Tokyo Babylon Fan Fiction / X/1999 Fan Fiction ❯ Lost Souls ❯ XXV ( Chapter 25 )

Dusky twilight colors painted the sky, as if robbing the vibrant hues of daylight from the city to touch the clouds with the last signs of life. The mirrored windows of Tokyo buildings burned with this brightness as well for just a little while longer, and then winked out as the sun fell from their sight. Subaru didn't have time to appreciate it as he almost literally flew to Rainbow Bridge. He hoped he would be on time to stop whoever threatened the kekkai there.

The bridge stood abandoned, despite the hour. People were staying at home these days, unsure of when or where an earthquake would hit. Many were too afraid to take the bridge across the bay for fear it would collapse under them as they drove. Any travel in the city these days was done with trepidation anyway. Then again, staying at home could be just as dangerous.

Subaru was just glad that he could walk uninterrupted to the center of the bridge. Toward the center he came across a garish splash of red, painting the roadway, staining it with the loss of life. A chill ran down his spine, and a terrible thought occurred to him. He felt the remains of dark magic hanging in the air, choking him with the strength of it. He stared for a moment, a feeling of hopeless dread flooding through him.

"Seishirou-san."

"You're just in time, Subaru-kun."

Subaru turned quickly, whirling on Seishirou in confusion and alarm. "You...killed someone here."

Seishirou lifted his bloody right hand, giving Subaru a dangerous smile. "I am the Sakurazukamori, after all." Between two of those crimson painted fingers was a cigarette, which he casually lit now.

The sight filled Subaru with a sick fascination. How could he do that? Blood smeared everywhere, and Seishirou so calmly lifted that so close to his face, inhaling the scent of death along with the burning smoke of the cigarette. The expression on Seishirou's face did not change though. It truly did not matter to him.

"Why?"

Seishirou leveled him with a patient look, still smiling as he took a step closer to Subaru. "You know why."

"You're going to try to destroy this kekkai," he said, defeat and determination swimming in equal measure in his voice.

"You're going to try to stop me. Who do you think will win, I wonder? It has been quite some time since we've truly fought."

"Then why do you look like you're enjoying this?" Subaru cried out.

"Shouldn't I?" Seishirou inhaled another lungful of smoke and let it out slowly. "The last five years--no, since the moment we met, we've been following the path to this moment. It is time for you to remember that."

Subaru backed away as if stung. Those words..."Not again! I won't let you break me again! My soul is not a toy for you to play with and toss aside!"

"Isn't it?" And, Seishirou looked almost kind. Almost regretful. "Do you want to know why you've forgotten? Do you want to know what you have forgotten?"

"No! I just want to stop you! Don't do this, Seishirou-san!"

"So cute, Subaru-kun." Seishirou took a step forward. "If you want to stop me, you know what you must do."

No.

Where were the others? They could stop this. They could prevent this nightmare that was rushing toward Subaru like a runaway train.

But, they couldn't.

"Subaru, the last five years have not been about love and devotion. I have been training you, for this day."

"Stop playing with my mind!"

A flock of doves formed from Subaru's thrown ofuda, flying to attack Seishirou as Subaru jumped away to a better position. He knew they would be no more than a diversion...and the glowing tracers of light from the tip of Seishirou's cigarette filled in to create a barrier that utterly destroyed the magical birds.

"Your family has ever been too concerned with tradition. You can use anything, really, as a focus."

"What do you mean?" Subaru asked, looking up at his lover as they lay beneath the sheets. He still had his head resting against Seishirou's bare chest, listening to his heartbeat as it slowed to a normal pace. He loved doing that...listening because he knew that he'd been the one who could make Seishirou react like this.

"You know the basics of blood magic, for example. When you use your own blood, it increases the power of your focus. Even using your own skin though, as your parchment, you can use the double focus to increase your power."

"I'd prefer not to be bleeding," Subaru said, wrinkling his nose.

"Of course, it's only an emergency measure. Here's another example right here." Seishirou took another drag off of his cigarette and held it up significantly. "Once I've started smoking this cigarette, our essences mingle. The smoke or the glow of the light at the tip can be used to throw together a quick spell."

"Not very permanent," Subaru said, taking the cigarette from Seishirou's fingers and taking a drag of his own before handing it back.

"You trust me so much," Seishirou murmured, running his fingers through Subaru's hair fondly. "No, it's not very permanent, but in battle it can make the difference between winning and dying."

"I never would have thought of that on my own," Subaru mused. "Grandmother would hardly approve."

Seishirou just chuckled, putting the cigarette out in the ashtray and bending to kiss Subaru. Together they settled into the bed once again.

He shook his head to clear it from the vivid memory. Subaru didn't have time for that. He brought his hands together, concentrating not on what was before him but what was behind him. He did love Seishirou. He wanted to protect him and keep this world safe so Seishirou could be in it with him. Or without him. At this point, it just didn't matter as long as...

Please, I don't want him to die. No matter what, I don't want him to die.

With thoughts like these, it was easy to erect a kekkai, removing everything around them from the world so that there would be no real damage. The star shaped barrier spread outward, removing the two of them from everyone else, separating them from the world entirely.

