Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction ❯ Of Men and Kittens ❯ Chapter 5 ( Chapter 5 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: IronDragoon 
Anime/Manga: Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction | Genre(s): | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 08.11.2005 | Pages: 3 | Words: 1.6K | Visits: 1.3K | Status: Completed
Anime/Manga: Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction | Genre(s): | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 08.11.2005 | Pages: 3 | Words: 1.6K | Visits: 1.3K | Status: Completed
Of Men and Kittens
Chapter 5
By: Iron Dragoon
======================================================================== =============================
Panting and glaring at his opponent through one puffy eye, Ranma took stock of his situation.
'Eye, swollen shut.. Check.
Jaw, broken... Check.
Hand, right, fractured... Check.
Ribs, bruised and broken.. Double Check.
All righty then, list looks good.'
“Shit.”
======================================================================== =============================
Gasping, bleeding, staggering, and fuzzy headed, Ryu took stock of his situation.
'Cheek, shattered.. A-yup.
Jaw, dislocated.. Absolutely.
Forearm, left, broken.. Sure is.
Ribs, shattered and broken. Of-fucking-course.
Foot, left, broken... Why wouldn't it be?
Shin, left leg, broken in two places... Hell yeah.
Check list confirmed, processing response...'
“...ouchies...”
======================================================================== =============================
“.. So, Mu Tzu, do you think your cousin is smart enough to back down?”
“.... Nope.”
“I hold similar hopes for Ranma as well.”
“Yeah, I figured as much. But, you know, Ryu is doing better than you thought he would be, isn't he?” Mu Tzu jabbed at her, still staring at the two fighters in morbid fascination as they limped toward each other with the greatest rage possible from two barely conscious people.
“Indeed he is.. I was quite surprised when young Ryu began using similar types of strikes as Ranma.”
“Similar? Ryu's style is nothing like Ranma's! I've never seen anything close to Ranma's style before!”
“Be happy of that, Mu Tzu. If you had, I doubt you would still be living. No, what I meant was, similar in the attitude of the styles. They both seem to be designed around lethal strikes and counter attacks.”
“Lethal? But both of them have landed blows and both are still living!”
“Yes, quite. But both have amazing skill and stamina. I'm quite impressed that two fighters of their skill exist today.”
“Hey, they stopped!” Mu Tzu exclaimed, turning back to the bloody fight.
======================================================================== =============================
“Hey, you...” muttered Ryu, panting.
“What?” returned Ranma, breathing just as hard.
“You know a guy named Bison?”
“Bison? Like the cow?”
“Yeah.”
“No. You attacking the village?” questioned Ranma.
“No. I'm visiting my cousin.”
“Oh.”
“Uhh.. Yeah.”
“We're morons, aren't we?” groaned Ranma.
“Yeah, I think that fits right now. Wanna introduce ourselves?” asked Ryu ans he straightened... somewhat..
“... Nah.. We can do that after we wake up. Sound good?”
“Works for me. Night, dude.”
“Yeah, night man.”
Both passed flat the fuck out at that.
======================================================================== =============================
“Huh. Wonder what they talked about?”
“As do I, Mu Tzu, as do I. Shall we collect them?”
With a shrug and a sigh, Mu Tzu stands up and brushes the grass and dirt off his robes. “Sure, not like anything is happening anymore.”
With that, the two observers gathered the fallen, and dragged the two over powered, clueless fighters home.
======================================================================== ============================
“Unnnnggg...”
“Uhhhrrrrr...”
“Yes, I imagined thats what you two wold say,” smirked the Elder at the two bloodied youths.
“What the hell happened?” asked Ranma, peering through an aching eye.
“Well, Ryu, the man next to you, happened.”
“Ryu?” a quick glance. “Oh. Ryu.”
“Yeah, that'd be me. You're the one that happened to me, right?”
“Yeah. Ranma. Nice ta meet ya.” holding a fist up in greeting.
“Oh, yeah. My pleasure." returned Ryu, lightly klacking fists with his partner in stupidity. "That mule kick to the shin was harsh, but nice. My compliments.”
“Thanks! I was really impressed by that upper cut technique of yours. What was it?”
