Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ The Tale Of The Fair Ogress And The Puss In Boots ❯ The path to Hell is paved with good intentions, what is the path to Heaven paved with, then? ( Chapter 8 )

The path to Hell is paved with good intentions, what is the path to Heaven paved with, then?

 

 

Disclaimer: Don't own anything but this funny (I hope) cocktail... I was wondering. Now, a cocktail is an (usually) alcoholic drink, which is quite often drunk by women because it has a sweeter taste than beer or a pure liquor. And well, everyone knows that alcohol makes people a lot less inhibited... So, is it a coincidence that a word used to refer to this kind of beverage is formed by cock and tail? Sorry, that's just an example of the weird thoughts that go through my mind at 0030 a.m.

Oh, yeah, and there will be a few hints at `Alice in Wonderland' by Lewis Caroll and `The Lord of the Ring' by J.R.R. Tolkien, in this chapter and probably in the followings. Hum, `Terminator' and Battle Athletes' too. Don't sue me, I have flies to feed and take care of, while already threatened by debts and being currently jobless...

 

 

 

 

“Women are so foolish!” The prince snorted after watching the recent developments in the magic mirror, a few meters away from the swing where he was sitten. “They let their heart lead their life instead of using their head. That's why men are in charge! Don't you think so, darling?”

 

Endymion turned his head to glance at Fiore who was pushing him from behind. When their eyes met, time slowed down, the background turned pink with delicate bubbles, piano music was playing and the scent of roses and fertilizer became overpowering. They were the true embodiment of heavenly bliss.

 

Setsuna watched sweat dropping the henchmen discreetly holding the pink panels behind the two men, blowing soap bubbles and perfume around them and playing music. She wondered what a story would become without them.

 

Endymion snapped out of it. “Anyway, I wonder who would try to prevent this quest from succeeding!”

 

Setsuna opened her mouth only to shut it firmly when Fiore shot her a murderous glare.

 

“Probably some court intrigue.” Fiore cooed. “It is no wonder that such a handsome and charming prince like you, my love, is jealoused. I've never trusted this Duke of Kakkyu for instance... What was his name already? Seya? Believe me, dear, someone who spends so much time disguising himself as a woman is trouble!”

 

“Yes, yes, you are right, as usual, love...” Endymion slowed the swing until it came to a stop and let Fiore help him up. “I shall keep an eye on him. Actually, I'm going to take care of this matter right now since I have nothing else to do while you'll be tending to your duties” He looked back at the mirror. “Setsuna, you come with me!”

 

Fiore's eyes narrowed while watching his lover leave. Endymion's tone had been a bit too... eager... Oh, well, Seya was just another little troublemaker he'd have to take care of. With a frightening laugh, he turned around, his robe swirling in his wake.

 

-------------------------------------------

 

The group of women was going through a dark, thick forest. From time to time, when the tree were a bit more spaced, they could see the high white tops of the mountainous chain known as the Allpinneds they were heading to. The sun was setting and the Allpinned seemed to cruelly saw a bleeding sky. They had decided to stop and camp at the feet of those ageless giants of stone and ice.

 

“Actually,...” Ami piped in “... mountains are the result of the friction between two landmasses. One slowly, oh-so-slowly slides underneath the other, plunging in the incandescent depths of our mother earth, while the other is left with little choice than arching up to the sky where lazy clouds will caress it. This relentless grinding, of course, generates energy and shocks that can be felt on all the line of contact and more than often up to the surface. Those are earthquakes, which can be multiple and of different magnitude. However, the most spectacular phenomenon is probably volcano eruptions which are the true embodiment of all this pent-up energy suddenly exploding in a geyser of primal plasma! Yes! A climax of geological dimension...” The passion written on the young doctor's face was truly a sight to behold. Her cheeks were flushed with the cutest of blushes and her eyes, lost in the ecstasy of nature wonders, were sparkling like stars...

 

“Wow! I wish Ami had been my teacher at school...” Donkey Pelt and Makoto found themselves saying together, the later even letting a trickle of drool escape her mouth.

 

“SIGH!!!”

 

All at once, they turned to the fourth member of their merry group, who had been sighing like that for hours now. Makoto was seriously considering knocking her out and carrying her the rest of the way. These sighs were dangerously grating on her nerves.

 

“Ami, I was wondering... Why did you decide to accompany us, anyway?” Donkey Pelt asked in an effort to shake off the gloomy mood that had settled on the group. Actually, it was mainly centered around Michiru, her immediate surroundings bathed in darkness.

 

Ami cast a careful glance at her tall lover. “Hum... Let's say that where Mako goes, I go too...”

 

“Ohh, that's so sweet...” The oblivious servant turned then to Makoto. “So why did you come, then?”

