Saiyuki Fan Fiction ❯ Permission ❯ Part One ( Chapter 1 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Hakkai reveals his true feelings for Sanzo, then makes Sanzo an offer Sanzo decides he doesn't want to refuse.

Saiyuki and all its characters belong to Kazuya Minekura. No copyright infringement intended.

Anime/Manga: Saiyuki Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Action / Adventure / Psychological / Romance | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 08.26.2007 | Updated On: 08.26.2007 | Pages: 9 | Words: 10.2K | Visits: 504 | Status: Completed

PART ONE

Sanzo lay stretched out on the cool sand of the quiet beach, up far enough to stay out of reach of the little wavelets that washed up against the lakeshore. Gojyo and Goku had gone off to see if there was any kind of food stand anywhere nearby. Sanzo lay there enjoying the protection and warmth his silk robes gave him. It was late afternoon, in the off season, and no one else was around to trouble him with their stares and problems and requests for preaching. A long, slow sigh of contentment eased out of him. He felt the echo of it brush against his cheek. Knowing it had to be Hakkai, and dreading the possible reasons for it, Sanzo opened his eyes.

Hakkai hovered above him, leaning on one elbow. For once the mask of smiling cheerfulness was gone. The green-eyed youkai stared down at Sanzo with a look of sorrow. Beneath that, Sanzo sensed a deep, unspoken longing.

"What the hell are you doing?" Sanzo asked.

"Waiting for you to open your eyes."

"Why?"

"So I can drown myself in their depths." A brief smile flitted across Hakkai's lips. The warmth in his voice increased. "That would be a happy death."

"Hakkai—" Sanzo pulled his elbows under himself. He had to get up, to get away.

"Sanzo, please." Hakkai laid his free hand on Sanzo's shoulder. The touch was light enough, but the weight of his hand and his forearm lying across Sanzo's chest pinned him there more effectively than the heaviest chains. "There's something I've been wanting to say to you. This is an opportune moment. Who knows when we may have another."

Sanzo stared up into Hakkai's deep emerald eyes, trying to read the thoughts that lay behind them. Part of him enjoyed the added warmth of Hakkai's touch. That only made his heart beat even harder. "Fine. Get on with it."

His harsh tone didn't fool Hakkai. Very little about Sanzo ever did, the talent Hakkai had that most aggravated Sanzo. Hakkai stared for a long moment into the amethyst depths of Sanzo's eyes, then let his head slowly drop until it rested in the hollow between Sanzo's neck and shoulder. His hand tightened on Sanzo's other shoulder.

"Sanzo," Hakkai whispered. "I love you."

Sanzo clenched his eyes shut. He would have been much happier if Hakkai had said something less dangerous, less frightening. Something like wanting to strip Sanzo naked, dip him in honey, roll him in sesame seeds, then have him for dessert. The sound of Hakkai's voice pulled Sanzo back from that fantasy. Sanzo mentally slapped himself then focussed on what Hakkai was saying.

"...don't want anything from you, Sanzo. I won't make any demands, or resort to those displays of affection you find so distasteful. There is just one thing I'll ask for, and then I'll say nothing more."

The heat of Hakkai's body pressed against his side was making it all the more difficult for Sanzo to keep his voice steady. "And what would that be?"

"All I want is your permission. Just give me your permission to love you, to cherish this feeling in my heart knowing that you know I feel it, and it's all right with you."

Sanzo pondered that. How very Hakkai. He was an expert at suffering in silence, at carrying both a grudge and a torch for a very long time. Sanzo knew he could rely on Hakkai to keep his word.

"Of course," Hakkai went on, "should there ever come a time when there might be something you want to give me, I would be more than delighted to receive it. But please understand, I'm not going to hold out expectations."

Sanzo bit his lip, fighting off a snort of cynical laughter. Again, this was just like Hakkai. He was saying he wouldn't come on to Sanzo, wouldn't let Sanzo know how much he wanted Sanzo or even if he was just feeling horny. Not like that perverted kappa. However, if Sanzo might be in the mood and felt like doing something about it, Hakkai would be more than happy to play along. Hakkai had now placed all control over the situation in Sanzo's hands. That was the way Sanzo liked it, as he was sure Hakkai well knew. Thus reassured, Sanzo relaxed, angling his body just enough to accept a little more of Hakkai's weight. He buried his nose in the dark silk of Hakkai's hair, inhaling its scent. Deep forests, rich earth, the clean green scent of herbs.

