Sorcerer Hunters Fan Fiction ❯ 30_Kisses - Glacecest - 24 - Good Night ❯ Chapter 1

~30 Kisses~

~24: Good Night~

 

 

 

Every night without fail, Marron would wish his brother a good night.

 

It was one of those things that Carrot had grown accustomed to over the years - the day would play itself out, there would be a mission or it'd be a day of relaxation... the two of them would return to their bedroom at the end of the day and Marron would always always end the day with "oyasumi, niisan"... it didn't matter whether the day had been a hard one to bear, if something bad had happened, if something good had happened... even if Carrot was in a bad mood and few words had been shared during the course of the day, even if Carrot had done something stupid and earnt Marron's withering stares for most of the past evening, Marron would still end the day with this small habit.

 

The days had been somewhat hectic of recent, however. The near-resurrection of the Destruction God Hakaishin... the near-destruction of the Spooner Continent and the world it sat upon... the plots of the Four Lords of Darkness, that business with Mousse... events seemed to track back through and before things became hectic and dangerous. Yet eventually they had passed and the world was safe again.

 

The world was safe and Carrot was due to be wed.

 

It was natural to be nervous on the wedding night, of course. Any man would have wedding-night jitters and surely Carrot Glacé would moreso than others... were things not rushed somewhat? Now that Tira was the expectant bride... she could blush innocently enough but it didn't take much recollection to remember the Tira who would laugh and crack her whip and request that people call her Queen... anybody would be nervous on the night before their wedding. Thinking of what things might await after the following day provided little if any comfort. Tira had at least been quite quiet and shy and nervous these last few days, that was to be expected... still, that shadow hung in the hearts and minds of some if not others.

 

Marron had also been quite quiet, of course. He always had been, but this time... this time he seemed different somehow. Carrot noticed this.

 

That last night before the wedding, they spent together.

 

Most of the evening had been Marron encouraging Carrot that he was doing the right thing... and this was rather difficult given that Marron really didn't know how firmly he could echo this repeated sentiment. Carrot was doing the right thing. This was the best thing to do. No, he wouldn't regret it. No, niisan. Definitely not. I promise you, niisan.

 

It was hard for Marron to lie, but compared to the situation at stake... it was the right thing, wasn't it? After what had happened... it'd make Tira happy... it seemed that she really loved Carrot after all, so... surely that would make Carrot happy?... The most important thing was Carrot's happiness. That had always been the most important thing from Marron's point of view. To ensure Carrot's safety, his comfort, his happiness... yet this was a situation unlike any other. It couldn't be predicted and Marron was about as sure as Carrot seemed to feel. Would this keep Carrot safe? Not that Tira wouldn't be concerned about Carrot's safety, but it wasn't a safety that Tira could prevent that worried Marron... would she ever hurt him? This... didn't seem likely somehow, but... her love seemed to be expressed in strange ways and it seemed inevitable that Carrot was entering into a life of bondage in the most literal sense... did he mind that? Marron hadn't wanted to ask. Hadn't wanted to throw any unnecessary - or necessary - doubts upon exactly what it would be that Carrot would undertake come the morning.

 

Everything was arranged for the event. The church had been booked, the afterward reception had been sorted... it was supposedly bad luck to see the bride's dress before the day or something, Carrot hadn't been sure on quite what that was but hadn't wanted to risk it, but... he'd heard that Tira's dress was ready and beautiful, there was the cake and his tuxedo and the carriage and the honeymoon and the wine and the guest list and in the end the thought of it all had made his mind spiral. There seemed so much to take care of and so much to worry about... not that anything could be helped past midnight on the eve of the event, but despite this Carrot had been awake and worrying anyway.

 

At first, Carrot had just taken a small glass of alcohol to perhaps calm his nerves and soothe his worries. This had gone on to two larger glasses before Marron had felt it best to prevent Carrot's mood deteriorating - when people were drunk it was bad enough, but surely for somebody to wake up on the morning of their wedding with a hangover... as bad as Carrot had seemed to feel at that moment, Marron knew that he had the potential to feel much worse on the morning. He'd stopped Carrot's hand and held his gaze...

 

In retrospect, Marron supposed it had been the alcohol that had caused Carrot's reaction, but at the time he'd been far too swayed by his own emotions to really consider this.

 

Carrot asked once more if it was really the right thing to do. Marron had only replied with Carrot's title.

 

They'd stared at each other. It wasn't as if this hadn't been what they'd been talking about for the past couple of hours, but Carrot could still utter such a question with such curiosity in his eyes that would make Marron stop and consider and wonder. Was it? He had no idea anymore. He didn't really want to think about it. He wasn't sure that Carrot wanted to either, but surely there was something that kept his mind ticking and his tongue asking... there wasn't anything that could be done about the situation, right or wrong. If it was the right thing to do, then it was all for the best. If it was the wrong thing to do... that could only be discovered in time.

