Romance Fan Fiction / Other Fan Fiction ❯ Cancer ❯ Whatsername ( Chapter 6 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

A/N: Okay, so you are all loving my story now, right? Especially all the Berard fan girls out there. Well, the romantics are done for today, but there might be more later. Don’t you worry, I aim to please you all. I am just your writing slave, only around to write stories that please you all. Okay, so now that’s out of the way, we can get on with Chapter six of Cancer: two men who’ve lost all doubt in a chemical romance.
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The next morning, Gerard awoke to Bert’s head on top of his. His eyes opened to the sea of black messy hair, which was completely tangled. And it wasn’t the best smelling thing either.

So once he woke up, he almost gagged. “Oh god! When was the last time he washed his hair?” He asked sitting up. “A week and a half ago.” Bert said, sitting up too. Gerard almost jumped when Bert spoke. “You’re awake?!” He yelled, frightened.

Bert just laughed, and scratched his head. “Yeah, I woke up a few hours ago. But you were so cute. I wanted to wait for you to wake up.” He said, smiling. Gerard laughed nervously, as he hoped Bert didn’t take offense to the comment on his hair. “Sorry about the comment on the hair.” Gerard said, looking down nervously.

Bert giggled. “It’s fine. I don’t care what people think about it anyways. That’s why I act like I do.” Bert said, being surprisingly serious. “As long as I’m loved by a certain person, then I’m okay with being this dirty old guy.” He laughed.

Gerard smiled. “You’re not an old guy. I’m old. Thirty’s much older than twenty four.” He told him, sitting next to his lover. He kissed Bert on the cheek. “But you’re right. You have the love of one certain person forever. No matter who you are, or what you do, I’ll love you. Never stop being the crazy, dirty guy.” He told Bert, putting his head on Bert’s shoulder.

“Because that dirty, crazy guy is the sexiest man on the planet.” Gerard whispered into Bert’s ear. Bert smiled, and turned to kiss Gerard. He playfully pecked Gerard, and then stood up.

He gathered up his clothes, remembering that he was completely naked from last nights events. And then he smelled himself. “Ugh. I reek. Wanna shower?” He asked Gerard. Gerard nodded enthusiastically, excited to see Bert actually wanting a shower.

“Actually, I reek too. Probably from last night.” Gerard said, smelling himself. He ran to the bathroom, and turned on the water. The shower, which was big enough to fit the two men, also doubled as a bath tub. A romantic one, too. So of course this was exciting for Gerard.

But t was also a great experience for Bert, who had never been in a Jacuzzi tub before. “Wow!” He exclaimed entering the room. “I’ve never seen something so cool.” Bert said, staring at the tub. Gerard smiled. “You’ve never seen something like this? You must’ve been a deprived person growing up.” Gerard said, walking over to Bert.

Bert nodded. “Growing up, we were given blocks of wood, and told to make our own toys. I actually made my first guitar, because dad didn’t want to buy one for me. He said ‘Music is the devil, and you’re going to hell if you get one.’ Guess I’m burning in hell.” Bert said, with a heavy sigh. Gerard put his hand on Bert’s shoulder.

But then Bert smiled, and said, “But hey, let’s not think of that. I just wanna get in that tub. Seriously. You don’t want a guy like me after not showering for two weeks.” Bert said, laughing at himself. Gerard looked at him pathetically. “I’d want you even if you never showered.” Gerard said. Bert rolled his eyes not believing it. “Seriously? Do you know how bad I get after sweating after a daytime concert? It’s really bad, man.” Gerard said, as Bert got into the tub. Gerard followed suit, and sat down on the little bench next to Bert.

Bert took a bottle of beer that he had taken from the fridge before he entered, and opened it. He gulped some down, and looked at gerard, who sat begging for it like a child whining for it’s bottle. Bert laughed, and handed Gerard the bottle. Gerard sucked it down, and then wanted more. Bert was worried.

Gerard can be pretty odd when he drinks, should I give him more? Bert asked himself. But when he saw Gerard’s expression of sadness from lack of booze, he had to give in. He handed Gerard the second bottle. He sighed, and relaxed back into the tub. Gerard smiled at Bert, and sat up straight. He took some bath stuff that Mikey had given him one year for Christmas, and opened it.

It smelled like cherry blossoms, which Gerard knew was Bert’s favorite flower smell. He poured some into his hand, and while Bert’s eyes were closed, he started rubbing it on Bert. Bert opened his eyes, and was surprised to see Gerard washing him. He smiled when he smelled it, though. “Cherry blossoms? It’s your favorite smell, right?” Gerard asked. Bert shook his head. “My favorite smell is your smell.”He said seductively. Gerard blushed, and kept washing him.