"All right," Sanzo said. "I accept those terms. You have my permission."

Now it was Hakkai's turn to relax against him. When Hakkai spoke, his voice was weak with relief. "Thank you, Sanzo." He rubbed his cheek against Sanzo's shoulder. "Thank you so much."

Hakkai's hand slid down from Sanzo's other shoulder to his waist, moving up between his shoulderblades. He curled his fingers into the ivory silk covering Sanzo's back. Sanzo's heart thudded harder. Instinct made him want to panic and shove Hakkai away. Something even deeper than instinct reached out for what Hakkai was offering, the warmth of his body and the comfort of his closeness and the sudden surge of desire that roused another kind of heat within Sanzo.

Sanzo sank his fingers into Hakkai's hair, combing through the silky chocolate strands, something he'd longed to do on those dark nights when the sound of the rain lashed his lonely soul. They lay there, listening to the rhythm of the waves, sharing each other's warmth in this new, so much closer way. Many thoughts came and went through Sanzo's mind before he decided to exercise a little of his new-found power. He tightened his grip on Hakkai's hair and eased his head up until they were eye to eye again.

"Kiss me, before those idiots come back."

Hakkai held back a moment, staring down at Sanzo with those eyes so green, deeper that a still, deep pond.... Moving slowly, bit by bit, Hakkai lowered his head until his lips touched Sanzo's. Full soft lips, warm and moist and welcoming.... Sanzo lifted his chin, pressing his mouth more firmly against Hakkai's. Hakkai sighed. His breath entered Sanzo's mouth like the gift of Hakkai's essence. Deeper warmth flared inside Sanzo. With an agile twist, he rolled them over, pinning Hakkai beneath him and thrusting his tongue between those soft lips. Hakkai groaned, both hands rising to clasp Sanzo's head as he buried his fingers in all that silky golden hair. Sanzo stroked Hakkai's tongue with his own. Hakkai responded by capturing Sanzo's tongue, sucking on it with such relentless erotic power that Sanzo finally had to jerk his head back and turn away.

"Enough! Enough!" He rested his forehead against Hakkai's shoulder, panting. "We have to stop. I can hear Goku yelling about something."

Sanzo raised his head to look down at Hakkai. The dark-haired man's face was flushed, his breathing ragged, his eyes just now regaining focus.

"As you wish, Sanzo," he whispered. "You know I'm your slave."

Again desire surged through Sanzo. He bent his head to bite the sensitive skin just behind Hakkai's ear. Hakkai's breath caught. His back arched, his hips flexing upward with a sudden sharp thrust. Sanzo made a mental note to remember that reaction when he had Hakkai naked and ready beneath him.

"You'd better get us to the next town fast." Sanzo ran the tip of his tongue along the curve of Hakkai's ear before giving the lobe a sharp nip. "My temper gets even worse when I'm frustrated."

"Tenkai forbid," Hakkai murmured, a twinkle in his good eye.

"Smart ass." Sanzo got up, shook the sand off his robes, then held out his hand to Hakkai. Hakkai stared at it for a long moment, then gripped it between his own as Sanzo hauled him up onto his feet.

"What?" Sanzo asked. "Why the surprise?"

"You've never offered me your hand before," Hakkai said. He smiled, a real smile, shy and sweet. "Sometimes I forget just how strong you really are."

Sanzo fired up a cigarette and dragged the welcome smoke deep into his lungs. "Is that your roundabout way of asking me to be gentle with you?"

Hakkai's eyes opened wide. A faint blush colored his cheeks. Sanzo smirked, strolling off down the shore even as Gojyo and Goku appeared at the top of the stairs leading down to the sand, shouting and holding up bento boxes.

***

Another night, another inn. Hakkai folded back the bedclothes and plumped his pillow. He'd showered and brushed his teeth then put on his plain blue cotton pajamas. His dirty clothes were put aside for washing, and tomorrow's choices for clean clothes lay neatly folded and waiting on the wooden chair beside the room's small table. On the table sat a jug of sake and two ups. Hakkai hoped Sanzo wouldn't feel the need to drink himself into a stupor in order to get some sleep. He placed his monocle atop the pile of clothing, then looked over at Hakuryu where he snuggled down in his own nest of blankets just inside the closet away from draughts.

