Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Bishounen no Mori ❯ Goodbye, Senshi and Mamoru! Back to the Bishounen ( Chapter 6 )

Wow, can you believe I've actually made it to six episodes? I find it even harder to believe that some people have been putting up with my crap for six episodes! Well, here's brand new crap, fresh from my "brain"!

Disclaimer: As you all know, I did not create these characters. Sure, I could always say I did, but then swarms of angry fans would hunt me down and torture me until I admitted that they are not mine. Hmmm, now there's an idea most of you have probably considered a least once while reading this fic ^_^;; Most people feel like hunting me down, so you're not alone ^_^ Hop on the bandwagon!

Notes: OK, in this episode, there will be a couple pointless parts (What, isn't the whole thing pointless enough already?). You see, when my friends heard I was writing a fan-fic, they insisted on being in it :P So, I've given all that whined at me small parts (They each only have about one line, or no lines at all, in some cases ^_-). Heh heh, they asked for it *Evil grin*

Completed: 6/10/98 (Last revision: 2001.09.23)* * * * * * * * * *

Bishounen no Mori

Episode 6: Goodbye, Senshi and Mamoru! Back to the Bishounen!

Written By: Why do you ask this every episode? Have you got problems remembering my name? Am I THAT easily forgotten? (Oh, wait, I'm the one who wrote it out -_-;; I scare myself sometimes...No, make that most of the time...)* * * * * * * * * *

(Once again, I'm going back a little ways before the last episode ended...)

Back in the mall, out heroes (oh, and the Senshi, too ^_^) are walking back the way they came to get to the right exit. Hawk's Eye is sulking as he carries Fish Eye, still all tied up. Even though he's tied up, Fish Eye is still begging them to go into all the stores, but they refuse.

"We have to find Sailormoon," Jadeite tries to explain again (By the way, Jupiter and Venus are still hanging all over him).

"Who cares about her? She's stealing back my Mamo-chan!" Fish Eye yells, making Hawk's Eye temporarily lose hearing in his right ear.

"But you stole him from her in the first place!" Mars yells. Since Mars was standing to the left of Hawk's Eye, he loses hearing in that ear, also.

"But I'm better for him than she is! He was so happy with me..."

"That's because you brainwashed me!!" Mamoru yells. He's still a bit pissed that the others would dare to leave his Usako behind in this big mall. Knowing her, she could easily get lost...

"Well, didn't you have fun?" Fish Eye asks hopefully.

"Not really. All you ever wanted to do was fu--"

"Hey!" Mars yells, making Hawk's Eye's hearing even worse, "You can't say those kinds of things in front of your own daughter! Shame on you!" Mars slaps Mamoru and Fish Eye tries to attack her.

"Don't slap my Mamo-chan!!" Fish eye screeches, trying to escape from Hawk's Eye's grip.

"Hey, what's going on?!" Hawk's Eye yells (Since he can't hear very well, he has no idea how loud he is).

"She slapped my Mamo-chan!" Fish Eye whines.

Hawk's Eye, still not being able to hear very well, replies with a strange look. "If you want peaches, go to the supermarket. There aren't any fruit stands in the mall." Everyone sweatdrops.

"Ummm...Hawk's Eye? Just don't talk for awhile, OK?" Mercury says smiling, putting a hand on his shoulder (Whose hand is it? Augh, it's a severed hand! OK, I'll shut up now...)

He gives her a shocked and surprised look. "Ami-chan! We're in a mall with lots of people around! You shouldn't say things like that! And whose pager is going off? I hear a constant ringing!"

"OK, fine. I guess we shouldn't talk to you until your hearing comes back..." Mercury says, sulking a bit. How can they get to know each other better if he can't hear a word she's saying? She sighs, as the others continue to fight.

Suddenly, a girl with dark hair (With some light streaks in it...ehh, there's a pun in what I just said related to this scene ^_^;;) goes tearing through the mall naked. "Get free nuts! Large, economy size nuts! Long lasting!" (This is an inside joke no one will get ^_^). She laughs insanely. Even though she's running fast, Jadeite manages to get out his camera and use the rest of the roll for this...event. (It's the same camera used to take the pics of Fishy and Neffy kissing and the infamous hot tub scene...it will be an interesting roll to see when these pics are developed ^_-). Jupiter and Venus give him glares, but still don't let go of him. Everyone else sweatdrops. By now, the girl is gone (There you go, Alia! You got a part. Tee hee hee).

By this time, they have started approaching the store that Zoisite and Fish Eye had shopped at this morning. They both want to get a glimpse of the dress they made a bet on. Fish Eye thinks happily to himself, 'Heh heh, I know I've won this bet already. Zoisite thinks I don't know he's been cheating on his diet every time I turn my back, but I do. I just need to catch him in the act...' Fish Eye makes Hawk's Eye stop so they can look in the window. Fish Eye and Zoisite gasp in disbelief.

