Rurouni Kenshin Fan Fiction ❯ Uncertain Emotions ❯ Uncertain Emmotions ( One-Shot )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Uncertain Emotions
By: Pyro Kitty

Disclaimer: I don't own Kenji, Kenshin, Kaoru, Chizuru, or any of the Kenshin-gumi. They all belong to Watsuki-sama!

A/n: Man I re-read this and I was so fed up with my spelling errors! SO I went through and added a bit to it and improved the spelling and grammar! If you DON'T know who Kenji is I recommend you read Manga vol. 28 or watch Seisou Hen (I promise you will cry your eye's out if you watch Seisou hen) or you can email me at ChibiOro@neo-anime.org and I will send you a little information on Kenji (pre-typed and everything). But in simple terms Kenji is a stubborn ass who hates his father (Kenshin).


Shinta=Kenshin
Kenshin=Shinta

***
Kenji's POV
***

I remember the day I found you and Okaa-san in the sakura grove.

At first look I would have thought you sleeping but, by the way Okaa-san was crying, I knew otherwise.

Okaa-san was so sad. Sitting there murmuring tearful words to you.

The only emotion that went through me was anger.

Anger towards you

Okaa-san was crying.

I hated it when Okaa-san cried. . especially when it was you who made her cry.

You may not have known it (but knowing you, you probably did) but whenever you would leave you made Okaa-san cry.

You where always off somewhere or another, and when you came back I could not help but be mad at you.
Mad because you dared to come back and act as though you where never gone. As a child I always made my feelings known, by pulling on your hair, climbing on the roofs of the dojo, and other childish things to either get away from you or let you know how I felt.

But you would always just smile, and your feelings where left the same.

They call me stubborn, but I would never be able to compete with you in that department.

I didn't attend your cremation. Okaa-san cried and begged me to come, you know I don't deny Okaa-san anything, but I had my mind set, and I was not going. Yahiko-san gave me a whack in the head for that one.

Okaa-san passed not to long after you did.

But by that time there wasn't much of Okaa-san left. I remember the time when she called me Shinta.

It was the night after your cremation that I woke up to Okaa-san's screaming. I was so worried I went to her room to see what was wrong. Megumi-san and Yahiko-san where already there when I slid open the shoji. Okaa-san was sleeping fitfully, crying out in her sleep. Megumi-san tried to wake her up, but when she was fully awake I knew she wasn't the same Okaa-san who had raised me. She stared right at me then started reaching out for me screaming the name 'Shinta'.

I was confused. Not knowing any one by the name of Shinta.

I was also upset.

Upset that she didn't recognize her own son.

I asked Yahiko-san who this Shinta was, thinking he was a friend of Okaa-san's (A very dear friend at that for her to be mistaking me for him)

Yahiko-san didn't answer me, and instead looked at the jar in the corner of the room that held the ashes.

Then I knew.

Shinta was you.

I couldn't help but feel as though my Okaa-san, my dear Okaa-san who raised me and protected me as a child, had betrayed me. I ran out of her room, with Yahiko-san close behind (leaving Megumi-san with Okaa-san). Yahiko-san said that Okaa-san was just upset over the death of her husband

"We are all upset." He stated

"Not me, I'm glad he's gone." I replied bitterly. Yahiko-san denied that, and tried to reason another answer out of me.

And explanation for my choice of words.

I'm almost as stubborn as you.

That night I ran away from the dojo, and Okaa-san, for the second time in my life. I did return a couple days later, mother was almost back to normal.

I almost ran my self on my own sword when I found out I had made mother cry.

She apologized for calling me by your name.

And the sense of betrayal I held was lifted.

That night I stayed by Okaa-san's side and late into the night, when she eventually passed away.

Okaa-san was cremated the day after.

They, Megumi-san and Yahiko-san that is, held on to the ashes for a couple years. They where placed on a small alter that they had erected in the training hall. But eventually they buried the two jars together in the sakura grove I had found you and Okaa-san in that day when you had finally returned to her.

Things around here have changed a lot since both you two passed.

Yahiko-san and Tsubame-san have finally wedded, and are expecting there first child late this spring.

I've also met a girl.

It was during last years new-years festival. Tsubame-san had dragged me along with her and Yahiko-san claiming that It couldn't be good for my health to stay cooped up in the dojo as much as i did.

I mildly paid attention to it all, and took the first opurtunity presented to me to make my grand escape.

I wandered around a bit, taking in the surroundings a bit, and somewhere in the middle of it all, I met Raikouji Chizuru.

She had been being picked on by a group of thugs. Me having inherited your knack of playing 'hero' and jumping in to save the damsel in distress, defended her and threatened them with my sword. They being smart enough to know when danger was looking them in the eye, scampered off like a bunch of puppies that had just been kicked.

Chizuru-chan never left me alone after that.

She's a nice girl, whith a very spunky attitude.

Yahiko-san claims she has even more spunk than Okaa-san ever had (along with claiming that she was much prettier than Okaa-san which got the shit beaten out of him)

This year, when the sakura-bloomed she, Chizuru-chan thats is, talked me into going to visit the sakura grove where you and Okaa-san are buried.

I went on my own will

To pay respect to Okaa-san mind you.

I still haven't fully forgiven you for all the times you hurt her.

I don't know if I ever fully will, not yet at least.

But I will tell you one thing:

You better not leave Okaa-san alone in the next life like you did in this one.

Or I will give your reincarnate* a personal and up close viewing of the Hiten Mitsurugi-ryuu.

~Owari~

Japanese terms:

Shoji: A movable room partition made out of wood and rice paper. The doors slide on tracks

Okaa-san: Mother

Hiten Mitsurugi-ryuu: If you don't know this yet, i'm VERY suprised.

* Note: the Japanese religion believed in life after death but not in the same sense of Christians. They believed in reincarnation, which is that you would be born onto the earth again. I'm guessing Kenshin, Kaoru, Kenji, and the kenshin-gumi where buddhist like most of japan.
(This has been revised from its original form and lengthened thanks to my three, kind reviewers. Especially Gochan. I'm thinking of MAYBE coninuing this but i'm not sure.)