Saiyuki Fan Fiction ❯ Mother Earth Is A Bitch ❯ Funny Looks ( Chapter 1 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
Title: Mother Earth is a Bitch
Author: Madyamisam
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters in Saiyuki, which makes me sad :(
Chapter: 1 – Funny looks.
Summary: The boys arrive at a quiet town at the foot of a mountain with a dark secret. Part of the Secrets of Sun collection. “V–]‰º’n ’n–]ã“V

---

The vast shadow of the mountain sheltered the small village beneath it as the sun coloured the sky in a rich orange glow in the west. It was peaceful and seemed untouched by the horrific realities of the world beyond it, so it was indeed an unusual event to encounter the four travellers riding silently in a green steel jeep.

Cho Hakkai glanced at his companions as he drove down the road and allowed a small and enigmatic smile grace his lips. On his left sat Sanzo staring at the road ahead with his hands hidden beneath the long sleeves of his white robe whilst his Maten scripture fluttered slightly in the wind. In the back of the car sat an increasingly aggravated Gojyo. He was silently contemplating on doodling a moustache on the face of the final member of their motley crew, who was fast asleep, to relieve his sense of boredom. Gojyo dug into his pockets for his usual Hi-Lite cigarettes and scowled at the empty packet. Tossing it away, Gojyo turned his attention back to Goku and readied his little prank on the monkey.

“Leave Goku alone Gojyo, we’ll be arriving in the next town soon.” Hakkai admonished.

“Man I’m so bored, where’s a good looking chick to chat up when you need one? It just makes me want to punch someone in the face right now” Gojyo moaned slouching at the back of the jeep and staring at the darkening sky as the last vestiges of the sun vanished into the horizon. He thought he might as well take a page out of Goku’s book but then the jeep rolled to a slow stop indicating a familiar situation the Sanzo Party always got into.

“Well you got your wish you irritating cockroach.” growled Sanzo for the first time as he started to load his Smith & Wesson handgun. Upon the reception of an impending fight, Gojyo grinned as the car came to a complete stop before a huge group of snarling demons.

Gojyo grinned as his shakujou materialised in his hand. “No need to get your robes up in a twist, your Un-holiness. I figured you’d need a little exercise since our last major fight.” As he said this, the blade disconnected from the staff and flew out in all directions, slicing through anything that was in the way. The dead youkai fell in clumps as Gojyo flicked his weapon allowing the chain and blade to recoil back into a staff.

Before long, the group of demons lay in piles around them. A slight breeze blew in the air and was only disturbed with the sound of light snoring as Goku was still fast asleep in the jeep.

“What the hell? He actually slept through that racket?” Gojyo groused. He rolled his slightly aching shoulder a few times after his much needed workout.

“I guess he’s just tired” Hakkai grinned as he made his way back into the driver’s seat of the vehicle.

“Lazy more like,” Gojyo retorted, making his shakujou disappear. He was about to walk over to kick the small brunet awake when the bushes rustled and a demon that had lain hidden decided to launch a sneak attack on the slumbering brunet.
“GOKU!” Sanzo shouted aiming to shoot cursing mentally when he failed to hear an explosion after he pulled the trigger of his emptied gun. The help wasn’t needed though. The three older travellers stared dumbfounded as the force of Goku’s punch sent the demon flying into the distance where the sun had set, a tiny glint in the sky being the last trace of his would be assassin. They slowly turned to their companion who had stood up, fists flailing as he ranted.

“THAT’S MY SHUMAI, KAPPA!!!” Goku’s eyes were still closed as he fought with Gojyo in his dreams.

“You’re shittin’ me…” Gojyo gasped.

“Ah ha, ha… Well we can be assured at least, that Goku knows how to take care of himself 24/7.” Hakkai chuckled as Goku dropped back onto floor of the jeep, mumbling incoherently.
“Don’t you find that even a little bit disturbing that he’s putting that much effort into beating me into a pulp in his dream?”

