Sailor Moon Fan Fiction / Ah My Goddess Fan Fiction / Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction ❯ Hikkomi Houou ❯ chapter 3 ( Chapter 3 )

Standard disclaimers.

Chapter 3

Sometimes even Kami-Sama has regrets about the choices he makes. It was needed, and there really was no other way to do it, but it still worried him. Skuld was being asked to take a tremendous risk, in her attempts to help Ranma.

When you live your life, you experience it. It happens to you, you put the walls in place to deal with life's failures, fears, and follies. Betrayals, lies all of those things that cause you pain, you learn to handle, because you go through them as they happen. There are those few rare souls that can read others, so well, that in a moment, all that the person has been is dumped into the head of the psychic. Generally these folks go mad. Its better for them anyway. In this moment, Skuld and Ranma shared a total link. Everything the one knew, the other knew as well, All at once, A blinding dump of information. Gods and goddess's are made of sterner stuff than normal humans but Ranma is anything but normal. All of the information he gets, of the ways that the universe works, washes over him. Its still here, but he doesn't really comprehend much of it. And if anything he can Cope with new things. Its what he does.

Skuld on the other hand, is a young goddess, new to her task's, and she is taking all of what has happened to Ranma into her all at once. Imagine if you can, the assumption of living through the Neko-ken training, while the “let be friends” is played in your mind, with the table, and abuse of two years, and waving goodbye to Uc-chan, your only friend, while finding you have her hurt for 10 years, while finding that Uc-Chan is in fact a girl. All while you are fighting Saffron, to save the one you love from death, while she is sleeping with her lawyer and you watch.

That is the mess Skuld's mind has to cope with this instant. She has to reign it all in. She is a goddess, she can handle this. She knows she can handle it. Yes… she can handle it… she thinks, as blackness totally consumes her. But even unconsciousness cannot stop the memories that are now hers, and the pain that she must share. Ranma feels her pain, in response to his, and a sort of feedback loop is started, until unconsciousness claims him as well.

Unfortunately, This causes her to become visible, as she falls to the ground, on his futon.

In the center of everyone's mind is a spot, where someone feels the most at home. For Skuld, it's a spot under a tree in heaven, for Ranma, It's a spot near a bridge that he used to play with Uc-chan. And here, the inner Ranma, met the inner Skuld, under a tree, by a bridge, in their joined minds. Here he is free from the demons that await in the outer ranges of his mind. He is younger, back at the time he was last happy. He is un-cursed, and uncaring of anything that happens outside of his walls. He is a happy boy, good at the art, and still has the love that the Kami granted to him at birth. Skuld is very much like she is now, But, the opposite. She is the grown up Skuld, the fully developed goddess. She is the image of what she wishes to be. She is free from her own doubts, about how much better her older sisters are, or if her inventions are good enough, when compared to the magic that Urd wields.

Ranma looks around, and sits, playing with a push-cart that Uc-Chan had. He ignores Skuld all together. He knows that she is part of the darkness that is outside his bubble. Maybe if he ignores her she will go away. She looks at him, and realizes that whatever this melding was it was not total. There was a part of each of them, still held in reserve. For him it was his childhood before the Neko-ken. That was his, and his alone. For her, it was the knowledge of what she was to become. Though was not yet. The dream she had, of who to become. These parts were separate, and from that separation perhaps she could work with the Ranma

“Ranma, what are you doing” she crouches down to be at his level

“nothing” he replies pushing the cart.

“that is a nice cart”

“Its Ucchan's. he gave it to me.”

“where is Ucchan, Ranma?”

“Out there” Chibi-Ranma pointed at the walls that lined the space that they existed in. swirling darkness surrounded the place they were in. if you examine it closely you could see images of things from both of their minds happening. More so from Ranma's life, than Skuld's.

“What is out there?”

“Bad things.”

Skuld spent some time pushing the cart with Chibi-Ranma, until he got bored of that. She spent time quietly playing with him, as he went from a ball to play catch with, to games he had as a younger child at home. She talked of meaningless things, with him, as he grew to talk to her more. In their minds, much time had passed, days weeks past, they get used to each other, comfortable. But still neither is closer to moving to the outside., through that massive storm of darkness that sits on the edges of the known world. She brings him games she knew, teaches him the proper technique of bug smashing, and how to fly. However, in the back of her mind, she knows she must take the lead. Its her job, she must lead him out.

“Ranma, Its time for us to go back.”

