Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ The Letters Collection ❯ Love Always, Serenity ( Chapter 3 )

Love Always, Serenity

 

Dearest Mother,

I've never forgotten you, you were always in my heart, but today I met Luna for the first time in a thousand years. Literally! She sparked some remembrance of my past life with you on the moon. Remind me to tell the main computer on the moon to update those cryos-chambers, Luna's forgotten most of her memory! She's looking for the Moon Princess and says that I'm Sailor Moon! Me! A Scout! It's an old story but proven true, I can transform.

Now that I remember, I can't wait to find my Scouts! My bestest friends! I know I've seen Amila- Ami now- and she's still so smart! And you might not know of her, I know you're watching over me from heaven, or the moon, being that to me, they are one and the same, but I think Minaryse is the Sailor V character from movies! V could be for Venus, right? And the white cat she's always with? Gotta be Artemis!

All right, don't take offense, Mother, but I kinda hope you're not watching me anymore. I'll send my letters to the moon but don't get to know your daughter in this incarnation. She's terrible. If I was refined and delicate and proper then, a thousand years has worn the formality right out of my bones. Take my word for it, you won't be proud of who I am now. But now that I'm remembering my past, I hope I'll become more like you soon.

Now to find Endymion . . .

 

Love always,

Your little princess,

Bunny Serenity

 

 

Dearest Mother,

You must have seen this coming. I met my daughter today. Rini, Serina, Neo-Princess Serenity of the earth and moon. In a thousand years, Darien and I will have rebuilt a kingdom like the Silver Millennium and our daughter, Rini, will be born on my twenty-first birthday.

Mother, I know this should be a joyous revelation, I should be ecstatic to know this of our future but, not only does thoughts of the future give me a terrible feeling- I had a horrible premonition the other night, I'll right it down later. It's too disturbing to think of now. Anyway, knowing what I have to do in the future, knowing I have no choice- I love Rini too much to change a single moment of what must come to pass- But, Mother, I had such dreams for the future. Most important to me is marrying Darien, and having a family someday with him. But, not so soon. I wanted to see the world. Darien was to show me his beautiful planet. I wanted to go to school, to college, to excel and prove Miss H and Reianna wrong, to show Amila what I really can do and to be an excellent daughter to my family here. I wanted to teach children and save people's lives, and become a model or singer with Minaryse, or go into a baking business with Litanya. But, now, knowing what the future holds for me- how can I? It's all planned and set out. Darien and I will be so busy getting married, creating our kingdom, and- children- that I will never leave our castle again after she is born. I know this and it hurts me, so much.

Mother, will Rini ever understand what dreams I've given up for her? I hope, in her teenage years when I know she will get fed up with me, that she will remember all the things I wanted to be and do and . . . cannot because I love her too much. In this letter, to you and the moon, Mother, I lay my dreams. Keep them safe for me, that I may return to see them again someday.

 

Love always,

Bunny Serenity

 

 

Oh, Mother!

If I thought setting dreams aside was painful, Darien shattering my only dream left is hundred times worse! Oh, Mama, he says he doesn't love me anymore, that his feelings have changed- But I know that can't be true, it can't be so long as Rini is alive, she's our daughter. Mama, I can't take it, I can't handle all this! I would give anything to just disappear off this earth forever, Mother, take me back to the moon, I beg of you! Rini will never exist if Darien doesn't love me, I will not wish to exist any longer once this fact is proven to me but- but I just can't believe it, Mama. I won't believe it!

Bunny

 

 

Dear Mother,

Every day seems to grow worse. I thought time healed all wounds? Each day my heart falls deeper away from the sunlight, the ache in my chest splits more and more. I see only darkness in my dreams of the future. I'm so sorry, I should have never said I regretted Rini being born- I'm so sorry! I would give anything to have that future now! Please, if you have any power left, Mother, don't let this be true. Don't let Rini disappear and Darien leave me forever, please, Mama.

The battles grow worse and life darker and heavier. My friends don't know what to do, Luna is going crazy, and my mom doesn't understand. I have no one to confide in, Mother. Except you, and you are only the recipient of a letter sent to the memory of the moon.

I must go, my daughter calls me. I know how much you loved me, Mother, and I hope Rini knows that I love her just as much.

 

Love always,

Bunny Serenity

 

 

Ilene walked in, a pile of papers in her hand. The sheets were nearly yellow with age, the inch-wide rule reminded Serina of kindergarten; the huge, childish handwriting was definitely a four-year-old Serina's.