"Goodnight, Hakuryu."

"Kyuuuu...." The little dragon opened one eye, then curled deeper into his blankets.

Hakkai sat down on his bed, swung his legs up and under the covers, then paused, listening to the sounds of Sanzo moving around in their little bathroom. Hakkai didn't know what to do. Should he just go to bed? Should he wait for some sign, some signal of whatever might be on Sanzo's mind? He didn't want to look too expectant, but on the other hand, he didn't want to look unwilling. It was so hard to know what to do in response to the signals Sanzo did or did not send.

Sanzo came out of the bathroom trailing a cloud of steam. It was a cold evening, making a hot shower a treasured luxury. Hakkai watched the droplets of water fall from Sanzo's damp hair. They gathered on his shoulders, then ran down his bare chest in little rivulets, following the lines of solid muscle. Sanzo wore his jeans, slung low on his hips as usual. Hakkai wanted to reach out and pull Sanzo close enough so Hakkai could lick up all those stray droplets. Or perhaps just catch him by one pocket then pull the jeans down the rest of the way.

Sanzo went on rubbing at his hair with a towel. He walked over to the window and looked out at the darkness, at the lowering clouds and the shifting wind. Hakkai now had a good view of Sanzo's back, all the ribs and muscles and the delightful sweep of Sanzo's moon pale skin. Sanzo turned from the window and pulled the towel from around his shoulders. He dropped it over the back of the wooden chair, then stalked over to his bed and threw himself down on it, lacing his fingers together behind his head. He stared at the ceiling. Hakkai watched him, sensing the restless energy burning just below the surface of Sanzo's skin. What thoughts drove the heretical priest now? What unhappy memories were stirring, making Sanzo shift and twitch and reach for a peace he couldn't grasp?

"Is your back bothering you, Sanzo?" Hakkai asked. As soft as his voice was, it seemed loud in the stillness.

Sanzo's head turned toward Hakkai. Those enthralling amethyst eyes focussed on him. As always, looking Sanzo straight in the face left Hakkai a little breathless. The man was just so beautiful. His restlessness kept him moving a little, making the muscles of his bare arms flex, creating ripples in the sculptured lines of his chest and belly. Hakkai was almost sure Sanzo had no idea what a sinuous display he was putting on.

"It's my neck," Sanzo finally replied.

"Sit up then," Hakkai said. "Let me warm up my hands, then I'll see what I can do."

As the party's healer, Hakkai was granted leave to touch Sanzo much more than Gojyo or Goku. Examinations, checkups, therapeutic massage.... Clean, clinical terms for the contact of Hakkai's hands on Sanzo's body, terms that made it clear these were not moments of physical intimacy. As Hakkai worked his fingers and rolled his wrists, he smiled at the nonsense of that thinking. Yes, boundaries were important, but so was the physical contact and simple human warmth that Sanzo so desperately needed. Hakkai knew the priest would rather die than admit any such need, any such weakness.

Sanzo sat up on the edge of his bed. Hakkai looked around, trying to decide the best way to place himself so he could get the leverage he needed to really work out the tension in Sanzo's muscles.

"Perhaps the chair would be better," he said, moving his pile of clothing to the far side of his own bed.

"'Ch." Sanzo got up, plucked the towel off the back of the chair and threw it on the foot of his bed, then sat down, arms crossed over his chest.

With a small sigh Hakkai picked up the towel, carried it into the bathroom and hung it up to dry. When he stepped out of the bathroom, he became aware of Sanzo's attention focussed on him with an intensity that was somewhat disturbing. Sanzo's lips were set in a thin line. His eyes were narrowed. His posture was almost rigid. Hakkai wondered at the cause of such seeming hostility. He moved around behind Sanzo, alert for any indication in Sanzo's chi of what might be prompting Sanzo to be so defensive in his body language. Satisfied that his hands were warm, Hakkai laid them on Sanzo's shoulders.

"Try to relax," Hakkai said softly. "The more tension you can let go of, the easier it will be for me to work out the rest."

"Just get on with it."