“why?”

“Would it be bad to never learn any new arts?”

“yes, but cant you teach me?”

“Not all of them. Would it be bad to never see your mother again? Or Ucchan?”

“Yes, I want to see mommy again and Ucchan”

“You have to walk out there to see them again.”

“Don't Wanna”

“why not?”

“bad things in there. Bad people out there. Safer in here.”

“Are you afraid Ranma?”

“NO! I just… don't want to.”

“Ranma, It's ok to be afraid.”

“No its not. Men are not afraid. I am a man.”

“Is your father afraid of anything?”

“Uhmm Nope! Because he is a man”

“What about your mother. Isn't he afraid of that?”

“Well, yeah I guess”

“Think a sec, Ranma. What is your father REALLY afraid of… Really”

Chibi-Ranma ponders this a bit “Not Eating Dinner, he is really afraid of that”

“Does that make him not a man?”

“No my Daddy is a man.”

“Then men can be afraid right?”

“I guess so, Daddy always steals food because he is afraid of not eating.”

“He fights against his fears. “

“But not mommy. He runs from her”

“But you don't run form her, you want to see her”

“Yeah”

“We can go there, but you have to trust me, and hold my hand as we go.”

“Are we going out there?” Chibi-Ranma looks at the storm.

“Yes, we are going to go through that. But your not alone, I am with you.”

“Ok… But you have to promise not to let me be alone there. Promise?” She takes his hand, “I promise Ranma, I will not let you be alone in the in that storm.”

A light glows from her for a moment, and she realizes what she has done. She has bound herself to him, for as long as he lives, she will always make sure he is not alone, to face the world. This is NOT what she had in mind starting this conversation. But if it's the only way she will ever get him out of here… Well, Kami-sama would not like it if her charge went insane in response to being given the wish. She walked with him into the storm to face the demons that lay there.

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Grandpa Hino was sore. Rei's response to learning that their family were Shinto priests of old, and what that MEANT was a little painful. She can still see her horror when he described some of the things Hino's had done in the past, and why it was so important for them to keep their ancestors from effecting the lives of the living. Rei was very unhappy with all of this and had run off, apparently to go talk to her friends. He decided he needed to check on Ranma, so walked to the room he put her up in.

As he entered, he saw a very passed out Ranma, who was now male, and strangely enough, a younger female, with weird tattoos on her face, passed out as well. “Uhmm…, Wow” the girl was a little young for him to grope, so he examined her a bit, and then his grandmothers words came back to haunt him “A kami has already come to comfort him…” Grandpa Hino shuddered and decided that groping her would be a BAD IDEA â„¢. He tried to wake Ranma up, no luck and tried to shake the girl, gently. Again no luck. He left them, and came back a few hours later, Still no luck. Rei had not returned yet either.

“Well shoot, I probably better try and call a Doctor to see if anything serious is wrong with them…”

He went into his room, picked up the phone and dialed what he thought was a normal doctor. Of course, with all of this insanity, he did not in fact GET a regular doctor…

 

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There are the demons that push us the most. These are the demons that we try the hardest to forget. And who's demons must be faced first, the first one to grab you of course. The ones that are leaving you alone, those are easier. The problems of being in a world of dreams, of nightmares really is that the nightmares often control the dream, and only by waking up, in parts are you able to control it. If Skuld faced her worst fear first, would she be able, and strong enough to lead Chibi-Ranma out? She was expecting to deal with his issues first, but instead, as the winds died down, She stood, hand in hand with Ranma, facing the shrine. This is the home of her sister, Bell dandy, and Urd. Standing before her is her sister, Urd, standing tall over her, impossibly tall, looking down on her, haughtily.

“Well, Well, Well, what have we here, Little Skuld has a boyfriend?” Skuld looked at herself, and she too was a Chibi, younger, even Ranma at 6 was older than her. “you will NEVER grow up Skuld,. In fact, I will make sure of it” Oni-Urd pulls out a bubbling green liquid, in a glad bottle, and starts moving for Chibi-Skuld. Ranma moves protectively in front of Skuld, “leave her alone!” he cries. Oni-Urd just looks at him, and leers “I will break you properly later boy, first I must destroy my little sister, I AM a demon after all” with this, her form changes, shifting, becoming more demonic. The goddess marks shift to make that of the demon named Mara. Oni-Urd again starts moving and reaching for Chibi-Skuld. She tries to pull her mallet out of magic-space â„¢ but all she gets is an Acme Mallet-sama 400, with real self blow up action, deflated. Urd missed as she reached for the scrambling back Skuld. Ranma see all of this and laughs. “an almost crying Chibi-Skuld yells at him “what is so funny!”

