Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ The Aino Minako Support Group ❯ The Aino Minako Support Group ( One-Shot )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

The Aino Minako Support Group
1/1
by Kihin Ranno
goddess_branwen@hotmail.com
http://www.geocities.com/kihin_ra nno/starlithorizon.html
PG-13

~~Date Started: July 29, 2002~~
~~Date Completed: September 29, 2002~~

Hey minna!! I'm finally putting out another short. ^.^ I know you're
all so excited.

Anyway, the reason I'm writing this is because of two things that
caused me to be literally smacked upside the head with inspiration.
The first being my good friend, Hitsuji, or as I like to call her Sheep
Head. She got an idea for a fic and passed it along to me. That fic
is this! ^.^ The second being the fanfic "Aino Minako and Her
Amazingly Fabulous Search for a Boyfriend" by Moogle and Kate. B. Read
this fic! I love it to pieces! *hugs it* That fic actually has
nothing to do with mine, because it attests to Minako's lack of
boyfriends where as this one deals with the fact that she has had far
too many... But still it give me I nice jolt of inspiration whilst
reading at six AM. Thus, this fic lives.

So it is thereby dedicated to Sheepy, Moogle, and Kate B.

By the way, have I mentioned how wonderfully splendiferous the fic
"Aino Minako and Her Amazingly Fabulous Search for a Boyfriend" is?
Read the fic! I compel you to read the fic!! The power of the
priestess compels you!! *blink*

Okay definitely need to get over the Exorcist...

Anywho, let it also be known that I own neither Codename wa Sailor V
or Bishoujo Senshi Sera Moon. And Moogle and Kate B. don't own it
either, but they still wrote a must read fic called "Aino Minako and
Her Amazingly Fabulous Search for A Boyfriend". However, Takeuchi
Naoko, Bandai, Kodansha, Toei Animation, DiC, Cloverway and scads of
other companies do own those titles and all creativity laced throughout
each. I also do not own "Mary Poppins", Disney does.

That being said, read this fic and then read "Aino Minako and Her
Amazingly Fabulous Search for a Boyfriend" directly afterwards. Enjoy!

~********************************************************** ***********~

In a year that is not known, in a place that could not possibly exist,
with a group of men that most people know absolutely nothing about and
have never heard of sat. The fact that they were sitting of course was
not all that incredible for anyone can sit. The fact that they were all
gathered together in one place could be considered wondrous and
impossible to a scant few, but as it has been stated, this place
couldn't exist, yet it was here. It was quite a paradox, but then what
isn't?

Now the reason that this place could not possibly exist was not because
it was fantastic in any sort of way... It was merely a simply furnished
apartment with slate colored walls, blue carpeting, and old retro
furniture that dated back a good number of decades. There was no
technology that should not exist, and there were no pixies flying
around spreading glittering fairy dust about. There was absolutely
nothing out of the ordinary about this place...

Aside from the men who sat.

Once again, it was not what they were doing... It was who they were and
the fact that they were all gathered together in one room. Now why this
was so special was once again not widely known...

But mainly it was because all but one man was supposed to be dead or in
another dimension, and that one man was supposed to be on another
planet.

And that is how this place could not exist, yet here it was. Not
because of it, because of what it housed. At the moment, it housed four
men, each of different look and personality, but each having the same
basic problem, each here for the same reason...

The first looked to be no more of a boy... And short among the
standards of what women considered the norm for 'tall, dark, and
handsome'... But then he was no dark either. He was fair-haired with
eyes of blue, well-toned, but not overly muscled. He had an air about
him that reeked of being OVERRLY nice (and many many people [mostly
women] would attest to that being true if anyone actually remembered he
had ever existed [which they didn't]). He was a man with a boy's face,
wearing a white polo and khaki pants...

And he was wearing a look of utter fear on his face that was being
caused by another man in the room.

This particular man was a great deal taller, larger, and scarier than
the one before. Scary was used as an adjective, because at this point
in time, he did look very scary. His stony grey eyes were narrowed into
a very distinct glare and his very heavily muscled arms were crossed
about his very broad chest... He blew a strand of a little longer than
shoulder length silver hair out of his face, and then resumed the death
glare. He wore a dark gray button down shirt and black pants, but to
the young blond boy, he may as well have been wearing a leather jacket
with a skull and a bloody dagger going through the top of its head and
holding a glock. He was SCARY.

Not that he didn't have the capacity to be nice... but he obviously did
not like this particular young man.

The other two were umm... Strange to say the least. One had bright
orange hair with red streak oddly reminiscent of a tiger and dark green
eyes. He always seemed to have a self satisfied smirk on his face, and
always held an air of arrogance about him. He was dressed in brown
combat pants and a green tank, holding a motorcycle helmet at his side.
The man next to him, who seemed to be exasperated by his very presence,
had fuchsia colored hair and red eyes... And let it be known that that
hair seemed to stick up on its own with no assistance from gel, mousse,
or hairspray. He had an air about him as well, one that was perhaps a
little arrogant, but he was obviously more intelligent than the man at
his left... He wore a white muscle shirt that was left open to reveal a
skin tight white t-shirt and navy blue pants...

Just then, a young boy ran into the room, his green eyes wide and
perspiration forming on his forehead. All the other men turned to look
at the girlish young boy with silver hair (that was far darker and
radiant than that of the frightening man with the square chin), each
regarding him with a bit of annoyance. He was panting, which further
attested to his weak state... He was by no means a complete weakling,
but he was certainly not as muscled as the other men in the room. He
was actually wearing a light blue tuxedo with a yellow rose sticking
out of his breast pocket. He panted again and swallowed, hoping to
generate the presence of his mouth which was dry as a bone. Then he
laughed nervously and said, "Fans. What can I tell ya?"

