Sonic Series Fan Fiction ❯ Death Of The Guardian ❯ Enter Randy ( Chapter 8 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Knuckles was in Rouge's just chilling watching The Simpson's when some one was pounding on her door "aaaaa!" he hissed as he opened the door a tall guy with dark hair with Jerry Curls half Black/half Irish tall and skinny with a huge gap in his mouth wearing blue jeans and anime shirt "so you must be Knuckles?" "yes."

"Silence!!" he hissed "I am Randy Bullock agent to Lindsay Thorndyke as well as the crazy click I am now your agent" " look boy you get one thing straight" "silence!" "you give me 30% of what you make" "don't cut me off again!" "Silence!!" "I can cut you off any time I want!" Knuckles runs off and gets Shadows guns "I said you don't cut me off kid I do what I want whenever I want understand!" Randy now shocked "I said silence!" Just then C.T. showed up nodding his head "you failed you should have shot this fool right then and there" "hey that's not right" " neither was that Dr that slapped you when you were born" "silence!" "look son you don't ever try to hustle me on the Echidna ever again we are crazy but were not stupid!" now scram before I give the word" "silence!" "You do not threaten me I am here for my 30%" "word" the entire click shows up with guns drawn "now you have 2 choices a)3% or b) a surprise!"

"a) I choose a!" Well what was b) "30%" " whaaaaa!!" "Remember this NEVER GET COCKY WITH A DIPLOMAT!!"

Randy scuttles off mumbling CT looks at Knuckles just kidding you passed not killing him the first time he said silence look I just came here to drop off this C.T. hands him a badge "you are now a full diplomat!"

Knuckles had a joyful smile as they left, he went back inside doing a black flip "I got it!" as he raises his hands in victory.

-----Sonic's apt---

Shadow on the love seat snoring and talking in his sleep "I am the ultimate life form

Zzzzzzzz" "Maria I don't want to go to school zzzzzzzzz"

Sonic asleep in Amy's arms he awakes to hear some loud snoring he sees Shadow snoring loudly talking in his sleep Sonic woke up next to Amy he gently removes her arms from his waist crawled next to Shadow and started shaking him violently "wake the fuck up!" he said softly "I am the ultimate life form" zzzzzzz Sonic now annoyed starts shaking him violently "quit snoring people need sleep!!" "Maria leave me alone!" zzzzzzzzzzzz Sonic shakes him some more "Shut the fuck up nigga damn!" Shadow just looked at him and dosed off 5 sec later he did it again. Sonic grabbed a pillow and covered his ears trying not to hear that loud racket Amy wraps her arms around him in her sleep as she whispers "let him snore he's at peace. As she starts kissing him he falls back to sleep. (awwww)

Morning comes Sonic is the first to wake up everyone was still asleep and Shadow was still snoring "how does Rouge put up with that, oh never mind she listens to her self fuck Tails" heads into the kitchen he opens the fridge the only thing in the fridge a 40 oz of O.E. "oh well breakfast is served" he opens it up and starts to drink it belching loudly waking up Amy and Bleu. Amy looks at Sonic drinking malt liquor for breakfast "gee I didn't think you had it this bad." Sonic replies with a load belch that woke up Rouge and Bleu " ewwwww your gross"

hissed Amy Bleu just nodded Shadow just grabs an empty mayo jar "pour me some" asks Shadow Sonic poured a tiny bit Shadow just looked at him "you cheap bitch ass nigga!!" after a while Tails comes out wearing a robe smoking a cigarette as he heads into the bathroom

10 min later after some odd moaning noises Tails comes out "no body should go in there for 35-45 min" Shadow starts stretching and yawning as he heads in the bathroom he comes out "Oh dear God something must of crawled up there and died!!!!" "Plus your out of toilet paper." "Since when do guys pee sitting down" Sonic smirked Shadow ignored him he left to a store and came back with some Toilet paper and air freshener.

After a while he comes out but the place smells like lilac "gee thanks a lot now you got my place smelling like a chick bathroom" "hey you want me to call Knuckles, he gets here pretty quick." "Sure but he can't beat me" as Sonic sips from the 40 oz.

Sonic then poured some more for Shadow till the jar was half full. Rouge comes in wearing a twin robe smoking a pipe (it was that good) "sorry bout last night" Tails said blushing "but you saw worse remember" "don't say it!!" "Ok I wont tell any one about the time you saw Eggman jack off!" Sonic sighed in relief (I will tell you later)

Rouge reached over to give Tails another hicky on his right side "now he has a twin" "Rouge how do you sleep with Shadow snoring?" "Simple ear plugs or fucking Tails" "I did not need to hear that" "did you ever sleep with Shadow" "Sonic!!" Tails hissed! As he smacked him upside the head "sorry hon I won't confirm or deny it" Shadow just smirked as he finished his drink "gee you don't have any food" "sorry I didn't go shopping after Mario got jumped plus I'm broke." "I don't get my food stamps till next week!"