“The Shoryuken. And thanks, it took me a while to get it down right. First time I tried it, I missed on the landing. Slipped and fell on my ass.”
“Oh, I know how that works. First time I tried a split kick, I talked funny for a week.”
Kuh Lon coughed to gain their attention. “As amusing as it is to listen to your... training mishaps... perhaps you two should be doing something more constructive? Like, say.. Eat dinner?”
Two steely stares slowly turned in synchronization to stare at her, calm with lethal intent.
“...eat...” Ranma muttered quietly.
“...dinner...” finished Ryu, just as silently.
Kuh Lon, faced with two of coldest, hardest gazes she'd ever met did the only thing anyone could do when faced with the murderous intent of those two stomachs.
She got the HELL outta the way.
======================================================================== ============================
Staring mortified at the massacre being done upon the meal, and conscious of the teary, fearful stares of the village cooks who were currently crowded into a corner and clutching each other, Kuh Lon summoned up her courage and approached the field of battle.
“Ryu, as much as you're enjoying your... meal... I must speak to you.”
With a great put-upon sigh of loss and regret, Ryu rose from the table, glaring at Ranma as he grinned in triumph and hoarded the rest of his portion.
Leading him to her house, Kuh Lon sat Ryu down.
“I gathered from Mu Tzu that you came to visit and meet up with your family?”
“Yes, Ranko sent me a letter, reminding me about the tournament.”
“Ahh, good, good. She was here for the tournament, even though you were late,” she smirked at him.
“Yeah, that's what Mu Tzu said. Something about an incident and them having to leave unexpectedly.”
“Yes.. That 'incident' is what I need to speak to you about.. You see..”
======================================================================== =============================
Ranma glanced up, staring off towards Kuh Lon's house.
“Huh. Wonder why such a healthy guy like Ryu had a heart attack for...”
With a shrug, he put it out of his mind. After all.. More pressing things were screaming for his attention.
Like cupcakes.
======================================================================== =============================
Helping the boy off the floor, Kuh Lon added, “That's the exact response your mother had, as well. Very unbecoming of a warrior. Your father's reaction was much more acceptable.”
“Oh, and what did father do?”
“Well, when he found out young Ranko had intercourse with her savior, he swore death upon the poor boy.”
“Death? Intercour--” Ryu's brain, catching up after the spontaneous heart attack, promptly burst into goo and fled the premises through his left ear.
======================================================================== =============================
Sitting back, and sighing in content, Ranma glanced up at the house again with half-lidded eyes.
“The hell? He's dead? Wonder what happened to kill Ryu that quick...”
Quirking an eyebrow momentarily, he added, “Oh, there he goes. Good, I still owe him for the jaw.”
======================================================================== =============================
“Hmmm.. You seem to take after your mother. While appropriate as she is the stronger sex, the reactions are quite.. Unbecoming.”
“I'm so sorry to disappoint you. Maybe I could work up something better IF YOU STOP KILLING ME FROM SURPRISE!” he bellowed at her.
“There we go. Now that's a good reaction. Keep that in mind as you hear the next part...”
“MORE?! THERE'S MORE?! DEAR GOD!!”
“Yes, quite. You see, Ranma showed up a few days after Ranko left, looking for someone he saved in the springs. He's quite set on finding her again, too. With quite honorable intentions. I should know, I can recognize a good soul when I see one.”
Ryu sucked in air with a girly squeak as his brain caught the gist of that statement. Right before he decided, 'Fuck it. I'm just gonna kill myself now.'
Kuh Lon was quite amused when he grabbed the steel cauldron and began beating his head with it.
======================================================================== =============================
I need help, readers.
I started this fic two years ago. Before this chapter, that was also the same time I last wrote on it. In those two years, due to being deployed to Iraq, all fucking clue, vague or otherwise, on where I was planning to take this fic has fled my brain, joyous in it's liberation. So, I need suggestions. Ideas. Give me things or characters you'd like to see in this fic. Also, give me character relationships you'd like to see. Who you want to be enemies, who you want to be friends. Be fore-warned though, I despise Akane, so if any of you like her, I suggest you stop reading. I'm gonna make her look like the retard she is. Though, I will have her grow into an acceptable character. Through pain.