The other men all groaned as the boy took his seat, and that is when a
voice spoke up... One that was male, but did not belong to any man in
the room... One that came from a decidedly lower place than the men...
One that was able to hold disdain, sarcasm, and good-natured
friendliness all at the same time.

Needless to say, this was the voice of a very white cat with a gold
crescent moon stamped on his forehead. The fact that a cat was talking
would normally make this place that much more incredibly, but then
considering that all the men in that room were supposedly dead and/or
missing, it was no small wonder that there was a talking cat.

"I know Yaten... Those teenie boppers fawning all over you must be
rough, hm?" he snickered, receiving several death glares. He quickly
cleared his throat and said, "Sorry... Anyway, now that Yaten is here,
we can start,"

The young blond boy sighed and said, "He was late..."

Then the other men all joined in on his sigh and said, "Just like
her..."

The cat blinked and let his jaw drop as much as the laws of nature
would allow, and perhaps a bit farther. This was going to be tough. He
quickly composed himself and said, "Yes well... I can see why all of
you were called here today and why I was chosen for this..." he looked
down and muttered, "Although I'm sure God is having a nice long laugh
at all of our expenses..."

The other men did not hear.

The scary man then spoke up, "We were reborn or returned from some
other realm/planet, with all of our memories in tact, including ones
that certain sniveling cowards would not like me to remember..." he
paused to shoot the poor boy a death glare, and then continued, "And
this time the memory of her and what we have done was not taken from
us. I see no reason in being here, unless I can kill him," he jerked a
thumb in the young blond's direction who began inching away at the
words.

The cat sighed and said, "Kunzite, stop threatening Ace... And the
reason you are all here is because of one Aino Minako," he paused as
all of the men let out woeful sighs and continued once they were
finished, "Yes yes very sad... Anyway, I suppose I should start this
officially or Luna will have me horsewhipped... Welcome gentle man to
the first meeting of the Aino Minako Support Group. A group formed in
order to help you five get over Minako and move on with your
existences."

The man with the purple hair and sighed saying, "Ah the paradox... He
wants me to exist without Minako, but how is that possible? How can
one exist without Aino Minako..."

The man with the orange red hair raised an eyebrow at him and said,
"Man has she ever got you whipped,"

The man from before scoffed and said, "Like you haven't fallen under
the same spell."

The cat sighed and said, "Hawkeye and Tigereye, would you both please
kindly shut your mouths for one moment, and let me continue?" they
complied and then the feline smiled, showing off several very large and
sharp teeth, but still managing to look very pleasant, did just that,
"Now that the formalities are out of the way, I suppose we better get
started... I believe you all know me; I'm Artemis, Minako's guardian."

There was a collective sigh at the mention of her name, but one of them
quickly recovered... That one was Yaten who snorted and said, "What I
wouldn't give for that job... You get to sleep with her,"

Artemis blanched and fell off of the chair he was occupying. He
quickly pulled himself back up and said, "One more word like that and
I'll leave you to your own demons... That, gentleman, would be Kou
Yaten... Yaten, tell us about yourself and a little snippet about what
Minako err... Did to you?" Artemis scratched his head, ignoring all the
men as they sighed once more at her name and continued, "That sounds so
wrong... But oh well. Go ahead Yaten,"

Yaten gave him a strange look, but started, "Well Artemis already said
I'm Kou Yaten... And I am an ex-plaything of Aino Minako," he paused,
half expecting the men to start applauding as he had seen in Seiya's AA
meetings, but they didn't. They only sighed. He shrugged, unscathed,
and continued, "I met her about two years ago, back when she was
sixteen... Then I was able to transform in Sailor Star Healer and
fought evil with her... Well sorta... And when I was just regular old
Yaten, she chased after me, and a crush developed... But she was
simultaneously chasing after my colleagues and band mates, Seiya and
Taiki..." Yaten turned red in the face and leapt to his feet, shouting,
"Seiya, the resident playboy who ran after a friggin' bunny rabbit with
boobs and Taiki, Forehead Man! FOREHEAD MAN! Look at him! He has a
gigantic forehead! I had nothing to compete against, and still she
didn't pay me much mind! Do you have any idea how frustrating that
is?!"

"Yes," the four men all chorused, eyeing each other darkly.

Artemis sighed and said, "They do Yaten, they do..."

Yaten sighed and sat back down, limbs flailing limp at his side, "I
suppose what hurt the most is that Seiya and Taiki were like sisters...
Or maybe brothers to me," Yaten pondered which it was, but quickly gave
up, not wanting to give himself a headache with too much brain activity
and continued, "I always acted really bitchy towards her. I was always
ready with a snide comment and an insult... I suppose I didn't really
like her at all for awhile... It wasn't until that damn idol contest,"

Ace looked up, interested seeing as this sounded very familiar. He
cleared his throat and said, "What idol contest?"

Yaten frowned at the memory and said, "It wasn't long before the last
battle with Galaxia. I already knew she was Venus and she knew I was
Healer. Anyway, she had gotten mixed up into a contest where the prize
was becoming an idol... Sorta... I think it was something like a record
deal and a movie contract or something along those lines. Anyway, I was
one of the judges," Yaten snorted and said, "I don't suppose I was
biased for her, more like against her. Before it started I spotted her
in the sea of girls and managed to get near her, no small task mind
you. I was frustrated with all of Galaxia's crap, and I yelled at her
for being there. It would interfere with her duties as a senshi. After
all, the only reason I was a teen idol was to find Kakyuu, but she
didn't have an excuse...

"But then she started talking about how it was her dream... I was
pissed at her. She was acting like her dream was more important than
the fate of the world...

"Then it came time to audition. I gotta tell ya; she sucked,"

All four men gasped, as if the very notion of it was absurd. Yaten
nodded knowingly, and Artemis face faulted right to the floor...

No one noticed.

Then Hawkeye spoke up, "Impossible! Aino Minako could not fail or be
bad at anything! She is the goddess, and the very personification of
perfection in all things she loves!"