Finally, he got to Bert’s hair. He took out some shampoo, and started to rub Bert’s scalp, wanting badly to know what Bert’s hair would be like if it was all nice and washed. So he worked hard on it, and eventually it smelled surprisingly nice. He then poured conditioner on his head, and throughly applied it. It made his hair so silky and smooth that Gerard had a hard time believing that it was Bert’s hair.

It felt orgasmic to Gerard to be running his fingers through the super soft hair. “My god Bert. You never told me you had such great hair....” Gerard said.

Bert laughed. “I never told you a lot of things.” He said, smirking. “Like how I’ve had ass-sex before.” He said, beginning to drink another bottle of beer. Gerard stopped what he was doing to look at Bert. “How many times?” He questioned. “Six.” Gerard’s mouth opened. “What?!” He exclaimed, shocked. Bert just laughed, tilting his head backwards to emphasize his enjoyment.

Gerard sighed. “No wonder you have the shirt ‘Butt sex is itchy’. I was gonna ask how you knew the first time I saw you in it.” Gerard said, washing out Bert’s hair. He sighed, looking at the beauty of his work. Bert just whimpered. “But now my hair doesn’t have a rock smell....” He said with a fake sadness. Gerard punched his shoulder. “It smells better this way.” He told Bert, as he went to snuggle him.

“Besides, we’re going to go visit Cassie. I promised her I’d visit. Frankie’s coming over too.” Gerard said, finally relaxing. “What time is Frank coming?” Bert asked, putting his arm around Gerard.

He smiled. “Frank said about 12:30. What time is it now?” Gerard asked. Bert looked over at the clock. “12:35.” He said simply.

Gerard’s eyes snapped open. “WHAT?!” He exclaimed, almost jumping out of the tub. Bert giggled at Gerard. “Don’t worry, he’s not late though. He’s right there, in the doorway.” Bert said, pointing over to the open door.

Frank stood, blushing at the fact that he barged in on his best friend naked in the tub. “Uh.... Please tell me you didn’t do what I think you did last night.” Frank said, covering his eyes with his hand. Gerard laughed nervously. “Eh... We didn’t NOT do what you’re not thinking we didn’t do.” Gerard said, hoping to confuse the topic away from his interest.

Frank just stood there, his brain short-circuiting. “He means we had sex.” Bert said, being blunt. Gerard sighed, and put his hand over his face. “Why do I date you?” He asked Bert, more talking to himself. Bert looked up at him. “‘Cuz you love me? ‘Cuz we have mad crazy sex?” Bert asked, hoping to get the right answer. Gerard just rolled his eyes. “You’re worse than Mikey....” Bert smiled happily, standing up to go get his clothes.

Frank just turned away. “Uhh....” Frank looked over at Gerard. Gerard just held up his hand. “Don’t say anything Frank.” He sighed.

“Just don’t say anything.”


Bob and Cassie woke up, and realized they still had the barricade against the door. That wasn’t such a good move, considering that was the only door for them to escape from if there ever was a fire.

Cassie woke up first, hearing one of the nurse’s screaming for them to open the door. “Shit.” She whispered. She nudged Bob, and when he ignored her, she punched him. “Oww! What was that for?” He asked, rubbing his arm.

She smiled. “You need to put pants on.” She told him. He looked down, and realized that there was nothing on him, and he blushed, remembering the previous night. “Oh yeah.” He said, embarrassed. Cassie handed him his pants, and smiled as he hurriedly tried to put them on, failing miserably, then giving up with that.

Cassie, picking up the pants, said, “Let me try.” She unzipped the pants, something Bob should’ve tried, then pulled them up his legs, which were very smooth. “Hmm. It’s odd for a guy to have smooth legs.” She looked up at him, and then back down at his legs, pulling up the pants all the way. “Then again, it’s odd for a guy to have to be dressed by the girl he just had sex with.” She laughed at her own joke.

Bob laughed embarrassed. “Uhh, yeah, about that....” He said, trying to defend himself. “I can’t do it right now, cuz I’m so shaky. I would’ve done it fine any other time.” He said. Cassie laughed. “Sure you would’ve.”

He glared at her, but then smiled. “I love you.” He told her, grabbing her arm. She smiled. “Me too.” She said, going up to kiss him, but then realizing that same nurse from before was still out there. “Oh yeah, forgot about that.....” She sighed, the nurse ruining her moment. She quickly got her clothes on, and took the chair from the door. Then she opened the door to a new nurse, and Mary, the nurse from earlier.

“Oh my god! I thought that you both were trapped. You scared the living hell out of me.” The new nurse, her name tag said Sarah, said exasperated. Mary just looked at her nails. “They probably had sex.” She said. Bob and Cassie looked at each other, and then at Mary. Had she figured out what they did last night?