“Well all of it” laughs Ranma. She is a funny Old lady… “OLD!” the Oni yells at Ranma, changing targets and swinging to grab Ranma. “Yeah yah old bag… Old… like a mummy, and not mine either “ Sticking his tongue out and going Biih deh. “I am surprised someone of your age can move that fast. I mean you look like you mid 40's or so. And Chubby.. you gotta eat less or folks will confuse you with a hypo.”

As each insult comes, Oni-Urd gets smaller and smaller, until finally she's a mini-Oni-Urd, jumping up and down and screaming. “GET BACK DOWN THERE SKULD AND DRINK MY POTION” screamed the miniature demoness. At this point, Even Skuld started giggling. Like many times when you're really afraid, its all you can do once you start laughing to stop, and she was rolling on the floor, laughing at the mini-Urd. She stops whipped the tears form her now adult again eyes, and she realizes that she is back to what she was here. With a “hurmph” the Mini-Urd disappears. And the area they are in folds back into the storms…

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Rei was sick to her stomach. Her ancestors sacrificed each other to guard the gates of hells? Her ancestors were restless dead? Her grandfather summoned them up? What did this all mean. She didn't go to Usagi for advice this time, it was the kind of problem. She wandered around for hours, until she found herself outside of Setsuna's house. “yeah she scares the living daylights out of me, but she is the best one to talk too” Rei walked up and rang the bell

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The mists part again, and a new scene opens up. Its cramped. And Chibi-Ranma is curled into a ball, not moving, being totally silent. Skuld stoops next to him, “what's wrong”

“shh, its going to come back,”

“what is Ranma”

“the Beast” if I wait here, eventually it may not come back, and then I can rest forever”

She looks around the cramped underground pit she is in. the smell of urine, feces, and something vaguely Fishy permeates the air. She moves her foot slightly, and it squishes in something very much like fecal matter, or animal guts.

“Its coming back… Its going to hurt me again”

“its ok, Ranma, your not alone I am with you I will stop it.”

“no one can stop it. Ever. Sometimes it lets me be while it feeds.”

“shh its ok” she puts her hand on his shoulder, and feels him silent sob, as a noise is coming form the darkness beyond.

“Rwwoanma…. Brooowy…. Rwooorthless…. Beoooowy…..” she heard being spoken in the darkness. It was an odd voice, a great humanish sound along with a cattish sound. Out of the darkness she could see a great lumbering shape. It was a Huge cat, in a girly smelly Gi. A Fat one, head wrap, and claws that were longer than Chibi-Ranma's arms. “Trainings you must have Trainings..” the beast bellowed. Ranma cowered behind Skuld. She realized what this fear was. What the Neko-Ken was. Fear, of failure, fear of the cats, but more fear of failure a young boy had from his father. He BECAME the demon that haunted Ranma's soul. The cats, are a part of it, but, this is the beast that enslaved the love Ranma had for everyone else. He sees dragging behind it, the body of a small child. “Come onnnes Rwaaanmaah, Come trains with your little Uihhchannn…” he throws the mangled body of Chibi-Ukyo at Ranma's feet. The head swivels a bit, one dead eye lolling up to look at him, “Help me get as good as you are Ranma. Don't let it hurt me anymore” Ranma again curls up into a ball and shakes. Skuld holds on to Ranma's shoulder, and pushes Back on the Genma-Neko, Hard. It moves slightly, but not much. “whhhat you doing here Giiihrl…” The beast looks at Skuld. “Booohy brwwwing a New training partner withhhh hihmm” The Neko-ma grabs Skuld and throws her into the pit wall. She lands in the torn bones, and feels a sharp bone enter her side. Blood, She is not experienced with blood, The Neko beast jumped her again. Scratching her arms, then grabing her and tossing her again. Skuld screamed, as she flew through the air, feeling her left arm snap as she hit the wall. The Genma-neko Stands over her, laughing at her “foooowlish Woman…. You cannot defeat us…. We are the ultimate fighter…. We aaarhh the Besst…” the Neko-beast laughed. Ranma could hear her whimpering, could feel the broken bones, and pain, and the fear in her heart. The duty of a martial artist is to protect the weak. Even against the worst of demons, even against his father. No matter how scared he was he must act. “Stop” he said weakly.

