Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction ❯ The Nightmare Saga: Warrior of Shadows ❯ Ranma’s relationship crisis! Two steps forward, one step back! ( Chapter 8 )

Chapter Eight: Ranma's relationship crisis! Two steps forward, one step back!

Ranma whistled happily to himself as he swept the leaves and dirt away from the walkway that lead from the house to the main gate. Soun watched on, nodding his head happily at the boy's progress. As far as the eldest Tendo could tell, things were finally going as planned in his household. Ever since their date several weeks ago, neither Ranma or Akane had said so much as a nasty word to one another. Their violent fights had finally faded into nothing larger than minor arguments now that a true sense of love had been introduced between them. Things were going exactly as they were supposed to, and it was about damn time!

Soun contemplated this fortunate turn of events and pinched himself to make sure he wasn't dreaming, fighting back his usual flood of tears that came out during such emotional moments. The slight bit of pain he felt as he pinched his skin showed him it wasn't a dream. He looked to the clear blue sky with shining eyes. {I did it, darling! After all these years, our most headstrong daughter has finally come of age!}

Ranma smiled and lifted his face up to look at the warm sun as it rose lazily into the mid-afternoon sky. He knew that his new relationship with Akane was going to cause some major problem in the future, namely with his other fiancée's, but that didn't really bother him. Who knew what else would plague him, but he would handle each challenge that came along, alone if necessary. Alone or not, they'd all be overcome with determination, just like all the other challenges he'd faced in life already. For example, if he could remove the threat of Ryoga, getting rid of his other fiancée's would be a piece of cake in comparison.

Soun lit a cigarette and inhaled deeply, leaning back against the side of the house. "Ranma, have you thought about marriage yet?"

The comment had come right out of left field and had snapped him out of his contemplated thought. He spun to face the elder man with a look of bewilderment etched on his face. "M-marriage?! I'm too young to think about that! Besides, I've still got a lot of training to do! I'm not ready to… I'm just not ready!"

Soun walked up to Ranma and put his hand on the boy's shoulder. "I know the idea seems strange to think about now… but believe me, there was a time when I was just like you."

"Oh?" Ranma had a tough time believing that Soun had ever been like himself. Their personalities seemed to be as different as night as day. Soun was too high strung and emotional, more so than half the children in town, to be sure.

Soun was silent for a moment before he laughed merrily, breaking the stillness between them. "When I was about your age, I was just as dedicated to the martial arts as you are now. Granted, I never went through the kind of adventures you did, and I certainly didn't possess the skills you have now, but it was still a time in my life that required absolute devotion to the Art. Intense training was my only activity and I relished the chance to become stronger. Nothing else mattered to me, the art was everything to me, it was my life, my existence. But one day, someone walked into my life that ended up changing it forever."

"And who was that, Mr. Tendo?" Ranma asked.

Soun smiled softly. "My future wife. She transferred to Furinkan one beautiful spring day, a day just like this one in fact. I fell in love with her gentle kindness and beautiful smile. I used the same devotion I had during my martial arts training towards her. My infatuation with her eventually turned to love, and I knew she was to be my one and only. After a time, she began to return those feelings, and I became the happiest of men. I courted her throughout high school and we were eventually married."

He gazed longingly at the white clouds above, dwelling on thoughts of his deceased beloved. "Our marriage didn't stifle my love for the Arts in the slightest. I continued to train on a regular basis but I also learned a hard lesson in doing so. I found out that life couldn't just be all about me and my wants anymore, not with a family to care for."

Soun's gaze turned serious. "Ranma, someday you too will have such a family. You will have to watch what you say and control your actions to a much greater extent than you do now. It will make things run much more smoothly if you pay a bit more attention to her feelings, and vice versa. You must be ready for it! Don't make some of the same mistakes Genma and I did."

"Hold on a sec, Mr. Tendo! One date with Akane doesn't set anything in stone! I'm not ready to even to think about marriage yet!!!"