Sarah just gasped. “How dare you accuse this young girl of such actions! They’re both clothed, so they must’ve not done anything.” Sarah, a natural blonde, said. Mary rolled her eyes. “You stupid bitch.” She sighed.

“Well, I came here to tell you that you’ve got some visitors coming later, so be ready.” Sarah said, remembering her purpose. She left, but just stared at Mary, looking at her like she was insane. Mary rolled her eyes. “God, she’s dumb.” Mary said. Cassie laughed.

Mary just stood there, looking around the room. “Hmm.... You two did have sex, right?” She asked, getting to the point. Cassie blushed, but nodded. Mary smiled, showing off her perfectly straight white teeth. “I knew it. I had a feeling you did.” Mary laughed. She walked around the room, and pointed out the fact that the stench of the room was different. It didn’t smell like the hospital smell she was used to, so she knew it.

Cassie blushed, not realizing how easy it was to tell. “That easy, huh?” She asked, hoping that Gerard wouldn’t notice when he came back. Mary shook her head. “No, I just am a real geek.” She laughed. Cassie and Bob laughed too. “Hey, you like FOB, right?” Cassie asked Mary, who instantly looked up, hearing the mention of the band. “Yeah! How’d you know?” She asked. “Bob told me.” Cassie said, pointing to the lovely man behind her on the bed.

Mary smiled. “Hi Bob.” She waved, and giggled nervously. Bob looked confused, but said, “Hi.” Cassie smiled, and told Mary to sit down.

She did as she was commanded.

After a brief period of awkward silence, Mary asked Cassie a question. “So... You know Bob right? What other members do you know? Have you met Mikey?” She asked. Cassie looked around. “Uhh.... Not really....” She said, kind of nervous. Bob added, “He’s coming to visit today.” Mary gasped. “I hate you!” She said, turning away dramatically. Then she turned around smiling. “Nah, just kidding, you’re cool.”

“So, do you know Gerard?” She asked, excitedly. Cassie smiled. “Mmmhmm. I met him yesterday. He’s coming back today.” “OMG! I hate you!” Mary turned away again. But she came back smiling. “Nahh. Just joking. You’re awesome.” Cassie laughed nervously. “Ooh! What about Frankie? Do you know Frankie?” Mary asked excitedly. Cassie turned to Bob. “He’s coming to visit too.” Bob said.

Mary’s jaw went wide. “Eek! I hate you now! Seriously, I do.” She said, turning away, pouting. Cassie and Bob looked at each other, then back to reddish-brown haired nurse. She then turned back to then with an even bigger grin. “Nahh, I’m kidding. But I am wildly jealous. I love Frankie.” She said, losing herself in her mind.

Cassie looked at her. “Well, you’re uh welcome to join us here. I’m sure the guys won’t mind meeting you...” She told Mary. Mary instantly perked up. “Really?!” She asked. Cassie nodded. “Sure. They won’t mind. Just as long as you can stand my friends who’ll be coming too. Trust me, they’re big MCR fans. You’ll probably shoot yourself after ten minutes of Catie’s high pitched shrieking.” (A/N: Catie, please don’t hurt me...) Cassie laughed, knowing Catie’s reaction would be loud.

Sarah popped her head in, to check up on them. “Mary! I need you to help me with something! What’s five times ten?” Sarah asked. Mary slapped her hand against her forehead, indicating that Sarah was giving her a headache. “Fifty, Sarah.” Mary sighed. “Oh yeah! I could of thought of that myself. Why didn’t I?” She asked. Mary sighed. “Cuz you’re an idiot!” She yelled at her. Sarah just looked at her. “Well, someone’s cranky.” Sarah said, before leaving.

Mary smiled, and said, “As long as they’re nothing like Sarah, I’m good.”



Finally, after getting fully clothed and ready, the boys left the apartment. This time, Gerard told Bert where the key was. The lineup today was Mikey, Gerard, Bert, and Frank. Ray was missing from the group, because he was visiting his girlfriend, and wouldn’t be able to join them until later.

The men first decided to go into the nearest food store and buy a few treats for the poor girl. Of course they ended up coming out with booze, but they did have the girl in mind. They had bought candy for her, as they did feel slightly guilty for not listening to Bob. And that ultimately led to the girl’s pain.

And so they were on their way to the hospital, drinking, laughing, and having fun. But that fun had to end when they got to the hospital. Because it wasn’t just the six of them there. It was a whole place full of people who wanted to sleep, wanted to have conversations with their families, and just wanted peace and quiet. So with that said, how would our boys have fun in a drab, dry, and boring place such as this, without making too much noise?

They’ll find a way. After all, they do have Bert McCracken, probably the oldest child that has ever been alive. And Mikey, a man who grew up, but has the mind of a child. So of course, things would all work out to there benefit.