Tigereye raised and eyebrow and made a noise like a whip cracking,
complete with hand motion. Hawkeye made a noise that sounded very much
like 'gak' and then gave Tiger a hard look. Tigereye just continued
staring at him indifferently until Hawkeye said, "You're just jealous,"

"Of what?" Tiger said with a laugh.

"It's not my turn yet," Hawkeye said, turning up his nose. Then he
looked over to Yaten prompting him to continue.

Yaten's face was covered with a very large sweatdrop, but he quickly
shook his head, causing it to vanish. However, he was unable to get rid
of the vein that had popped out on the side of his head, but he carried
on, "Yup she did bite the big one... I mean we're talking bad. Really
bad. She was so bad--"

Artemis growled slightly and said, "All right Yaten. We get it. You
should move on now if you don't want to do your next gig with several
broken bones..." he cocked his head over to the other four who did not
look happy. At all.

Yaten eyed them all warily and gulped, laughing nervously, "At first
anyway. I think my talking to her before it started threw her off a
little... But she was determined to do her best, just to show me up--"

"I think she would have wanted to achieve the dream as well," Tigereye
said matter-of-factly.

Artemis sweatdropped slightly and said, "Trust him on that. He'd know,"

Yaten shrugged and once again continued, "Then after a few moments, she
was wonderful. I couldn't believe it. I knew it was her dream, but I
never actually expected her to be any good--"

"Typical," Hawkeye said, "You obviously don't appreciate her for how
wondrous she is."

Yaten sweatdropped again and said, "Well no I suppose I didn't... That
was my error. But anyway, when it was over, I had to talk to her
again... I can't explain it but I had to. I remember exactly what I
said or the gist of it anyway... I asked her why she tried so hard. I
couldn't understand why one person would put that much effort and
energy into attaining a goal, even though she was going through so much
with Galaxia. I'll never forget exactly what she said to me...

"She said, 'Because I want to answer to everyone's feelings. Usagi told
me to give it my best. My dreams are everyone's dreams. Everyone's
dreams are my dreams.'

"Then I started think... the Starlights and I... We still hadn't found
the princess. We had been looking for what felt like years, and we
still hadn't found her. I was beginning to lose hope, and starting to
feel like we weren't accomplishing anything. I wondered what we were
missing...

"But then Minako said we weren't missing anything. That we were shining
brighter than anyone." Yaten chuckled and said, "She thought that she
just cheered me up, but truthfully... That's when I fell in love with
her."

Then all the men sighed dreamily and another discussion began with Ace,
"Leave it to Minako... She always knows how to cheer people up." those
words were followed by another dreamy sigh. After all, her name had
been mentioned.

Yaten nodded and said, "Yeah... She probably didn't realize it. So, I
went crazy for the next few weeks trying to figure out what to do about
it. Absolutely insane. I mean, here I had hundreds of girls chasing
me everywhere and throwing themselves at me, and she was one of them.
But she was the only one I wanted to have throwing herself at me,"
Yaten paused and said, "And you know there was something different
about her throwing herself at me... I'm not sure if it was the fact
that she'd never... Actually... umm... *do* anything or what, but there
was something different...

"Eh, it was probably because she was the boldest idol chaser I'd ever
met.

"Anyway, so I tortured myself for weeks on end... And then came that
final battle with Galaxia," Yaten looked down, looking like he was
tearing up but wouldn't let himself do it. He sniffed slightly and
said, "Galaxia... Galaxia sent four blasts heading towards me and the
other Starlights... There was absolutely no time to move... But..." he
shut his eyes and said, "But she and the other senshi took the hits.
She took the one that was heading straight for me."

There was absolute silence in the room as Yaten paused to compose
himself. It was amazing... He had not even told this story to Seiya or
Taiki. Taiki would over analyze it and Seiya would probably make a
huge joke about it... And he hadn't wanted to trouble Kakyuu with
something so trivial. But it seemed now, with all these men who shared
his problem or similar problems, that he could say this...

Yaten cleared his throat and said, "I continued that battle... And we
did win. But my thoughts were on Minako the entire time. She had... She
had died for me, and that killed me... Because I had never gotten a
chance to tell her how I felt," he sniffed and paused again. There was
a heavy, solemn silence that hung in the very air. It was as though all
the men knew what he had gone through, knew his feelings. And by
knowing how that crushed him, they too were crushed for him. And for
that brief moment, they all had a common bond, drawn in tears and in
misery...

Then Tigereye ruined it, "Good thing it's impossible to be killed and
stay dead around here,"

Hawkeye nodded and agreed, "Yes, quite fortunate,"

Kunzite growled, eyeing Ace and said, "Well I wouldn't say that always
holds true..."

Ace meeped.

Artemis fell to the floor again. Once again, no one noticed.

Yaten chuckled slightly and said, "Yeah... I can't tell you how happy I
was when I saw her alive again. I would have hugged her right then, but
I couldn't do it with everyone watching..."

Ace spoke up, his voice a few octaves higher than before, "Did you tell
her?"

Yaten nodded, not seeming to notice or care about Ace's predicament, "I
honestly wasn't going to. I thought it might be better for both of us
if she never knew. I was going to leave soon, and I wasn't planning on
coming back. And I didn't want her to be pining away or anything like
that... I couldn't bear that...

"But I told her anyway.

"I spoke to her just before we all went back to Kinmoku. Taiki did the
same with Ami if I recall, but that's not important. Anyway, that's
when I told her I loved her..."