Sonic finished the 40 oz and put it with a series of others "well gets go shopping or at least get some breakfast." "Who's buying?" Asks Tails "either you or Rouge since you got a job" "I will pay for Sonic smiled Amy Bleu and Amy left to change Tails and Rouge changed as well Sonic and Shadow got ready "this time I use Chaos Control!"

"What's wrong with the car?" Asks Tails as he comes out wearing blue jeans and red t-shirt with black Timberland boots

"no way are we riding in the trunk" Sonic and Shadow said in unison "have it your way" smiled Rouge wearing a tight white t-shirt showing her busty figure with blue shorts on with white socks and black Nike shoes Amy was taking forever (if you must know she was stuffing tissue in her bra to make her look busty) Bleu comes out wearing the same out fit as Rouge "now we look like twins" the bats say in unison after a while Amy come out in a skimpy black dress looking busty (fake) with slip on black shoes "all right everybody" stand next to me Shadow orders every one does Rouge and Tails hold hands Shadow pulls out a red chaos emerald "Chaos Control!!" every one leaves in a flash of red light.

------Knuckles in the studio-----

Knuckles is producing his own beats he is now gloveless his red hands are working away as his new spiked gloves are in his belt being held singing to the tune of "Popeye, the Sailor Man"

When I can't stop my withdrawing'
I just takes me Vicoden
I'm poppin' and sailin', echidna man!(toot! toot!)

C.T. just looks at him all stupid "man The Simpson's are going to be pissed!" Knuckles looks dumb "d'oh!!!" C.T. just smiles "it's ok you may piss people off" "woo hoo!!!" Knuckles says

"Here is another one I stole"

Knuckles starts to sing

“I take a whisky drink, I take a vodka I take a malt liquor drink I take a chocolate drink, And when I have to pee, I use the kitchen sink. I sing the song that reminds me I'ma urinating guy.

C.T. just nods his head "look K.T. if you need motivation just take a break"

Just them Randy shows up. "That's just dandy!!!" "Are you working hard" "of course we are why don't you make some music too."

"I won't make music because" he lifts up his fists in a fighting stance and moves back and forth and sings "I'm a natural born hustler, natural born hustler" as he moves back and forth C.T. raises his fists as he were blacking an attack "stop that!!!" Randy hissed "I can dance shoot!" "you look like you were going to fight I was just defending my self!"

I'll defending my self you!" "mamama I'll defending my self you!" C.T. says mocking him "silence!!" he hissed "no body mocks me"a female voice sings (no body mocks Randy Dandy "except for me" C.T. said "I said silence!!" "Oh could you lighten up" Knuckles said "I will not lighten up, you should lighten up!"

C.T. smiles "look son your are becoming a big boy now calm down it's called going thru puberty" "your going thru puberty, I'm a man little boy!!" "if you're a man I run the Eggman empire" Knuckles begins to laugh "Silence mere echidna!!!" Knuckles puts on his gloves ready to fight

C.T. gets in between them "ladies, ladies there is plenty of C.T. to go around" he said jokingly. "Knuckles take a break just go to your friends I know they are in Oakland" "Oakland?"

"Yeah I was over there a few months back and Big Bo with Smiley were there just hanging out" "Ok sure thing" Knuckles jumps out the window and glides to his car and drives off. C.T. looks at Randy all passionately. "Kids grow up so fast." "Oh could you stop!"

C.T. acts all normal as he pulls out some Vicoden and pops them washing them down with cherry coke as Randy sings while snapping his fingers

"he's just popping those pills,poppin those pills!!" smiling

"Remind me to steal the master emerald and put it in that damn gap oh wait you might swallow it."

"That's enough!!!!" he hissed "calm down don't get your panties in a twist" "I'll panty twist you!" Look I have to go mind the studio if am2pm shows up tell her to remix that echidna mix" "who is that?" "Alyssa you moose twit!!!" "stop calling me names!!!" "awww the little boi gwat his fewllign turt! "Silence!!!!" "look I is out stay black and smoke crack!"

Randy just nods his head as C.T. leaves.

---------Back in Oak Town-----

The whole gang is out side touring the rundown city when an old Korean shows up real pissed off with a stick. "Oh shit" said Sonic "I is outta" here he runs off "what was that all about?" asks Amy now worried Tails blushing said "he shot up the guys store after he insulted his momma" "ha the bastard missed his mark I guess" smirked Shadow Amy smacked him up side the head.

