Saiyuki Reload Fan Fiction / Saiyuki Reload Gunlock Fan Fiction / Gensomaden Saiyuki Fan Fiction ❯ Do It Again ❯ SON GOKU ( Chapter 1 )

Title: 'Do It Again'

Author: Chrissy Sky and Amatorculus

Fandom: Saiyuki

Rating: R

Warnings: yaoi, reincarnation!

Pairing(s): 93, 58, for the moment

Disclaimer: Saiyuki doesn't belong to us, alas we are confined to fic for the moment.

Word count: 3919

CHAPTER ONE: SON GOKU

It's warm now. It was cold this morning. It's always cold in the mornings. It never used to be like this. But it's okay. It's been a long time since I've felt really warm. On the inside, y'know?

The last time they said he died from 'natural causes'. He tried to hide it when he was sick. He'd yell at me when I was concerned. Every day, I felt his strength fade, and all I could do was watch. The end came sooner than I thought. It always does, sort of sneaks up on me. I've been here, alone, since then.

But my stomach never growled once, not 'til this morning. Woke up cold and hungry. I wonder if I can do it again or not. But I've never abandoned them before. I really don't know what else I'd do, if I didn't find them. And some food.

The air always tells me what's for lunch, so I take a good long sniff. The scent I get isn't food, though it's something almost as important. Before I could smell it on myself too, on my clothes, but it's not coming from me now. It's distant...

Sanzo.

That makes up my mind, smelling what can only be his scent in the air. I don't care what happens. I have to see him again. He's alive. I'll find him.

But before I get the chance my stomach roars a mighty battle cry that makes my knees go kind of weak... I swear I can hear all the vaguely edible small creatures running away. I look down at the grass and groan. This's gonna be hard work.

I leave the spot I'd lived in for, probably, years and begin walking. I want to stop and complain about the hunger pains, but there's no one to complain to, so I just keep going. Eventually I find the end of the forest and the road. Which is kind of disappointing. I kick at the rocks and dust and wonder how far away the real road is. I stop and squint at the horizon a bit...I think I can just about make it out...

It's as good a direction as any, so I head toward it. As I'm walking, to get my mind off how hungry I am, I wonder about Sanzo. What he'll be like this time. It's his same soul. His behaviour is always the same. It's just his face and name are sometimes different. He never remembers me. Neither do Hakkai or Gojyo, if I can find them too. So I have to explain every time. I'm not real good at explaining either. I've done it a few times now, so it shouldn't be so hard. But somehow, when I get there and I see them...I never seem to say it right. But I can worry about that later, when I've found 'em. I wonder what colour Gojyo's hair'll be.

Sanzo's always blond. Always has those droopy eyes. It's kind of funny, but comforting too. He can be different in a lot of little ways, but essentially he's the same Sanzo. Gojyo, I dunno why, usually looks a lot different. Except his smile -- he always smiles the same. Especially when he calls me a monkey. Stupid pervert. Hakkai is more like Sanzo, he'll look and act the same, and be a great cook -- there goes my stomach again.

Thankfully I'm coming up to the road now. And there's another problem -- it's long. I have no idea how far the nearest town is but I'm sure I don't wanna find out by walking all the way there. What I need...is a lift. I sit down on the grass. I wonder if people visit this forest often. I guess you could bring a dog here or something. I always wanted a dog, but Sanzo's never keen. He says one dirty animal is more than enough.

I hear the car approach before I see it. I stand to wait for it. A good way to tell how humans have advanced over time is looking at their cars. From the look of this one, I can tell I've been in that forest for a long time. Can't waste more time. I step out in front of the car. 'Cause otherwise he might not stop. Sure enough, it works like a charm and he hits the breaks hard. Still, the car's moving fast and getting a bit too close for comfort, so I jump back at the last minute.

The driver looks surprised, then angry. He shouts something, but I can't hear. Not waiting for an invitation, I walk around to the passenger side and knock on the window. When it's rolled down I ask, "Can I get a ride?" He looks at me funny then. The anger disappears and there's something else. He wrinkles his nose. I don't understand what's wrong. I really need a ride, can't he see that? I don't get people sometimes, the way they act. He goes to wind the window up but I grab onto it and hold it still. Don't ignore me! He yells at me again, pretending like he's still angry. But he's shaking now, he's scared. Hurts, that. I'm something to be scared of still. I guess some things never change.

"Wait for somebody else!" he yells.

"I'm in a hurry!" I say. "Just take me to the nearest city." I need to go now. He hesitates a moment longer but then fear gets the better of him. I sense it flare up right before he opens the door.

"First city we come to, you're out, okay?" I smile, grateful.