Trailing his fingertips over the pale skin, Hakkai mapped out the worst knots in Sanzo's muscles. He closed his eyes and pictured the knots, kinks in the smooth flow of Sanzo's chi. Hakkai smoothed the stiff muscles, trying to ease the flow along and make the knots untie themselves. He worked his way up from between Sanzo's shoulderblades along his neck and up into his hair. Oh, that hair. Every strand pure gold, messy and silky and pure heaven to touch.

"Mmm." Sanzo sighed, rolling his head on his neck. "How do your hands stay so soft? You work as hard as Gojyo or Goku, and you hang on to that steering wheel all day."

Hakkai shrugged, his heart pounding with sudden joy. Praise from Sanzo was a rare gift. "It's probably the massage oil." Hakkai's hands might be soft, but another part of him was getting hard. "Would you like me to use some on your back? That might help you sleep better."

Sanzo straightened, sitting quite still. There was a peculiar ripple in his chi. Hakkai didn't know what it meant, but it was surely some kind of clue to Sanzo's sudden change of mood.

"Sanzo?"

"Yes." Sanzo stood up, turned, and looked Hakkai right in the eye. "Yes. Get the oil." With that he stretched out on his bed, lying on his belly and resting his head on the pillow with his arms folded underneath.

Hakkai contemplated Sanzo for a long moment. The priest lay there, naked to the waist, the worn denim of his jeans molded to the muscles of his thighs and ass. In another moment Hakkai would straddle those thighs and begin to work the oil into the muscles girding Sanzo's shoulderblades, spine, and ribs. He'd lean forward, putting his weight behind the motions of his hands. That would make his pelvis tilt forward, bringing his hips up against Sanzo's. A perfectly natural position. If Sanzo enjoyed the massage, as Hakkai was determined to see that he did, his body would respond by arching. The rib cage had nowhere to go, being pressed into the mattress, so the resulting leverage would make Sanzo's hips lift. Bringing them up against Hakkai's hips, against his erection that showed no signs of diminishing.

"Hakkai?"

"Yes, Sanzo. Here it is." Hakkai fetched the bottle of massage oil from his bag. He opened it and poured some onto his left palm, then set the bottle aside on the little table that stood between the beds. He pressed his palms together, concentrating on warming the oil. "White Lotus." Something about the name, or perhaps the image of the flower, had become linked in his mind with Sanzo so strongly no other oil seemed appropriate now. A sudden temptation gripped him, to pour a thick line of oil down Sanzo's spine and work it into his muscles until he lay there gleaming in the light of the oil lamps. Then Sanzo would turn over, and Hakkai might have the pleasure of repeating the process, oiling Sanzo's shoulders and chest and belly and....

"Hakkai? What the hell are you doing?"

"Just warming the oil, Sanzo. You may recall that time you ordered me to make absolutely certain the oil was warm enough before I touch you."

"Hn." Sanzo moved his head on the pillow, settling back down with a sigh.

Hakkai took his place across Sanzo's thighs, then leaned forward and laid his hands on Sanzo's shoulders just at the points where the muscles on each side met his neck. He worked the oil into the muscles, his fingers gliding along Sanzo's skin, following the contour of tendons all too close to the surface. Lean and strong and ruthless.... Hakkai closed his eyes and let the rhythm of his hands take over. In his mind he whispered the words he longed to chant in counterpoint to the motions of his hands. I love you.... I love you.... I love you....

Sanzo grunted and shifted beneath Hakkai, his ass rising and sliding under Hakkai's hips in a way that made Hakkai bite his tongue, silencing any sound that might betray his desire.

By the time Hakkai reached the small of Sanzo's back, Sanzo's breathing had slowed and deepened. It would be a disappointment if the massage put Sanzo to sleep, but that would bring its own lesser kind of satisfaction. Sanzo had so much trouble getting to sleep and staying asleep that Hakkai would be well enough pleased to help that along. He smoothed both hands down Sanzo's back in one long last sweep from shoulders to hips, then lifted his hands away. He swung his leg over, easing off the mattress so he wouldn't disturb Sanzo.

"Where are you going?" Sanzo turned over onto his back, reaching up to tug the pillow into a better position under his head.

Hakkai paused, still kneeling on the bed. "I thought you'd fallen asleep."

"Not yet." Sanzo lay there, looking up at Hakkai, then glancing away. When he spoke, his voice was oddly soft. "Do the front too?"