All the other men in the room seemed to stiffen at that. And Kunzite
actually tore his gaze away from Ace to glare at Yaten. Yaten shrank
beneath his gaze, and Artemis realized the boy must have been scared
silent. He gave Kunzite a reprimanding stare, then turned to Yaten and
said, "Go on Yaten,"

Yaten nodded, eyeing Kunzite warily. While Kunzite had taken his eyes
of Yaten, the silver-haired idol could tell that he was most definitely
not happy. But still, Yaten did continue, "Well I had been half
expecting her to shriek with glee... But she just stared at me like
she was in shock. Like there was no possible way I could love her."
Yaten shook his head and said, "I know that's what she was
thinking... I never thought Minako could be insecure, but she was."

There was another collective sigh among the men, this one still dreamy,
but laced with sadness. Artemis sweatdropped and said, "This is going
to happen every time someone says Minako isn't it?" there was another
long sigh, warranting more sweatdrops to appear, "I had to ask,"

There was a moment of silence, until Artemis spoke up again, saying,
"Thank you for sharing that Yaten... But why did you refer to yourself
as a plaything?"

Yaten darkened and said, "Because of Taiki and Seiya! She chased after
those two endlessly! And have I mentioned Taiki's forehead?! It's like
a separate life force! It's the fourth Starlight! It probably has its
own power like, 'Starlit Forehead Blast' or something like that! And
Seiya's just... Oh he's drunk for God's sake! A fall down drunk! Yes,
he wasn't when Minako was fawning over him... Her... But that is so far
beyond the point!"

"Actually it's a good point," Hawkeye pointed out (not realizing that
the man had been referring to the gender issue), "While the object of
all of our affections happens to resemble Mary Poppins in the fact that
she is Practically Perfect in Every Way, she's no psychic,"

Yaten ignored his mistake and glared and said, "I don't care... Seiya
OBVIOUSLY was fawning after that annoying Bunny with Breasts, who had a
boyfriend I might add. But would she leave him alone?! Noooo... Did she
notice Taiki's abnormally sized FOREHEAD, or that he was a better match
for Ami?! Noooo... Did she bother to notice that I was obviously
PERFECT for her?! No--"

Artemis coughed before Yaten could drag out the vowel, and hissed,
"Yaten... Drop it. Drop it now,"

"I thought I'm supposed to talk in these things!" Yaten cried
indignantly.

"There comes a time to be silent unless you want to be hurt. Now shut
your yap unless you wish to be pummeled to death by four angry men,
Artemis said, motioning to the other men who sat... They were red in
the face and not looking at all merciful.

It was now Yaten's turn to make a noise which sounded very much like a
puppy whimpering. He tried to press himself farther into the chair he
was sitting him, as though his gaudy suit could blend into the
furniture.

Finally all the men removed their gazes from Yaten and went back to
what they had been doing before. Artemis cleared his throat and said,
"Well, that was... interesting..." he floundered about for something to
distract their attention away from Yaten. He was so flustered, he did
not automatically think of the obvious, moving on to a different victim
so to speak. And so he sat there stuttering for a good ten minutes or
so, until Tigereye got sick of hearing him talk...

"Artemis, do you want Hawkeye to lament now?" Tigereye said with a very
distinct edge to his voice.

Artemis praised the gods for his arrogance and then gave Hawkeye the go
ahead. Hawkeye was eyeing Tigereye with some sort of form of anger, but
it seemed as though he were all too proper to get really angered with
him. And so he merely shook his head and said, "Well my tale having to
deal with the Aino Megumi herself unfortunately intertwines with Tiger
here... So I suppose our gallant hero that is seated next to me wishes
to get out of having to tell his tale, thus I am stuck telling enough
story to accommodate for two men.

"But I'm rambling,"

"Ya got that right," Tigereye murmured, warranting a glare from his
fuchsia haired companion.

Hawkeye cleared his throat and adjusted his glasses so they fell on the
very tip of his pointy nose. Then he looked up at them and said, "Well
I suppose there's no reason not to begin at the beginning. I first met
Aino Minako when I found her picture in an array of photos we had of
those with dream mirrors that could possibly have Helios hidden
within," he frowned and said, "Well what do you know? The trouble some
thing had some use after all,"

Tigereye coughed and said, "Excuse me, but he's the one who let us live
in Elysion I would prefer if it stayed that way. You want to move
along?"

"Righto," Hawkeye said, doing just as his companion asked of him, "I
was immediately taken with her and decided that she would be my next
target... Little did I know that Tiger had the same idea,"

Tigereye shrugged and said, "Not my fault you didn't talk to me,"

Hawkeye rolled his eyes and said, "Like I'm supposed to clear my ideas
and missions with you before they are begun... Anyway, as I was saying,
"Ms. Aino was to be my next target. So I started to set the whole thing
up by pretending to be a magnificent starving artist named Mr.
Takano... And then I found out Tiger had a similar idea by pretending
to be a rock star wannabe named Mr. Torajima."

"Aspiring you mean," Tigereye corrected, chuckling.

Hawkeye smirked and said, "No no, I believe that wannabe is quite
sufficient in this case,"

Tigereye narrowed his eyes dangerously and said, "Don't make me hurt
you,"

Hawkeye laughed haughtily and scoffed, "As if you could... Anyway, that
is when the battle lines were drawn... So to speak. We made a bet as to
which one would actually win the heart of the fair Minako and who would
get a look at that dream mirror first. Whoever failed would have to
make their departure from the Amazon Trio, thus making it an Amazon Duo
if I'm not mistaken, which I never am,"

"Your arrogance is stifling..." Tigereye quipped through clenched
teeth.

Hawkeye laughed again and said, "You act as though yours is any smaller
than my own. And if you don't wish to hear me speak, why don't you tell
them the story?!"

Tigereye considered his suggestion for all of three seconds before he
actually shrugged and conceded. This was not something any one had been
expecting, but the entire point of being here was to talk... Artemis
had just expected him to sit there and be obnoxious. And here he was
sharing...

My but this was a strange day.

"The long and the short of it is that she accidentally double booked
and had to run between the two of us all day. We captured her, fought
about who would look in the dream mirror, and ended up actually doing
it together. She screamed like a banshee and was decidedly unhappy.
Then she kicked our butts. Bing, bang, boom, end of story."

