Saiyuki Reload Fan Fiction ❯ You Were Meant To Be Mine ❯ Conflicting Needs ( Chapter 6 )

 

CHAPTER SIX Conflicting Needs

 

Gojyo sat on a fallen tree trunk off to one side of the clearing by himself, smoking and tearing apart weed after weed. He couldn't stand the sound of the monkey boy's chatter and Layla's replies, salted now and then with some snotty remark from Sanzo. With only an two or three hours of sunlight left, they'd made camp for the night. Gojyo couldn't escape any farther without being completely obvious, so he sat there with his back turned, smoking and fretting.

 

The cautious crunch of boots on twigs and dry leaves told him Hakkai had finally decided to come check on him.

 

"You all right?" Hakkai asked.

 

Several smart ass replies crossed Gojyo's mind, but since it was Hakkai asking, he settled for the sullen truth.

 

"She doesn't like me."

 

"Of course she does. She smiles at you more than anyone else."

 

"Just because she's polite and grateful for my help, that doesn't mean she likes me."

 

"Since when do you care how much a woman actually likes you?"

 

Gojyo felt his heart drop even lower. That was the kind of stone cold cut Gojyo expected from Sanzo, not from gentle, green-eyed Hakkai.

 

"Fine. Forget it." Gojyo sucked down the last of the smoke in his current cigarette, blew it out into the wind which meant it blew back into his face and Hakkai's, then dropped the butt and ground it out beneath his bootheel with more force than it really needed. "I'll get over it. Shouldn't take me any time at all to do that, right? Seeing how I'm such an insensitive bastard."

 

"Gojyo."

 

Hakkai's gentle chiding tone made Gojyo wish he could lay his head in Hakkai's lap. Hakkai's long, tapering fingers would comb through his own crimson hair, smoothing the tangles there just as they could somehow ease the tangles in his mind and heart.

 

"There's a big difference between Layla not liking you at all and Layla just not being ready to sleep with you."

 

Gojyo snorted, but said nothing.

 

"Think about it," Hakkai said. "Her party is attacked by bandits. Her family gets slaughtered before her eyes. Then she's held captive by those same murderers before being sold into slavery. And then some tall stranger with flaming red hair and eyes to match wins her in a card game like she's a cow or a sack of grain."

 

"I never--"

 

"Hush." Hakkai reached behind Gojyo to wind his fingers into the crimson hair covering the back of Gojyo's neck and knead the stiff tendons there. "So he takes her back to his inn, where she's no doubt fully expecting to have to pay for his protection with her body. Instead, she comes face to face with this legendary holy man."

 

"Sanzo is a taste of hell, that's for damn sure."

 

"Some days," Hakkai agreed. "So you see, Layla has had no chance to recover from any of this. She hasn't got the strength or the energy for something as risky as a new love affair."

 

Gojyo scowled. "Man, if you ever decide to put yourself back on the market, the chicks will brand you Mr. Sensitive and then you'll be fighting them off with a stick."

 

Hakkai looked away, his cheeks turning the shade of dusky pink that signaled a mixture of pleasure and embarrassment. "Well, thanks. But I don't think so."

 

They sat together in silence punctuated now and then by Sanzo's fan whacking Goku, Goku's yelps, and Layla's laughter.

 

"Hear that?" Hakkai asked. "She's laughing. Most victims of such terrible events couldn't do that for weeks, maybe even years. Be happy for her, Gojyo. With us she's found a safe place to rest. Three big brothers and one little brother who can escort her to the next town. There she can try to get by until she's strong enough to either go back to whatever family she has left, or build a new life around a new one."

 

"I don't want to be her 'big brother.'"

 

"Oh, stop pouting." The sudden harshness in Hakkai's tone made Gojyo look at him in surprise. Hakkai glared at him, his lips compressed into a thin, bitter line. "The gods gave you the gift of saving Layla. Wishing you could use her like you use most of your women is pathetic. Worse, it's totally selfish!"