"Deal!" I say as I climb into the car, closing the door behind me. As he drives down the road, I can't help but look at all the interesting buttons on the dashboard. I wonder about the other differences, the ones in the world rather than in people. They don't usually matter all that much to me. After the first couple of times, I guess I stopped paying attention to stuff like that. Sanzo, Hakkai and Gojyo were what mattered to me, 'cause they mattered all the time.

One thing I do know is that people normally don't drive this fast. Unless it's Sanzo. This guy is scared, I can smell the fear coming off him in waves. The hands that grip the steering wheel are tight, the knuckles white. And he keeps looking at me, like he expects me to turn into a dragon all of a sudden or something. His eyes dart from the road to me and back again, and again. And when I stare back at him he just stares real hard at the road again, though even then he just keeps on twitching like he needs to turn his head again.

Sighing, I just turn my back to him, looking out the passenger window at the trees and phone-polls breezing by. I'm not used to a car ride being this quiet. By now, Gojyo and I would've gotten into a fight. Sanzo would get mad and threaten to kill us. Hakkai would laugh quietly and make a joke. I've missed that, but especially right now. But with the speed this guy's driving, I won't have to put up with it for much longer. I never learned to drive myself, but I'm sure it's not right to go this speed. Not gonna complain today though, 'cause I'm in a hurry. When the city appears on the horizon, I have something else to stare at. It's big.

It's even bigger up close. I start to tip my head back to try and see the sky but the car-door slamming behind me catches my attention again. He's in such a hurry to drive off, I think he must've dropped his keys or something, 'cause he's scrambling around madly in the car and he doesn't seem to be going anywhere. I stand and watch until finally he gets the car going again and speeds off with a screech of tires.

What a weird guy.

I begin to sniff the air and the driver is soon pushed far from my mind. I did mean to continue searching for Sanzo's scent, but something else now takes over as my main priority... Besides, if there's any hope of finding him, I need food. Now. Right now. And with so much to choose from, it shouldn't be a problem. There are restaurants everywhere! Hell, they sell it on the streets in carts! But now I can't choose which smell to chase. I run towards the market and take a look around. I know there's meat here somewhere...and it's close. It's a very distinctive smell, I know this smell...ostrich! No sooner do I smell it, than I crave it. I'm so hungry! Eagerly I reach for my prize...

...and realise I have no money.

Damn it! Well, that isn't a big deal, really. It's not like I haven't stolen before. I scan the area quickly to make sure I'm not being watched, then grab a hot dog off a nearby stall, quickly running off, stuffing the food into my mouth. I savour every bit of it as it slides over my tongue. I'm still hungry but that took the edge off so...what was I doing? Oh yeah, looking for Sanzo. I need to pick up the scent again. I take a good sniff but all I smell is more tempting food... I sigh and turn away from the market. I gotta focus. Sanzo, Sanzo...I smelt him before, he's gotta be here somewhere... The scent should be stronger, I should be closer, but... This way! No, wait. I'm not sure...

I'm not looking where I'm going, so it's only natural that I bump into someone. I mumble an apology and try to move around the person when they lay a hand on my shoulder. Instinct kicks in and I prepare to fight, but then I hear a familiar voice say, "You..."

I look at the person more closely, and he gives me a funny look in return. He's a tall man, and though his clothes are different, I remember his face. It's that guy...

"Kougaiji?" Was he reincarnated or... Well, I don't remember him dying. I sure as hell didn't kill him. I guess he just went on living, like me. That's kinda cool. I grin up at him and he gives me an even funnier look. I'm happy to see him. Really. I'd hug him if I didn't think my arse'd get burned.

"Goku. What are you...?"

"Looking for Sanzo."

"Sanzo? Goku, he's dead, he-"

"Not that one, the new one."

"The...new one?" He gives me a long confused look. I guess it is confusing, but I manage. Dunno if I'd be any better at explaining it to him than I am at explaining it to the others though.

"Yeah. He comes back. They all do. Y'know, reincarnation?" He blinks and nods slowly.

"So you've..."

"Done this before. Yeah."

"I see." He gives me another of those weird looks and wrinkles his nose. "You might want to clean up before you see him though."

"Huh?" He frowns at me then shakes his head. I let it pass. "Where have you been?" And why haven't I seen him before now?

"I...it's complicated."

"A long story?" This time he glares a little.

"Yeah," he says carefully.

"I haven't got time then. I've gotta find Sanzo." I smile and wave as I turn and rush off. I caught the scent just now, it was definitely stronger than before. He's close.