"Of course." Hakkai resumed his position sitting across Sanzo's thighs. He poured a generous amount of the oil down the midline of Sanzo's torso, between his pectoral muscles and the hard planes of his washboard belly. "Is there any place in particular that needs attention?"

Again Sanzo held Hakkai's gaze for a moment, then looked away. A faint blush tinted his cheeks. "You know. Just the usual aches and pains."

Hakkai nodded. He touched the fingertips of both hands to the oil and swept it up and out across Sanzo's pectorals to his shoulders. Sanzo tensed slightly, then a long, silent breath escaped him. Hakkai kept his eyes on his hands, watching for the spot that had made Sanzo flinch like that. His hands glided back down, brushing across the hard nubs of Sanzo's nipples. Sanzo's breath caught. Sudden understanding brought a rush of heat sweeping over Hakkai. He leaned forward, reaching for Sanzo's trapezius muscles. Long practice kept his face carefully blank despite the burning awareness of his arousal pressed hard against the front of Sanzo's hips. Sanzo grasped the front of his pajama shirt and pulled him down until they were almost nose to nose.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Sanzo asked, his voice both hoarse and breathy.

"Just trying to help you relax." Hakkai willed his body to remain absolutely still in Sanzo's grip. Sanzo had pulled him down so close, close enough to leave no doubt in anyone's mind about the state of Hakkai's arousal. Much to Hakkai's secret delight, there was a corresponding bulge in the front of Sanzo's jeans.

"'Relax'?" Sanzo snorted. "Then why do you keep touching my--" His blush darkened. "My nip—nipples? You might as well just pour oil right on them."

Hakkai smiled, a true smile that pulled up one corner of his mouth and brought light to his eyes. "Is that a request?"

"Suppose it was. What would you say to that?"

Sanzo was being combative as ever, but Hakkai sensed the need he was trying to mask with this show of hostility. Sanzo was no good at asking for attention, care, loving contact. As difficult as it was for Hakkai to voice his own needs, he would have to do the work for both of them. Heart pounding, he took a deep breath, then spoke.

"I'd say I'd be more than happy to pour oil all over any part of your body that pleases you." Hakkai moved his hips in a slow, gentle circle and lowered his voice to a husky whisper. "Just tell me what you want."

Sanzo clenched his eyes shut. His hips moved, answering Hakkai's pressure with his own. "I want...." He licked his lips. The sight of that wet tongue slicking those soft lips made Hakkai's blood burn with yearning.

"Tell me," Hakkai murmured. He dipped his fingertips into the oil, then touched the tip of each forefinger to Sanzo's nipples, drawing slow circles around the hard little nubs.

Sanzo's breath hissed out between his teeth. "Hakkai...." Those exquisite amethyst eyes opened. "More."

Hakkai rolled Sanzo's nipples between his fingers. Sanzo groaned, his eyelids fluttering closed even as his hips lifted again, rocking beneath Hakkai's. Sanzo let go of the front of Hakkai's shirt and freed the buttons, then pushed the blue cotton cloth off of Hakkai's shoulders. Hakkai let the shirt slide down his arms then tossed it over onto his bed. He held the snap of Sanzo's jeans between finger and thumb. Another twinge in Sanzo's chi warned Hakkai of Sanzo's rising anxiety. Hakkai laid his free hand on Sanzo's belly, moving it in slow, gentle circles, hoping to reassure Sanzo with the warmth and the caress.

"Please, Sanzo-sama," Hakkai murmured. "Will you let me finish undressing you?"

Confirmation that all control still lay in Sanzo's hands made Sanzo settle back under Hakkai's touch. Sanzo gave one shaky nod of his head, then flung his forearm across his eyes. Hakkai unsnapped Sanzo's jeans and eased the zipper down, both startled and pleased to discover Sanzo wore nothing under his jeans. As Hakkai gently freed the hard length contained within the snug denim, he couldn't help but congratulate himself on discovering some of his other daydreams about Sanzo were accurate. Fair skin flushed a deep rose, velvety over the iron hard column of Sanzo's cock, the faint blue tracery of veins, and the nest of curls so dark a gold they seemed more like bronze....

"Hakkai?" Sanzo's voice, shaky, anxious.

