Saiyuki Reload Fan Fiction ❯ You Were Meant To Be Mine ❯ Shared Hope ( Chapter 18 )

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN Shared Hope

 

Layla hugged her pillow, staring up at the water stains on the whitewashed ceiling. She lay on her bed in her room, listening to all the little noises that told her the inn and the people inside it were ready to begin a new day. She'd been up for a while already, long enough to bathe and dress and tidy her hair. Today she wore the green dress. It seemed fitting to end the journey wearing the dress in which she began it. It was clean, thanks to Hakkai seeing to it the laundry got done. Sanzo had awakened her just as the sun was lightening the horizon. They'd stayed curled up together under the warm blankets, sharing soft kisses, until Sanzo told her he needed to go out before the others woke up and demanded breakfast. So Layla had slipped away to her own room, where she washed away the last of the cake frosting and all other evidence of Sanzo's passion.

 

Sanzo. A smile curved Layla's lips. Koryuu. That was his name, the name that she would always remember him by. The name that had burst from her lips again and again as together they shared the taste of heavenly bliss. She'd fought so hard to protect herself and her virtue against the filthy lust of the bandits. If this was her reward, the joy of giving her virginity to Koryuu, then perhaps she could learn to live with the guilt of killing.

 

Down the hall she heard a door slam, then Goku's voice. The deeper growl of Gojyo's voice answered him. Moments later there came a knock on her own door. Layla opened it to see Hakkai standing there.

 

"Good morning," he said. "We were wondering if you might know where Sanzo is."

 

"Sanzo told me he needed to go out before breakfast. I thought he'd be back before the rest of you woke up."

 

"Hm." Hakkai glanced past her at her traveling bag where it sat on her bed. "All packed?"

 

"Yes."

 

"Good. Let me give you a hand with that. We should check and see if Sanzo is downstairs."

 

Hakkai stepped past her and picked up the bag. Layla followed him toward the stairway, closing the door behind them. A few doors down Goku bounced up and down on one of the beds while Gojyo sat on the other, holding his head in both hands. Their bags were also packed, sitting in the middle of the room.

 

"Come on, you two," Hakkai said. "We're going to look for Sanzo downstairs."

 

"Gojyo?" Layla asked. "Are you all right?"

 

Gojyo raised his head to give her a look of irritation mixed with raw suffering. His crimson eyes were so bloodshot the whites were almost the same color as the irises. "I have a hangover. Make that the mother of all hangovers."

 

"Stupid kappa!" Goku said. "You never learn, do you?"

 

Goku bounced past Gojyo on his way to follow Hakkai. Gojyo reached out one long arm, caught Goku by the collar, and slammed him face first into the floor, wincing at the noise. Gojyo stood up to step over him and grab his own traveling bag. He draped his arm around Layla's shoulders, guiding her toward the stairway.

 

"How are you this morning?" Gojyo asked.

 

Layla bit her lip. "I'm fine, Gojyo. I'm just fine."

 

"Really?" He took her by the shoulders and looked into her eyes. "Do you mean it?"

 

Nodding, Layla smiled, letting him see the true happiness shining inside her. Gojyo sighed, then kissed her forehead.

 

"Good. That means I don't have to kill that prick after all."

 

"Gojyo!"

 

Downstairs they found Sanzo sitting at a table with the innkeeper himself waiting to take their breakfast orders. It was easy to see why. Sanzo sat there in his full regalia, complete with golden crown and ivory silk veil. His reading glasses had slid down to the end of his nose while he studied the newspaper he held.

 

"Morning, Sanzo!" Goku dropped his bag on the floor and kicked it under a chair, then sat down beside Sanzo.

 

Hakkai took the chair on Sanzo's other side. "Good morning, Sanzo."

 

"Greetings, Almighty Sanzo-sama." Gojyo sat across from Sanzo and lit a cigarette. "What's with the fancy dress?"

 

"Shut up and order," Sanzo snapped. "I want to get going as soon as the shops are open."

 

Layla hung back, not sure how to interpret what she was seeing. Sanzo looked up from his newspaper.

 

"Good morning, Layla. Will you be joining us, or do you intend to go eat in the kitchen?"