"Hey, Goku-" I hear Kougaiji calling after me but I can't stop now. It's getting darker and I quicken my pace. I want to find Sanzo before dark. He's close, so I know I can. The closer I get, the faster I go, my excitement building. I'll see him soon, I keep thinking, keep reassuring myself. Soon. I notice the people stare at me as I walk through the glass doors. A woman sitting behind a desk asks me if I need help, but I tell her no and continue on my way. Two guys in blue uniforms start to walk over and, my instincts going off, I begin running, following the scent. I find the stairs and begin climbing. Every so often I have to stop and sniff at the doors of each floor to make sure I haven't lost him. But I don't and I keep climbing. The guards are too slow, I lost them a few floors down, but I continue to hurry.

I quickly lose count of how many floors up I've traveled. It'd be funny if he turned out to be on the very top floor, I think, funny in a really cruddy way. I know he's here somewhere, I can smell him, and the smell is so familiar. But he's not on this floor, so I hurry up to the next one. But he's not there either. I'm gonna go crazy before I even reach the top! Maybe this one, I-

This is it. I'm sure.

I rush through the door, frightening the people inside here too. I ignore them, running around desks and people carrying papers and pushing carts. The scent leads me to the door on the other side of the room and I push it open. I stop and stare at the blond man inside.

It's him.

Yeay! I rush in and open my mouth to call out to him. But then suddenly my foot lands on something not so still, and it moves, and my foot moves with it. I reach out for the edge of the desk to try and stop myself falling, but all I manage to get a hold of is some papers. They come down with me, to meet a none-too-soft carpet. I groan on the floor and lift myself up, hesitantly meeting the droopy-eyed glare fixed on me. As first impressions go, this wasn't my best. He's giving me the oddest looks to go along with the anger and, even though I know he couldn't possibly remember, it kind of hurts.

Is he really Sanzo? I begin to wonder... He looks different. They all look different, of course, but... I've never made a mistake before. That doesn't mean that I never will though. I have to know for sure. So, when his mouth opens -- to no doubt shout something, he looks like he's going to shout -- I jump onto the desk and press my mouth on his. He makes a startled noise but doesn't pull away.

Instead, he hits me over the head with a stapler.

"Ow!" I yelp and fall off the desk, landing hard again on the floor. When I look up, Sanzo's standing over me. He looks really pissed.

"You stupid dirty little monkey! How dare you!"

I grin widely. Yup, it's definitely Sanzo. Without a doubt. His cheeks redden when he sees my expression and he glares pure death down at me. I look around at our surroundings, realising I have no idea where to go from here. People were listening in at the door, and I didn't like audiences. Probably should continue this later. Besides, I realise now as I spot my reflection in some glass, I do look pretty dirty.

Then something else catches my eye. It's a photo, hanging on the wall behind Sanzo. The two men in it...they look awfully familiar. It always happens this way, somehow the three of them are close, even before I get there. There's always some kind of connection. That's how I can find all three of them each time, 'cause once I find one, I know the others can't be far away. I just hope I'm right again this time.

"Those two," I point at the picture and Sanzo sees what I mean, "bring them and meet me at the park 'round the corner, at midnight." Sanzo looks from me to the picture and back again in silent astonishment. He has to believe me! I can't think what else to do! I caught sight of the park on my way in and midnight's a time I won't forget easy. C'mon Sanzo, please, give me a chance. It seems like it takes Sanzo forever to answer, but just when he opens his mouth again, the security guys finally catch up with me. Crap! "Bye!" I wave to Sanzo, jump over the guys, and race out.

---

I've cleaned myself up as best as I could, and stolen some more food, 'cause my stomach insisted. I know I'm a little late as I walk through the park. It's a big park so I have to search for them. I hear their voices before I see them though. I recognise Hakkai's gentle yet firm voice easier than I thought I would.

"It's only five minutes past midnight..."

"Che. This is just a waste of time," says Gojyo.

"What harm would it do to wait a little longer?" Hakkai reasons.

"This was your idea -- you two can stay here all night," Gojyo snaps. "I'm going home."

"Five more minutes." Sanzo! I start to run. "Then we'll have given him ten minutes. Which is plenty."

"I suppose..." Hakkai muses.

"I'm here!" I yell to them as I reach the spot where they're waiting. Five minutes isn't that bad, considering the stuff I had to sort wasn't easy to do.

"That him?" Gojyo gives Sanzo a funny look.

"Yes." Sanzo still sounds pissed. Not good. Damn, I really hope he just listens to me this time. I'm tired now and still hungry. I want a decent meal, at least one today, and a warm bed.

"Good evening." Hakkai smiles warmly at me. Thank goodness, Hakkai'll surely be on my side!

"Hi." I grin gratefully at him.

"I think we should start with your name..." Hakkai continues, giving me an encouraging look. My name. Didn't I say it before? No, no I didn't. Damn.

"Goku. I'm Goku." I smile again, hoping it's reassuring. Hakkai continues to smile back.

