bumbling, blind idiot in at the end of his arm. He swung Mousse round, using him like a bowling ball in an attempt to remove the obstacle in his way.

 

Kuno saw the bespectacled boy hurtling towards him. He tried to deflect the missile with an upward slash, but it was too little, too late and the two students ended up in a tangled heap.

 

“Come on, Lost Boy,” Shampoo said, smiling at the pile of idiots in front of her. “Lesson starting soon.”

 

“Ok, Shampoo,” Ryoga replied with a blush when he realised that he was still holding Shampoo's hand.

 

 

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In Ryoga's homeroom, there was the sound of gossip. It seemed that their school would be getting a new student soon. And not only that, this new student was from so far away, it would make the two Chinese exchange students look like locals in comparison.

 

A tired Shampoo collapsed into her chair, having dumped Ryoga in his place. “Baka Lost Boy. Baka Mousse. Baka Stick Boy,” she grumbled, her Japanese improving almost every week.

 

A few moments later, the door opened again and in walked their teacher, Miss Mitsuka Yoshimine, with a sensual sway to her hips.

 

The lady in question was young when compared to the other teachers of Fujuubun High, but there was something about her behaviour that unsettled many of the students.

 

She was a bit of an exhibitionist as was evidenced when she occasionally forgot to put on some of her clothes. While some might say she's just scatterbrained, she did set additional homework for those students that were falling behind in her lesson, proving that she wasn't totally incompetent.

 

Not only did her occasional lack of clothing disturb some of the student body, her choice of study material in her English lessons was questionable to say the least. Lady Chatterley's Lover was not on the syllabus of most high schools in the Tokyo area.

 

“Now, now class. I have some interesting news to tell you all if you'll settle down.”

 

When the class took their seats, Miss Yoshimine sat on her desk. As most of the class expected, she made enough of a show of crossing her shapely legs for them to see that she was wearing stockings and a garter belt.

 

“Now then, our school has been selected to host a very special exchange student. I'm sure that you are all aware of our recent visitors are being granted citizenship, and as part of the process, a DearS student has been selected for a home-stay.”

 

This nugget of information set the class into gossip mode. Even the quiet one in the class, Hikaru Gosunkugi, looked excited as he activated his laptop to update his fellow DearS enthusiasts.

 

Shampoo remained unfazed by this announcement, though she wondered what the alien student would look like.

 

As did her teacher, though for different reasons.

 

“Oh my, perhaps the student will be a handsome man?” Mitsuka-sensei wondered with a glint in her eye.

 

Shampoo shook her head in dismay, knowing full well what her teacher was thinking about. “Pervert Teacher,” she commented under her breath.

 

“Ah, but what if it's a girl? Well, I'm sure that she'll be beautiful, too,” the morally flexible educator added, inadvertently sending the blood pressure of most of her male students through the roof.

 

But this was mainly because she had also asked the class “if this student was female, would she have breasts as large as mine?” while hefting her own cleavage.

 

Again Shampoo grumbled about the number of perverts in this strange land.

 

 

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Elsewhere, there was a figure clad in a cloak wandering silently through the back streets of a Tokyo suburb, keeping out of sight as much as it could. Its wandering became a stumble as the figure felt the effects of hunger.

 

Finally it collapsed against a brick wall, and passed out.

 

 

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After lunch, Shampoo was changing for her class's PE lesson. She wondered why the other students had so much trouble with the endurance run that they were doing that afternoon.

 

Opting against suggesting that it was because of them being weaklings, she kept her opinion to herself. Shampoo was a quick learner, it was one of the things about her that made her great-grandmother proud, and it only took one incident to alienate most of the student body. When she was younger, she'd been as candid with people her own age as she was back home, the problem with that was that the Japanese were quite different about what opinions could and should be expressed in public.

 

Not that the girls that took offence to her comments about their physical prowess were able to beat her in the ensuing melee.

 

Closing her locker door, she walked with her classmates out to the assembly point, here the PE teacher, Mr. Yamazaki, stood waiting for them.

 

“Right then,” the man in his early thirties started, “since you are here first, you can all be in the first group. The route is 16 kilometres in length and you should be looking to complete it in about two hours.”

 

Shampoo raised her hand.

 

“Yes, Shampoo?”

 

“Are we carrying things?”

 

“No,” the teacher shook his head. “What ever gave you that idea?”

 

“I thought this an endurance test,” the Amazon replied.

 

“Shampoo, just because you've been training in martial arts since you were a toddler, that doesn't mean you should show off.”

 

"What you mean? Combat training only way to fight off wild animals," the exchange student explained. “If students attacked and eaten by wolves on school trip, you no come crying to Shampoo.”

 

“That's not going to happen,” Yamazaki insisted. “This school doesn't have trips like that. Stop scaring the other students.”

 

Shampoo shrugged before half-heartedly apologising to the rest of her class.

 

“Right, now everyone get into your running groups,” the teacher ordered.

 

 

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It was not a huge surprise to Shampoo that she was leading the girl's group in the endurance run by a large margin. Nor was it that her times were better than the boys' when they did the same run. No, what was surprising was the fact that she had found what might been a body leaning on a wall.

 

“Hello?” Not getting a response, Shampoo moved in closer. She wished that she was armed, having seen this trick employed several times in the past, both with animals and people.

 

“Hello? Are you all right?” she asked again.

 

A groan answered her.

 

“Well, at least you not dead,” Shampoo mused. Lifting the barely clothed figure to its feet, Shampoo noticed that it seemed to have a male body. Or that's what she thought it was when she had to move her hands across its chest to keep it from falling.

 

When what appeared to be a muscle spasm affected the stricken body, Shampoo became unbalanced and fell backwards. She became tangled in the cloak and twisted as she fell. Bracing herself for the fall, she closed her eyes for a moment.

 

When she opened them, she noticed that she was now lying on top of a naked boy in the middle of the street.

 

“Youngsters these days,” a bespectacled woman in her forties commented to her friend as they looked on at the lewd scene unfolding before them.

 

“I know what you mean, Rumiko,” a slightly shorter, and similarly woman bespectacled agreed. “Have you no shame, young lady? We have love hotels for that sort of thing, you know.”

 

Shampoo glared daggers at the interfering housewives before getting up off the prone naked man.

 

`Not bad at all,' Shampoo thought as she noticed just how naked this man was.

 

The young man on the floor seemed to regain consciousness. Noticing that he was naked as he stood up, he covered his waist with his rags.

 

“What's your name?” Shampoo asked.

 

“Ranmasaotomenobakamysteriousrankoredheadgoddesstendo.”

 

“Pardon?”

 

“Ranmasaotomenobakamysteriousrankoredheadgoddesstendo,” the partially clothed male repeated.

 

Shampoo scratched her head as she tried to figure out what to do next. “I not call you that long name. I call you Ranma for now, we can sort out last name later. Why are you here dressed like that?”

 

The male, now called Ranma, just shrugged.

 

 

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To be continued…?

 

Well, that depends on a multitude of things, some of which are beyond your control.

 

This chapter was pre-read by Chi Vayne, in between my annoying him with inane caption “humour”.

 

As referenced in an earlier post, this is my story that focuses on a character I've neglected somewhat.

 

Are there any questions?

 

Until laterer comes.