Anyway, give me your feed back and ideas. After all, your ideas are what you wanna read, and if you get what you want, you enjoy it more!
-Iron Dragoon
Chapter 5
By: Iron Dragoon
======================================================================== =============================
Panting and glaring at his opponent through one puffy eye, Ranma took stock of his situation.
'Eye, swollen shut.. Check.
Jaw, broken... Check.
Hand, right, fractured... Check.
Ribs, bruised and broken.. Double Check.
All righty then, list looks good.'
“Shit.”
======================================================================== =============================
Gasping, bleeding, staggering, and fuzzy headed, Ryu took stock of his situation.
'Cheek, shattered.. A-yup.
Jaw, dislocated.. Absolutely.
Forearm, left, broken.. Sure is.
Ribs, shattered and broken. Of-fucking-course.
Foot, left, broken... Why wouldn't it be?
Shin, left leg, broken in two places... Hell yeah.
Check list confirmed, processing response...'
“...ouchies...”
======================================================================== =============================
“.. So, Mu Tzu, do you think your cousin is smart enough to back down?”
“.... Nope.”
“I hold similar hopes for Ranma as well.”
“Yeah, I figured as much. But, you know, Ryu is doing better than you thought he would be, isn't he?” Mu Tzu jabbed at her, still staring at the two fighters in morbid fascination as they limped toward each other with the greatest rage possible from two barely conscious people.
“Indeed he is.. I was quite surprised when young Ryu began using similar types of strikes as Ranma.”
“Similar? Ryu's style is nothing like Ranma's! I've never seen anything close to Ranma's style before!”
“Be happy of that, Mu Tzu. If you had, I doubt you would still be living. No, what I meant was, similar in the attitude of the styles. They both seem to be designed around lethal strikes and counter attacks.”
“Lethal? But both of them have landed blows and both are still living!”
“Yes, quite. But both have amazing skill and stamina. I'm quite impressed that two fighters of their skill exist today.”
“Hey, they stopped!” Mu Tzu exclaimed, turning back to the bloody fight.
======================================================================== =============================
“Hey, you...” muttered Ryu, panting.
“What?” returned Ranma, breathing just as hard.
“You know a guy named Bison?”
“Bison? Like the cow?”
“Yeah.”
“No. You attacking the village?” questioned Ranma.
“No. I'm visiting my cousin.”
“Oh.”
“Uhh.. Yeah.”
“We're morons, aren't we?” groaned Ranma.
“Yeah, I think that fits right now. Wanna introduce ourselves?” asked Ryu ans he straightened... somewhat..
“... Nah.. We can do that after we wake up. Sound good?”
“Works for me. Night, dude.”
“Yeah, night man.”
Both passed flat the fuck out at that.
======================================================================== =============================
“Huh. Wonder what they talked about?”
“As do I, Mu Tzu, as do I. Shall we collect them?”
With a shrug and a sigh, Mu Tzu stands up and brushes the grass and dirt off his robes. “Sure, not like anything is happening anymore.”
With that, the two observers gathered the fallen, and dragged the two over powered, clueless fighters home.
======================================================================== ============================
“Unnnnggg...”
“Uhhhrrrrr...”
“Yes, I imagined thats what you two wold say,” smirked the Elder at the two bloodied youths.
“What the hell happened?” asked Ranma, peering through an aching eye.
“Well, Ryu, the man next to you, happened.”
“Ryu?” a quick glance. “Oh. Ryu.”
“Yeah, that'd be me. You're the one that happened to me, right?”
“Yeah. Ranma. Nice ta meet ya.” holding a fist up in greeting.
“Oh, yeah. My pleasure." returned Ryu, lightly klacking fists with his partner in stupidity. "That mule kick to the shin was harsh, but nice. My compliments.”
“Thanks! I was really impressed by that upper cut technique of yours. What was it?”
“The Shoryuken. And thanks, it took me a while to get it down right. First time I tried it, I missed on the landing. Slipped and fell on my ass.”
“Oh, I know how that works. First time I tried a split kick, I talked funny for a week.”