 

Layla had no idea what to say. The return of Sanzo's aloof disdain now, after the night they'd shared, left her more confused than ever. As always, Gojyo came to her rescue.

 

"You really are a total bastard, Sanzo." Gojyo stood up and fetched another chair from a nearby table. "Come sit by me, Layla."

 

Layla felt a moment's dizziness. The whole situation was so similar to the first time she'd met Sanzo. Gojyo came to her and put his arm around her shoulders, steering her over to her chair. He sat down beside her and shot Sanzo a look of frosty disgust.

 

"Acting like last night never happened," he muttered. "Simply fucking amazing."

 

Layla gasped. Sanzo reached into his sleeve, pulled out his paper fan, and delivered three lightning fast whacks across the back of Gojyo's aching head.

 

"Shut up, cockroach. Don't presume to know what I'm thinking, especially when you're hardly equipped to do any of that yourself."

 

Over the low rumble of Gojyo's pained cursing, they all gave their breakfast orders. When the food arrived, Layla could only pick at her eggs and toast. Was Gojyo right? Was Sanzo starting to regret what they'd done? Perhaps that was why he'd taken refuge in wearing all of his priestly regalia. Koryuu was gone, Sanzo was back, and it was time to face the hard truth of reality.

 

When everyone had finished eating, Sanzo stood up.

 

"Get Jeep loaded while I settle our bill."

 

Layla watched him walk away, feeling her heart sink.

 

***

 

Jeep pulled up in front of a tidy-looking shop with clean windows and a well-swept front walk. Flowers bloomed in the window boxes. Neat rows of smooth river stones bordered the walkway leading to the shop's front. Such details spoke of an orderly mind that had an appreciation of beauty. Sanzo found that reassuring. Master Henshaw would be a reasonable man with a wife who looked after the appearance of things. The last and most important question would be, did they have kind hearts? Layla was still too fragile to bear life's struggles without some kind of genuine caring and support.

 

"Hakkai," Sanzo said. "You make the introductions. Give Master Henshaw my greetings."

 

Hakkai climbed out of the driver's seat and held up both hands to Layla. She stood and bent to lay her hands on his shoulders. Gripping her around the waist, Hakkai lifted her out of Jeep and set her on her feet. Sanzo strode around to the driver's side of Jeep, tugging at his veil and touching his crown to make sure it sat straight atop his head. He shot a glare at Gojyo and Goku, who were already starting to elbow each other and work themselves into another wrangle.

 

"You two shut up and keep still."

 

"Hai hai, Almighty Sanzo-sama," Gojyo drawled. "Tenkai forbid we do anything to tarnish the shine on that crown."

 

"Keep it up, cockroach," Sanzo snapped. "Soon you won't have Layla to hide behind anymore."

 

Much to Sanzo's satisfaction, that shut the kappa up. Sanzo turned away from Gojyo's stricken look in time to see the unhappiness on Layla's face. The morning's rush had given Sanzo no opportunity to reassure Layla, especially after Gojyo and his big mouth had planted even more anxiety in her mind. There was nothing to be done about it right then. At Sanzo's nod, Hakkai took Layla's hand and pulled it through the crook of his arm, then led her up the walkway to the shop's front door. He rapped lightly on the door, which opened almost immediately. There stood a plain, plump woman in her middle fifties, dressed in dark blue with an apron of saffron yellow embroidered with black and red patterns.

 

"Madame Henshaw?" Hakkai said.

 

"Yes?"

 

"I'm Cho Hakkai. I spoke to your husband yesterday." Hakkai turned to Layla. "This is the lady who will be working for you."

 

Layla smiled. "How do you do, Madame Henshaw? My name is Layla Trevalle."

 

"Oh yes!" Madame Henshaw's face lit up with a bright smile. "Do come in, my dear. Such a time you've had! You must be weary from your traveling."

 

"Please, Madame Henshaw," Layla said. "There is someone who wishes to speak to you on my behalf."

 

Layla took one step to the side. With a straight line of sight to the golden glory that was Genjo Sanzo, Madame Henshaw gasped, one hand flying to her mouth.