Soun waved his hand. "I know, and I don't mean that you must modify your current habits completely. I'm not rushing you into marriage either, not anymore. Only you and Akane will know when that time should come. I'm only trying to prepare you for the future. Remember, you should never change yourself entirely for anyone, not even Akane. A good partner will love you for who you are and accept your faults as part of the package deal. What I'm driving at is, you absolutely do not know how lucky you are!"

Ranma blinked… then blinked again. "Lucky?"

Soun nodded. "Yes. While I love my three little girls equally, Akane possesses one quality neither Kasumi nor Nabiki have."

Ranma grinned and held up his finger. "A passion for brute strength and a tomboyish nature?"

Soun glared. "No. She looks so very much like my dear departed wife. It's this part of her that's making her soul shine so much brighter. You've seen how tender and caring she is towards your well being. My wife behaved much the same way towards me. She loves you deeply, Ranma. The only reason you haven't realized it before now is because you kept driving her off with your childish comments and immature attitude."

Ranma's features darkened. "She does the same thing!"

Soun sighed. "Yes, you're right. She's much like you in a sense. But it's not entirely her fault. The same can be said for you. Both of you were raised without the help of a mother. You see Ranma, by the time my wife had passed on, she had already raised Kasumi and Nabiki into little girls. They were old enough to remember her teaching and life lessons. Akane, on the other hand, can't even recall whole memories of her mother. She was little more than a baby girl when she died."

I've tried to be a good father," he said, sighing. "To my credit, I think I was, but I've come to find that only a woman can truly raise a daughter into womanhood."

Ranma cast his eye's downward. "I uh... never thought about it like that..."

Soun pointed a finger at Ranma. "Exactly! You don't think! Keep Akane's feelings in your heart and mind and maybe you won't say such nasty things to each other in the future. I've already had a similar conversation with her. It's time you both continued on this current good trend and grow up a little bit more. Time is so very precious and the two of you have already wasted enough of it. You are not children anymore."

"Yes sir." Ranma felt himself growing increasing uncomfortable. The normally whiny and skittish Soun Tendo had transformed into a wall of discipline and truth right before his very eyes. He forced himself to meet Soun's firm gaze, swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat.

"Good." Soun turned and started to walk back towards the house. As Ranma raised his arm to continue sweeping, Soun stopped walking, but didn't turn around. Ranma cocked his head to look at the older man again, leaning on the broom.

"Ranma, there is just one more thing I want you to know."

The boy nearly trembled. "Uh, yeah?"

"I'm so very proud of you son! Despite all your faults, you are turning into a brave warrior." That said, Soun walked into the house without further comment.

A brisk wind picked up and rustled Ranma's pants. Then a silence evolved and nothing stirred for an endless moment. "T-thank you..."

"Ranma?"

The boy nearly jumped out of his skin as Akane put her hand on his shoulder. He spun around and jumped back a step nearly falling into a defensive combat stance. "Akane, don't scare me like that!"

Akane retracted her hand as if she had just been burned. "I'm sorry. It's just... I saw Dad talking to you and I wanted to find out what was going on. He looked really serious and that isn't like him at all."

Ranma leaned on the broom and smiled non-convincingly. "Oh, that? It was nuthin, just a man-to-man talk, ya' know?"

Akane beamed and held up a plate. "Oh. Well, anyways, I saw you working hard out here so I baked you some cookies!"

"C-c-cookies!?!" Ranma's heart froze in his chest and his stomach kissed itself goodbye. He clearly remembered what had happened the last time he had tried some of her "homemade" cookies during that bake off competition against Kodachi and he wasn't about to repeat the incident!

Akane nodded happily. "Yeah, don't they look yummy?"

{To a demon of hell maybe!!! That explains the sudden explosion that rocked the kitchen a little while ago. I shoulda' known it was Akane trying to cook again!} Ranma eyed the plate as if it were going to come alive and attack him at any moment. The cookies seemed to have been cut from pieces of concrete and painted brown as an after effect. He started to sweat and took a nervous step backwards. Akane just never learned. True, she had made some small advancements in the art of cooking, but it still sucked! He didn't like having to suffer through all her experiments just because they were engaged.