Okay so it hadn't been as enlightening as Artemis had hoped... Why
hadn't he seen this coming?

Artemis sighed and said, "Yes I remember that day... I wish I didn't,
but I do. God I hate remembering that day..." suddenly he realized he
was being redundant and cleared his throat, reminding himself that he
was the big important guardian who always knew what to say and how to
say it. He was his own person (or feline) and he had to be a rock and
in control. He had to get them to do this correctly.

So he quickly though of what Luna might say and spoke.

"Well you know that you can't get away with just saying that. This is a
support group and you're supposed to be able to express your feelings
and frustrations so that an end can be brought to them and things can
be mended. So would you please care to elaborate on how that makes you
feel?"

Artemis smiled to himself. God he was good.

Tigereye sighed and said, "There's nothing to tell."

Okay maybe not that good. Artemis cleared his throat and said, "Well
did you feel angry when Minako--" the longing sigh interrupted him,
taking Artemis of guard. Once he was sure they were done, he continued,
"...double timed you?

Tigereye shrugged.

Artemis sweatdropped and thought, 'Okay, he's one of those...' he
cleared his throat a little and said, "Did you feel hurt?"

Tigereye shrugged again.

Artemis sweatdropped again, wondering how long this was going to last,
"Did you feel betrayed?"

Tigereye didn't shrug this time... He just stared at Artemis blankly.

My but this was an annoying day.

Artemis sighed and said, "Good lord, what did she ever see in you...?"
the moment the words had left his mouth, Artemis realized he had made a
grave mistake... But all too late.

For then a fire was lit underneath Tigereye and now he was more than
inclined to speak. The orange haired man leapt to his feet, surprising
all present, and he began to scream, "Damn it, why does everyone keep
saying that?! Just because I'm not perfect doesn't mean that she can't
look my way if she wants to! All of you and hundreds more are always
telling me that I don't have a chance with her and that they're amazed
she even gave me a second glance! But she DID! Why can't anyone just
accept my faults? She could! She overlooked them!"

The room fell silent for a moment, no one daring to even breathe in the
wrong direction lest he begin again. They were all staring at him,
their eyes wide with shock. Even Kunzite managed to tear his
threatening gaze from Ace and show surprise to Tigereye. No one's eyes
left the face of the man gone mad...

...until they heard Hawkeye laughing. His voice was snooty and self
satisfied with his face turned upwards and his eyes closed in his own
personal mirth. Then they all turned to him, their eyes growing wider.

Tigereye suddenly sprang forward, gripping the fuchsia haired man he
had sat beside and worked with and lived with for years upon years. His
eyes were wild, like the animal he once was. He shook Hawkeye and said,
"Stop laughing at me damn you! You're the worst of all! At least Fish
as some sympathy!"

Hawkeye suddenly stopped laughing and rose in order to break free and
cried out, "Of course Fish has sympathy for you! You're the one chasing
after the goddess of love embodied in the form of perfection that you
cannot ever grasp!"

"He sympathizes because I can and no one, especially you will believe
in me!"

Hawkeye scoffed and said, "Because I know you don't have a chance with
one as beautiful as her!"

"She double timed on you too! Not just on me!" Tigereye reminded him
spitefully.

Hawkeye sighed and pushed his glasses up to the tip of his nose, "The
goddess only did that in order to spare your feelings my boy... She
does have endless pity and kindness for the underprivileged and
unwanted."

Tigereye was, in a word, livid, and in a series of words, more than
willing to kill Hawkeye and anyone who tried to keep him from doing so.
Hawkeye had this annoying ability to piss Tiger off with seemingly no
effort. Maybe it was just a personality clash, fate getting a few good
yuks, or Hawkeye was purposely trying to aggravate Tiger.

But it was more than likely that it was just a combination of all
three.

And just to prove this theory, Hawkeye remembered something that made
him almost cackle with glee. He turned to Tigereye, his smirk as wide
as the seven seas laid end to end (not that that's possible, but it
gives one an idea of the perspective). Then a gleam formed in his eye
and said, "And I know just how flawless the goddess is..."

Tigereye was downright frightened at the look he was being given, "What
do you mean?"

Hawkeye's grin actually widened (which frightened Tigereye even more)
and he continued, "Remember when I was talking about how I was planning
on getting Minako..." pause to sigh, "... to pose nude for me?"

Tigereye thought about it for all of three seconds before he responded,
"Yeah I think so... Whatever happened with that anyway?"

"She did it,"

A silence fell over the room. No one even dared to breathe after those
words had been spoken... But they did move. Kunzite once again tore his
fiery gaze away from Ace and tuned it to Hawkeye. Tigereye became just
as livid, if not more so, but he sputtered. And Yaten and Ace pretty
much followed suit. Hawkeye was blissfully unaware of all of this and
just basked in the glow of his arrogance.

And Artemis bid another fond hello to the carpet.

Then something changed. Specifically Tigereye's expression. He lost the
anger. The need for destruction vanished. Hawkeye's blood was no longer
appetizing. His face softened...

And his lower lip quivered.

The orange haired man sprang to his feet and he shouted, "This is so
ridiculously UNFAIR!! She falls for the starving artist thing and
passes up the handsome up and coming rock star and actually posed
NUDE?! You can't even draw! Of all the injustices... I did everything
for her. I GAVE UP everything for her. I didn't even kill her when I
saw her again after this happened because I LOVED HER SO!! And now you
tell me that you actually saw her out of those damned overalls?!"

His voice had not been angered, but on the verge of breaking. Now it
did break. Tigereye wept like a woman.

And Hawkeye laughed.

Artemis had a last managed to drag himself back into his chair, his
face very red right now. His back was arched and he was spitting as he
shouted, "Hawkeye, you miserable little liar! Minako told me about what
happened when you asked! She flat out refused!"