 

"Sanzo-sama...." Madame Henshaw called back over her shoulder. "Danny! Go fetch your master! And bring all the others in the workshop!"

 

Madame Henshaw bustled out, coming down the walkway to bow before Sanzo. Moments later a husky man in rolled shirtsleeves and faded green trousers came rushing out the door. Bits of thread and scraps of fabric clung to his hands and clothing. He was a burly bear of a man, going bald on top but with a luxuriant beard to compensate. More young men and women crowded out of the shop behind Master Henshaw. Everyone stared at Sanzo. A few turned curious glances on Layla, studying her before looking back at Sanzo again.

 

"Sanzo-sama." Master Henshaw bowed. "Forgive us for this hasty welcome. We had no idea you'd be coming today."

 

Sanzo gave him a nod that looked slow and gracious less from any pretense on Sanzo's part than a pure effort to keep the damn crown from slipping.

 

"Do come in, Sanzo-sama." Master Henshaw swept one beefy arm toward the open doorway. "Master Cho said nothing about the young lady bringing someone of such importance with her."

 

"You're most kind, Master Henshaw," Sanzo said. "I'm sorry to disturb you while you're working."

 

"Not at all, Sanzo-sama! This is a great honor!"

 

"If you please, Sanzo-sama," said Madame Henshaw, "come inside. I would be more than happy to offer you tea."

 

Seeing Goku's face light up, Sanzo raised one hand. "Thank you, Madame Henshaw. We've already had breakfast."

 

Sanzo suffered himself to be led by Master Henshaw through the front of the building where customers were shown bolts of cloth or garments already made. Then they toured the workroom, with its six sewing machines and four looms and other endless devices for the production of cloth and finished clothing. Sanzo spied a bolt of silk that was almost a perfect match for his own worn, travel-stained robes.

 

"Sanzo-sama," Master Henshaw said, moving around behind Sanzo. "I wonder if I might ask how you and Layla know each other?"

 

Sanzo looked up from stroking the silk. "We're family."

 

"Indeed? And the gentlemen with you?"

 

"My servants. Do you have children, Master Henshaw?"

 

"Three boys and two fine girls, Sanzo-sama."

 

"Then you know how it is to worry about family, to want to see them settled in a happy place, where they can work hard and live well."

 

"I certainly hope we can offer the young lady all of that."

 

"You're very kind, Master Henshaw," Layla said. "To take in a stranger this way...."

 

"When Master Cho told us about all the awful things you've lived through, Willa and I just knew we had to do something to help. We've got the room and we could use the help, so it looks like we were made for each other!"

 

Layla smiled. Sanzo studied her, sensing the real warmth flowing between her and Master Henshaw. He'd already sized up Madame Henshaw as the ideal mother hen. They'd take good care of Layla. Satisfied, Sanzo looked around the workroom at the assembled staff who were all staring at him.

 

"Master Henshaw," he said, "With your permission, I would like to bless your home and workplace. Tenkai knows it's little enough to thank you for giving Layla a new home."

 

Master Henshaw bowed deeply. "One moment, please, Sanzo-sama, while I fetch my wife. She'll want to be here."

 

In the moment they were alone together, even while they were surrounded by a good two dozen workers, Layla spoke.

 

"Thank you, Sanzo-sama. I know you're really going all out to make a good impression."

 

Sanzo took her hand and squeezed it. "That's why I left the traveling circus out front."

 

The Henshaws returned. Sanzo closed his eyes, put his hands together, and began to chant one of the lesser sutras his master had taught him. It was a blessing, sealing in the goodness and keeping out anything evil or tainted. When he was done, he opened his eyes to see tears running down Madame Henshaw's cheeks. On Layla's face there was a look of quiet joy.

 

"Please, Sanzo-sama." Madame Henshaw sniffed and dabbed at her eyes with her apron. "Please, come out into the garden and let me offer you some tea. The peaches are ripe now, and I've just baked some scones."

 

Sanzo hesitated. He needed a moment alone with Layla, then he wanted to get on the road, to be done with this and move on. And yet, every last second with Layla was precious to him. Master Henshaw took a step forward and knocked a tray of thread off a worktable. The spools bounced around Sanzo's feet.

