Romance Fan Fiction / Other Fan Fiction ❯ Cancer ❯ I'm (Not) Okay ( Chapter 2 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

A/N: All right, second chapter. God, I love Bert through out this whole chapter. He’s so.... Bert! XD
Anyways, Here’s the rest of your favorite story! (Or not.... I suck at writing anyway.) Who am I kidding? You probably don’t really like my stories. No one ever leaves any comments anymore. *cries* Anyways, back to the lovely story, in which all my inspiration comes from whatever I’m listening to at the time.
So here it is, Chapter two of Cancer: Two men who’ve lost all doubt in a chemical romance.
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The city– It was the one thing that made their homophobic town worth living in.

It was just so bright, and colorful. It was near to impossible to hate it. Of course, if you were color blind, or just blind in general, you probably wouldn’t like it, with all the loud noises, and the occasional traffic. But other than that, it was almost perfect.

Almost perfect, because the two young men weren’t there. Almost perfect because it was only full of super preppy, animal killing clothes stores. Almost perfect because it was almost as homophobic as their town.

But as they say, almost only counts in horseshoes and with Grenades.

Yes the young men always liked to say that they were the light of the town. They brought the love and the life into this city, and they brought the fans. Of course both their bands being not super pop smash hit bands, they didn’t bring many. But they still had fans, nonetheless.

Bands of that town usually only did covers, with a few possible original songs. But they were no My Chemical Romance. No MCR, as they like to say, was far more greater, coming up with a new album every two or so years. So far, they had I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love. And they had recently began writing their second album, Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge.

And now one might question the origin of this title. Where would it have come from? Gerard doesn’t seem to be a violent man, so what’s with the evil sounding title?

Well two meanings: One is when our good friend Gerard was back in High school, he was not the social butterfly, as you might say. He was a very lonely boy, who got drunk by himself, and his only friend was really his brother. He was picked on by everyone, and it really caused a lot of anger in him. But he never acted upon it. He was just too nice.

So he became obsessed with revenge. Hence the title.

But the other origin is supposed to be where their first album left off. When the two lovers from the song Demolition Lovers are able to be reunited, the devil says that the man has to kill all the evil men who killed his lover. So the Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge is quite literal, where they are literally encouraging this revenge, even though it’s pretty brutal.

And there the other reasoning of the title has revealed itself.

Of course Gerard was amped up for this, as they were to play a few new songs at their concert. Especially Helena, which of course was written in the memory of his late Grandmother, Elena Lee Rush, but of course all her friends called her Helena.

Ah yes, another title concept. Gerard is quite the clever one, no?

Anyways, to get back to the men in the city.

The two men always had a ritual when they entered this city. They ate at restaurants, they smoked, and they drank. Maybe they’d throw in some gambling, to mix things up a bit.

And tonight was no different, other than the fact that Gerard had a show to do, so they might have to cut their activities short tonight. But of course Bert would have something planned for later on in the night, if you know what I mean. And of course Gerard’s ever-so handsome friends would be joining them, but only for the first half of the night’s plans, not the second half.

No, that part was specifically for Gerard, and Bert wouldn’t have it any other way. For he just didn’t know life without Gerard. There was a time he had fallen in love with someone else, but she died, just before Bert was going to propose to her. He said after that, he wouldn’t fall in love again.

And then he met Gerard.

Once he met Gerard, his life completely changed. He stopped being depressed all the time, and began life anew. He was a new man, a better man, even if he still had the same old bad habits. But Gerard had changed him.

Gerard had saved his life. And Bert didn’t know if Gerard knew that. But he did.

For the week after that blonde haired beauty died, he felt he couldn’t make it on his own. He felt that life wasn’t worth living. He was going to kill himself. He had even planned the date, and set up the method. A gun shot to the back of the head, after an overdose. But of course the gun was only for if he didn’t die instantly from the pills. And the time he met Gerard, he had been going to buy the pills for his “accidental overdose”, as they would’ve called it.

Yes, Gerard helped save the sad and lonely man. And Gerard saved him from drowning in himself, for that’s what would’ve happened had he survived his horror, because he knew something would’ve gone wrong, and his overdose would’ve screwed up. And god knows that Bert can’t touch a gun without freaking out. It was his hidden fear, that he never wanted to reveal to anybody.

But god knows he wouldn’t of touched a gun, but had it been serious enough, he would’ve gone to the extreme, only for his lovely Katie.

And everyday Bert thanked god for his accidental run in with Gerard. Even if it had been planned, he thanked the lord every single day for Gerard, like millions of other kids.

“Gerard, do you have any cigarettes? Because we can just go buy some more at the store.” Bert asked his dear Gerard, hoping he would have some. Bert needed a cigarette, like a fat kid at fat camp needed a cheeseburger.

Or it was more a want, as he truly didn’t need the cigarettes he craved ever-so desperately for. It was all just an addiction.