 

Gojyo stared at Hakkai. He couldn't have been more shocked if Hakkai had slapped him across the face. Gojyo wasn't the sharpest knife in the kitchen, but he was close enough to Hakkai to realize something had hurt Hakkai, something he himself had done. And then it hit him. The night before they'd arrived at the town where Gojyo had won Layla, Hakkai allowed Gojyo to stay with him all night, to spend hours and hours torturing each other with pleasures learned by their many years of living together, and then to sleep curled up together until sunrise.

 

And here Gojyo was mooning over some girl he'd only just met, one he'd leave behind after their next stop.

 

"Oh, 'Kai, I'm sorry." He held out his hand to Hakkai, palm down.

 

"What's that for?" Hakkai said, still upset.

 

"You can slap it or hold it or grab it and drag me off into the tent, whatever you want."

 

Hakkai sighed. "Well, at least this time I didn't have to hit you over the head to make you see I was upset about something."

 

Gojyo hung his head. "I'm sorry. I'm such an asshole. I shouldn't even look at anything in a skirt, not when I've got you."

 

Hakkai leaned on him. "Do you really mean that?" His voice was so quiet Gojyo almost didn't hear him.

 

Gojyo slung an arm around his shoulders. "Hell yes. You have all the virtues of a woman and only one or two of the habits that make women such hell to live with."

 

"I'd like a detailed list, please. Of both."

 

"Let's see. Virtues: you're a great cook, you take good care of me when I get hurt or sick, you know how to read my mind and tell how I'm really feeling, you like to clean, and last but never least," Gojyo turned his head so his lips brushed Hakkai's ear, "you've got that kinky streak that makes me hard as an iron bar just thinking about it."

 

Hakkai tilted his head up just enough so their lips met. "Now what about those bad habits?"

 

Gojyo grinned against Hakkai's lips. "Sorry, what were we talking about?"

 

Hakkai smiled back, planting a quick kiss on Gojyo's neck before he straightened up. "Now why don't you tell me what's really bothering you?"

 

Gojyo groaned. "OK, fine." He lit another cigarette and sorted out his thoughts. "What I just don't get is how Layla could like that pissy monk so much."

 

"Are you sure she does? Religious awe and a firm sense of duty aren't the same as the affection of true friendship."

 

Gojyo burst out laughing. "Are you writing this stuff down? If that isn't a quote from one of those books you're always reading, it should be!" He gave Hakkai a playful poke in the ribs. "But yeah, I am sure. I know every signal a woman gives off when she's hot for a particular guy." He jerked his thumb over his shoulder. "She's gone through the whole list of what a virgin's body can do."

 

Hakkai gave him a solemn bow. "On that point I can only yield to your far greater weight of experience."

 

"Damn right!"

 

"Amazing." Hakkai looked back at Layla, who stood between Sanzo and Goku, gripping Sanzo's wrist in both hands to keep his fan away from Goku where he hunkered down against her hip. "Look at that. Sanzo's letting her touch him."

 

Gojyo spun around so fast he nearly fell off the tree trunk. "I don't fucking believe it. Mr. I-Hate-Women has finally found somebody he can stand."

 

Hakkai and Gojyo turned to look at each other.

 

"You don't think--" Hakkai began.

 

"He wouldn't really--" Gojyo said.

 

They both shook their heads.

 

"No way," Gojyo said. "No fucking way, and I mean that literally. His Holiness might like to act like he's afraid of nothing, but I'll bet you every inch I've got that if it ever came down to it, he'd be the world's most terrified virgin."

 

Hakkai put his head to one side, clearly pondering the question. "It's never a good idea to underestimate Sanzo."

 

Gojyo looked from Hakkai to Sanzo and back again. "Hey! Hey! Get your kinky mind off that monk!"

 

Hakkai pouted at him. "You never let me have any fun."

 

"If it's fun you want...." Gojyo tackled Hakkai, dragging him down off the far side of the tree trunk, out of sight of the other three across the clearing.

 

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