"What?! The dress is gone?!" Zoisite whines.

"How can this be?!" Fish Eye wails. He and Zoisite glare at each other.

"You! You must have taken the dress when I wasn't looking!!" Zoisite accuses, pointing at Fish Eye.

"No way! Why would I need to do that? I've already won the bet anyway!!" Fish Eye yells, once again trying to escape from Hawk's Eye's grip.

"You don't have any proof that I've been cheating on my diet!!" Zoisite yells, smirking.

"Ah ha! You just admitted that you have! That means I get the dress!" They both look back in the window and remember the dress is gone. "Oh yeah." Everyone sweatdrops.

"OK, just calm down," Kunzite says, dragging Zoisite away from Fish Eye. "It's just a dress, honey. I'm sure you'll find another one just like it."

"No I won't...it was one-of-a-kind!!" Zoisite collapses in tears against Kunzite, who sweatdrops. He doesn't see how Zoisite could get all worked up over a dress.

Zoisite's crying sets off Fish Eye. "Now I'll never see it again!" He starts crying against Hawk's Eye's shoulder. Hawk's Eye still has no idea what's going on.

"Ami-chan, why is everyone crying?" Hawk's Eye yells, as his hearing still isn't back.

Ami gets rid of her sweatdrop and says, "I guess Fish Eye and Zoisite made a bet on a dress, but someone else bought it."

Hawk's Eye gives her another strange look. "Fish Eye and Zoisite made a cat in the grass, but someone wrote on it? Ummm...whatever you say..." Ami sighs and hopes Hawk's Eye will get his hearing back soon so they can chat for awhile...

After a couple minutes, Fish Eye and Zoisite have calmed down and they all start walking again. Soon, they reach the exit of the mall.

"OK, now can you sense where Usako is?" Mamoru says impatiently, looking at Kunzite.

"I'm tired," Kunzite whines, "Make Jadeite do it."

"OK, Jadeite. Do it. Now!" (I command you to rise up and obey me! *smack*) Mamoru says in a motherly tone of voice.

"Oh, do I have to?" Jadeite whines (Damn, these boys are whiny...someone should punish them...and I don't mean in the name of the moon ^_-).

"Now, Jadeite, don't whine," Venus says warningly.

"Yeah," Jupiter adds, "Or we'll send you to bed without dessert!"

Everyone sweatdrops.

"Oh, all right..." Jadeite closes his eyes and senses around. "She's in that direction."

"Hey, we live in that direction!" Chibimoon says.

"You mean she went home?" Mars asks, not believing that even Usagi could be so inconsiderate.

"See, Mamo-chan? She doesn't even care about you! She completely forgot!" Fish Eye yells. "Please, stay with me. I'll never forget you're there!"

"I'd like to forget he's alive..." Zoisite mutters.

"No, Fish Eye! I've already told you NO!" Mamoru yells.

Fish Eye pouts as they start walking again. A girl wearing a short leather skirt and a skimpy halter top walks up to them. "Hey, any of you guys looking for a good time?" She smiles seductively at them. Zoisite, Kunzite, and Fish Eye couldn't care less, but Mamoru, Jadeite, and Hawk's Eye's eyes all bug out.

Mamoru walks up to her. "I am!" he begins to say, but then he remembers Usagi. "Oh wait. Never mind." He sulks and backs off.

Mercury notices Hawk's Eye staring at the girl and elbows him. He backs off too.

Jadeite walks up to her. "Oh yes, please!" The girl starts to come closer, but Jupiter and Venus (Who refuse to let go of Jadeite) growl at her and she runs off screaming. They scold Jadeite for acting like a horny old man (Heh heh, there you go, Heather. You got a part, too ^o^).

"OK, now let's get going again," Kunzite says, hoping there won't be any more distractions (Well, I wish I could do that, but I still have a few friends to shove in here. Sorry, Kunzy. Maybe someone, somewhere, will put you in a sane fic, someday ^_^;;).

Just then, a girl with curly (Actually, springy...boi-oi-oi-oing!) brown hair goes dancing down the middle of the street singing "It's Raining Men." Another girl with an axe comes out of the bushes. "That's enough out of you!" she yells and cuts off the head of the springy haired girl. The girl's head rolls around on the ground as her body searches for it. She finally finds it and picks it up, then she and the axe-carrying girl hold hands and skip off into the distance together (That was for Alicia and Anna. What happened was NOT my idea ^_^ Alicia said to have Anna cut her head off ^_^;;).

It takes a couple minutes for everyone to get rid of their sweatdrops this time, but they finally manage to, and they start walking again.

Finally, Chibimoon yells, "We're here!" and they all walk up to the front door. Mars rings the doorbell and Usagi's mother answers it.