An addiction which he couldn’t beat. Even if it did kill his lover, he couldn’t fight it. It was the one thing that kept him up crying at nights. And it was really the one thing that could break the man in two. His frustration with it was endless, but he rarely showed any emotion towards the subject in public.

But of course it was to his dismay that Gerard replied, “No, I’m sorry. I finished my last one last night.” Gerard said, checking his wallet for money. He began to take out a ten dollar bill, when Bert put his hand over the man’s wallet.

“No, they’re on me, Gee. Don’t worry about it.” He told him. Gerard smiled, that ever so adorable smile that could captivate millions with it’s gorgeousness. It WAS Gerard’s best quality, though.

“Thanks, babe. I love you.” He said, kissing Bert’s neck sweetly. He bit Bert’s flesh a little, making the younger man give a soft moan. Bert smiled, feeling himself enjoying every moment of Gerard’s seductive play. Once Gerard stopped, Bert pouted.

“Oh, I was enjoying that. NOW you wanna get kinky.” Bert said, putting his hand on his hip. Gerard just smiled, and rested his head on Bert’s shoulder. “Well buy us some cigarettes, and maybe I’ll just be in the mood for more...” Gerard whispered seductively.

Of course this got Bert’s attention, as he rushed in, and bought the two three packs of cigarettes, hoping the more he bought, the better the sex. But of course that was just Bert being... Well, Bert.

And of course that was Gerard teasing his lover. It was just his way. I mean, he’s still got at least another thirty more years that he gets to share this world with this man, so why not play around with him. And who knows? Maybe they’d get married. And of course, Gerard planned on that happening. But not in their homophobic town.

Probably England, because they are so forgiving. And because they happen to have friends in England, that could totally hook them up, so a wedding wouldn’t be so far-fetched for the two. Besides, they’ll be famous soon, so nothing is impossible for them.
Once Bert came running out, he handed Gerard a pack of cigarettes. “Now, where’s my sex?” Bert asked, like a dog begging for food. Gerard just laughed.

“You little sex hound. Is that all you think about? Sex?” Gerard asked, shrugging. “I guess that’s why everyone loves you. Because your mind is so warped, you think of sex twenty four seven.”

But now it was Bert’s turn to turn on Gerard. “Well, from the way you were talking, it sounds like you were only thinking of sex, being you said it like five times that whole sentence.” He said, now smirking. “And I’m the fiend?” Gerard just blushed. “Shut up.”

Bert laughed once again at Gerard’s embarrassed expression. But it only added to Gee’s new found terror. Bert stopped laughing, once he saw that Gerard was glaring daggers at him.

“I’m sowwy Gee. Can you eber fowgive me?” Bert asked, giving him a childish face, to fit the childish voice.

Gerard smiled, seeing Bert’s adorable face. “Oh Bert, I could never be mad at you, you’re too cute.” Gerard said, hugging Bert. Bert took advantage of his nearness to Gerard. He kissed the man tenderly on the neck, and bit at Gerard, as the older man had done to him. Gerard shivered with excitement. “Come on Bert, let’s stop this for a minute, and go somewhere nicer.” Gerard told him. Bert nodded, and followed his lover.

Of course, he would follow Gerard into the dark, if that’s what it took to be with him. And he wouldn’t be with just anyone. Gerard was really his first experience with guys, except for that one whole experience in summer camp with that other Mormon kid, who thought he’d never get the chance to do that with anyone else. But, uh, that’s a story he never wishes to relive. He shuddered at the sheer thought of it.

But of course Gerard’s idea of ‘A better place’ was a Starbucks coffee shop.

“This is your idea of a better place? This is probably worse! A blind person could find us a better place than this!” Bert said, obviously not pleased with Gerard’s idea.

But of course he had something to say to that. “Well, how do you expect me to meet my friends, if we all planned to meet here? Besides, we can sit in the corner, isolated. Nobody likes the corner.” Gerard responded, still peppy and bright as before.

And of course just as before, Bert couldn’t stay mad. He could never get mad at his Gerard. So he followed him over to the isolated corner, in which Bert continued to make out with his ever so lovely Gerard.

And obviously Gerard didn’t object, just as long as he had gotten his coffee first. Or maybe some booze. Which was probably the better alternative, as Gerard needed to be completely drunk before a show. It was just his way to do things. Everyone had their way.

Frank liked to lift weights before a show, Ray liked to do jumping jacks, and then run in circles for a few minutes, Bob liked to play air drums, and then smack Frank in the head for bothering him, Mikey liked to sleep. They all had their little quirks that made them tick. But the one thing they all had in common was they loved what they did.

But who wouldn’t? You grow up loving music your whole life, and now you have the opportunity to play it with your best friends? Of course you would take the offer! Frank and Mikey even gave up school to pursue this dream they had.

And it was definitely worth it. Obviously with the new record they were putting out, they were definitely on the right track. They did have a lot of fans, despite only having one record out. It was a lot for the guys, and sometimes, they never knew what would happen to them, with all this fame on their backs.