Kuh Lon coughed to gain their attention. “As amusing as it is to listen to your... training mishaps... perhaps you two should be doing something more constructive? Like, say.. Eat dinner?”
Two steely stares slowly turned in synchronization to stare at her, calm with lethal intent.
“...eat...” Ranma muttered quietly.
“...dinner...” finished Ryu, just as silently.
Kuh Lon, faced with two of coldest, hardest gazes she'd ever met did the only thing anyone could do when faced with the murderous intent of those two stomachs.
She got the HELL outta the way.
======================================================================== ============================
Staring mortified at the massacre being done upon the meal, and conscious of the teary, fearful stares of the village cooks who were currently crowded into a corner and clutching each other, Kuh Lon summoned up her courage and approached the field of battle.
“Ryu, as much as you're enjoying your... meal... I must speak to you.”
With a great put-upon sigh of loss and regret, Ryu rose from the table, glaring at Ranma as he grinned in triumph and hoarded the rest of his portion.
Leading him to her house, Kuh Lon sat Ryu down.
“I gathered from Mu Tzu that you came to visit and meet up with your family?”
“Yes, Ranko sent me a letter, reminding me about the tournament.”
“Ahh, good, good. She was here for the tournament, even though you were late,” she smirked at him.
“Yeah, that's what Mu Tzu said. Something about an incident and them having to leave unexpectedly.”
“Yes.. That 'incident' is what I need to speak to you about.. You see..”
======================================================================== =============================
Ranma glanced up, staring off towards Kuh Lon's house.
“Huh. Wonder why such a healthy guy like Ryu had a heart attack for...”
With a shrug, he put it out of his mind. After all.. More pressing things were screaming for his attention.
Like cupcakes.
======================================================================== =============================
Helping the boy off the floor, Kuh Lon added, “That's the exact response your mother had, as well. Very unbecoming of a warrior. Your father's reaction was much more acceptable.”
“Oh, and what did father do?”
“Well, when he found out young Ranko had intercourse with her savior, he swore death upon the poor boy.”
“Death? Intercour--” Ryu's brain, catching up after the spontaneous heart attack, promptly burst into goo and fled the premises through his left ear.
======================================================================== =============================
Sitting back, and sighing in content, Ranma glanced up at the house again with half-lidded eyes.
“The hell? He's dead? Wonder what happened to kill Ryu that quick...”
Quirking an eyebrow momentarily, he added, “Oh, there he goes. Good, I still owe him for the jaw.”
======================================================================== =============================
“Hmmm.. You seem to take after your mother. While appropriate as she is the stronger sex, the reactions are quite.. Unbecoming.”
“I'm so sorry to disappoint you. Maybe I could work up something better IF YOU STOP KILLING ME FROM SURPRISE!” he bellowed at her.
“There we go. Now that's a good reaction. Keep that in mind as you hear the next part...”
“MORE?! THERE'S MORE?! DEAR GOD!!”
“Yes, quite. You see, Ranma showed up a few days after Ranko left, looking for someone he saved in the springs. He's quite set on finding her again, too. With quite honorable intentions. I should know, I can recognize a good soul when I see one.”
Ryu sucked in air with a girly squeak as his brain caught the gist of that statement. Right before he decided, 'Fuck it. I'm just gonna kill myself now.'
Kuh Lon was quite amused when he grabbed the steel cauldron and began beating his head with it.
======================================================================== =============================
I need help, readers.
I started this fic two years ago. Before this chapter, that was also the same time I last wrote on it. In those two years, due to being deployed to Iraq, all fucking clue, vague or otherwise, on where I was planning to take this fic has fled my brain, joyous in it's liberation. So, I need suggestions. Ideas. Give me things or characters you'd like to see in this fic. Also, give me character relationships you'd like to see. Who you want to be enemies, who you want to be friends. Be fore-warned though, I despise Akane, so if any of you like her, I suggest you stop reading. I'm gonna make her look like the retard she is. Though, I will have her grow into an acceptable character. Through pain.
Anyway, give me your feed back and ideas. After all, your ideas are what you wanna read, and if you get what you want, you enjoy it more!
-Iron Dragoon