"Yes? What can I do for you?" she asks, eyeing this strange group of girls in short skirts and kawaii bishounen (*acting like Homer* Mmmm...Bishounen...*DROOL!*).

"We came here to see Usagi," Chibimoon says, slightly amused that Usagi's mother doesn't recognize her in her Senshi form, even though she looks exactly the same.

"Oh. Just a second, please." She turns around and yells upstairs. "Usagi! You have some...friends here to visit you!" She turns back to the strange group. "Please, come in." After taking off their shoes, they all walk into the living room.

Usagi comes part-way down the stairs and gasps. Her mother looks at how shocked she is. "Do you know these people?"

Usagi snaps out of her shock. "Ummm, yes Mama."

"All right. I'll get back to making dinner." She goes back into the kitchen.

Usagi tries to run the rest of the way down the stairs...and, of course, she trips. She lands on top of Zoisite.

"Augh! Why does everyone seem to have a thing for landing on top of me today?! First in the hot tub, now this!" He angrily shoves Usagi off of him. She is about to burst into tears when...

"Usako! Are you all right?" Mamoru runs to Usagi. She looks at him, once more in shock.

"Mamo-chan! Where have you been? Are you all right?!" Everyone looks away slightly disgusted as they start kissing. Mamoru had been planning on scolding her for forgetting about him, but he forgets about that as they kiss.

Fish Eye sulks. "That used to be me..." he says pouting.

"I say, good riddance!" Zoisite yells happily. "Now, hopefully, I'll never have to see him again!" The other kings and Hawk's Eye cheer along with him, while Fish Eye keeps pouting...

"Well, I guess we should be heading back to the forest now..." Hawk's Eye says, looking longingly at Mercury, who blushes and then scribbles something down on a piece of paper and hands it to him.

"Here's my phone number. Call me sometime, if you want..." The girls (and the canned sit-com audience) all start going wooOOoo and making cat-calls, while the guys elbow Hawk's Eye, even if they don't understand his taste in women.

Jupiter and Venus both walk up to Jadeite and shove pieces of paper into his pockets. "Here's my number, Jade-chan," Venus says seductively. "You can call me anytime day or night...preferably at night, so we can talk dirty and no one will hear."

"Well, here's my number," Jupiter says, pushing in front of Venus. "You can call to talk dirty anytime day or night, because I live alone, so no one could stop us. Better yet, we don't have to just talk. You can come over anytime." Venus gives Jupiter a Look that could melt ice (Vanilla Ice, that is. Mmmm, I want vanilla ice cream...) They both start growling at each other and yelling. The guys all quickly and quietly slide away ¬_¬

Once they get far enough away from Usagi's house so that the girls can no longer see them, Fish Eye says, "I'm tired and pissed off. I want to go home right now."

"But first we have to get Nephrite and Tiger's Eye," Hawk's Eye says. "Where did they go, anyway?"

"We got rid of them while you were talking with that Mercury girl at the mall." Kunzite gives him a sly look. "We didn't want them to disturb you."

Hawk's Eye blushes slightly. "So, ah...where did you send them?"

"SailorMars sent them with some group of guys to a bar just outside the mall," Jadeite explains.

"Ehh?! You mean we have to go back to the mall again? Che!" Fish Eye whines.

"Woah, Fish Eye doesn't want to go to the mall? Something must be wrong with him..." Hawk's Eye says.

"Of course something's wrong with me! I lost my Mamo-chan to that stupid ditzy little rabbit!"

"What's wrong with you is that you even wanted him in the first place! Only crazy people lust after him!"

Before another cat-fight can start up, Kunzite breaks in. "All right, that's enough. Let's just go there quickly. The sooner we get them back, the sooner we can go to bed."

"Well, we can't go to bed before we eat," Zoisite adds.

Kunzite sweatdrops. "Yes, of course. Now let's go."

The guys all start walking towards the mall. They make it there much faster than before, since this time they don't run into any more of Spazz's insane friends. When they reach the mall, they look around for a bar...and sweatdrop when they see the only place the guys could have gone to...

"A karaoke bar?!" they all say simultaneously, fearing what awaits them inside...* * * * * * * * * *

Yo, minna! Sorry sorry SORRY this episode took so long and it's so short! I..I..I might have a good excuse, really! Just let me think...ehh, never mind. I'm just lazy :P Well, hopefully the next episode will be longer and won't take two months. After all, school's out now! So I'll have more time to write! (Well, except when I'm on vacations...like in a couple days, I'm going to Las Vegas ^_^;;). Hmmm, speaking of that, I need to pack! So see ya in episode 7, which will have some kawaii new bishounen! (Who, you ask? Just stay right there...and I'll show you! Uhhh, sorry, I've been watching the dub on Cartoon Network...)

Comments, questions, and dragon balls (Vegeta included ^_-) go to sailorspazz@yahoo.com