 

"Oh drat! My apologies, Sanzo-sama."

 

Master Henshaw knelt there gathering up the spools in his big hands. Layla hurried to help him, scooping up the spools and chasing down the ones that had rolled farther away.

 

"Willa, why don't you go ahead and take Sanzo-sama and Layla out to the garden. I've got one little thing to see to, then I'll join you."

 

"If you'll follow me, Sanzo-sama?"

 

Madame Henshaw led Sanzo and Layla out through the back of the workshop into a garden bright with flowers, fruit trees, and a fountain where the water flashed and sparkled in the sunlight. Hakkai, Gojyo, and Goku were already out there. Hakkai sat with his back straight, sipping his tea with his usual tidy manners. Gojyo lounged in his seat, one long leg hooked over the arm while he munched on a scone. Goku sat on the grass with his lap full of peaches, his cheeks bulging and juice dripping down his chin. Sanzo's hand automatically plunged into his sleeve, going for his paper fan. Layla took that arm in what was probably a sincere gesture of affection that also kept him from thrashing the stupid monkey.

 

Madame Henshaw bustled around getting Sanzo seated in just the right chair with the just right amount of shade, not too close to the fountain. Then came the endless fussing over his tea and his scone and any other detail that came to Madame Henshaw's mind. Sanzo shot Layla a look that said she'd damn well better be appreciating the way this was straining his patience. Layla smiled and sipped her tea, watching Goku's antics and Gojyo's flirting with one of the girls who kept bringing out more tea and more pastries. Hakkai kept the conversational ball rolling so Sanzo could preserve his appearance of serene wisdom, which was an excellent cover for his desperate need to shoot something.

 

Madame Henshaw kept finding reasons for Sanzo and the others to stay until Sanzo started to think they were being delayed for reasons other than the sheer novelty of having a Sanzo priest pay them a visit.

 

"Your hospitality is truly boundless, Madame Henshaw," he said. "But I'm afraid we have an appointment elsewhere. We need to be on our way."

 

"One moment, please, Sanzo-sama." Madame Henshaw bowed. "Let me fetch my husband so we can give you a proper farewell."

 

She hurried off into the workshop. Only then did Sanzo realize Master Henshaw had not in fact joined them as he'd said he would. The business was thriving, so he no doubt had plenty of work-related matters that needed his attention.

 

The Henshaws came hurrying out of the workshop together. Master Henshaw carried a large rectangular package under one arm. Apprentices came rushing out of the workshop to gather behind Master Henshaw. Their faces were all alight with anticipation.

 

"Sanzo-sama," Master Henshaw said. "We are so very grateful for your kindness in coming here today. We thank you for the blessing, and we thank you for Layla, who will be a constant reminder of your holy watchfulness."

 

Sanzo heard the meaning in Master Henshaw's words. Master Henshaw perceived a great deal more than he let on. Sanzo was pleased to know his main purpose in showing himself to be Layla's sponsor had been understood. The big man sank to his knees and held out the box.

 

"Please, Sanzo-sama, accept this with our most respectful wishes for your pleasure and comfort."

 

Sanzo took the lid off the box. Inside it lay a new set of robes, sewn from the silk he'd admired earlier. Sanzo lifted the robes out of the box. He'd have to try them on to be sure, but they looked to be an excellent fit. Now he understood why Master Henshaw had kept moving around him, and all that business of knocking the spools over. It had all been a way for Master Henshaw to estimate Sanzo's measurements.

 

"Is there somewhere I can change into this?"

 

"Follow me, Sanzo-sama." One of the apprentices led him back into the workshop, to a door that led to a small parlor and washroom.

 

***

 

Minutes later Sanzo stepped out into the garden's sunshine, resplendent in pure, clean silk. He looked radiant, glorious, enough to make Layla's heart thunder inside her. The apprentices burst into applause. Sanzo walked through the crowd to the Henshaws, who were both beaming.

 

"Thank you," Sanzo said. "I will treasure these robes as confirmation of the kindness and generosity of the people in whose care I must leave Layla."

 

Layla took that as her cue to step forward. "Master Henshaw, Madame Henshaw, could you please excuse me for just a few minutes, so I can say goodbye?"