"Uhhh... gee, Akane, thanks, but.... I'm not really hungry." Ranma waved his hands in front of himself and took a cautious step backwards. Inside, his mind was racing. How was he going to get out of this situation unscathed. He had sampled her cooking many times in the past to keep her happy, and his stomach had suffered in agony as a result. He was still in too good a mood to go through that today.

Akane blinked. "But I made them just for you."

"I appreciate it, but I'm just not hungry." {I'd rather just appreciate living!!!!}

Sparks of anger flickered in her eyes rich, shining eyes. "I spent the last few hours baking these! The least you could do is humor me and taste one. Please? You might be surprised!"

{Yeah, surprised to live through the experience!} Ranma shuttered and jumped backwards again.

"Take one," she roared, throwing a cookie at his mouth with a ball park pitchers precision.

"No!" Ranma batted it away with his hand and instantly yelped in pain as the food hit his palm. It felt like he had just hit solid diamond! He rubbed his aching palm and paled considerably, eyeing the "cookies" as if they were deadly opponents to his continual existence.

"I know you think my cooking is bad, I'm not stupid! Your going to marry me one day, and that means you'll have to trust me! Stop being such a jerk!" Tears threatened to spill from Akane's eyes at any second.

Ranma's temper flared and he found his composure slip away like sand and tumble into the abyss of his anger. "Listen, I've told you very nicely several times that I didn't want one! And just who are you to tell me what I'm going to do with my life? Marrying you is the last thing I'd ever want to do! Got that!? I'm not that desperate! I-" His eyes widened in realization and he clamped his hand over his mouth as his brain caught on to what he was saying but it was far too late, the damage to her heart had already been caused.

"I see..." Her hard slap knocked him sideways.

He recovered his balance a second later and looked at her in shock, clutching his burning cheek. He had just screwed himself over big time, and that hurt far more than any physical injury she could deliver. "Akane, wait I… I didn't mean-"

"I gave you my heart, Ranma. My heart!! I shared my first true kiss with you because I believed in you!!! I thought that after spending so many carefree weeks with you things would finally change. I guess I was wrong, your nothing but a heartless jerk! Just leave me alone!!! Go off and live with Shampoo if I'm so horrible to be with! At least she can cook, right!?" As tears flooded down the sides of her cheeks, she ran into the house, sobbing heavily.

Ranma looked down at his hands in shock as his mind started spin. {What have I done? How did this happen? How could something so trivial explode so fast?! I've said some nasty things before but...} He dropped the broom onto the stone walkway. Waves of guilt consumed him like a furious fire. In the blink of an eye he had helped to destroy the foundation of trust they had been building. A few wrong words had caused his control of the situation to slide out of control completely.

He bowed his head in shame. "You're right, Akane. I am a jerk. I've had it all backwards, I don't deserve to be with you… not the other way around. I'm so sorry..." Balling his hand into a tight fist, he jumped over the house wall and ran down the street. His flight was useless, and he knew it. No matter how fast he ran, his knew his guilt would never tired and anguish would overtake him even if he ran halfway across the city.

{No more than five minutes after Mr. Tendo's talk, I go and mess things up! How could I be so stupid?!} He jumped onto a side street, clutching his head, wishing to the powers that be for the chance to rewind the last few minutes and redo them.

Watching from the side of the house as his son took off, Genma sighed and shook his head. "He's ruining all he's worked for. Children can be so foolish, eh, Tendo?"

Soun sighed sadly. "Youth isn't necessarily a virtue, it seems. I knew he wouldn't heed my advice as much as I wanted to believe otherwise. Oh well, it seems there is only one thing left to do!"

Genma nodded and pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. "Yes, we must bring Ranma back and fix this situation!"

Soun slapped him on the back. "Good of you to volunteer, Saotome!"

"What!?! Hey, why do I have to do it?!"

Soun's eyes narrowed. "Because he's your son!"

Genma folded his arms and almost seemed to pout. "You always say that! I fixed this problem the last time it happened!"

"Get moving! I'll handle Akane, you go after your son."