Tigereye stopped crying. Hawkeye stopped laughing. Chaos ensued.

"She WHAT?!" Tigereye thundered.

Hawkeye looked up at the taller, stronger, and bloodthirsty man before
him and did laugh again... in fear. He looked around nervously but
soon discovered he would be given no aid. So all he did was giggle
again and say, "Umm... Sorry?"

Then Tigereye knocked him unconscious and sat down beside the man's
prone body.

Artemis actually managed to keep from falling this time, but he did
sweatdrop profusely. He hung his head in utter defeat and said, "And
then there are those that cannot be helped..." he looked over at Ace
and said, "You go next. And please, don't cause any more fights,"

Ace, the blond boy, nodded, eyeing Kunzite nervously. The larger man
was back to intimidating him. He cleared his throat and began, "Oh but
I have so many names..." he said in a futile attempt to lighten the
mood.

No one there actually knew it, but he had taken that line directly from
an American movie called "The Devil's Advocate". He had a terrible
habit of doing that, taking lines, principles, and sometimes entire
monologues from the media.

So far the only one who had caught him was Minako.

Kunzite did not catch the reference, but was annoyed by his words
nonetheless, "I'll give you a new one: bastard," Kunzite murmured
during Ace's pause.

Ace ignored him and said, "I was known to her for a time as Saijou A...
Later, she knew me as Kaitou Ace. Think Tuxedo Kamen in white and
throwing cards instead of roses... And cuter at that,"

Kunzite merely snorted this time and allowed Ace to continue, feeling
he had shown his contempt and annoyance sufficiently. "However, I did
work for Beryl and the Dark Kingdom. And there I was known as
Danburite. I worked under stone face over here."

Kunzite merely gave him 'a look' and Ace decided that he really
shouldn't call him that ever again if he planned on living.

"...But my story goes back farther than that... it all began in the
Silver Millennium, back when I was in the Venusian Army. Being in the
army and being of my status, I got to be around her a lot... And from
that I developed a... uh..." Ace let his voice trail off as he
struggled to find the correct words to describe this.

Kunzite did it for him, "Obsessively unhealthy infatuation?"

Ace sweatdropped and said, "Unrequited love for Minako," all men (save
Hawkeye who was still unconscious) once again sighed woefully at her
name, "Unfortunately she was taken by a man who would ultimately betray
her," he shot Kunzite a hard look, which the man was happy to answer.

"You turned over just as quickly as I did!" Kunzite shouted, getting to
his feet, "And don't you dare presume to know why I did what I did!"

Ace narrowed his eyes and stood, trying to appear more powerful;
although that situation was hopeless considering that he was at least a
foot and a half shorter than Kunzite. And he did have the face of a
little boy... Not to mention Kunzite was still scary, "All I know is
that she did love you! And you betrayed her and the kingdom! Yes I did
the same thing, but I didn't end up pitted against her in the moon's
last stand!"

"No but you were a thousand years later!" Kunzite shouted, seething.
He could not believe this mere slip of a boy who had no knowledge of
him or his past could accuse him of anything when he had done no better
than he.

Ace narrowed his eyes and said, "I didn't kill her..."

Artemis knew now was the time to intervene, right before Kunzite lost
what little self restraint he was clinging to and tore the man/boy limb
from limb and then do despicable things to his lifeless remains once
that was over and done with. He set his small furry face into a frown
and sternly said, "Ace. Kunzite. Enough. We are not here to argue. This
is a support group, not a brothel. Sit down." the men regarded each
other angrily for a moment, both looking like they were more than ready
to spring upon the other at any given moment... The other two men
looked poised to jump in and tear the two apart if necessary... Or
maybe join in on the fight. Whatever they felt like. But eventually a
silent agreement passed between them and they did sit down.

Artemis sighed in obvious relief and let his heart slow down. Once he
was sure that he would not fly into another coronary should he so much
as speak he cleared his throat and said, "Kunzite, please try and
control your comments... They don't help at all," he looked at the
former dark king, half expecting to get an answer from him. But of all
he got out of him was an icy stare.

Then Hawkeye awoke and was about to ask what was happening. Tigereye
didn't feel like talking to him right now and knocked him out again.

The cat let out another sigh, this one of exasperation (a welcome
change from all the longing ones that had been breathed as of late),
and said, "Go on Ace..."

Ace nodded and said, "Anyway... Later on, one thousand years later, I
was given a second chance... But I blew it,"

Yaten, who for once in his life was actually listening, said, "What do
you mean?"

Ace sighed and said, "I was seduced once again, by Beryl... The first
time... I might have had an excuse... But the second time..." Ace shook
his head and muttered, "Fool me once shame one you. Fool me twice shame
on me I suppose... Of course I had no memory of the first time until I
was taken in by that witch. Then suddenly it all came flooding back.
Then I wanted to make amends... To her and the rest of the female
population, as if that would do any good. Apologizing for something I
was doing and would continue to do instead of what I had done.

"But I did it... And to accomplish the feat, I became a picture perfect
idol who was everything women wanted. I knew it would draw Minako to me
like a moth to a flame... It was an evil scheme, yes. But it was also
my last desperate attempt to have her. And that drive to have Aino
Minako as my own drove me more than Beryl ever could.

"It worked perfectly. Minako easily won a contest for who was to be my
leading lady in my next film. She was contestant number 23... I still
remember that," he chuckled slightly and said, "Sad isn't it?"

"Yes," Kunzite muttered bitterly.

Ace sighed, "Very well then... We ended up going to China... And I did
romance her a bit, I'll admit... God she was only 13 at the time.
Anyway, I was working with another woman from the Dark Kingdom... And
of course our mission was to rid the earth of Sailor V. I was pitted
against her... And she killed me. But not before I read her the final
love fortune," he closed his eyes and seemed to pull out a card from
midair. Then he flipped it around and revealed it, mumbling, "The Ace
of Hearts,"

"You cursed her," Kunzite growled.