“Soon I shawll Fweast on your bones, and bring him your head to play with…”

“Stop!” he said louder.

“Your skills are no match for my Power…. Girl…”

A roar come from Ranma, as he yells, and jumps at the beast. As he flies through the air, his adult form is taken, his battle aura grows around him, and he throws one massive punch at the beast. The Beast Turns around, surprised on his face, as Ranma pays no attention to its cat form, and just attacks with all of his fury he can manage. “I HATE YOU, AND YOU MUST DIE!” he throws a multitude of punches into the cat-beast, as each one hits, a part of the beast dissolves, leaving nothing behind. He continues to pound into the ground repeating “I hate you, I hate you” over and over, creating an indentation in the ground, until a hand is placed on his shoulder, and he looks up to Skuld, who has been healed of her wounds, looking down on him with compassion in her eyes. She understood now that she could not defeat his demons for him. He needed too. And that each demon was different. “Let leave here, Ranma, this too is only a dream”. Chibi-Ranma wipes away the tears that have been falling from his face, as he pounded the group, and takes her hand again.

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Grandpa Hino finished talking to the Doctor, and hung the phone up

“well for a doctor she certainly sounds cute”

 

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Rei sat sipping tea with Setsuna, and digested what she had been told. True that she came from a line of sick priests, but also true that she was reincarnated into this family for a reason. She had her Ki powers for a reason. And perhaps she would need to call on the dead as well. Nothing was done by chance in this, to ensure that the great city would come.

Setsuna looked at her, and said “also, we are approaching a time where you will gain a brother, if you have not already done so. You will need to treat him AS A brother, and not try and seduce him. Rei looked at her, realizing that she had never even seen Ranma's male form. Setsuna continued “your not the on that can heal his heart with that kind of love. You need to heal it with an open love that contains nothing more than the love of a sister. And another thing, Never EVER hit him. He is too abused already. “

Rei nodded in agreement. She cant argue with Pluto, that would just be a losing idea anyway.

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Several more fears, both his and hers they traveled through. Always working through them, and together getting past them. Till they came here. No fear or darkness really per say, but there was a nice house, table set up, they came in, Both in their natural forms rather then the assume forms they usually use. “welcome Ranma, this part of your mind is OUR home” this coming from a petite, well endowed woman with long flaming red hair. She Smirked at him, twisted a little and showed a Tremendous amount of Leg…

Ranko looked over both Ranma and Skuld. She looked well If that expression was on Ranma's face she would seem Very very angry. Which is precisely what she was. Pissed.

She was a seriously pissed at almost everyone in Ranma's life ever since she was “born” the day he fell into the waters. She was one of the main focus's of the rage that built inside of him. Always treated as an annoyance or weakness when it was obvious most of the time she was just as strong as her male half. She HATED Akane. Both for how she treated Ranma and how she acted to men in general. But more than anyone else she hated Genma. Had Genma been the slightest bit supportive of her Then they would not have had any of the problems they had had over the years. Three years she had been with him seen everything through his eyes and felt every beating every insult and each part of Ranma's decent into madness. If it were up to her None of the brigade would ever lay a hand n him again. None of them were able to place him above them even for a moment.

She was also pissed at Skuld but for a new reason. She did not like Skuld's interference as they had not asked for help. But in comparison to everything else that had been going on The goddess's meddling was minor. So far at least.

Ranma looked at Ranko. She was dressed in a red Chinese dress with black twin circling dragons around it. This was a dress Shampoo would have felt right at home in. twice in the past his female self had separated but she had never looked like this. He KNEW this was wrong but even he could feel a slight pressure building in his nose just looking at her. He had been married after all he knew what all those curves she had were good for. `Gah what am I thinking this is ME we are talking about'

“No Ranma this is US you were talking about. We are one you an I. So your thoughts about my body are no worse than say… Masturbation or something” she smirked at him.

“Gah…. Uhmmm”

“Just teasing Ranma. Now lets get to business. Your traveling through your mind with miss Goddess over there and facing all of your worst fears. You muster up enough courage and beat them down like you do everything else. Same with miss goddess there though hers seem milder compared to ours eh?”

Ranma nods at Ranko who seems to be very much in control of this situation. This is her shell world after all.