There they stood, in front of the hospital doors, gaping. It was something about the bright light that came from inside, that captivated them, making them stare blankly ahead, making them afraid to go in. Though it was broad daylight, the hospital still shone brightly.

None of them had the courage to walk in, because of it’s brightness. But the heat soon got to them, and they were left with no other option, but to go in. And it was Gerard leading the pack. He was their leader, he was their savior. They’d protect him from the blinding lights, and would bring the darkness to the place. And that place needed a touch of darkness.

So they plunged headfirst into the bright-lit hospital, to go visit the poor little girl, who none of them even knew the name of. The only time they’d actually even heard of her name was when Bob fell screaming to the floor. But that time had been mixed with Bob’s sobs. (A/N: =D It rhymes. :3) They honestly had no idea who they were visiting. But it didn’t matter that they had no clue, because it made a fan of theirs happy.

As long as the fans were happy, then they were happy.

It was a great way to live, right? Keeping your fans happy to keep you happy? What a sweet way to live your life. You definitely get a plus one in the afterlife with that kind of lifestyle. (A/N: FOB quotes!)

But back to the hospital.

In they walked to her room,, bearing gifts of friendship and forgiveness. Cassie took them eagerly, as it’s not every day that your heroes ask you to be their friend. So with her grey-blue eyes shining, she warmly accepted the men.

And thus the intros began.

“Well, you obviously know who we are, but who are you?” Bert asked, not fully remembering the girl’s face. She smiled. “Well, I’m Cassie Lee Christian, and it’s such an honor to meet you guys. I’m such a fan. I have all your records. I’ve even visited the studios to see you guys record. I work at one of them. You are so amazing!” She gushed, going on about how amazing and awesome they are. The men just stood there, blushing.

“Aww, thanks. But really, you don’t have to compliment us twenty four seven.” Gerard said, a small smile on his face. Cassie blushed from embarrassment. “Oh, I’m sorry. I’m such an idiot....” She said, now stopping further embarrassment.

They all stood in silence, Cassie feeling embarrassed that they all came to visit her and leaving them with nothing to do. Bob looked at her, and knew she was upset. He didn’t want to see her embarrassed, so he tried to strike up some conversation. “So.... Cassie, when are your friends coming?” Bob asked, hoping to make the girl a little more talkative.

Cassie looked up at the clock. “Oh shit. They’ll be here in about fifteen minutes.” Cassie said, remembering her friends were coming. “Oh god. You guys better leave before they get here. They’ll seriously rape you.” Cassie warned, looking mainly at Gerard. Gerard gulped. But Bert growled. “They go anywhere near my Gerard, they die.” He said, defensively getting in front of Gerard.

Gerard rolled his eyes. “Save that kind of energy for bed, Bert.” He said, pushing away the man. Gerard sat down on the edge of the bed. Bert pouted, and curled up on the edge of the bed, placing his head into Gerard’s lap. (Mind you, Gerard is wearing tight pants.) “But I wuv you, sexy.” Bert said, looking up at him with puppy eyes.

Which immediately caused a major disturbance in his pants.

Bert smiled, and sat up. He whispered in Gerard’s ear, “Someone’s happy.” Gerard instantly looked down, and shrieked. “Eep!” He jumped up, and fell backwards, causing everyone to laugh. Even Bert laughed at Gerard’s fall. “Aww, Gee! Lighten up. So what if people see your boner. It doesn’t matter.” Bert said, helping Gerard up.

Gerard still blushed furiously, embarrassed that Bert blurted it out in front of everyone. “Thanks for announcing it to the world, Bert.” Gerard looked coldly at him. But Bert looked at him, the smile fading. “Oh, you want me to tell the world? I can go do that if you want.” He said, running out of the room. “Bert no!” He said, chasing after the younger and faster man.

But he was already in the lobby, with a smile on his face. “Hey, everyone! Gerard has a boner!” He announced, leaving Gerard to blush furiously. He stormed over to Bert, removed him from the table he stood on, and rushed them back to Cassie’s hospital room.

Once they were at the door, Gerard shut it, and then stood outside with Bert for a talk. “Do you know how childish that was? Mikey behaves better than you! And Mikey has the mind of a depressed seven year old.” Gerard said, using the example of his brother’s odd personality as an example. Bert grinned. “Are ya proud of me Gee? I announced it like you told me too.” He said, smiling. Gerard sighed, and put his hand over his eyes.

“This is going to be a LONG day.” He sighed.

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A/N: Did you enjoy the new chapter? Sorry it took so long, I went on vacation for a bit, and yeah. So please feel free to comment, I will take everything I hear into great consideration. But if you’re mean, I won’t like you too much. XP Anyways, the next chapter’ll be up soon. Bye!