“Not really, it’s you after all,” Sanzo replied coolly as he slid back into his usual seat in the car ignoring the choice select of curses muttered under the red head’s breath. He cast a quick glance over to towards his young charge then he rolled his eyes allowing an amused smirk cross his lips as they set off towards the next town. It won’t be long before the monkey was going to wake up to the smell of food and be his loud, rambunctious self but Sanzo wasn’t going to let the kappa ruin that last peaceful hour, especially when the monkey was curled up like a dumpling reminding him of a time when his charge was younger.
The wind sighed as the mountain overlooking the valley silently watched the four travellers continue towards the village, leaving a bloodied pile of dismembered bodies in their wake. The trees appeared to quiver as if frightened from the horrific sight that marred the otherwise beautiful landscape. Just as the travellers drove far enough away from the massacred pile that they wouldn’t notice, a crack in the earth suddenly opened and water sprung out over the bodies washing away the blood whilst the grass grew and started to crawl, covering over them like a green carpet. Wisps of corrupt black energy drifted away as the bodies seemed to dissolve into the earth. Soon there was nothing left of the dead youkai except for a small grassy mound.

---

It was a place he felt he had been before yet he knew he had no memory of it. Goku felt the warm breeze and the soft green grass beneath his feet. There was a beautiful glassy waterfall and clusters of trees all holding large fruits of various kinds. A tinkling sound of wind chimes whispered upon the breeze and drew his attention to a woman. She was sat on a rock in the middle of the clearing, staring listlessly at the patch of flowers in front of her whilst running a small comb through her long locks of hair. The sound came from an ornate charm bracelet on her wrist that intertwined between her fingers connected by a delicate silver chain that sparkled under the dappled sunlight. Small round silver and gold coins shimmered as she moved her fingers whilst hanging from the wrist were two semi-circle pieces of bright, translucent emerald green jade with an intricate pattern of holes in them. A delicate hum filled the air as the comb slid down silken hair and Goku realised that the heavenly sounds were coming from the jades themselves.

“Um… hello?” Goku asked snapping the woman out of her reverie. “Sorry if I startled you. I think I’m lost.” The woman stared at the youth with an expression of complete disbelief. Now that things were looking even more awkward, Goku rubbed the back of his head and flashed a pained grin to hide his embarrassment.

“I was with some friends; there are three of them in a car. Have you seen them?” Snapping out of her stupor the woman shook her head in her answer. “Oh ok, sorry for bothering you.” He said hurriedly as he started to worry about being lost. Sanzo was not going to be pleased. The woman who had gotten over her shock walked slowly towards the youth who was busy muttering to himself.

“Oh man, where could those guys be? Last I remember I was still in the car and I’m starving.” As if on cue, a loud rumble burbled out from the pit of the golden eyed youth’s stomach. The woman smiled and reached up to pluck a piece of fruit from the nearest tree, offering it to the hungry brunet.

“For me?” the youth looked surprised and hopeful at the same time. The peach or at least what looked like it was huge, about roughly the size of a watermelon. The woman smiled and nodded pushing the huge fruit into his hands. Goku cheered like a child on Christmas as he devoured it with gusto. Peaches were one of his favourites. The woman simply watched contently until he finished it. “Yummy, that was the best peach I’ve ever had. Thank you so much!” Goku grinned happily at the kind woman and she seemed extremely pleased by his happiness. “Hey, sorry I never introduced myself. My name’s…” the youth suddenly got distracted by something.

A familiar sharp pain in the back of his head erupted and Goku quickly turned around expecting Sanzo to be standing there impatiently, arms crossed with his harisen sticking out. There was no one there. “Sanzo?” Goku called feeling extremely confused. Sanzo wasn’t there, neither were Hakkai or Gojyo. When he looked over to the kind woman he was taken aback that the kind smile had disappeared from the woman’s face replaced by a haunted look of loneliness.

“Goku…” the voice was barely a whisper but the youth faltered at the sound of his name being uttered by the woman’s lips.

“How did you…?”

----

“Goku! Wake up!”

He was on a soft and warm bed. Sunlight was peeking through the slit of a closed curtain and Goku groaned snuggling into the extra soft pillow wrapping the quilt over his head to block out the warm rays but it was not enough as a large pair of hands tore the quilt away making him shiver from the sudden draft.

“Come on you stupid monkey, you’ve slept more than enough already.” Gojyo’s grating voice was the last straw and Goku knew he was not going to be able to slip back into slumber. He rubbed his eyes and let out a wide yawn frowning at the wooliness that was in his mouth.


“I had dream of eating a giant peach.” He announced sleepily with a dopey grin on his face.

“Well good for you. I had the most awesome dinner and was for once stuffed because you weren’t there to eat it all.” Gojyo grinned leaning an arm against the bed post. Goku was suddenly quite confused and looked outside. How long had he slept?