She continued “and that leads you here. To me. Making little Ole Me think that I am a worse fear to you then Cats or being beaten. Well I wont stand for it. We are better than that”

“what do you mean”

“You have no right being afraid of me. I AM you in part. And I am the ONE person in the world who has NEVER done anything to hurt you”

Ranma had long ago accepted that everything in this place was something he was afraid of. He accepted that he grew stronger by facing these fears. He could tell that. So why was he here. Why was he afraid of Ranko himself.

“I will admit that I must on some level be afraid of you but I don't know why.” Skuld look at him. “maybe this is why you are hear. To figure it out. What does she do that scares you?

“are you afraid of looking like me?”

“no you look great”

“are you afraid of losing your fighting skills because I am not as strong?”

“no your faster than I am so we match”

“Are you afraid I am going to hurt you?”

“No you ARE me.”

Well then WHAT!”

“Maybe just maybe I am afraid of liking being you. Of preferring you over me. Maybe I am afraid of losing myself in you. I guess I am afraid of being a girl because then I am not me.”

Skuld looks at him for a moment “Ranma Is your father still Genma when he is a panda?”

“Yeah I know I know the lesson your trying to teach here”

“Then why is it different? You are Ranma no matter who you are”

“Because She is not me.” Then he got it. He got his fear which was not that he would enjoy the female form more than his own but that he would enjoy being HER more then he ever enjoyed being him. Because being him was so painful. She did not have the fiancées really they were all Ranma's. She had an easier life than he did. He was afraid that he would take the easy way out and let her become him. “I am afraid that I would just give up and let her take over. That I would no longer be Ranma but Ranko. I am afraid she makes my death too easy”. Strangely he felt calm saying all of this. It was a starting realization that in his mind he had long considered the action to let her take over and become Ranma and let himself fade into the background until his consciousness faded away completely.

Ranko walked up to Ranma and kissed him fiercely. Then she Slapped him hard across the face. “I will never let you do that to me you prick. I am ME Not you and if I find a way to be separate again I MAY take it I may not but I will damm well NOT let you make me take over your crap. ” She continued “Because If I ever took over Every last one of them would pay dearly for what they have done to us. Starting with Genma and Akane.” Ranma and Ranko look like they are going to fight for a moment then Ranma realizes what he is doing. “yes I guess you would .that would be your right. Just like I chose not to do it you could.”

“Yeah you wimped out always afraid of hurting your friends feelings. Time to grow up Ranma. You just helped them stay the way they were never forced them to grow up.” She moved in closer with a short punch to his ribs. “You enabled her you fuck wit and paid for it over and over again.” He dodged and twisted a bit. Skuld was not worried she could tell that they were not trying to hurt each other and that Ranma was coming to a realization that he needed Desperately.

“You have been as bad as Ryoga blaming yourself for everyone else's problems. You take their issues as your own. You have been as delusional as Akane. You are better than that. You are better than any of them. What the hell are you feeling guilty about it for!” As she said all of this she punched him hard in the gut. “Stop feeling guilty. You don't have to feel guilty because you are better than them”

He lay there on the ground gasping for breath as she finished her assault. “I cant just beat you down huh. Your right. I AM better than this. I AM better than them.”

She looks down on him and says “Good If you really follow that I wont have to kick yer ass again. Ready to get outta here yet? Or are you going to want to beat yourself up some more?”

Ranma looked at her “Beat myself up?”

She looks at him stunned that he had gotten the rest but not this part yet.

“Yeah moron the only reason any of us `demons' are here is because you want us here. I'm wondering if you are ready to be done with us yet. Or are you still too scared to face the world out there Even with my help” Ranko replied.

“You will have mine as well Ranma. I am bound by my promise” Skuld offered.

Ranma thought a bit and saw a lot. Saw he was not the one at fault for all of it. `Some of it sure but why should I take all of it?' He thought `I always took the blame for my father to protect the family honor. I have always taken the blame for everything to protect someone's honor. I even took it when it was not my fault. I will from now on only accept the blame for my own actions not and protect my own honor. `But to do that he had to wake up and face the world he was in. He had to become alive again.

“Well are you ready?” Ranko said impatiently.

“Yes. I think I am” replied Ranma.

“Good because my next idea was if we were hanging around here much longer I would just have to seduce you. I don't think you're ready for that…” she said with an evil laugh.

Ranma Face faults at this concept… “Well you can't blame a girl for trying you are very cute” She replied to his face fault and her grin was the last thing he saw as his dream faded away.