Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Learning to Trust Again ❯ PART 1: TORN ( Chapter 1 )

TITLE: LEARNING TO TRUST AGAIN

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Sailor Moon or its characters; I only own the following characters. Nor do I own the song Torn or any other I use throughout the fic.

AUTHOR'S NOTES: Time line is whatever, Usagi and the Inners are 16, Hotura is 15, Sestuna is ancient but looks in her early twenties, Haruka and Michuri are 18, Mamoru is 23.

"…" Talking

~…~ Thoughts

**…** Telepathic communication

<<AN: …>> Author's Notes

(…) Important details/info

#"…"# Speaking in a foreign language

*"…"* Speaking over the communicators

= … = Song lyrics

SUMMARY: After being brutally beaten and raped by Mamoru, can Kafir help Usagi regain her trust in men…and possibly, her love?

RATING: R

WARNINGS: Heavy swearing, violence, mild rape scene, tons of Mamoru bashing, hinted Yaoi and Yuri

GENRE: Angst/Romance

PART 1: TORN

Usagi curled up into a ball on the bloodstained and sweat-soaked covers of Mamoru's bed. Her thighs were sticky and covered in her virgin's blood and her rapist's semen. Shock still held her. Mamoru, her Itooshi (beloved), her husband to be…raped her. And beat her to unconsciousness to do the deed. Her jaw ached and was swollen, her pale, creamy skin covered in black and blue bruises. Bruises and lacerations peppered her skin. He had hit her before, but never this badly or in a place that is would show to her family and Senshi.

= I thought I saw a man brought to life
He was warm
He came around like he was dignified
He showed me what it was to cry
Well you couldn't be that man I adored
You don't seem to know
Seem to care what your heart is for =

She stifled a sob as she tried to sit up. Her ribs hurt her so much…they must be broken this time. She could hear the dull roar of the shower and knew that was where Mamoru was. She finally was able to stand with pain racking her entire frame. She carefully made her way over to her clothes and pulled on her torn school uniform. Usagi staggered barefoot out of Mamoru's apartment, desperate to escape Mamoru before he exited the shower. She stumbled past the apartment building's dozing security guard and onto the almost deserted street. She spared a glance at a nearby clock and dully noted it was almost two in the morning.

~Almost time for another Youma attack…they almost always come at two in the morning…~ Usagi thought as she hurriedly stumbled towards the park. And right on time her communicator went off. She pulled the communicator out of her sub-space pocket and activated it.

= But I don't know him anymore
There's nothing where he used to lie
My conversation has run dry

That's what's going on
Nothing's fine I'm torn

I'm all out of faith
This is how I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed
Lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed
Into something real

I'm wide awake
And I can see
The perfect sky is torn

You're a little late
I'm already torn =

*"Usagi!! Get your ass to the park! I've been trying to contact you for the last half hour!!"* Sailor Mars screamed over the comm. at her.

*"Almost there…"* Usagi grunted over the comm. as she forced her broken body into a run.

Her body screamed in agony as she entered the park. She paused only to transform into Sailor Moon. She staggered to closer to where the Inner Senshi were battling the Youma and almost screamed. Venus and Mercury were down with Mars and Jupiter about to join them on the ground.

"Late as usual, Usako?" a frighteningly familiar voice sneered behind her.

Moon stiffened and turned to see Tuxedo Kamen behind her. She froze and did the only thing she could think of: she screamed.

= So I guess the fortune teller's right
Should have seen just what was there
And not some holy light
Which crawled beneath my veins
And now I don't care
I had no luck
I don't miss it all that much =

***** The Battle *****

Mars's heart skipped a beat when she heard a scream, thinking there was another Youma attacking before she realized it was Usagi-baka's scream. Her face tightened in anger until the possibility of her hime-sama (princess) being attacked by another Youma. It was then it happened.

"Solar Discus Action!!" A disk of golden energy sliced through the air and through the Youma, disintegrating it.

= There's just so many things
That I can touch I'm torn

I'm all out of faith
This is how I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed
Lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed
Into something real
I'm wide awake
And I can see
The perfect sky is torn
You're a little late
I'm already torn
Torn =

***** With Usagi *****

Tuxedo Kamen lifted a hand to slap Sailor Moon. He never had the chance. A pair of strong hands came from the shadows and pulled Tuxedo Kamen back into the inky darkness from which the sounds of pain and terror came forth. Sailor Moon stopped screaming and began sobbing when Sailor Jupiter rushed over to her.

"Sailor Moon?" the Jupiter-hime asked of the sobbing Tsuki-hime (Moon Princess).

"Mamoru…" she choked out as Tuxedo Kamen was thrown out from the shadows.

= There's nothing where he used to lie
My inspiration has run dry
That's what's going on
Nothing's right I'm torn

I'm all out of faith
This is how I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed
Lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed
Into something real =

"It seems that even the darkest of shadows are repulsed by your actions, coward." A quiet, spectral voice whispered from within the inky darkness of the shadows.

Tuxedo Kamen staggered to his feet, only to be struck down by a shadowy fist.

"Abuser. Coward," the voice accused before it hissed out the most damning accusation, "Rapist!!"

"What are you talking about?!" Sailor Jupiter demanded.

"Quite disturbing, ne? The great Endymion is nothing more than the most base of all cowards. He raped Serenity-hime after he beat her into unconsciousness." The voice stated coldly.

= I'm wide awake
And I can see
The perfect sky is torn

I'm all out of faith
This is how I feel
I'm cold and I'm ashamed
Bound and broken on the floor
You're a little late
I'm already torn
Torn… =

A/N: I need to know what song to use for the next chapter. I'm thinking 'Hero' by Enrique Ingleses (sp?). I'm not sure how long this fic should be. Some ideas would be greatly appreciated.