 

“This quest has been ordered by Prince Endymion, right?”

 

“Yeah...”

 

“Well, I happen to have some unfinished business with him... I made him a promise a long time ago, and I'd like to be able to repay my... debt....” The giant was doing her best to ignore the slightly reproachful glare of her lover. “And I need to see him for that.”

 

“Ohh, you're a lady of honor, I see...” Donkey Pelt beamed.

 

Makoto sweat dropped. “Well, I am a princess, after all, even if I much prefer running my little inn...”

 

Donkey Pelt nodded in complete understanding. “Yes, it's such a lovely place, although I wonder why a princess would need to work...” She completely missed the cringe that swept on the tall brunette's face.

 

Silence stretched once again, Makoto joining Michiru in the very private Negative Vibes Emitters club.

 

“Did I say something?”

 

Suddenly, a shrieking and familiar laugh made itself known “Hohohhohohohohhohoohoooo!!!!”

 

“Oh! Santa Klaus is here!” Donkey Pelt was clapping her hands in glee and jumping up and down.

 

“Pumpkin?!?” The others exclaimed.

 

“Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, hooo!!! Yes, I am back. I went through hell, but now, I'm ready to take my revenge on you! I'll make you suffer twice what I had to endure because of your treachery!” She pulled the bean purse out of her cleavage once again... and glasses. Pink glasses, banana-shaped. She looked like a teacher with them on her nose. Okay, a hot teacher with ugly spectacles, but a teacher non-the-less. She took a bean and a little piece of paper out of the purse. “All right! What does it say?» She squinted her eyes, trying to decipher the crappy handwriting. «Mmmh... a) open the purse following the diagram - checked b) select a bean - checked c) throw it to your intended victim with an elegant flick of the wrist...” She threw it, the other girls calmly watching it land a few meters ahead of them. “And now... d) wet it with the miniaturized watering-can included in the package and wait...” She blinked, then looked inside the purse and pulled out the mini-watering-can. She looked at it, then at the bean, then at the watering-can again and back at the bean.

 

The girls were still waiting, vaguely wondering what kind of course Pumpkin could teach.

 

She sighed. Why, oh why were the user's guides always so stupid!

 

Pumpkin took a big breath and started her desperate sprint towards the damned magic bean. She ran like an antelope with a lioness (come on, if it was a lion, she wouldn't have to, he would be to occupied yawning...) on her tail, her arms outstretched behind her like angel wings, hair floating behind her. Her technique was perfect, she was faster than the wind, faster than the sound. She could hear the public cheering her as she neared the arrival of the race. Suddenly, everything faded into darkness as light welcomed her in a gentle embrace. Pumpkin smiled, tears in her eyes at the beauty laid before her. So that was it, the famous light her mother had talked about.

 

“MUD SUBMERGE!!!”

 

The shout was followed by a filthy ball of mud that hit Pumpkin head on. The mercenary was launched in air better than if she had been sitting on millions of liters of trinitroglycerine, her cry of pain and dismay deformed by the Doppler effect. She was still screaming when she came back from her short but very educational spatial flight and blew a crater in the ground.

 

The girls looked at Michiru in wonders.

 

“Oh wow!” Exclaimed Makoto with new respect in her voice “What was that?”

 

“My oh-so-great special power.” Grumbled the young ogress in response. “Now, shall we continue on our wonderful and merry quest?” Not really expecting an answer, she strode off to the mountains, not sparing a glance to the bloody goop in the crater.

 

The other girls wordlessly followed her.

 

------------------------------------------------------

 

A while later, Pumpkin painfully extracted herself from the ground. She was partly burnt and blood streaked down her face. One of her eyes glowed red as she stared in the direction the girls had taken. “I'll be back!” She vowed in a raucous voice.

 

Vibrating with strength of impact, an arrow dug itself in the trunk of a tree just beside her, grazing her left cheek. “The hell...!”

 

A quite plump woman jumped out of the bushes she was hiding in. She had platinum curly blond hair. She was carrying a bow and wore nothing but some kind of white towel that covered only the essentials, and a big smile. “Woops! Did I scare you? I'm so sorry!”

 

“Who the hell are you?!?” Yelled Pumpkin.

 

“Oh! My name's Erotica. I'm Cupid's new apprentice...” Erotica replied cutely, batting her eye-lashes enticingly.

 

“What the...! Aren't your arrows supposed to be harmless!?!?!”

 

“Oh Cupid's are. But I'm only an apprentice, so I only get to use plain ones for now. Who knows which kinds of horrors would happen if every new apprentice got to shot love arrows everywhere! It would be the anarchy! He sent me training in this forest and I'm happy to say that I've greatly improved.” She gestured at a mount of dead preys behind her that Pumpkin hadn't noticed until now.