"Alright, alright! Arggg, leg cramp! Uh, let me just lay here for a second until I recover my strength."

Soun gave his life long friend a flat look and punted him into the air. "I'll help you catch up with him!"

***

"I'm such a fool!!! Damn it, damn it damn it!!!" Ranma slammed his fist into the river canal wall again and again, cracking it's sturdy frame. The pain that shot up his arm didn't even remotely compare to the grief that was eating him alive inside. The venomous words he had used to hurt Akane so badly played over and over in his mind, torturing him to no end.

"I am such an idiot!" He slammed his hand into the wall again with even greater force. When he withdrew it, blood dribbled from his bruised knuckles. He clutched his burning hand and howled at the sky. "Arghhh! Damn it!!! Why do I always mess things up!!?"

"Because your scared."

Ranma bristled and turned around. "Pop, it aint the time for this! Leave me alone!"

Genma shook his head. "Actually, I don't think there could possibly be a better time. You've come so far, Ranma. Why did you choke out?"

"Leave me alone!!!" Ranma ran up the slanted wall and disappeared into the streets once again. He didn't want a lecture, he didn't want to be reasoned with, and he didn't want to discuss the issue. That was all there was to it. Just looking at his father painfully reminded him how very similar they were in nature and he blanched visibly, feeling sick to his stomach. He did not wish to end up being like his father. And yet, it seemed be happening anyways. Perhaps there really was no way to fight against fate.

Genma watched in shock. "Hey, Boy! Get back here!!! I was just warming up for one of my great father-son talks!! Crap!" He took off after his son as fast as his short stocky legs would allow.

_____________________________

To escape his father, Ranma moved to the courtyard outside of Furinkan to further contemplate his screw up. His hand ached like hell, but he didn't care. In his depressed state, the pain somewhat atoned for what he had done. His mind reeled with possibilities and he felt dizzy. With a million different ways to handle a problem, he wondered why he always chose the worst of them.

Yes, he and Akane had fought before. Yes, Akane had called off their engagement when he had knowingly, and unknowingly, hurt her in the past. But he didn't want to hurt her! He hated hurting her more than anything. He was drawn to her, he wanted her more than anything, had thirsted to be with her even when he believed she meant nothing to him! The urge to just reach up and hold her in his arms was almost more than he could bare sometimes.

{How the hell am I going to fix this one?} He figured, amidst his self-inflicted guilt trip, that part of his attraction to her stemmed from their similar personalities. At that same time, that explained why they fought so much. They were both stubborn and hard headed, two of the key ingredients that made up confrontation. It was an interesting relationship they had, and more violent than either wanted it to be.

He almost smiled at that thought. They were indeed alike in more than one way. The bridge between them had been built through a common love of the martial arts, which their lives revolved around, albeit on different levels. Unfortunately, that bridge had fallen and been rebuilt almost every day over the last several years. If he could just watch his comments and if she could just watch her temper, a wonderful middle ground could be firmly established. He honestly believed that.

"But there might not be a next time to right these wrongs..." Ranma sighed. "She has no reason to forgive me this time. Mr. Tendo gave me some excellent advice and I just blew it! I failed. I always fail when it comes to my relationships with others. I'll always fail...." He leaned up against a tree and gazed depressingly out at the streets beyond.

He grimaced slightly, and sighed. "I hate feeling sorry for myself."

"I can see that you still have a lot of growing up to do. Boy." Genma jumped with surprising grace over the school wall and walked up to his son, pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. "Oh, wipe that depressed look off your face, it doesn't suit you. Ranma, you can't just get depressed and mope about! You're a man of action!"

Ranma turned his head to the side, feeling a bit more tolerant towards conversation than he had several moments ago. "Mr. Tendo brought up some very good points, Pop. I haven't exactly had the chance to grow up like a normal guy. I never really knew mom until she found out about my curse a few months back. I don't know how to act around people a lot of the time."

A long silence be felled them. Having nothing else to say, he turned to walk away, preparing to jump back over the wall.