Ace sighed and threw the card away, accidentally cutting off a lock of
Hawkeye's hair as he awoke. Tigereye, out of the goodness of his heart,
knocked him out again, so he wouldn't have to see it. Ace ignored that
and Artemis throwing himself out of his chair to see if that would kill
him and said, "I did _not_ curse her. It's part of the blessing/curse
of the Ginzuishou. The Sailor Senshi live forever, but they can never
really find true love,"

"Bull shit," Kunzite hissed.

Artemis was about to jump in there, but Ace didn't give him much of a
chance. "It's the truth! Her duty is solely to her princess! Anything
else would get in the way! Especially when the one she did love
betrayed her _and_ killed her!"

Kunzite leapt to his feet once more, grabbing the smaller man by the
collar. His silver eyes, usually holding a calm smoldering contempt for
Ace were now a light with rage. And for once, Ace did not shudder in
fear.

"Don't you DARE talk about it like that! You don't have a clue about
what you're talking about! The only reason I joined Beryl was because
of her!

"Beryl threatened to kill her! She threatened to go to the Venusian
Kingdom and devastate the entire planet! She threatened to take down
the Moon Kingdom! She said if we, all of the Shitennou, joined the
ranks of the Dark Kingdom, she wouldn't attack the other kingdoms...
And fools that we were, we believed her. I betrayed my prince, his
kingdom, the moon, his princess, and my own! Don't you think that
haunts me every night and every day?! Don't you think I hate myself
enough without you lording it over me every day of my life?!"

All was silent in the room. Hawkeye had woken up again somewhere within
that monologue, but Tigereye was so engrossed in it he didn't notice.
Yaten was looking around for Artemis as if he'd be able to help this
situation. But Artemis was still on the floor, too shocked to say a
word.

And Ace was guilty.

All these years Ace had just assumed that the man had turned on Minako
because he didn't love her. But now he realized it had been the exact
opposite. He didn't know why he had never even thought of that
possibility, but whatever the reason he hadn't. And now he had nothing
more to do than feel like crap about the whole situation.

"Kunzite I..." Ace began softly.

The grey man just dropped him back into his chair and took his seat.
His face was still set into a scowl, but it was now directed at the
carpet, not Ace.

Artemis has somehow gotten back into his chair (and was now bound and
determined to stay in it) and said, "Well I suppose that takes care of
Kunzite's story... Umm... Ace. Why did you go over to Beryl's side
anyway?"

Ace looked down and muttered, "Metallia... she... promised I could have
Minako..."

No one sighed. No one said a word. But no one moved to kill him.

Artemis sighed and shook his head sadly, "Here I always thought that's
what she told the both of you... I suppose not...

"Well anyway, now we all know exactly how we got here. Now my job is to
see that you eventually get out of here."

"And how do we do that?" Yaten asked, bored now that nothing
interesting was happening.

"Getting over Minako,"

Once again no sigh. Instead they all leapt to their feet and started
shouting.

"The hell I will!"

"What are you? Insane!"

"Blasphemy... Heresy!"

"Never in a million years!"

"Do you want to die cat?"

Artemis meeped... Because the last had been spoken by Kunzite and the
man now had him by the throat.

"No no, don't kill the cat..." Yaten said, taking Artemis from Kunzite
and plopping him into his chair without ceremony, "I like cats."

"Besides she'd kill you," Tigereye supplied, having forgotten about
pounding Hawkeye into mincemeat.

"Kill? Kill?! That wondrous woman has not a mean or vicious bone in her
body! she would not harm a flea!" Hawkeye shouted, apparently
forgetting about all the youma she had killed and what happened that
day when she had two timed the both of them...

And Tigereye stopped forgetting. Now he was just practicing an amazing
amount of self control.

Artemis shook his head and said, "All right then... We won't worry
about that right now. In the meantime, you five have to learn to
co-exist. So far, the only one who isn't involved in a conflict is
Yaten, and he has Seiya and Taiki to deal with. Now you all share a
bond... Can't you all just get along?"

Artemis waited for a resounding no... But it never came. He looked up
and sadly fell out of his chair yet again when he realized what was
happening...

They were THINKING.

Each man looked from one to the other. Their eyes for once held no
malice... but a look of realization. Perhaps it could even be called
enlightenment. It was a shocking thing to see.

Yaten was the first to speak, "You know..."

"He does have a point," Ace finished, nodding.

Hawkeye furrowed his brow and said, "You know... We all did have a
relationship with her at one time or another,"

"Thank you Albert Einstein. Any more brilliant insights?" Tigereye
said, rolling his eyes.

"No I think I see where he's going with this," Yaten said. Hanging
around Taiki had forced him to think just so he understood what the
brunette was saying. He was used to deciphering cryptic words. "If she
did have feelings for us at one time..."

"Maybe she could have them again?" Kunzite whispered.

"But the Ginzuishou..." Ace began. He shook his head and said, "Oh
forget that. Forget that damn love fortune!" he pulled out another on
of his Ace of Hearts and ripped it in two, "There's five of us! Surely
there's one she can fall in love with!"

"And in the meantime, we can help set up dates with Minako!" Yaten

shouted enthusiastically.

They all sighed.

"Yes that's right!" Hawkeye said happily, "We can work together in
order to snare the fair goddess into our hearts!"

"What he said," Tigereye muttered with another roll of the eye.

"Hey as long as it works..." Ace said with a smile.

"Of course it'll work," Kunzite said with the ghost of a smile (which
almost caused Ace to have a coronary), "Teamwork and working together
produces more results than working alone or a team that can't agree
on anything. Look at the Americans,"

"Good point," Ace said smiling brightly. Then something strange
possessed the boy and he cried out, "Group hug!"