 

Pumpkin paled. “B-b-b-b-but... Why are you shooting at me!”

 

Erotica blushed, pressing one hand on one of her healthy cheeks. “Well, I saw you in the forest and I found you sooo pretty!” She drew another arrow while openly checking out the poor green-haired woman. “However, I could feel the hurt and loneliness in your heart. It simply draws me to you and compels me to shot everything I've got to you until this hole in your heart is filled.”

 

“You're gonna KILL ME!!!” Pumpkin screamed hysterically while backing away when she saw Erotica aiming at her again.

 

“Let me fill your heart! I know I can make it better...”

 

Pumpkin was even faster than before, performing the race of her life, literally, while whimpering “Why do I only attract weirdoes!!!” (A.N: Actually, I can sympathize there)

 

------------------------------------------------

 

Ami sighed, in relief, when they finally reached their predetermined campsite, just out of the forest. Hopefully, tomorrow would prove to be better.

 

Michiru set the tents, while Ami and Donkey Pelt gathered wood for the fire. Makoto just went off, saying she would take care of the dinner. She came back a while later, looking troubled.

 

“What is it Makoto?”

 

“I'm not sure, I was fishing in a lake nearby, and all the while, I felt like I was being watched...”

 

“Your instinct doesn't fool you. We've been tailed all along...” With a curt nod of the head, she pointed at the complete darkness beyond the reddish pool of light provided by the campfire. There, two bright points of light were moving, coming closer and closer.

 

Michiru shot up, trembling of rage, or fear. “Is this...?”

 

“Yes.” Ami confirmed. She placed a calming hand on the ogress's forearm “I think she's followed us, ever since your fight. However, she hasn't made a move to attack us...”

 

“Well, duh... That's because she's afraid of us!”

 

“I doubt it. We've seen what she's capable of and how fast she moves. Donkey Pelt and myself wouldn't stand a chance in a fight with her. Together, Michiru and you could probably beat her, but in a one-to-one fight...”

 

“Wha...? You think I can't stand my ground against this fur ball?” Makoto asked

 

“Of course not! You're the strongest woman in this world and I trust you with my life!” Ami replied, snuggling up to the brown-haired woman and tracing small rounds on her chest.

 

Donkey Pelt leaned over Michiru, asking her from the corner of her mouth “Don't ya think these two are trying to hog the story?”

 

Michiru just nodded glumly, not really paying attention. Her mind was... elsewhere...

 

Seeing Michiru's obvious lack of interest, Donkey Pelt huffed in annoyance and addressed Ami. “So, what do you think she wants?”

 

Ami shrugged and looked meaningfully at Michiru. “Whether she's waiting for a better opportunity to attack us, but frankly, she had golden ones during the whole day, or ...”

 

“WHAT?”

 

“I would have been quite easy for her to ambush us in the forest, or eliminate us while we were gathering wood. She could have taken Makoto down while she was finding food. Michiru would have been alone against her. Considering her current state of mind, I don't think the issue would have been hard-pressed.” The blue-haired dwarf looked at Michiru meaningfully.

 

The ogress avoided her gaze, faintly blushing. `She's right. I... I don't want to fight Haruka. It's crazy! I barely know her... and yet...' Strong but gentle arms embracing her, warmth, security, tenderness...

 

“However, I highly doubt she plans to handle the matter like that. The logical course of action for her would probably be to subjugate and make you surrender to her and then, take you away...”

 

Michiru grabbed her own head and let out a soft plaintive moan `Why did Ami have to use such evocative words each time she talked about the giant cat? It was torture!' It startled her how eager she was to believe her and just give in the temptation. They would just have to run away together and live their forbidden love far from anyone... But could she really gamble with her life on Ami's assumptions, besides, what would become of Setsuna?

 

There was really only one way.

 

Wordlessly, Michiru got up and headed straight in the direction where the two feline orbs were gleaming, in the forest.

 

Donkey Pelt made a move to follow her, but Makoto yanked her back. “What the...! She needs our help! We can't let her face Haruka alone! The gods know what she will do to her!”

 

Makoto shook her head “I know it's dangerous, but it's something she needs to do by herself. We shouldn't intrude.”

 

“But what about the mission?”

 

“This is her decision to make. Don't worry. Should she decide to abandon the quest, Ami and I will still help you to fulfill it.”

 

Donkey Pelt nodded sadly while watching Michiru being swallowed by the shadows of the night.

 

 

A.N: Sorry it took me so long to update. I was, and to some extent, still am in a very bad case of writer block. I'll do my best to update more regularly, though...

Once again, thanks to all my reviewers, I'm glad I was able to entertain you ^^