"I'm Tobias. This is Jay," he points at Gojyo, "and you met Sage earlier." This last name obviously refers to Sanzo, I realise. Gojyo snorts.

"Now all we need is some tea!"

"Jay..."

"What did you want?" Sanzo asks me directly, interrupting whatever Gojyo's reply was gonna be. I sigh and begin.

"Well, see, it's complicated... I used to know you. All of you. Before. You've been reborn lots of times, so I always have to find you...and explain all this again." I cringe, waiting for their reactions.

"Uh huh," Gojyo says, "and what about you?"

"I just go on living."

"That," Hakkai says slowly, eyes wide, "must be very hard on you, Goku."

"Are you buying this?!" Gojyo scoffs. I kinda expected him to be skeptical.

"Yes, but what do you want?" Sanzo snaps impatiently.

"I..." I start, "I..." I hang my head. I don't know. I just... "I want it back the way it was. Like before."

"Before?" he asks. I swallow, I feel really nervous now.

"You-you were..." All that I lived for. Someone I would've gladly died for. But I never did, you were always the one who died. I just want you to be again, so that I can be.

"I was what?" he prompts me. I continue to flounder, not knowing how to answer.

"Would you like to stay with Sage, Goku?" Hakkai asks me, giving me that same understanding smile. Sanzo glares at him. Gojyo doesn't look too happy either. But it <i>is</i> what I want. It would be like before, when I was with Sanzo.

"Yes..." I look to Sanzo now, hoping against hope. "Please! I promise I'll be quiet!"

Sanzo turns his glare back on me. "Somehow I doubt that..."

"Okay, time out!" Gojyo interrupts. "What the hell are you doing, Toby?"

"Making a decision," Hakkai says calmly. "I'm curious, I'd like to see where this is going. But it's late and we're all tired, so a quick decision needs to be made."

"But why should Sage take in some stranger? If you're curious, why don't you take him?"

"It would be too risky for him to stay with either you or I. Someone's bound to notice and start asking questions. He'll be safe with Sage and he doesn't have to worry about expenses, because I'll cover them. It's not as if I can't afford it."

"You two don't live together?" I ask, confused. Hakkai chokes. Gojyo splutters.

"Why the fuck would we live together?!" At his question, Hakkai's face turns a little red.

"Goku," Hakkai says slowly, "did Jay and I...live together, before?"

"Always," I respond, not seeing the problem.

"Che! A-ny-way...Sage? Are you gonna go along with this?" Sanzo sighs boredly.

"If Tobias says so. He's the boss." Hakkai smiles.

"I knew you would see it my way." I think Gojyo's sulking now. He looks really...ruffled. He should know better than to argue with Hakkai though. Hakkai pats his shoulder and whispers something I can't hear, but it makes Gojyo blush slightly. "Now that that's settled," Hakkai says louder, still keeping his hand on Gojyo's shoulder, "I think it's best to continue this in the morning."

"Finally!" Sanzo sighs again. "C'mon then, monkey-boy."

"I'm not a monkey!" I yell back, but I run after him anyway. Turns out Sanzo only lives a little ways from here. I guess he must've walked to the park to meet me 'cause it only takes us a few minutes to walk back to his place. As soon as we're inside, I smell food.

"You er hungry?" Sanzo asks, sounding sleepy and disinterested. Maybe he heard my stomach growling.

"Yes!" I do my very best to look endearing. He heaves another long sigh, opens a cupboard and pulls something out.

"Catch!" he says. I do and shove the thing straight in my mouth. I find meat inside and I'm happy.

He watches me eat then says, "There's only one bedroom..."

I nod. That's not a problem. He rolls his eyes at me.

"There's only one bed!"

I blink, nod. Okay. No, wait! Oh.

He starts to walk away. I hesitate. What should I do? He turns and glares back at me. "Hey! Don't just stand there. You want to sleep in the bath?"

I hurry after him, following him into the bedroom. Once there I begin taking off my clothes, since I know they smell. When I notice him watching me I blush. "What?"

"Nothing," he answers, and begins doing the same. I finish and watch him. His little movements of simply undressing, and even walking, talking -- it's Sanzo. His body, which I'm seeing more and more of now, isn't even that different. I smile again and climb onto the bed, just watching him. I don't think I'm going to be able to stop watching him for a while. He finishes and turns to look at me, then stares. Given a front view now, I grin wider. He's still the sun to me, more beautiful than anything.

"What?" I ask again.

"...you smell."

I blush again. "I know."

Sanzo sighs. "Never mind. You can use the shower in the morning." He turns off the lamp and climbs into bed beside me. I wait a moment, then move closer. He's so warm. After a moment, Sanzo asks, "In the park, what you wouldn't say... We were lovers, weren't we?"

"...yeah."

And he kisses me.

TBC.