 

"Of course, dear." Madame Henshaw started shooing the apprentices back inside. Soon the garden was empty but for Layla and her four heroes.

 

She went to Goku first, where he still sat happily munching peaches. She crouched down to ruffle his hair.

 

"Be good for Sanzo, OK? Don't make him too crazy."

 

For a moment those big golden eyes focused on her. "I'll miss you, Layla. It was nice having you around."

 

"Thanks, Goku. I'll miss you too."

 

Layla walked over to Hakkai where he stood admiring the fountain.

 

"Thanks for finding me such a good place."

 

Hakkai smiled a real smile. "I had to. You think Sanzo would have let me get away with leaving you anywhere that wasn't perfect?"

 

Layla laughed. "You'd have been in for some nasty paper cuts, that's for sure."

 

She took Hakkai's hands and leaned up to kiss his cheek. "Thank you, Hakkai. Gojyo won me, but you're the one who made sure I had a bath and new clothes and all those things. You really did understand what I'd been through, and what I needed."

 

"Take care, Layla. We'll miss you."

 

Layla took a deep breath, then walked over to Gojyo where he stood lounging against the trunk of a tree.

 

"Hey," he said. "They look like good people."

 

"They do." Layla moved closer to Gojyo, aware of Sanzo's burning amethyst gaze. "There's something I want to say to you. Something important."

 

Gojyo straightened up. "OK."

 

"You've been with enough women to know that there are different kinds of love. Right?"

 

"Right."

 

"So when I tell you I love you, can you understand that I mean it?"

 

Gojyo looked at her for a long moment, then looked away. "Is this some kind of weird variation on 'Let's just be friends'?"

 

"No. This is 'I love you, Gojyo, and I always will.'" Layla put her hand in her skirt pocket and pulled out one of her hair ties with the yellow wooden flowers. She held it out to Gojyo on the palm of her hand. "I want you to keep this so you'll remember the day you saved not just my life but my sanity and my dignity and my hope and my existence as a human being."

 

Her breath hitched, and her eyes clouded with tears.

 

"I know how much it hurts you, that I can't let you love me the way you want to. I don't need that to love you the way I do." She reached up to touch the scars on his face. "I don't need anything from you, Gojyo. You're you, and that's fine. That's what I love."

 

Gojyo stared down at her. He closed those beautiful crimson eyes, making the gathering tears spill down his cheeks. He took the hair tie and raked his long red hair back from his face, tying it into its usual sloppy ponytail. Then those long arms swept Layla into a rib-creaking hug.

 

"I love you too, honey. You stay safe, OK?"

 

Layla held onto Gojyo just as tightly as he held her. "Sanzo told me why you're heading west. Not all of it, but I know it's really serious. You come back to me, understand? You come back and let me love you my way."

 

"Sanzo won't like that."

 

"When have you ever let that stop you?"

 

Gojyo burst out laughing, so hard his knees gave and he collapsed on the grass, dragging Layla down with him. That was enough to bring Sanzo over, paper fan in hand, ready to lay into Gojyo. And, one last time, Layla got in the way. She scrambled up onto her knees and caught Sanzo's wrist.

 

"Please, Sanzo, we were just laughing."

 

Gojyo stood up and lifted Layla up onto her feet.

 

"Yeah, Sanzo-sama. I didn't grope your sweetie."

 

Sanzo snatched the fan with his free hand and landed a good whack on Gojyo's ear before Layla could drag him out of range.

 

"Put the fan away, Sanzo-sama, unless you're planning to beat me too."

 

"I ought to." Sanzo stuffed the fan back into his sleeve. "Don't you know better by now than to get within arm's reach of that stupid kappa?"

 

She wrapped her arms around Sanzo's waist and settled her head beneath his chin. "Hold me, Koryuu. One last time."

 

The use of his real name dispelled Sanzo's temper and brought his arms around her. A moment's hush fell between them. Only the sound of the water playing in the fountain broke the stillness.

 

"Come with me." Sanzo took Layla by the hand and led her along the pathway made of tiled stepping stones until they were another two rows of fruit trees deeper into the garden, still close enough to hear the others but safely out of sight.