Genma grabbed his son by his shoulder with surprising strength. "Boy, wait! Listen to me, and listen well! I admit I wasn't a good father at times. I shouldn't have separated you from Nodoka at such a young age, I know that now. However, that's no excuse for you to keep acting like a victim. It doesn't work in society, and that's a truth I myself had to realize as well. I know this much, if you continue on like this, feeling sorry for yourself and using you past as a copout, life and its opportunities will simply pass you by and then you really will lose your chance with Akane."

Ranma looked crestfallen but he tried to hide it. "Feh, as if I care."

Genma sighed. "You worry far too much about your masculinity and your public image. You've grown into a man, Ranma, act like it. We all know you love Akane so stop holding back the feelings you have for her! She's very sensitive about certain things and you have to be more gentle. Always remember, an inch of kindness will stretch a mile!"

Ranma smiled gently and shook his head. "And here I thought nothing you did could surprise me, Your far from noble enough to be lecturing me, and yet you really did bring the truth back to smack me in the face this time. Pop, I really messed up this time huh?"

Genma nodded sagely. "Damn straight! Now, go back home and cheer her up! Give her this when you apologize." Genma placed a red rose in his hand then stepped back, folding his arms.

Ranma looked down at the thorn-less rose and nodded. He didn't think a pep talk and rose would fix the situation he had caused, but it was certainly worth a shot. If Akane felt as deeply for him as Genma claimed, everything would be ok. Well, for better or worse he had to try to make up with her. He'd find out soon enough if success and good fortune would bless him again.

"Thanks pop, I won't let ya' down." Ranma took off running, jumping from rooftop to rooftop. In his hand he clutched the beautiful rose, the tool that would aid him in his battle for redemption. He did love Akane, and he always would. Now he had to show her, convince her! All he cared about was making things up to her, even if it cost him his pride.

Genma smiled slightly as Ranma disappeared from sight. "You do make me proud, Ranma. Go and follow your heart!"

At that moment his stomach chose to make him aware that it was hungry. Hopping back over the fence, Genma started off towards Ukyo's restaurant. "Wonder if I can get a free meal…"

***

Soun flagged Ranma down as he came skidding into the house. "Son! Quickly, come here!"

"What is it?" Ranma asked. He wanted to get past as quickly as possible. He had other business to attend to. Did Mr. Tendo plan on chewing his butt?

"Shhhh, Akane's asleep. Listen to me, I buried all of her… er, 'cookies' in the backyard." He pointed out to a small spot in the corner of the yard. The grass and bushes growing around it had turned a sickly shade of brown. As they watched, a small tree located near the burial site fell over on it's side, twitching in silent pain.

Soun pushed a pen and a piece of paper into his hands. "Quickly, write a note apologizing for what you did and convince her that you actually ate her food!"

Ranma quickly scratched out a message as ordered and folded the piece of paper neatly in half. "I hope she swallows it."

Soun placed the plate and piece of paper on the kitchen table directly underneath the empty cookie pan. "Don't worry, she'll believe it because she wants to believe it."

"Yeah..." Ranma turned to leave then stopped and shook his head. Grabbing the piece of paper, he tore it up and threw the paper in the trash can.

"Son, what are you doing?!" Soun asked in alarm.

"It's true I need to apologize and make up with her, Mr. Tendo. But I wont lie in order to do so. I'll do things my own way." With that, he walked out of the room.

Soun watched him go. "Son, where are you going?"

Ranma held the rose up for him to see. "I still have one last thing to do."

He walked up the stairs with determination under Soun and Nabiki's watchful gaze. He took a deep breath then knocked once on Akane's door but there was no response. He looked down at Soun who nodded him onward encouragingly. Gulping, he slowly opened the door and stepped inside, feeling as if he were invading enemy territory. Entering her room without permission had earned him her wrath on more than one occasion. One inside, he saw Akane sleeping on her bed, positioned on her side, facing the far wall. Stepping up to her quietly, he saw dampness on the sheets indicating she had cried herself to sleep. This realization only made him feel worse. Sighing heavily, he sat down on the edge of the bed with her and gently stroked her soft cheek. "Akane?"

