Slayers Fan Fiction ❯ Forbidden ❯ Chapter 1

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Forbidden
By: Silver Star

I never meant to fall in love with you.

But then again, no one really meant to fall in love with
anyone, did they? Just as Lina never meant to fall in love with
Gourry, or Zelgadis never meant to fall in love with Amelia.
But unlike me, they have a chance. Their loved ones at least
loves them back.

You're a demon, a Mazoku, the Alpha of your pack. And
you were the one who destroyed thousands of my kind. How
can I ever love you? And how can you really love me back?

You have no soul, no heart; you're not made to feel
feelings like love, hope, or maybe even friendship. A simple
sentence like "Life is wonderful," could reduce your powers
down to half of the original amount. You thrive on fear, pain,
and anger. You kill without a second thought, sometimes just
for the fun of it. After all, you killed thousands of the Golden
Dragons during the war, and perhaps more humans than we
can ever count.

I'm one of the Golden Dragons, a priestess of the Golden
Dragons in fact. I can't love you. I'm forbidden to love even
one of my own kind, let alone a demon that killed so many of
us.

I tried to deny it in the beginning. I called you raw
garbage to hide the feelings I had for you, even to myself. But
I can't do that any longer. It's all too much for me. I had
crafted a cup to hold the emotions back and found my
emotions over flowing, impossible to hold.

Sometimes, I wondered why you hadn't killed me already.
I certainly was being quite annoying and hostile to you. It's
not like I can defeat you if you ever decided to kill me. You,
who had killed thousands of the Gold Dragon with one blast,
how hard can it be for you to kill a lone Dragon Priestess?

There was once I fancied that you actually did love me, or
at least liked me, and that was why you spared my life. But I
no longer hold that illusion anymore. I'm just a plaything at
the moment for you. Once the thrill of annoying the hell out of
your enemy is gone, you probably wouldn't hesitate to kill me.

I've been meaning to ask you, why were you following
Lina? Is it because...because you love her? I certainly can
understand why. She was, and still is, one of the most
powerful black sorceresses in the world. She had defeated
many dark lords, prevailed against unthinkable odds, and yet,
she was still the happy-go-lucky girl that fires a Dragon Slave
for the smallest faults.

There was nothing to bar your way; you and her are not
the bitterest enemies, after all. Perhaps the only thing that
bars your way to her would be...Gourry. Lina never leaves
him, and he never leaves her, sometimes I wonder if it's
possible to separate them at all. They follows each other like
puppy-dogs, yet, they hide their feelings from each other that
it's painful to watch.

Do you ever feel pain while watching them, like how it
hurts me when I watched you? So near, yet so far away...

Even if you do love me, impossible as it is, it simply
would not work. The Elders would never let me. The Demon
Race and the Dragon Race had always been enemies. Not one
day went by without the Dragons cursing the existence of your
kind.

Perhaps...perhaps I could at least tell you of my feelings?
And then what? You'd probably laugh in my face and
embarrass me in front of the others. No, I won't loose my
pride along with the heart that you took away from me without
knowing. It's the only thing I had left. I had broken my vows
to the Fire Dragon God, and nothing will ever restore that. All
I had left now is my pride and myself.

And I will clutch that pride and held myself high, even as
I watch my heart being crushed in your hands. I will not loose
my dignity and give you the chance to gloat in my face as you
reduced my heart to dust.

No, as long as I live, I will not give in.