 

The questions continued on, as if Carrot was expecting some magical answer to fall from Marron's lips. This had gone on for a few hours and Marron was starting to think they'd be taking the argument in circles until daybreak, he couldn't think of anything to say to placate his brother and he couldn't think of anything that would calm his own thoughts...

 

The atmosphere before such an important day was likely to be a strange one in any case. The event itself was one that could cause intent questioning on oneself and one's motives... such a big decision, such worrying thoughts... Carrot had sat on his bed still with his glass of whatever drink that was, Marron hadn't seen quite what bottle Carrot had poured it out of... Marron had paced around the room and listened to Carrot's thoughts, tried to offer his own, tried to comfort Carrot in any way at all that was possible...

 

"This could be the last time."

 

Carrot had said that without really explaining what he'd meant by it. That had been around where the mood had devolved... he'd managed to hold Marron's gaze and Marron had wanted to know what Carrot had meant by that, wanted to know what exactly was the last time, why it had to be the last time, just what Carrot was trying to say... but words suddenly seemed unnecessary and even if Marron didn't know what was meant, Carrot certainly seemed to.

 

Marron worried afterward that he'd taken advantage of his slightly inebriated brother. He hadn't meant to. He wasn't sure that Carrot had either; the alcohol? It had to have been the alcohol. Surely. Of course.

 

This didn't negate the fact that Carrot's voice sounded strangely clear as they lay together; clothes had been discarded and they pressed against one another, Marron's breath coming in nervous gasps and Carrot seeming almost so relaxed... they held their hands together then Carrot moved to stroke Marron's chin and he had a strange sort of smile on his face and there was no doubt as to where this could be leading... and Marron didn't want to seem unsure, not now that Carrot seemed so sure after such doubt of the past few hours, but... asking whether that was what he really wanted... was this what he really wanted? Marron was too scared to ask. He didn't want Carrot to think about it and decide on a negative answer, yet surely this was taking advantage...? This wasn't something that Carrot would do normally. It was the atmosphere. The nerves. The alcohol. The way Carrot's body fit and warmed against his, the way he would shift and cause feeling and smile and cause further emotion...

 

"Oh god..."

 

"Marron?"

 

"Niisan-..."

 

The protest seemed too hard to voice, at first. However, duty was a strong part of Marron's mindset and one word was all it took to let Carrot know of his fears.

 

"Tira..."

 

"Not until tomorrow, Marron."

 

"... Niisan..."

 

There didn't seem to be anything to say against that. Carrot sounded so sure and Marron just didn't want to argue... there was nothing spoken and nothing asked, yet somehow it seemed that Carrot had guessed perfectly. To Marron this almost seemed like too little too late but by this point he wouldn't have argued even a kind glance from Carrot, let alone anything further... so many years and so many thoughts that devolved into things that made Marron feel terrible. Such thoughts he couldn't help but think, feelings he couldn't help but feel... thoughts he knew were wrong and feelings he knew would be contested. Now more so than ever. Tira and Carrot's return on that day that had decided the fate of the Spooner Continent had affected so much more than the wide scope of the rest of the world... the first glimpse of that strong embrace had been enough to know those feelings as good as dead, for any stupid hope to be finally rejected... and yet the Glacé brothers held each other in such an embrace now and this was not something so important as the fate of the world - though perhaps something a lot more important to Marron's personal mindscape - and this had been what he'd always known as forbidden, what thoughts he'd always tried to restrict. Such thoughts were selfish and would never bring Carrot any happiness. Any thought where he would initiate the situation seemed a silly one. Perhaps sometimes it was wise to invest emotion in foolish thoughts.

 

They were not gentle.

 

To say that it could be an expression of feeling between two people... that was essentially what it was, wasn't it? Those who loved tended to make love. Those with passionate desires would take and be taken as the situation decreed. Sometimes the situation became nothing but bestial fucking and it seemed that this was to the level which Carrot and Marron descended on that night.

 

Indeed, there had been things that couldn't be expressed in words. All of the feelings that Marron had had but had never been able to say to his treasured brother. The suspicions that said brother had felt but not wished to mention in case his suspicion was but his imagination. Feelings and emotions and walking that careful path so as to not tread a foot out of line... none of this really seemed to matter anymore. There was feeling and emotion and Marron held Carrot tight between his own body and the wooden headboard of the bed. Perhaps the headboard was loose somehow; it seemed to ring sharp time with Marron's thrusts, each sound seeming too loud and yet indicative of something that should be allowed just for that night. There was nobody else who would hear them. Even if somebody did, who would believe such a thing...? That was their protection.