Surprisingly all agreed... Well all but Kunzite who punched Hawkeye
when he went to hug him. Poor thing got knocked out again.

"One step forward. One hundred steps back." Ace muttered.

Tigereye went over to see if Hawkeye was okay.

"Then again..." Yaten said with a smirk.

Artemis hadn't noticed that last part. He was too busy sobbing. He
padded over to the group and said, "That was so beautiful... And
inspiring! I have a confession to make..."

Kunzite snorted and said, "What? Don't tell me you love Minako too?"

"Yes actually,"

Hawkeye sat up straight as a board. Tigereye fell over in a dead faint.
Yaten and Ace let go of each other and gawked. Kunzite just shook his
head.

"I knew it,"

"That's sick man... err... cat. Whatever,"

"You're a cat! You can't love a human! That's just... so very wrong in
so very many ways..."

"Holy crap! There isn't more to that sleeping together thing than
just... Oh that's disgusting!"

"Well great! There's an image I really want to take to bed with me!
Thank you very much!"

"You're a vile and disgusting feline Artemis."

"You sicken me."

"Can I kill him now?"

"Wait until Tigereye gets up. He'll want to help,"

Artemis sweatdropped and hung his head again. So much for this support
group.

After a few more comments similar to the ones above, the subject was
changed. "Hey I just thought of something," Yaten said.

"Shocker," Artemis muttered so no one heard.

"What happens when she chooses one of us though?" Yaten questioned.

"Then we kill him so she can move onto the next one until only one's
left," Kunzite supplied.

"Now there's a plan!" Tigereye shouted.

"Yes, yes, that seems quite suitable," Hawkeye agreed, pushing his
glasses up on his nose.

"Works for me," Yaten said with a shrug.

"God help me," Ace murmured.

That was when the door flung open and a very familiar voice called out,
"Hey! What are you guys doing in here anyway?"

All eyes and ears turned to the door... And all nearly passed out when
they saw who it was.

There, standing in the doorway with the light pouring in behind her so
she seemed all the more angelic was Aino Minako. Her smile was bright
and cheerful, completely oblivious to what had been transpiring just
before she entered. Her eyes were bright and shining and her hair
caught the light as she moved through the door.

Then she blinked and the effect was ruined. Or maybe it was ruined by
her next words, "Artemis, why are you banging your head against the
wall?"

"To distract myself from the pain," the cat said through clenched
teeth.

Minako just shrugged and said, "Whatever you say fuzz butt," then she
jogged over to Ace, whose face was taking a great interest in perusing
the ceiling. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pouted cutely,
"Ace... I've been waiting outside for twenty minutes so you can be done
with... whatever this is. Now come on I'm bored and we're going to miss
our reservations if you don't hurry,"

All eyes turned to Ace. They were back to being angry. Ace meeped again
and said, "Well I umm... That is... I..." he sighed, defeated and said,
"We're almost done here Minako,"

Minako smiled brightly and said, "Good!" then she turned to the other
guys and flashed another dazzling movie star smile at them and said,
"Hey boys! How's it going?"

Artemis groaned and said, "Why do you think I'm banging my head on the
wall?"

Minako turned and said, "Well you said to distract yourself from the
pain. Although now that I think of it, that doesn't make much sense.
But who am I to question my all knowing guardian... Oh! That reminds
me!" she ran over and picked Artemis up quickly but with the instinct
and knowledge of a cat owner, "I need to talk to you!"

Then she walked out of the room, shut the door, and left Ace alone...

Minako set Artemis down on the floor in the hallway outside. The door
to the room she had just been in was marked AMSG. She wanted to ask
what it stood for, but moved on to more relevant matters, "So what do
you think?"

"Of what?" Artemis said with a sigh as he rubbed the red bump forming
on his head.

"They guys! Do you think they still like me?"

Had Artemis been in his chair, he would have fallen out of it. Instead
he shrugged as best as he could and said, "I'd say its a possibility."

Minako giggled happily and said, "That's so cool! I kind of like all of
them too, but I just can't decide which one I like best..." she giggled
and said, "I suppose I'll just have to date all of them until I
decide."

Artemis sweatdropped profusely and clenched his teeth. "Mina..."

The blonde giggled again and said, "I'm only kidding Artemis! Well
partially. This time they're going to know that I'm dating all of them
and they'll all have to vie for my affections! Oh Mako-chan will be SO
jealous when she finds out that five guys are fighting over me!" she
flashed him his patented V is for Victory sign. "Well I better go get
Ace. I'll see ya later fuzz butt!"

Artemis shook his head as he watched Minako go back into the room. If
the blonde really wanted to go through with that plan... Well it wasn't
going to make his life any easier.

Suddenly Artemis heard a crash from the room across the hall. He spun
around and stared at the door marked TUSG. Then he heard a familiar
yowl followed by a few curses.

Artemis smiled wickedly. He chuckled slightly and said, "Then again at
least I don't have Luna's job..."

~********************************************************* ************~

I know what you're thinking... the anime and the manga hath been mixed
and now I must die, Right?

Wrong. Because I have theories!

My personal theory is that the anime version of Sailor V and the manga
version could have easily happened at the same time. That Ace could
have exited along with Alan and Katarina. No I say COULD have, because
of course there is absolutely no proof.

Now, some of you from ASMR know that I am writing a fic called "Mask of
Lies" which puts this theory to the test. This fic, while also
presenting that theory, is a bit of a teaser to that one... Although it
takes place afterwards. ^.~

Kooky ain't I?

Oh and I would like to credit Hitoshi Doi for some of the translations
I threw in here. The site is http://www.tcp.com/doi/smoon/smoon.html
if you want to check it out. It's not much for eye candy, but it has
the most information I've seen in one site. Warning, there are a ton
of spoilers for Stars (seeing as the episodes are summarized).