After a while the Old man stopped and was panting Sonic made a u-turn snuck up behind him tapped him on the sholder he turned around and got punched in the face as he fell back he was punched in the stomach as he falls down Sonic starts kicking him "don't ever talk abut my momma!!!!" the group look on in utter shock as Sonic spits on him and walks away.

"My, my what a temper" smiled Shadow Amy confronted Sonic "what is wrong with you?, shooting up liquor stores beating up people for stuff and beating up old people? You really changed Sonic and it scares me!" tears flow from her green eyes as Sonic hugs her "I feel like a failure Cosmo is no more Eggman who know where he is" *cough* ICU*cough* said Tails

"how did he get there?" Sonic looked at the fox a tear fell from his eye as rouge rubbed his back "he was drunk and peed on Cosmo, Shadow and Knuckles barely were able to hold me down after I beat the shit out of him."

"Also I got into a fight defending Rouge's honor too." "Damn kid you really can take care of yourself" smiled Sonic now feeling somewhat better as Amy held him so where do we go "I know a great burger shack it's still early we can make it too it's only a five min walk from here." "they have a kick ass breakfast" "fuck 5 min how bout 5 sec's Chaos Control!" Shadow said as they left again.

---Burger Shack------

As they enter they are shocked to see Knuckles dressed like an Arab sitting there eating a breakfast plate drinking grape drink.

Knuckles just looked at them smiling "just because I got it made doesn't mean I am not hood rich." Rouge smiles at him "ha you stay in a shack in Babylon!" "So who's you twin?" "Oh remember Bleu from that photo this is her", Bleu smiles at him "hello" she said in soft French accent. So Knuckles head how did you get here so fast Knuckles Pointed out side to his car then pulled out a white Chaos Emerald. "Oh yeah Tails I owe you some of that jellied gas I was short and I used some with some moon shine some junkie gave me for this."

He pulled out a mix tape (CD) that read "K.T. Echidna Last Of A Dying Breed" yeah I made it.

Tails now annoyed "thanks a lot Knucklehead it ain't easy to make Napalm!!" Knuckles looks like he saw a ghost "you… have… Napalm?"

"Ok everybody lets eat!" They all lave to the counter and get their food.

Sonic and Tails get the big breakfast and split it Rouge and Bleu get the French sampler Amy and shadow just have the simple platter they each get one after wards they all sit with Knuckles eating and talking "is it true you beat shadow in a race? Sonic asks. "Damn right I have Tails and Rouge to back it up!" "but" said Tails "like I said Tails and rouge to back it up!" Knuckles look at Tails as in play along "I say you challenge me" "nah keep your dignity."

Sonic now annoyed "come on big shot I ain't scared!!' sigh* " your funeral" after they finish eating Shadow pulls out his red emerald Knuckles puss out his white emerald there are all around his car "behold the ultimate power!! Chaos Control!!" everybody and the car leave to a river area. "Ok see what you got Knuckles bring it on!!!" Rouge gets in the middle with her hands up Knuckles gets in his car revs it up Sonic looking all cocky as he is ready Rouge drops her hands as every body watches they are off.

Sonic is in the lead Knuckles shifts gears and pushes the NaS gauge to the max a now instead of red fire its now green super charged Sonic is left in the dust as he is running so fast his feet are on fire Knuckles wins by the nose of the car Sonic is now bare foot as he is running looking for a watering hole after he finds one "ssssssssssssss" "aaaaaaaaaahhhhhh" Sonic is relaxed after he gets out he is bare footed he removes what's left of his socks his shoes are completely dissolved.

Knuckles smiles as he removes a new pair of shoes and tosses them to Sonic with socks to match Sonic just gives a grin. " You can't win them all" he says that was the boost he needs

"How many people can fit in that car anyway?" "2" "Icallshotgun!!" yells Shadow(I call shot gun) Shadow gets in as they drive off "oh great now what?" said Tails Sonic pulls out a bus pass I was saving this for a long time now it's time to use it."

"5 people can ride for the price of one!" Just them they see Smiley "man I just got out man spare some change to get home man?" "dude you just got out a few months back!!" said Tails

"I know but they locked me up again man damn a brotha can't get a break!" Amy looks in her purse and gives him some bus fare "here buy a pass and some food." "Thanks sista I owes you one" "can I hang with you I think you friend won't look like a 5thwheel" Sonic give a look "fine but don't do anything stupid!"