"You are so lovely, Sanzo. Every single inch of you. Perfection itself."

"Don't bullshit me, Hakkai. You've seen my scars."

Hakkai eased the jeans down off Sanzo's slim, muscular legs and tossed them aside near the foot of the bed. He stood for a moment to remove his pajama pants, then lay down next to Sanzo, chest to chest and thigh against thigh. The sensation of bare skin warm and smooth against bare skin left both men moaning. Hakkai lay there, staring down into those fathomless purple eyes, gently moving the inside of his thigh against the heat of Sanzo's cock.

"You've been through the fire, Sanzo. Time and time again. It has burned the impurities out of you, leaving you strong and clean and golden."

Sanzo let his arm fall by his side, revealing amethyst eyes wide with both wonder and wariness. He scowled. "I'm just a man."

"Well then." Hakkai poured more oil across Sanzo's belly. He trailed his fingertips through it, moving down along Sanzo's hipbone to his thigh. "If you don't like my way with words, perhaps I should just let my hands speak for me."

His oil-slick fingers curled around Sanzo's cock, sliding up from base to tip and back down again. Sanzo groaned, hips bucking against Hakkai's warm, slippery grasp. He reached up with both hands to seize Hakkai's shoulders and pull him down for a long, hot kiss. Their tongues met and mingled, Hakkai's teasing and tasting, Sanzo's almost frantic with need. When Sanzo finally broke away, he was panting.

"You say you love me."

"Yes, Sanzo." Hakkai kissed Sanzo's collarbone, following the line of it with the tip of his tongue. "I love you."

Sanzo moaned, head back, eyes closed. "Show me."

Hakkai smiled, a real smile full of tenderness. He moved closer, leaning over Sanzo, pressing their bodies together. Sanzo could seem so cold, so remote, but at that moment he was burning, his skin hot and his eyes blazing like flawless matched amethysts set in the ivory perfection of his face. Hakkai placed a light kiss on Sanzo's temple, on his cheekbone, then on his sweet, kiss-bruised lips.

"Sanzo-sama, my love, my lord...." Another kiss, just beneath the point of Sanzo's jaw. "What more could I ask for, than permission to make love to you...."

Sanzo stared up at Hakkai, cheeks flushed, chest heaving with the effort of drawing breath. Hakkai slid one knee between Sanzo's, urging his thighs apart. Sanzo drew his knees up, granting Hakkai room to settle his own slim figure down against Sanzo's lean form. Their erections brushed against each other, satiny skin meeting satiny skin. Hakkai poured more oil onto his palm then grasped both erections, moving his hand up and down in a lazy pumping motion.

"Hakkai!" Sanzo cried. "Oh fuck.... Oh, that feels so good...."

Hakkai gathered Sanzo into his arms and kissed him, his tongue gliding along the full curve of Sanzo's lower lip before plunging inside to capture Sanzo's tongue and suck it into his own mouth. Sanzo's arms closed around Hakkai, one hand buried in his dark hair, the other clasping one firm buttock as he ground his hips against Hakkai's in a silent plea for more. Now Hakkai groaned, tilting his head to continue his delicious assault on Sanzo's mouth.

Sanzo wound his legs around Hakkai's, seeking the pressure and rhythm that would end his heavenly torment. Hakkai broke the kiss to sit back on his knees and plant both hands on Sanzo's hips, holding him still.

"What are you waiting for?" Sanzo cried. "Take me, dammit! I'm dying here!"

"Sanzo." Hakkai laid his hand against Sanzo's flushed cheek. "This isn't about just getting off so you can sleep."

"Whatever! Just--"

"You said show me. I will show you, Sanzo, but love takes time. Give me that time. I promise you'll be glad you did."

With a hiss of frustration Sanzo fell back against the pillows.

Hakkai pressed light kisses up and down the rigid column of Sanzo's cock. He marveled at the softness of the skin that surrounded the hardness within. Each kiss drew a sigh, a breath, a moan from Sanzo. Hakkai swept his tongue in one long lick from base to tip, making Sanzo's back arch and that lovely face contort in ecstatic torment. Savoring the passionate fury burning him up from within, Hakkai kept licking Sanzo's length up and down until it was slippery enough to slide in and out of his mouth with the slightest bobbing motion of his head.

"Bastard," Sanzo growled. "You're torturing me and you love it."