 

"Serina, these are yours." Ilene handed half the stack to her daughter rather curtly. Stunned, she took them, dropping them on her desk to read. She only picked up the first one and the one on the bottom. 'Dear Mommy, today was the first day of school. I don't like it. It's fun and I made lots of friends but there are rules and evil people called teachers and they tried to make me do things like 'add' and write letters-' 'Dear Mommy, something terrible has happened. I won't be able to write you for a long time. Auntie Puu came to visit me tonight. She said I won't see her again and that I can't go find my friends and I have to forget about being me-' Serina's eyes anxiously glanced up to her mother's but she refused to meet her gaze. The older woman stared up at the ceiling, her eyes glittering with memories as she held the rest of the papers close to her chest.

 

"You were always exceptionally bright for your age. I thought these letters were proof- at three and four you could write complete sentences, whole letters, with perfect spelling. The only reason your handwriting was so poor was because the pencils were too big for your tiny hands." Ilene almost choked on her half-laugh, memories of her little girl now gone so long ago in the past. "But you always wrote of things you told me anyway, you kept these letters like a diary, letters to an imaginary friend, not to me. But, they were always addressed to 'Mommy' . . ."

 

Frozen, tears creeping into her eyes to see her mom so sad and frightened of what had happened to make her mother like this, Serina didn't have enough breath to barely whisper. She quickly tried to stand- "Mama . . ."

 

"And now these letters too." Ilene's brown eyes snapped down to her eldest child's, thrusting the newer papers in front of her. "You write of impossible things as if they were reality happening now, not the daydreams of teenage girl. These are terrible things you should never have imagined. But this isn't an imaginary friend, is it? These were letters to heaven, letters to 'the moon'. To someone I don't really know exists or not. But I don't think- I- Your- you're not really my daughter."

 

Serina's world came crashing down; she couldn't reach her mother fast enough as she merely released the new letters into her care. "You're a princess. From a long ago fairy tale, your mother was a queen, and all these horrible things really did happen. You're a Sailor Scout too. One of the those poor little girls who have to run around the city at ungodly hours fighting those evil creatures- I don't know who you are . . . You can't be my little girl anymore . . . I never knew- you died, and I never knew!"

 

"Mom," Serina didn't know what to say or do. She dropped the letters, all ready knowing what they were- she'd written often in the last year- and hugged her mother as tight as she could. Ilene tried to push her away but she was crying so hard it was a futile effort but it got Serina started too. All Serina could think was about how her mother knew- knew everything! And this was the first time she mentioned it? How long had she known? 'How did she find out? How did she find these? Those stupid letters!' When Serina thought of all the things she'd written down, so many personal things she'd never wanted anyone to know- "Mama, I'm so sorry . . ."

 

"There's nothing to be sorry about. You can't help who you are- It's like the last fifteen years were a lie . . ."

 

"No, not a lie, just a- a play, a dream that's not quite real. But that's how I felt when I found out, when I remembered and Luna said I couldn't say anything, I couldn't tell anyone, even you. I knew you'd worry or the bad guys would try to hurt you. But I am your daughter, you and dad are my parents and Sammy's my brother. It's kinda like you adopted me before I was born, you're my family now."

 

"And all that's happened to you this year?" Ilene pulled away and searched her daughter's eyes. The unidentified horror and pain there made her frown, her brow creasing with growing agony. Her daughter should never have felt such intense emotions, not now, when she was so young, not anything that would make her grow up so fast!

 

She'd fallen in love, fought battles, gotten hurt, gotten her friends hurt, even DIED! She'd been helpless in attacks and the only reason they'd won them, she'd seen the future, she'd lost her boyfriend so many times and now it might seem forever but- she had a daughter . . . There was so much her little girl had been dealing with, struggling through in the past year- her whole life and longer- and she'd never even had a clue. She'd blamed it on school and her failed relationship with her boyfriend- she could never get Serina to talk about it, but she always wrote it down in those letters . . .

 

"It's all true. Everything you read, from the Scouts and battles, to Darien, Rini, and my being the Moon Princess." Serina looked away, moving to her bed to sit down. "Yes, I died, once, but when I wished to return, it was to you. To you and my friends and the ordinary life I loved so much. It's just- that couldn't last forever . . . My destiny is different and this world needs me, it needs all of us to protect it from the people who want it." Serina looked up. "Can you understand that?"

 

"I can, but I don't want you to fight anymore." Ilene stepped over and sat next to her on the bed.

 

Serina grimaced- somehow she knew that was coming. But that didn't mean she knew how to respond. "I don't have a choice, Mom, but don't worry. I'm always careful. The Scouts and Darien are there just to protect me-"

 

"But they can't always- When you lost that one time-"

 

"But I came back, I'll always come back for you, Mom." She hugged her, her warm tears slowly stopping, her mother's still glistening in her eyes.

 

"You don't have confide just in your letters now." She whispered softly. "I'll be here too. I love you, my little princess."