As the 6 leave Sonic asks "what did you do this time?" "dude this huge turtle with a leather jacket and red hair with horns with spikes on his back offered me a girl she was in a pink dress with long blond hair she was a dude!!! I was like man fuck that shit the next thing I was in jail man!!!!" "As I was handcuffed a tall skinny plumber was laughing his skinny ass off."

Sonic Closed his fists "Luigi that bastard!!" "we need to get to the hospital."

As they head to the bus stop Knuckles comes back with a trailer hitched to the car looks like you ladies need a lift Sonic, Tails, and Smiley all say in unison "fuck you!" "awww you hurt my feelings no ride for you!" "Sorry Knuckles" as they enter Sonic says "to the hospital and step on it" the next thing you know they arrive as they enter Amy asks "who are we going to see?" "a close friend" as they enter the room they see a guy in a yellow out fit with a zigzag moustache who looks like Mario he is feeding Mario pasta "Oh hello Sonic" "this is my a life partner Wario" he smiles all evil at them.

"Well that same bitch got me back in jail man!!" "oh mama mia!" "Easy now a you're a new body chip is still fresh we will get hat son ma bitch real a soon a!"

"Well glad to see your all right pal these are my other friends"rouge and her cousin Bleu, Amy Rose, Knuckles and the ultimate life form but you can cal him Shadow.

Every body at once "hi" well we must go plan for tomorrow "fuck that let's go to the clubs in fag city!" smiled Rouge "what is this Fag city" asked Bleu "well it's called San Francisco there are a lot of gay's and lesbians as well and transgender people over there" stated Tails

"Someone did their homework" smiled Rouge at Tails "let's go there" Shadow pulled out his emerald "Chaos Control!!" every one leaves as Wario and Mario look in awe "they a seem nice a" said Wario "true but the blue one a is a bitt a too cocky a!!"

------Nightlife------

"Well were here" smiled Shadow "but we have no club clothes" said Amy Rouge and Bleu in unison *sigh* Shadow sees a clothes shop but is closed "must I use my power?" he head to the back alley where a drunken chimpanzee is sitting down on the floor with his pants down jacking off he ignores him and "Chaos Spear" he shuts off the power he returns. "Ladies" the girls all gather around him "Chaos Control!" they teleport into the shop but it's dark and can't see Rouge pulls out a flashlight from her purse after ward they are getting each a new outfit in this order

Bleu-a tight sky blue skirt that's wavy at the bottom barely covering her knees with matching top and shoes (her name suits her)

Rouge-skintight black dress above her knees with matching shoes

Amy-pink short skirt and black shirt with white shoes.

Shadow-hell naw is he going in drag!!

"Well, well I guess stealing jewels is not what you steal as well" smiled Knuckles lighting a join as Tails smacked him up side the head.

Gee calm down can you take a joke. Tails looked at him all crazy you really love her the sex must be good smiled Knuckles Tails now really annoyed smacked him even harder up side the head. "Keep smoking that crap next time I smack you I can hear your brain or what's left of it rattle!!" said Tails as Rouge is grouping him "you really know how to defend a lady Renard" smiled Rouge as they make out under the night light. "Get a room!" Hissed Sonic "are you jealous of them?" asks Amy "no it's just wrong come on, I should be with a girl first he should be the 3rdwheel not me!" "I think your just upset he got the girl on his own." Sonic now thinking to himself "damn she reads me like a book."

"Man cut the bullshit!!" said Smiley "hate the player not the game." Just then they se a tall blond girl* in a pink dress. " Man that's the bitch that go me locked up." Sonic saw "her that bitch is the one who set up Mario!"

(A/N: * means the girl is a guy and vice versa)

Sonic now enraged becomes Dark Sonic "you bastard!!!" he homing attacks the he/she "hey what the fuck?" As peach falls to the ground he grabs her* "who sent you to get Mario jumped?!"

Sonic kicked her in the groin "don't make me ask again!" as he pulls out a gun. "Ok, ok it was Luigi he went to my pimp Bowser for help Bowser and Mario go a long way back please don't kill me!!!"

Sonic leaves as he turns to normal Smiley runs over and starts kicking Peach "you stupid ho set me up I was locked up because of you!!!" And you're a guy Smiley don't play that, that isn't cool stupid ass ho!!!" Peach now laying there bleeding and unconscious "see now look at ya see this neva would of happened!!!"

Sonic now peeved "Smiley get your monkey ass back her we got what we need!"

Smiley gives one last hard kick "this isn't over ho!" and runs off.