She did not stir. Growing more bold, Ranma ran his hand through her short blue hair and gazed loving down at her peaceful face. For an endless moment, time itself stood still. He knew that only with her in a deep sleep could he truly be himself without fear or shyness. Maybe someday he could provide more but, for the moment, it was his only means in which to communicate his deepest sentiments.

"I know your asleep, Akane. I won't be long, but I have to say a few things. I want to make my peace at last. I'm not very good with emotional stuff, you and I both know that all too well. But still, I'm gonna' try real hard to fix that. Listen, I know I've been such a fool lately. I know you care about me… but, to be honest, I don't really think I deserve it."

He took a deep breath. "I care about you a lot too. Sometimes I feel like I'm going to burst from these strong feelings in my heart, but I've always kept quiet and hid it away in the back of my mind. Sometimes I tried to tell you, but the words never came out right. I guess I just hate feeling vulnerable. I didn't want to risk being rejected by you.

"I've said some very nasty stuff to you in the past that was undeserved. I want you to know I didn't mean any of it. I was just being childish.…"

He gazed at her beautiful face, peaceful in sleep. "Your so beautiful. I realize I've never told you that in a serious way before. I want you to do me a favor, k? Could you possibly... ya' know, give me another chance to do things right? We gotta' cut breaks for one another if we're going to get married one day and all… Oh, I know we'll still fight from time to time and problems will still roll our way, but as long as I can be with you, nothing will stop us."

He stared at the tear stains on her sheets. "I hate making you cry, Akane. Let's make a deal! Starting today, the pervert and the tomboy are gone! It's just you and me. I don't want Shampoo or Ukyo, or any of those other crazy girls. The truth, from the bottom of my heart, is that I only want you."

Blushing heavily, he ran out of words to say. He felt like an idiot, she couldn't even hear him and yet he felt compelled to spill his soul before her. "I uh, guess I'll go and let you keep sleeping. I just wanted to say what's been building up in my heart." He silently placed the rose in her hand and stood up.

Akane murmured something unintelligible in her sleep and rolled onto her back. Ranma looked down at her soft, inviting lips and decided to risk it all. Slowly, he brought his lips to hers for a brief, cautious kiss. The tender moment did not wake the slumbering girl and Ranma breathed a sigh of relief. He paused at her doorway and thought for a moment. Something still seemed to be missing, he was forgetting to say something.

Suddenly, he knew. He had forgotten to say the words he had wanted to tell her, the words he had come up here to say in the first place. "What I've been trying to get at is.... I'm sorry, Akane. Sleep well and have wonderful dreams." He closed the door quietly, smiling softly in her direction.

{Should I have told her I loved her?} No, he decided. It wasn't time to say those words to her. He had already taken a great step, no need to overdo it. Besides, he still felt he had a great deal of soul searching left to do before he made that proclamation, and when he did make it, it would be said to her directly, face to face. A great weight lifted from his heart like magic and he called out to Kasumi and asked her to bandage up his hand.

Smiling slightly, Akane opened her eyes a crack after her door shut and touched her lips, blushing slightly. "It's okay, Ranma. I guess I can forgive you. Your a total jerk at times, but your my jerk!" Reaching for her covers, she snuggled up against her pillow, sighing happily.

***

Outside of Furinkan, passing people took several cautious steps backwards as the ground rumbled and cracked beneath their feet. Concrete tore and entire sections of people were thrown back by an invisible field that sprung up out of nowhere. A large, black cloud signaled the arrival of the Shadow Warrior as he teleported back to Japan after a very long absence. He materialized in an instant from within the confines of these black clouds, touching his plated boots on the soil of the land he had come to hate so very much. Realizing where he was and how quickly his goal was to completion, he laughed manically, throwing raw energy away from himself with hellish glee. The onlookers fled from him in all directions, screaming with terror.

He raised his hand and summoned a fistful of energy, power he would use to crush the his last and greatest foe of all. "THIS ENERGY WILL KILL YOU, RANMA SAOTOME! MARK MY WORDS, TOMORROW WILL BE THE DAY YOU DIE!"