“What time is it?” Hakkai flashed another of his enigmatic smiles. This was his extremely amused and mischievous smile.

“7 o’clock in the morning. We were actually starting to get worried and was considering getting a doctor to look at you last night when you wouldn’t wake up even to eat.”

“EH!? I missed dinner!” Goku’s face paled immediately when he realised what had happened. A loud painful rumble erupted from his abdomen as proof of missing out on one of his favourite past times.

“And it was delicious.” Gojyo smirked relishing the rare opportunity of tormenting the poor brunet about the massive feast the three elder members partook in the night before. Hakkai joined with a good natured chuckle. Sanzo sighed smacking the boy out of his stupor with the giant paper fan.

“Quit gawking and get yourself up, you stupid monkey, or else you won’t be eating breakfast either.” Goku squeaked, quickly changing his clothes and rushed out through a door only to smack himself painfully into the wall of the closet in his room. This resulted in having a very red nose and hearing the red headed half breed cackling like a hyena. Goku groaned realising his embarrassment was going to be a subject of ridicule that the others were going to be laughing about for months.

---

The huge breakfast more than made up the huge gnawing hunger sensation and Goku sighed contently despite of Gojyo’s half-hearted attempts at stealing food from his plate and his earlier humiliation all but forgotten, at least until someone brought it up again.  

“I hope the food is to your liking” said the innkeeper come waitress. Gojyo flashed his typical winning smile.

“It was as good as that exquisite dinner last night, Shihone-chan. The only problem is that this little monkey keeps eating it all.”  Shihone smiled, a slight pink flush appeared on her cheeks from the compliment.

“Hey can I have some more bread?” Goku called out eagerly pointing to an empty plate. The waitress seemed taken aback probably because the full plate of food that had just disappeared within minutes but was startled by the presence of the fourth member of the group of men that had checked in the night before. It was subtle but a strange look had passed over her face and it didn’t go unnoticed by the other three of the group.

“O-of course,” The girl hurried away and returned shortly with the fresh plate of bread. Gojyo started some idle chatter with the girl who seemed intent on watching the fluid motions Goku went through while guzzling down everything in sight.

“This seems like a pretty peaceful town, doesn’t it?” Hakkai commented looking outside. It was a clear day.

“I suppose in a way it is. I came here a couple of years ago for refuge after my home town got attacked by youkai.”

“So, this town itself has never attacked then?”

“No but…” Shihone caught herself mid-sentence as if contemplating whether she should say what she had in mind. Goku had paused in the middle of his eating at that point and looked up curiously. “Never mind. It looks like you need a refill of coffee there too. I’ll go get it now.” was all she said indicating Goku’s empty cup before she walked away leaving the group a bit confused. She had returned with a fresh pot and watched a little longer as the boy resumed eating. It was Hakkai who broke the awkward silence when he noticed Goku had polished off the last morsel of food on the table.

“Well when you are ready Goku we’re going to get some more supplies before we set off.” Goku nodded and leapt up from his seat. He waved cheerfully to Sanzo, who had sat himself in the small lounge room, too engrossed in his newspaper.

---

The town was bustling with activity, something that Goku hadn’t seen in a while but he was particularly wary at the moment. “People certainly seem relaxed considering what the world’s like at the moment” Gojyo’s seemingly casual comment was laced with suspicion. It was a given that the trio were uneasy particularly when the last time they had visited a town with a similar atmosphere turned out to be an ambush attack on them.

“Indeed, but hopefully we won’t hang around long enough for them to figure out we were here. I have to admit though, the produce here is extremely high standard. I’ve never seen pears that big before.” Hakkai added picking one up to examine it. Goku’s mouth started to water at the sight of the fruit stall laden with oversized apples and oranges and an image of the strange fruit forest flashed in his memory.

“Oh please can we get some Hakkai? Can we? Can we? Can we?” Goku almost bounced on his toes much to the amusement of the red head.

“Alright, they are an extremely good price for their quality. It would be a crime to pass up.” Hakkai replied cheerfully as he ordered a good dozen.

“Jeez, did you swallow a black hole at some point in your life, monkey? You only ate a few minutes ago.” The red head teased but Goku was too happy to argue. He also never noticed the strange looks from the vendors that followed him wherever he went. What did distract him though were the lines of shops past the market place. He noticed each one contained wooden toys and dolls packed to the brim on shelves. Each piece delicately crafted by hand. The only thing odd though was that all the shops were nearly empty. It was quite the contrast to the market place right next to them.