"Should I stop?"

"Stop now and I'll kill you."

Hakkai chuckled, letting the vibration of his laughter move through his lips to Sanzo's cock. Sanzo sucked in a sharp breath. Those beautiful amethyst eyes fluttered closed. Hakkai kept humming, kept working Sanzo's cock in and out of his mouth, now and then letting just the very edge of his teeth scrape lightly along the more sensitive spots.

Sanzo let out an agonized groan, his head thrashing back and forth on the pillow.

"Oh gods. I can't stand it!" He reached down to bury his fingers in Hakkai's thick dark hair. "Finish me, you evil prick. Finish me!"

To hear Sanzo himself begging for more.... The sound of that harsh, hoarse voice went straight to Hakkai's cock, making it throb, aching for its own release. An almost steady stream of precum left Hakkai's thighs streaked with the proof of his maddening desire. Hakkai slicked his middle finger with more oil, then gently pressed it against the ring of muscle that would allow him access to the hot, tight depths of Sanzo's body.

Sanzo's thighs opened even farther. "Yes.... Yes...."

Hakkai rested his head on Sanzo's belly, keeping Sanzo's cock in his mouth while he eased that finger deeper inside. His free hand circled his own cock, gripping it loosely while he slicked it with more of the oil. The sensation was pure heaven, making him moan against Sanzo's cock. Sanzo's hips bucked, making Sanzo impale himself farther on Hakkai's long slim finger. Hakkai turned his wrist, searching, stroking--

Sanzo let out a harsh cry, flinging out his free arm and gripping the sheets so hard Hakkai expected to hear the sound of fabric tearing. He smiled to himself, teasing the head of Sanzo's cock, thrusting the tip of his tongue into the slit over and over again while he rubbed Sanzo's sweet spot. Sanzo's fingers in his hair tightened to a painful degree. Hakkai welcomed it, welcomed the pressure that showed him the rhythm Sanzo craved. He rose up to take more of Sanzo's cock into his mouth, clasping it around the base to stroke it while he sucked on the shaft and eased a second finger into Sanzo.

Sanzo groaned, grasping Hakkai's shoulder, his nails biting into Hakkai's skin. His hips worked madly. Sweat gleamed on his skin. Hakkai watched the lean muscles writhe beneath the pale skin as the fury of the oncoming orgasm gathered within Sanzo's body.

All at once Sanzo stiffened. His eyes opened wide. Out of his mouth came a long, low moan, shaped into one word. "Hakkai...."

Sanzo's cock throbbed in Hakkai's grasp as the first hot gush poured across his tongue. Sanzo's muscles clamped down around Hakkai's fingers, prompting an answering groan from Hakkai. The sound of his name on Sanzo's lips had nearly pushed him over the edge. Once he did take Sanzo, he wouldn't last very long, but every second would be pure rapture.

Sanzo's hips jerked. One more hard jet of come struck the roof of Hakkai's mouth. He swallowed it all, sucking hard for the last few drops. Hakkai gave Sanzo's cock one last kiss, then wiped his mouth on the back of his hand. He moved to kneel between Sanzo's open thighs. Sanzo reached one shaking hand to curl those exquisite fingers around Hakkai's length. Hakkai shuddered, hips thrusting against Sanzo's grip.

"Mmmmmm." Sanzo licked his lips. "Give it to me, Green Eyes." Sanzo's fingers glided down to cup Hakkai's balls. "All of it."

Sanzo lay back against the pillow. As much as Hakkai was dying to bury himself inside Sanzo, he lingered a moment, looking down at the naked, gleaming figure. Sanzo lying there offering himself, begging to be taken, to be fucked hard.

"I love you."

The words hung in the air between them, spoken so softly Hakkai touched his lips, not really sure if he'd said them aloud.

Sanzo's look of sexy, sultry need changed. Those captivating purple eyes widened. The smirk faded, his lips parting, chin lifting as if asking for a kiss. Suddenly Hakkai could see the boy Sanzo must have been, young Kouryuu, back in the days before tragedy wrecked his world and crippled his heart. Hakkai felt the burn of tears behind his eyes. Sanzo had never looked more beautiful to him. With a rush of love and tenderness flooding his small, shriveled heart like water poured across parched sands, Hakkai settled himself against Sanzo and kissed him, a sweet gentle kiss meant to soothe Sanzo's natural defensiveness even as Hakkai pressed the head of his cock against Sanzo's entrance.

