Saber Marionette Fan Fiction ❯ Precious Things ❯ Chapter 1 ( Chapter 1 )

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Precious Things
a Saber Marionette fan fic
by
Lady Aoi

Summary: Yumeji hurts his big brother's feelings and wants to make up for it. But what can he do to make his onii-sama happy again?
Rating: G
Spoilers: If you know who Yumeji is you're fine -- nothing past episode 2 of SMJ. However, understanding of the fic will be enhanced if you have seen episode two of SMJ Again, in which Hanagata's special crystal ball makes its only appearance.
Lady Aoi's Notes: Did anyone wonder when I'd write something that wasn't X rated? *cackle*

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Deep within the Japoness forest, made almost unnoticible by years upon years of dark foiliage and rotting moss lay the entrance to an underground cave. And judging from the trail of recently broken foliage, up turned rocks and dark berries bleeding in the muddy imprints of large shoes, the entrance no longer had the luxury of going unnoticed.

Near the cave's mouth, a pair of birds paused in their morning scavanging as a loud belly laugh penetrated the clear forest air. As the young sparrows screeched in flight, the laugh was quickly accompanied by an equally loud and booming voice.

"Awwright, settle down! We gots business to discuss!"

And within the underground cave, four pairs of mouths snapped shut and four masked heads turned towards a single point. Four pairs of eyes locked onto a large chair in the center of the cavern and four pairs of knees immediately lowered themselves to the sandy, damp floor.

"Bea-yoo-ti-ful," the little figure hiding somewhere in the darkness of the chair stated, clapping his hands together. "Awlright, yous guys. Role call. Jorgenstein."

"Jawohl!"

"Lovejoy!"

"Yo."

"Brovlovski."

"Da."

"Aaaand Rei."

"Hai."

"Bea-yoo-ti-ful. Alright, yous guys. I've as-sembled us this fine morning for two special announcement types. The foist of which being, that we've changed our name all official-like."

A murmur of puzzlement ran through the four assembled men.

"Hey, pipe down!" The figure held his diminutive hands up for silence. "Ahem. As I was sayin' we ain't no longer the Really, Really Bad Bandit Gang."

The men exchanged nervous glances before Lovejoy hesitantly raised his hand.

"You gotta beef wif the management 'a this fine operation, Lovejoy?"

The New Texan visibly quaked in his cowboy boots, causing his bent and rusty spurs to rattle noisily. "N--n--no, Y-- yakada-sama," he stammered. "I ain't trying to cause no trouble, sir. I jest --"

"Well?"

"Well... I don't know as I speak fer the rest of the boys butcha see, I'm a tad bit curious why ya changed the name."

"Is that so?"

"Well, yeah," Lovejoy shakily mopped his brow. "It ain't that I'm questionin' it's jest... well, I reckon'd the last name was perty good... kinna catchy."

His three fellow bandits nodded and murmured their timid agreement.

"Really? Well, Lovejoy, I "reckon" that you are in the vast and great minority, "pardner", 'cuz I thought it sounded real amaturish. Real little league, if ya catch my drift."

This time, all four bandits nodded and murmured a significantly more vociferous agreement.

"So, moving on," Yataka continued, clapping his hands together. "From hence forth on, we will be goin' under the prestigious title 'a The Inter-national Crime King Syndicate, which, when acronymed all pretty is shortened to the far more scary and fear inspirin- name 'ICKS'."

His bandits merely stared at him and blinked before Brovlovski slowly raised his hand.

"Aww, what'samadda now, Brovlovski?"

"Vell, you choose new name suddenkly and... new name is good, no? But, no tryink to argue vith you, but... this ICKIES --"

"ICKS." Yataka snapped coldly, flicking some of his cigar ash onto the cave floor.

"Da, da, this...ICKS... I do not know if, ccchow you say, this ICKS is good name zat inschpires fear."

"And why not?!" The bandit leader's bark caused all four of his men to take a few shuddering steps backwards and then a few more, as Yataka angrilly jabbed his cigar at them. "Gimme one good reason why it ain't, any of yous!"

"V---v--v--vv--velll..."

"Well..."

"Uuhhh h..."

"Ano...."

"Yeah, yeah, I thought so, yous traidahs," Yataka snarled. "Lemme put it this way, boys. You gots two choices b'fore yous. Foist, ya either accept the name for the really scary an' fear-inspirin' acronymical thing it is, or ya walk on outta this cave and go back ta yer miserable, small-time pointless lives ya had b'fore we was the International Crime King Syndicate. Kapish?"

Everyone kapished by nodding his head.

"So is any of you's gonna be so ungreatful as to break my kind and pityin' heart by walkin' outa this cave an' into that cold, croil world out theah?"

Not a bandit moved.

"Bee-yoo-ti-ful," Yataka clapped his hands together yet again. "Alright, since there are no *meaningful* objectifications to our splendid new name, we can move on to the second order 'a business on our list this fine morning. In order for to celebrate our new name change, we're gonna pull off one 'a the biggest heists Japoness has ever seen. Obsoive," Yataka pointed at a map stuck to the cave wall with some mouldy masking tape and what appeared to be chewing gum. "This is a map 'a the Japoness warehouses near the northern most corner 'a the country. Obsoive the warehouse coicled with red very carefully, gentlemen. 'Cuz this warehouse in particular contains whole barrels 'a summa the finest oil ever pumped in Japoness -- oil that your home country of origin, Lovejoy, would be particulary keen on buyin' from us at a price inflated way above it's reg'lar value sos they could keep their corner on the market, if ya catch my drift."

Eager to appease what they perceived as their leaders's wounded ego in light of the ICKS debacle, the four bandits nearly fell over themselves with eager praises for Yataka's brilliant scheme (even though Jorgenstein and Brovlovski thought it the stupidist plan their leader had ever formulated while Lovejoy simply didn't understand a word of it, being far too busy wondering where his gum had gone to care very deeply about any plan, no matter how brilliant or stupid). At the sight of their eager approval, the minute bandit leader smiled, feeling suddenly two feet taller in his control over the situation.

"Bee-yoo-ti-ful. So, go pack up our camp, yous guys. We leave for Japoness just as soon as I've had my beauty sleep fer the day."

"Yes, Yataka-sama," the men sighed as their somewhat-Napoleonic leader excused himself with the extinguishing of his cigar as he headed for one of the cave's back chambers.

"Oh, and one more thing," Yataka said, turning around. "Yous guys were real good during our little one-on-one today... and that bein' the case, I think yous should get a little reward for your good behavior."

Four pairs of ears immediately picked up.

"So, I said to myself -- 'hey, self. Why don'tcha give those guys a break and have them --" Yataka's mouth twitched into a sadistic grin. "Go out and find you breakfast before you leave for Japoness. An' you better have it ready at the end of my beauty sleep, yous guys. Or else," the bandit patted his pocket lovingly. "Miser Boom Boom gets kinna cranky."

"H--hai, Yataka-san."

"Bee-yoo-ti-ful."

And the small cave rang loudly with the bandit leader's shrill laughter.