Tekken Fan Fiction ❯ The Violet and Devil ❯ Not Another Party Fic ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: tory-steller
Kazuya is planning a party, until he wakes up in a dungeon.

Anime/Manga: Tekken Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy / Adventure / Action | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 04.15.2007 | Updated On: 05.01.2007 | Pages: 2 | Words: 2.3K | Visits: 880 | Status: Work In Progress

THE VIOLET AND DEVIL
Ch.1: Not Another House Party
Disclaimer: I do not in any way own tekken or its characters. They are Namco's. I am not making any profit.
Author notes: This is my second humor/adventure fic but my first posted.
Kazuya paced nervously around his 7x16 mile mansion. He and Lee were supposed to be hosting the tekken tournament house party this year. “Damn! Damn! Damn!” he said as he marched furiously through the castle. Lee had to jog to keep up with his favorite stepbrother. Combat mimicked his master's movements. “Where the hell is the entertainment?” yelled Kazuya.
“They said they would be about five more minutes,” replied Lee.
“They said that half an hour ago.”
“They had an emergency. Something about cookie dough in the streets.”
“What the hell does that—?”
The doorbell rings, cutting Kazuya off. “Finally,” says Kazuya. He is sucked into purple electricity, growing wings, fangs, and claws. His eyes glow red for a second, and then they fade into whiteness.
“You have to teach me how to do that,” says Lee
“It's a Mishima thing,” replies Devil in that demonic tone.
“Whatever.” says Lee.
“What eteb.” echoes Combat.
“Oh my god! You can talk.”
“What eter.”
“Amazing! Isn't it amazing?”
Devil had already started to fly the 5 miles it takes to get to the door. His doorbell, which is his entire theme music from tekken two, continues to blare through the seventeen thousand speakers set up around the castle.
When he finally reaches the door, he finds some annoying girl.
“Bonjour Mois—”
“Shut the hell up and get off of my property!”
“But,”
“What! You aren't even French. You're mocking our great gift of freedom, Ms. Liberty.”
“But we aren't in Ameri—”
“Shuthe'llup!” Devil barks as he punts the little girl into his hedge maze, that even with a map and a horse you'd escape in your great-great grandchild's lifetime. (Especially with the hedges being re-enforced with titanium walls, electric fences, barb-wire, sharpened-to-the-point-of-illegalness steel spikes, robotic kraken tentacles, blow-torches, and a doctor's needle.)
After slamming the door, the bell starts to ring again. “What the hell do you want?” yells Devil. After receiving no reply, Devil rips the door off of its hinges to find a welcome mat on his porch saying “You Suck” on it. He looks up to see an old lady walking her dog. She looks his way, screams, and runs away shouting demon. He smirks, blasts at her head with some laser beams, then starts blasting the ground five meters away from his property, moving his head like a pendulum for a moment, walks over to the spot he was blasting, and with a might kick, shoves the other half of the planet into space.
“That'll learn'em.” states Devil as he walks back into his mansion after had sent the whole western hemisphere into oblivion. (Luckily, no one was on it except billions of people including Paul, Steve, Nina, and Anna who were in counseling. Murdock, who was in a motel, and Miharu, who Ling had damned her into the watery depths of hell, Atlantis, because she stole one of her ribbons which was later found out by the police to have “sugar” in a hidden compartment. In Atlantis, Miharu, in her own words said, “I like met this hot merboy teen who like totally saved my life with like a total munch-out, which like let me breathe underwater, which is like so cool, and I would like to thank you for paying for this trip girl.”)
“You couldn't comprehend the stressful day I'm having Lee.” says the Deviled down Kazuya, who was walking back to his stepbrother. “Lee?” he asked. After getting no response, Kazuya shouts, “Damn it Lee, where the hell are…” Kazuya freezes after seeing his stepbrother and combat doing the robot and singing along to Destiny's Child's “Bootylicious”. “What the hell!” growls Kazuya as he punches Lee through a wall.
“Don't touch my mast—”
“Shut up!” interrupts Kazuya. “You're lucky you were even built you glitchy, pathetic, no dick!” yelled Kazuya. “And you,” Kazuya started “If I catch you doing something fruity like that again, I'll kill you and feed your body to my rabid, giant furby.”
“You've been bluffing that one for years. That crazy emo pet of yours is probably dead.”
“Klu-Klu isn't dead.”
“You haven't fed it anything for ten years.”
“So.”
“Even giant, man-eating furbies need food.”
“First, Klu-Klu is immortal, and secondly, if I fed it, it wouldn't be rabid anymore would it?” stated Kazuya.
“Whatever.” replies Lee.
“ Wait, isn't that Jin Kazama's catch phrase. This is strange.”
“Kazuya, what the hell are you talking about.”
“Maybe this author is trying a new tactic.”
“Dude, you're scaring me.”
“And that `dude', I've heard that before too.”
“Man, you're like, trippin'.”
“`Like', `trippin''. Not again. Not again!”
“Kazuya, wake the hell up.” Shouts Lee.
“Huh?” Kazuya pulls his head out of a urinal and looks around. “Where the hell am I?”
“I don't know, you were screaming something about not again and I hit you in the head with that pipe.”
“Why the hell are we in the dark?” asks Kazuya, who notices the night-vision goggles on his head. He tries to stand, but is chained to the wall by the waist. “What the hell?”
“Muwhahahaha!” cackled a disproportional voice. A TV turns on, but it is too bright to see it with the goggles on. “Hello Mishima. Are you comfortable.”
“Wait a second.” Kazuya closes his eyes to think for a moment. “Holy shit Lee, its jigsaw from that torture movie. We're gonna die!”
“Kazuya calm down,” says Lee “It's not jigsaw. It's—“
“Shut the hell up Lee!”
“Screw you bitch! Kazuya its just Nina.” A click is heard, followed by incoherent yelling.
“Damn it Lee!” Nina yells through the TV. Why did you have to expose me?”
“Cause I'm The Violet Bitch!” After yelling that strange but cliché statement, Lee broke loose of his chains and began to yell and glow violet.
“WTF” says Kazuya as he turns into Devil and blasts the night-vision goggles off his head. Lee had started to float upside down and his pants began to get even tighter. Eventually the pants pockets gave in and a mad number of white, violet, and pink pennies started to rain over the dungeon. A transparent violet cape that sparkled began to hover over Lee's back. Lee finally stopped screaming and the violet light started to fade. Lee was now covered in purple spandex.
“Is that it?” asked Nina from the TV.
“No.” groaned Lee, his voice straining.
“Damn Lee, I didn't know there was a gay devil gene.” laughs Devil.
“Shit.” Says a relieved Lee. Then the building explodes.