"I say it's over" said Knuckles "man fuck this shit blood!!!" hissed Smiley "no really I think she's* dead after you and Sonic jumped her." "Man!!!" "Hey if I'm wrong take it up with C.T." "You know Willie Lump-Lump?" "naw why ?" "Some stupid bitch is the reason he's called Lump-Lump yeah she gave him the clamp twice dude need antibiotics for 2 years before he had sex!! Again man!" "didn't C.T. tell you?" "The only thing he told me was you had sex with some Brazilian guy named Raymundo in jail."

Everyone starts laughing, "Man shut the fuck up!!!" "C.T. is a fucking liar when we get back to the hood I'll plant my foot in his ass man!!"

"Enough of this he say she shit as long as he say he say he on my dick!!!" hissed Tails

"now where is this bar at I'm thirsty." "You drink too much." Said Sonic "the only dangerous amount of alcohol in your body is none" said Knuckles "you watch too much T.V."

"oh here we are the Golden Sun" smiled Tails as he and Rouge enter holding hands a night club with a neon sun winking over huge letter reading "The Golden Sun" a Chinese temple like building red with gold paint real fancy everybody else enters.

They see people dancing some singing Karaoke other at a bar. Plus a stage where comics are.

As pee-wee Herman is on stage he sees Tails and Rouge "hey there those bastards that got me tossed in jail!!!" "yeah those 2 over there fox boy and bat girl! Ha-ha!!"

(Flash Back)

Tails and Rouge are undercover in a hotel they are waiting to be helped as 2 pot head are fighting with him over some bag (A/N: Cheech and Chong's next movie)

"I'm telling you the money is in the bag" "but you can't get your bag till I get the money" after a while they leave to find a way to steal the bag "man there are diamonds in that bag man!" " yes may I help you" "yes my Husband an myself just enjoyed our honeymoon and would like a room for a few nights" "isn't he too young to be married?" he looks at Tails Rouge now annoyed grabs him by the shirt. "Look pip squeak cut the crap and get us that room!" ok here he give them a key and they head up the stairs as he calls up somebody.

Out side the bases heads are in a pay phone "9-1-1 what's your emergency" "yeah these terrorist guys are invading this hotel on flower and 5thhurry!!!"

"Ok what do they look like" "one is wearing a bowtie and grey suit I think he is the leader man" they hang up laughing.

As they see Rouge flying down and peeping in on certain rooms Tails is behind her

"Look man it's Batman" "that ain't Batman that's a girl!" "Batman's a girl man?" "I don't know man but he a pervert man look at him" "who is that fox behind him?"

"Robin man!" "Robin is a bird not a fox man!" "I guess he got a new side kick man!"

Rouge sees a large grey haired fat man with some young blond girl in bed. As Rouge breaks in the window the girl screams "who in God's name are you" said the man as he covers himself up. I am the terror that lurks in the night I am Rouge Of G.U.N. fuck face!!!" " Your under arrest you sicko!!" Tails flies in and bum rushes him as he put on hand cuffs "you have the right to be silent so I advise you to shut the fuck up!!!" "I want my lawyer!!!" "I said shut the fuck up, you have the right to be bitch slapped!" Tails slaps him in the face.

Tails I think you should let him get dressed Tails grabs some pans and un cuffs him as he pulls out a gun Sirens are herd as tons of police and Gun agents show up over the loud speaker

"This is the police come out with your hands up and no one will be hurt this is your final warning!!!" the guy puts his pants on but quickly pulls out a gun and bang, bang, bang shoots Rouge as the girl screams Rouge just stand there now pissed off "look what you did to my out fit you know how much it cost to replace bullet proof Luis Vatton?!" her heart has bullet holes in it all you see is a black substance under it The guy is now scared as Tails has his gun drewn and shoots him the girl screams and runs out side as she is wrapped in a sheet more guests run out side as the police are ready guns drawn 2 officers come out side holding Pee-Wee by the arms like a prisoner as he screams "hey let me go I'm fragile!!" just then the pot head go up to the police "that's the guy man you got him!!" Rouge and Tails exit she approaches a guy "yep that him the terrorist" as they load Pee-Wee in the Patty Wagon the pot heads are holding a recorder as they enter the hotel and get their bag.

"Thanks a lot rouge you killed the main guy!" "He left me no choice look at this" she removes her heart to show a bullet bruised chest. "Damn!" "fine that a break."

(end flash back)

"Yeah you bastards took my life away damn you damn you all to hell!!" Just then a fat motorcycle chick showed up and grabbed him as he screamed he was taken away.

Just then Knuckles sees Randy singing as people boo him he is dragged off the stage screaming "you can't treat a hustler like this!!" Knuckles just smiles "what's so funny" asks Sonic "oh nothing but your face Burn!" As he high 5's Tails.

(A/N: Well another good CH the best is yet to come I promise a lot of action!! Too.)