 

Their world, for that space of time, became made up of things much simpler than they'd been worrying about previously. The rhythm of the wood against the wall. The bodily heat, skin slicked with sweat holding and grasping and slipping and clenching... the world seemed to become that beat they worked for themselves. The sounds that reverberated from wall to wall. Marron meeting Carrot's hot skin and feeling the heat within him rise. Carrot feeling a certain particular other kind of heat rise within him, then retreat... rise again, and retreat... and yet Marron held him close and held him steady.

 

This was the last time they could worry about such things.

 

This was their last chance to indulge in such things.

 

This was their last chance to spend a night together that could be spent together with no further expectation as to outside relationships.

 

This was the last time.

 

Emotion coursed through the body quite nicely but the human body was not invincible and even the most determined individual would eventually succumb to their climax. Carrot remembered that he did and supposed afterward that Marron must have done also, though he held little memory of this and felt sorry for it. Yet Marron seemed exhausted and stared blankly to the side as his breath attempted to catch up with itself... Carrot stared at Marron and wondered how long Marron could be so taken as to honestly ignore him. It might have been a while, Carrot wasn't specifically paying attention to precision. However, eventually Marron turned his head slightly and they looked at each other once more and there was still something there and Marron seemed to find it hard not to look away. He blushed with a rather shamed expression and glanced down only to find his head tipped up again by Carrot's hand. Carrot didn't smile, but his eyes spoke some kind of acceptance.

 

Some things were hard to say and some things were harder to hear. Carrot had started to express a certain basic sentiment before he found himself silenced by one of Marron's fingers pressing against his lips; he dropped to silence as was expected.

 

"... Don't."

 

"... It's true, though."

 

"I-... I know. You don't have to say it for it to be true."

 

"I can't say it anyway...?"

 

"I'd-... I'd rather you didn't."

 

This had not helped to stir Carrot's resolve for the day upcoming. For such an event that had robbed the usually brotherly-emotive Marron of his tongue, Carrot could only feel contempt.

 

"... Was that what you wanted?"

 

"I thought that was my line, niisan."

 

"Yeah, well... this time I'm asking you."

 

"... Yes. I-... ma-... may... maybe I-... can't quite say."

 

"Oh."

 

A silence had fallen between the two brothers. Marron's next sentence seemed rather unprovoked, yet he spoke as if it served as the next logical link in the conversation.

 

"... I could leave, if you wished."

 

"Leave?!"

 

"Tomorrow you will be wed. This-... I'm not sure if this helped. I... believe it might be awkward."

 

"It doesn't have to be..."

 

"It will be."

 

"If you're gonna be like that then it's gonna be..."

 

Another silence, a slightly more uncomfortable one than before. Yes, such a thing could be awkward. However, could they not work with it? It was their secret, nobody else had to know... nobody else would know, unless they were told... it certainly didn't seem something that would be suspected. Marron still somehow seemed less confident when it came to such sentiments.

 

"I might resent her."

 

"Marron?"

 

"After tomorrow."

 

"... Tira."

 

Marron flinched at the name.

 

"... Indeed. Perhaps, for all of our sakes, it would be better..."

 

"Is that what you want?"

 

"... I don't know..."

 

He really didn't. Carrot didn't either; it was a similar situation to Marron's previous feelings. If that was what Marron really wanted to do and something that would really make Marron happy then surely it could only be allowed, but... would that really be what he wanted to do, would it really be something that made him happy? Was it like that, or... was it more that Marron wanted to make himself scarce to avoid an uncomfortable situation? The suggestion had seemed so sudden, that seemed the only conclusion...

 

Nothing more was said on that subject or on much else, but Carrot held Marron as tightly as he dared as he drifted off into his eventual sleep. Determination was determination and Carrot wanted to keep hold of Marron, but as sleep enveloped his body his grip loosened and Marron was able to work himself free. He held himself on all fours above Carrot, staring down at his brother's sleeping face. He leant down and kissed Carrot's forehead, not daring to go further.

 

There was no duty keeping them together now and Carrot would have further responsibilities. He needed to live for those, he needed to learn to live to cope with those... Marron wondered if he would help or hinder if he remained or if he left.

 

Every night without fail to that point, Marron had said it. It didn't matter if he and Carrot were separated, he would still say it. It was the ritual, it was the tradition, it was what marked the end of the day... his voice wasn't above a whisper and his fingers trembled as he stroked Carrot's cheek, but still Marron said it.

 

"Oyasumi, niisan."

 

 

 

~fin~