Ronin Warriors Fan Fiction ❯ Hidden feelings ❯ Chapter 1 ( Chapter 1 )

Welcome on to the beginning of my very first Yaoi history. I hope that you will like the first chapter and that it will give you desire for reading the continuation.
If you have comments or suggestions, do not hesitate.
I dedicate this chapter to Wildfire's Flame which required of me to put it in English.

Hidden feelings
By Luna

Chapter 1

Touma looked by the window. The rain streamed on the pane and the lapping of water on the edge of the window put rhythm into his chaotic thoughts. The archer was remembering his past.

Touma had left Japan and had settled in the United States, in Boston, for almost six months. He had come there to continue his studies, but it wasn't the only reason, because he could very well have been done them in Japan.

The reason which had made him leave was a person and not any person, since it was his best friend, Seiji.

A few times before making this decision, Seiji had announced to him that he was going to marry, not by love but by obligation towards his family. This news had made him aware of something, a thing which he knew was hidden at the bottoms of himself, but that he didn't want to admit. The feelings which he had for the blond.

He knew very well that Seiji would announce this news to him one day or another, but he would have never believed that he would react the way he did. A long time ago, they had a discussion on the subject. The family of Seiji was very strict about their traditions and according to these traditions, he should marry to a girl who his family would have chosen for him. Obviously Seiji was against this, but he didn't have a choice.

After several days, the archer had noticed that the behavior of his friend had changed. Seiji had become distant with everyone and especially with Touma. In one month, they hadn't almost spoken to each other.

Touma couldn't stand it any longer. He needed to be able to speak with his best friend. He wanted everything to be normal again, like before, but he knew that it wouldn't be possible any more. Everything began to change. When Seiji is married, he will have to leave the manor of Nasuty and all the troopers as well. Their friendship which bounded them will not be the same any more.

The blue haired boy had been thinking about it a lot, and he understood that he couldn't put up will the situation any more. He couldn't bear seeing Seiji married and sad not to be able to live the life he wished to live.

One day, he had taken advantage of the fact that Nasuty and the boys were all together one morning for breakfast to announce his decision to leave. He had explained that studying in the United States would enable him to be closer to his father, who made research in astronomy.

A great silence had filled the room, until Seiji briskly left to take refuge in the room which he shared with Touma.

Touma had joined him at once and had found him sitting on his bed, leaning ahead, his head between his hands. The archer had knelt in front of him and Seiji had raised the head to look at him. His eyes were dimmed with tears. Touma had a pinching in his heart, he then put a hand on the shoulder of the blond. Against all expections, Seiji threw himself in his arms. Touma didn't know what to say and tightened his arms around Seiji.

During the days which followed the announcement, Touma organized his departure, while his friends had prepared a small good-bye party for him.

After the party, Seiji had insisted to take Touma to the airport. Once there, the two friends were unable to say anything at all to each other. When Touma's plane was anounced, Touma had taken Seiji in his arms to say goodbye and had whispered to him in his ear "I love you, Seiji." Seiji didn't' have the time to react before Touma moved away, and waved before getting into the plane.

Each time Touma reconsidered these moments, he couldn't help sobbing.

"Why did I tell him that I loved him ? I messed everthing up." He murmured.

***

Seiji meditated in the forest. The absence of Touma weighing on him too much, much more than this marriage which was approaching.

Since the archer had told him that he loved him, he felt lost. He had never thought of Touma in this way. It's true that their friendship was very strong and that they were very close indeed, but since Touma's departure, nothing between them was the same.

Touma had called him a few days afterwards, but they hadn't discussed what had occurred, and then never spoke about it. Seiji would have liked to talk about it, but never had the courage to do so.

It had been a month since they had last called each other. The blond didn't have the courage and apparently neither Touma.

Seiji came back to the house and made himself comfortable in the living room, where he was joined by Nasuty. She sat down beside him and looked at him with a worried look.

"Are you ok, Seiji ? You are a little pale."
"I'm ok. I worry about Tou... Eh I mean about the marriage."

Nasuty laughed gently.

"I don't believe you when you say that you worry about the marriage. Actually, you almost never speak about it. I'm not blind, I have noticed that since Touma's departure you aren't the same any more. Tell me what happened and don't lie to me, because I will see it immediately."
"He told me that he loved me... " Seiji blushed slightly and his hands started to tremble.
"And you, what do you feel for him ?"
"I don't know, I don't know any more." He said as he felt tears in his eyes.
"I don't think so, I believe that you know perfectly well, only you don't want you to admit it... "
"But, Nasuty, you don't seem surprised about what I have just said to you," questioned Seiji.
"In fact, Touma had told me about it before leaving." Nasuty said as she got up and left the room.

***

To be continued…