But that’s a story for another day. For right now, Bert and Gerard were almost in a completely passionate make out session, in which Bert seemed to be the dominate one. And Gerard didn’t object at all. He in fact quite liked it that way. It got really awkward if Gerard controlled the whole situation. He never had any idea what to do.

“Mmm.... Bert? Bert? Wait a minute. I gotta get some booze. Mmm... Bert?” Gerard mumbled through the kisses of Bert, trying to get up.

But Bert kept a good grip on Gerard, and said, “No wait, let me get for you, in a minute....” He sighed, keeping his same furious kisses on Gerard. He never wanted to let go of Gerard, and never wanted him to leave.

“Mmmhmm.... Bert! Wait. I.... need to see if......” But Gerard’s sentence was cut off by Bert nipping the man’s ear seductively. It caused another soft moan, this time from Gerard. That was when Gerard decided to stop fighting him, and just let Bert go crazy. He brought his fingers through Bert’s hair, and let them get lost within it.

And then they heard the sound of an impatient cough come from behind them. The two looked up. It was Frank, Ray, Bob, and Mikey, who all shared similar looks of shock on their faces. Except Mikey, who smiled at his brother, and waved.

Gerard and Bert just looked at each other with terror, as none of My Chemical Romance had known that Bert and Gerard were in that kind of relationship. They thought it was more friendly, and less sexual.

So of course they were all surprised to see Bert on top of Gerard, making out inside a coffee shop. It was all too much for the men to handle. It was silent between the men until Mikey blurted out, “Hey Gerard, why is Bert kissing you like that?” A question a child would ask, if he had seen his parents in bed.

Gerard just groaned in mental agony. Frank turned to Mikey, smacked him in the head, and told him, “Shut up Mikey.” Mikey just rubbed his “wound”, as he shut his mouth.
“Guys, please don’t keep silent, you scare me when you do that.” Gerard said, obviously not liking this one bit. But still his friends kept quiet. Even Mikey kept still, though he longed to go get a nice cup of coffee. It taunted him, but even through that he stayed still, lest he get another beating from Frank.

Gerard, who seemed like he was about to cry, just sighed, and put his head down on the table. Gerard tried to hold back the tears, but they began to flow as his friends began to walk away.

And when Bert saw those tears, things got messy.

“What’s so wrong with us being in love? Huh? There is nothing more fucking beautiful than love, and if you fuckers don’t want to believe in it, then fine. But don’t you dare go and reduce a man to tears with your cruel stares. We get enough of that fucking shit back home, so don’t you think you guys, people that we called friends, could be a little more supportive?” Bert asked them. But then he turned around and shrugged. “But then again, you can’t trust any old fucker these days. Everyone here’ll turn on you like that.” He snapped his fingers for emphasis. And then he continued his rant.

“I bet if any one of you guys one day woke up and said, ‘You know, I think I’ve fallen in love with a guy.’ I bet you’d feel shitty about right now then. For you’ve reduced a sweet and sensitive gay man into tears, from just not being supportive. You’d want support if you were him, right?” He asked, leaving them to feel bad, as they hung their heads down low. “Right?” He asked, somewhat louder, just to make their guilt rise. They all nodded, feeling really low, and pretty shitty.

Gerard just looked up, his tears now subsiding, as Bert stood up for him. He smiled, and was proud of Bert. He then sat up a little more, sticking his head on top of his hands.

Bert, seeing Gerard smiling, sat right next to him, and put his arms around him. He kissed Gerard’s cheek, and said, “I love you Gerard.”

Gerard just smiled back, and said, “I love you too, Bert McCracken. I hope we never ever lose each other.” He said, putting his head on Bert’s shoulder. He said it in such a way, that it seemed childish, yet Bert knew he meant every word.

Bert smiled. “Me too, Gee, me too.” He kissed Gerard playfully on the lips. Then Gerard’s serious face arose, as he whispered into Bert’s ear, “Thanks for saving my life again... I don’t know what I would’ve done to myself if you hadn’t of said that.”

This made Bert shocked, and worried. A-a-again? What does he mean by that? He asked himself, as he lover playfully teased him. But he sat there, not even bothering to move, as Gerard’s words still hung in his mind, drifting about, replaying over and over.

This worried Gerard. “Bert? Bert, are you okay? You’re not responding.” He asked. Bert shook off the feeling, and said, “Yeah Gerard, I’m fine....” But the question is, are you?
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A /N: All right here’s the second Chapter! It was supposed to include them getting drunk, going to the concert, and then whatever was including in between, but it began getting to long for me. But, *sigh* I love Bert. I have the feeling he would stick up for Gerard, if someone was being like they were. But, oh well. Next chapter will be up shortly, as I’ve recently found myself addicted to typing. So, be excited for the next chapter. Byeeee!