Rurouni Kenshin Fan Fiction ❯ The Reason ❯ The Reason ( Chapter 1 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: YamiPaladinOfChaos 
Everyone has a reason for going on. Kenshin's reason is the woman he killed. (Songfic to The Reason)
Anime/Manga: Rurouni Kenshin Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 05.07.2005 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.1K | Visits: 486 | Status: Completed
Everyone has a reason for going on. Kenshin's reason is the woman he killed. (Songfic to The Reason)
Anime/Manga: Rurouni Kenshin Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 05.07.2005 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.1K | Visits: 486 | Status: Completed
Disclaimer- I don’t own Rurouni Kenshin or The Reason.
(I'm not a perfect personThere are many things I wish I didn't do)
“I’m sorry Tomoe.”
The words seem so hollow, standing here, above your grave. How can two words possibly tell of the grief, the suffering, the utter agony of knowing that I knowing I killed your happiness and then you.
Oh, if I could pull back those two fatal strokes. If I could have taken a different path, never let you see me at my morbid work. I wish you’d never met me.
I wish so many things had been different.
(But I continue learningI never meant to do those things to you)
You taught me so much. You taught me to feel, to care for others again, to love. You brought back my heart that I thought dead. You saved me from myself.
My soul, blackened and hidden by merciless killing and the loss of everyone who had cared for me once (save perhaps my master), was made whole and good again by you’re presence.
And I gave you pain. I gave you death and blood on the ivory snow. I destroyed your happiness and your life.
I took everything from you and drained you dry, and then I killed you.
Sorry? The word is empty and meaningless in the face of such atrocities.
(And so, I have to say before I goThat I just want you to know)
I have to leave soon. To go back to the death and slaughter that was once all I knew.
Why am I doing this? Why do I return to the work I wished to forsake, as my soul screams at me to stop killing. (I've found a reason for meTo change who I used to beA reason to start over newAnd the reason is you)
But when this is all over... when the new government comes... I’m going to stop. I swear to you, on your grave. I will never kill again.
Because of you. Because I can never kill again without seeing your face and your blood staining my body.
I would have given my life up as a hitokiri for you. I will do so in the future so that I can stop piling more sins upon my soul and your grave. (I'm sorry that I hurt youIt's something I must live with everyday)
I can feel my tears beginning to fall again. One of them makes a hot slash and crosses the scar you completed.
I’ll live with this scar for the rest of my life, as a reminder of the atonement I must strive for. These sins are mine to bear, and I will carry them until the day I die.
For I can never atone enough for what I have done. But I will hold onto the hope that maybe, if I do enough, you'll forgive me.
For I can never atone enough for what I have done.
(And all the pain I put you throughI wish that I could take it all awayAnd be the one who catches all your tearsThat's why I need you to hear)
I came here today to make this promise. That I would stop killing one day, stop all the madness, and protect people.
I can’t take away your pain or give you back your happiness. I couldn’t even give you a new happiness.
So all I can do is make sure that no one else suffers the way you did. (I've found a reason for meTo change who I used to beA reason to start over newAnd the reason is youAnd the reason is youAnd the reason is youAnd the reason is you)
You were my everything once. My light, my love, my heart. You were what turned me from a monster, into a man.
And now you’re my reason to fight. You’re my reason to keep alive so that I may one day, just maybe, be worthy of redemption.(I'm not a perfect personI never meant to do those things to you)
“One day... I’ll come back here again. When I’ve found... something.” I promise softly to an impassive stone.
I don’t know what I’ll look for, what I’ll do when this meaningless war ends.
I suppose I’ll simply become a rurouni, wandering throughout the country and helping the helpless.
Somehow, that doesn’t seem enough. How can someone who has only ever known how to kill and destroy possibly help people? What kind of existence will I lead as a wanderer?
(And so I have to say before I goThat I just want you to know)
“Himura.” Katsura says quietly.
I turn and nod slightly. Its time to return to the battlefield.
That horrible, hellish place that was once the only place I knew, my only home. Now it seems a cold and evil Hell that destroys men’s souls. (I've found a reason for meTo change who I used to beA reason to start over newAnd the reason is you)
As I turn, I keep that promise glued into my soul. I know that Katsura will accept it. He knows me and the lengths I will go to make that promise happen.
I will never kill again after this.