"Deep breath," Hakkai murmured.

For once, Sanzo obeyed.

"Let it out. Let it all go."

Sanzo released his breath in a long sigh that flowed over Hakkai's shoulder with pleasing warmth. Hakkai slid his hands up under Sanzo's shoulders, seeking the best leverage, and brought his hips forward. As he sank into Sanzo, Sanzo's eyes clenched shut, his fingers tightening on Hakkai's biceps.

"Easy," Hakkai murmured, nuzzling Sanzo's throat. "I am your healer, Sanzo-sama. The one who makes you feel better."

Sanzo's grip eased. Hakkai sank in deeper, moaning against Sanzo's skin.

"Every dream I've had of you is nothing to this moment...."

"You...dream...about me?"

"All the time."

"How—how long?"

Hakkai smiled, lifting his head to look down into Sanzo's wondering eyes. "I can't remember a time when I didn't love you. Even when you stood there glaring down at me, ready to shoot me then and there. Even so, you were my savior, come to deliver me from the agony of my life."

Sanzo buried his face against Hakkai's shoulder and brought his legs up to circle Hakkai's narrow waist. That left Hakkai sliding farther into Sanzo, at an angle that made both of them groan aloud. Hakkai rocked against Sanzo, his muscles straining against the self-control that was rapidly giving way before the wild desire to do exactly as Sanzo asked and give him all of it, fast and hard and deep. Hakkai pulled back a bit more than halfway, then sank in again. And again. And again. Sanzo held him tight, murmuring against his neck. Hakkai shifted his weight, seeking to brace himself better, and Sanzo cried out, throwing his head back. Hakkai thrust again, striking the same spot.

"More!" Sanzo was panting now, one hand on his dripping cock. "Come on, Hakkai. Fuck me! Fuck me!"

Never had Sanzo given him an order he obeyed with greater delight. Hakkai put his back into it, pounding Sanzo into the mattress, making him groan and thrash and sink his teeth into Hakkai's shoulder. Hakkai wrapped his arms around Sanzo, pressing their bodies together. The sweat running down both their chests and the silvery pearls leaking from the head of Sanzo's newly hardened cock left both their bellies slick enough to make his cock slide easily between them, giving Sanzo the friction he needed without Hakkai lending a hand.

"Ready, Sanzo?"

"Yes! Oh gods, I'm so close...."

Hakkai closed his eyes and buried his face against the sweat dampened golden silk of Sanzo's hair. He quickened his pace, thrusting hard, his aim perfect. Sanzo's back arched as he let out a howl. Hakkai tightened his grip, keeping their bodies molded together around Sanzo's throbbing cock. Sanzo's hands slid down Hakkai's slick back to grab hold of his ass and try to pull him in even deeper. Hakkai let out a shout just as Sanzo's mouth mashed against his. Their cries of fulfillment mingled as Sanzo's come burst hot and thick over Hakkai's chest and the pulsations of Sanzo's climax sucked Hakkai's cock dry.

They lay there gasping in a sweaty, sticky tangle until Sanzo turned his head to press a kiss to Hakkai's temple.

"Let me up. I need a smoke."

"Oh, Sanzo." Hakkai couldn't keep all of the disapproval out of his voice.

"Love me the way I am, Hakkai." Sanzo gave him a playful slap on the ass. "Now let me up before I get out my harisen."

"I knew you had a kinky streak." Hakkai moved to the side.

Sanzo fumbled in the sleeve of his robes for his cigarettes and lighter. He lit up, took a long drag, then blew a string of perfect smoke rings. "Me?" He poured himself a drink from the bottle of sake on the table, then brought another full cup to Hakkai who accepted it with a fond smile. "I have a very strong suspicion about that smile of yours. While you're driving all day, the gods only know what kind of bizarre fantasies you create to amuse yourself."

Hakkai blushed. "Why Sanzo, you don't really think--"

"Spare me." Sanzo drank his sake, then gave Hakkai a rare smile. "You don't want to disappoint me, now do you, Hakkai?"

Hakkai returned Sanzo's smile with something even more rare, a burst of his own laughter.

***