“Those are toy shops right? There ain’t any people in there.”

“I guess the kids would probably be flocking these streets as soon as they finish school.” Gojyo reasoned passing a bulging bag full of dried nuts that Hakkai had bartered over to the golden eyed youth. It was a good explanation for the lack of customers but as Goku stared at the line of shelves, he frowned at the amount of dust that was accumulated on the untouched goods. A sound of wind chimes and an image flashed across the reflection of the shop window. Goku suddenly felt dizzy and his vision seemed to blur.

“Goku? Are you alright?” Hakkai asked concerned. With a shake of a head, the dizzy spell was over as quickly as it came.

“Y-Yeah…” Goku said as he hurried after his two companions to continue their supply shopping.

---

The snarling, guttural sounds of the monsters were closing in on him but young as he was, he tried not to let the panicked haze override the results of his training. A clawed hand lashed out tearing at his clothes but ultimately, he managed to slip through the main horde of demons that had rushed out to kill him. He ducked as one lunged to catch his small legs, then leapt up high into a spinning hook kick across the face of another and landing perfectly before sprinting towards his destination. He wasn’t sure how long he ran but when he saw the entrance to the town, he chanced a moment to look behind him. The horde was merely a few yards away when another roar came from the bushes in front to pounce on him. He skidded down to his knees and rolled away but the crazed creature was quicker and had grabbed his ankle. With a gasp, he saw the glint of claws slashing down towards him. He knew he couldn’t possibly escape from this and the overwhelming fear finally caught up with him. This was going to be the end and he flinched closing his eyes to the attack.

He heard a loud crack and something sharp penetrating flesh and bone. Blood splattered across his body. However, he felt nothing. There was no stabbing pain and slowly he realised the hot blood that was covering his clothes was not his own. The child looked up and felt a sickening nausea at the sight of the impaled youkai. A large tree had burst through the earth and stopped the creature in its tracks. More cracks and more trees sprung out from the ground, stabbing, grabbing and crushing their victims and before he realised it, the horde was dead.

Shaking, he watched as vines slithered like snakes, wrapping themselves around the corpses before dragging them deep into the loosened soil. One particular vine gently pried the steel like grip of the dead youkai that had grabbed the boy’s ankle loose before he too disappeared, leaving nothing but a patch of dirt in its wake. A whimper escaped the boy’s lips, tears flowed from his eyes and he fell on his back in exhaustion. Breathing heavily, he noticed a figure from the corner of his eye and the sound of wind chimes filled the air. The boy lay there and closed his eyes allowing the musical sound wash over him like a soothing and hypnotic wave. When he was ready to continue his journey, the boy pushed himself up on to his hands and knees and crawled towards the town. Someone was calling him and the sound of the wind chimes will lead the way.

---

Sam: Welcome to my new story of my current obsession with the Saiyuki franchise.

Sanzo: Weren’t you writing Yu-Gi-Oh fanfics a while back? What the hell are you doing here?

Sam: O____O Um… well…

--------FLASHBACK------

Police Officer: Madyamisam, you are under arrest for charges of kidnapping, torture and Yu-Gi-Oh character trafficking.  

Sam: YOU’LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!!! *crashes through a window*

Jou: T___T Is she gone?

Seto: Let’s hope so…

----Several years later…----

Jou: Lalala…. Starting a new life. Lalala… OUCH! *pulls out a dart from his neck* What the- X___X

Sam: Teeheee… ^____^ *drags Jou’s body towards a large and deep pit with a wooden sign next to it. The sign is labelled “On Hiatus” written crudely in blood.* I’ll play with you later…

------END FLASHBACK-----

Sam: So basically, I will get back to the Yu-Gi-Oh boys at some point hopefully once I’ve gotten a couple of Saiyuki stories out. ^___^

Saiyuki boys: O_____O

Sam: Anyway, Chapter 2 is actually already partly written and I hope to have it out soon but enjoy this for now. Oh, and if you are actually starting to wonder what in tarnation is this Secrets of Sun collection malarkey then… wait and see. At least until I get out a few more stories.

Gojyo: In the meantime, feel free to piss on her efforts, tell her what a load of crap she’s just written and that you want your minutes reading it back.

Sam: T_____T