 

Sanzo wrapped his arms around Layla, holding her tight while he rested his cheek against her hair. Her relief so intense it made her shake, Layla breathed in the scents of sandalwood, cigarette smoke, gunpowder and oil and the faint perfume of white flowers.

 

"Promise me something," Sanzo said. "I know how badly you want to forget what's happened to you, but it's vitally important that you remember."

 

"Please, Sanzo, I can't--"

 

"Listen to me! You must never forget how strong you can be when the moment calls for it. You may need that strength, to save yourself and others." Sanzo held Layla at arm's length and stared into her eyes. "There is no shame in killing when you kill to protect the weak and innocent."

 

"Yes, Sanzo-sama. I promise."

 

"Good." He kissed her forehead, then slipped one hand into his sleeve. "I have something for you." He pulled out a small wooden box carved all over with leaves, flowers, and tiny birds. Taking Layla's hand in his, he set the box on her palm.

 

Layla studied the box, spotting the hinges on one side. She opened the lid. There, nestled on a square of white silk, was a ring. Set in the gold band were five jewels. An amethyst and an aquamarine sat side by side, two small faceted ovals. On each side of the two larger jewels sat a single tiny diamond. Between the amethyst and the aquamarine sat a third diamond, larger than the other two, glittering with rainbow fire.

 

"Sanzo!" Layla stared at the ring, eyes wide with shock.

 

"Do you like it?"

 

"It—it's us! You and me, together...."

 

"Exactly." Sanzo took the ring out of the box and slipped it onto the ring finger of Layla's right hand. "Will you wait for me?"

 

She looked up at him, confused. Then understanding dawned. "You can't mean -- "

 

"That's exactly what I mean."

 

Sanzo brought her hand to his lips. When he spoke, his voice, always so harsh and gruff, softened into gentleness itself, bringing to Layla's mind the voice of Koumyou Sanzo.

 

"Once I've done what I have to do, I'll be coming back this way. Will you wait for me?"

 

"Forever." Layla wrapped her arms around Sanzo's waist, holding him tight. "I'd rather be alone than have any man but you."

 

Sanzo's arms closed around her in a fierce embrace. He buried his face in her long hair, his lips tracing the curve of her ear. When he spoke, she almost didn't hear it over the pounding of her heart.

 

"I love you."

 

"Koryuu." Layla fought to steady her voice. "I love you. More than anything."

 

"I will come back to you, Layla." Sanzo rubbed his cheek against her hair. "One way or another, you will see me again. That's the promise I make to you."

 

***

 

The jeep had been on the road about half an hour. Nobody had been saying much out of respect for Sanzo's loss. Of course it was Goku who broke the silence.

 

"Hey, Sanzo?"

 

"What?"

 

"If you weren't a monk, would you marry Layla?"

 

Sanzo contemplated the glowing end of his cigarette. "Yes, Goku. I believe I would."

 

"Will wonders never cease?" drawled Gojyo.

 

"Shut up, kappa. You're just jealous because Layla likes Sanzo more than she likes you."

 

"Oh, so now you're an expert on how women think, you stupid monkey?"

 

"Layla is way too classy for the likes of you, you pervert!"

 

"Is that so? C'mere, monkey! I'm gonna kick your ass!"

 

The sunlight glittered off the barrel of Sanzo's pistol. He held it aimed at the sky and thumbed off the safety. Goku and Gojyo shut up so fast Sanzo heard their teeth clack together.

 

"If you can keep your mouths shut for the next two hours, we'll eat somewhere decent tonight. If you can stay quiet all the way through dinner, I might buy you a bath. If nobody earns a whack on the head until morning, well then, who knows how good a mood I might be in?"

 

In the rear view mirror, he watched Goku and Gojyo stare at each other, then shrug. They expected him to be depressed over "losing" Layla. Fine. Let them think that.

 

"Um, Sanzo? May I ask a question, please?"

 

Only Goku's extreme courtesy won him a nod.

 

"Do you think I might ever find a lady as nice as Layla?"

 

"Sorry, Goku." Sanzo shook his head. "There's only one Layla."

 

And she's mine.

 

END

Owari