Tomoe... I am so sorry. But I will make sure that your death was not in vain by ending this war. And I will make sure that afterwards, I will find a way to atone for what I have done to you and everyone else I have killed. (I've found a reason to showA side of me you didn't knowA reason for all that I doAnd the reason is you)
And perhaps when I can at last atone... will you forgive me?
AN: Thanks fo reading and please review!
Converting /tmp/phpE6r1KM to /dev/stdout
(I'm not a perfect personThere are many things I wish I didn't do)
“I’m sorry Tomoe.”
The words seem so hollow, standing here, above your grave. How can two words possibly tell of the grief, the suffering, the utter agony of knowing that I knowing I killed your happiness and then you.
Oh, if I could pull back those two fatal strokes. If I could have taken a different path, never let you see me at my morbid work. I wish you’d never met me.
I wish so many things had been different.
(But I continue learningI never meant to do those things to you)
You taught me so much. You taught me to feel, to care for others again, to love. You brought back my heart that I thought dead. You saved me from myself.
My soul, blackened and hidden by merciless killing and the loss of everyone who had cared for me once (save perhaps my master), was made whole and good again by you’re presence.
And I gave you pain. I gave you death and blood on the ivory snow. I destroyed your happiness and your life.
I took everything from you and drained you dry, and then I killed you.
Sorry? The word is empty and meaningless in the face of such atrocities.
(And so, I have to say before I goThat I just want you to know)
I have to leave soon. To go back to the death and slaughter that was once all I knew.
Why am I doing this? Why do I return to the work I wished to forsake, as my soul screams at me to stop killing. (I've found a reason for meTo change who I used to beA reason to start over newAnd the reason is you)
But when this is all over... when the new government comes... I’m going to stop. I swear to you, on your grave. I will never kill again.
Because of you. Because I can never kill again without seeing your face and your blood staining my body.
I would have given my life up as a hitokiri for you. I will do so in the future so that I can stop piling more sins upon my soul and your grave. (I'm sorry that I hurt youIt's something I must live with everyday)
I can feel my tears beginning to fall again. One of them makes a hot slash and crosses the scar you completed.
I’ll live with this scar for the rest of my life, as a reminder of the atonement I must strive for. These sins are mine to bear, and I will carry them until the day I die.
For I can never atone enough for what I have done. But I will hold onto the hope that maybe, if I do enough, you'll forgive me.
For I can never atone enough for what I have done.
(And all the pain I put you throughI wish that I could take it all awayAnd be the one who catches all your tearsThat's why I need you to hear)
I came here today to make this promise. That I would stop killing one day, stop all the madness, and protect people.
I can’t take away your pain or give you back your happiness. I couldn’t even give you a new happiness.
So all I can do is make sure that no one else suffers the way you did. (I've found a reason for meTo change who I used to beA reason to start over newAnd the reason is youAnd the reason is youAnd the reason is youAnd the reason is you)
You were my everything once. My light, my love, my heart. You were what turned me from a monster, into a man.
And now you’re my reason to fight. You’re my reason to keep alive so that I may one day, just maybe, be worthy of redemption.(I'm not a perfect personI never meant to do those things to you)
“One day... I’ll come back here again. When I’ve found... something.” I promise softly to an impassive stone.
I don’t know what I’ll look for, what I’ll do when this meaningless war ends.
I suppose I’ll simply become a rurouni, wandering throughout the country and helping the helpless.
Somehow, that doesn’t seem enough. How can someone who has only ever known how to kill and destroy possibly help people? What kind of existence will I lead as a wanderer?
(And so I have to say before I goThat I just want you to know)
“Himura.” Katsura says quietly.
I turn and nod slightly. Its time to return to the battlefield.
That horrible, hellish place that was once the only place I knew, my only home. Now it seems a cold and evil Hell that destroys men’s souls. (I've found a reason for meTo change who I used to beA reason to start over newAnd the reason is you)
As I turn, I keep that promise glued into my soul. I know that Katsura will accept it. He knows me and the lengths I will go to make that promise happen.
I will never kill again after this.
Tomoe... I am so sorry. But I will make sure that your death was not in vain by ending this war. And I will make sure that afterwards, I will find a way to atone for what I have done to you and everyone else I have killed. (I've found a reason to showA side of me you didn't knowA reason for all that I doAnd the reason is you)
And perhaps when I can at last atone... will you forgive me?
AN: Thanks fo reading and please review!
Converting /tmp/phpE6r1KM to /dev/stdout