"I knew I would not be disappointed," Seishirou murmured, even as he began a spell of his own. The landscape around them changed, and instead of standing on a bridge they were in a park. The Tree was an overwhelming presence, the fullness of the evil aura staggering Subaru with almost physical force.

"I don't think it likes me very much, Seishirou-san." Subaru shuddered, wrapping his arms around himself. He could not keep out the vision he'd had of Hokuto's death. This right here was where she'd died, in Seishirou's arms, by his hand.

"You're wrong. It likes you very much, Subaru. Perhaps too much," Seishirou mused, a half smile dancing on his lips. "It thinks you would be tasty. I wonder if it is right." He bent closer to Subaru, his eyes suggesting a meaning to the word that Subaru was just starting to grasp.

Subaru blushed a bright pink, matching the blossoms that dripped delicate petals all around them. "Seishirou-san!"

Whatever else he might have said was cut off by a kiss, a caress, more and more, and finally Seishirou said, "Let me taste you," and Subaru leaned back and opened himself to all sorts of new possibilities.

"No! No more illusions, no more lies!" Subaru tore through the illusion violently, terrified of being pinned, knowing that if he held still Seishirou would invoke Hokuto's final spell. "Seishirou-san!"

"You still don't want to kill me, Subaru? You're still as kind as ever." Seishirou sent his shikigami flying toward Subaru's face, making Subaru jump to avoid it.

"No! That is the last thing I want!" But, in the time it took Subaru to dodge, Seishirou had disappeared. Where was he? More precious seconds were wasted, searching, before he felt Seishirou's aura flare behind him. He barely dodged, feeling the tingle of magic brush against his back, feeling fingertips like razors cut into his skin. He must be desperate to hit from behind, Subaru thought.

He dropped like a rock to the ground and rolled, then flew into the air with a handful of ofuda between thumb and forefinger. Not much damage was being done to the surroundings, but this fight wasn't about destruction really. It was about Seishirou's survival.

"After all I've done to you, you still can't bring yourself to want my death?"

"I love you!" Subaru cried in response.

"Subaru, your memories were erased because it was my wish as well. I wanted you to only remember how much you wanted to kill me."

"I don't want to live without you either!"

Seishirou froze.

"I'll never be able to." Subaru slumped in defeat, almost crying as he watched the broken and bloodied form collapsed on the carpet. He should just let Seishirou die, here and now. It would be easier to just crawl back to his grandmother right now and call the police in a few hours...maybe tomorrow....

"I'll never be able to let you go."

He punched numbers on the phone, not caring that he was smearing blood across the handle and the buttons. His voice was strangely steady as he ordered an ambulance to his apartment, assuring them that this was a dire emergency. "I thought he was a burglar, and attacked in the dark. Please hurry."

At this point he didn't care if anyone believed him. He turned off the phone and slid to the floor and cried. "Don't die, Seishirou-san...please, not like this...."

"Su...ba...ru...ku...n...." the pain was clearly too much, but Seishirou was smiling. "This...I want...this...."

"Shhh, don't talk. It will be okay."

But, Seishirou wasn't looking or listening to anything in the real world. So, Subaru did what he could to stop the bleeding and make the older man more comfortable. "Why?" he whispered, brushing hair from Seishirou's face. "It's as if you wanted to die."

Subaru fell to his knees. "I can not do what you want. I can not be who you want me to be. Please, Seishirou-san. Don't do this."

Seishirou knelt before Subaru and bent close to his ear as if imparting a secret. "It has been destined...only one of us will walk away. If you stay there, it will only hasten the inevitable."

Subaru jumped to his feet even as Seishirou poised himself to strike. It was close for a moment, but Subaru managed again to dodge...to sacrifice himself a little bit to save Seishirou's life. This time it was his left shoulder, getting torn into by the magic.

He winced and clutched the wound even as he leapt away from another attack. This wouldn't do. He could not live without Seishirou. He could not let this happen.

He felt he had no other option open to him.

Subaru began a full out offensive, hurling raw magical energy that he knew Seishirou would easily dodge. It was just another aspect of the game they were locked in. Just another distraction. He winced at the damage being done because, if he was successful, it would be revisited in the real world. Maybe even if he failed...either way, he would no longer be in a position to protect the things of this world.

"If I were to kill you in the manner I had killed her, I would die and you would survive. The same would happen if you tried to kill me."

Subaru lunged forward.

He knew the spell...and detested it, having sworn he'd never use it. He had to be just as versed in the darker spells as he was with the light though, but he would never, could never, had never dared use any of it--

--until now.

The energy was like a lance, forcing everything before his cupped hand to part before his fingers. They were both in motion, but Subaru was faster. Despite the magical force that preceded his hand, he felt the crunch of bone and the tearing of flesh and heat of fresh flowing blood. He expected to feel the impossible crushing pain visited upon himself...

...any moment now...

...what's taking so long?

"NO!"

Subaru stared in horror, pulling his hand away, unable to see anything but the gaping hole in Seishirou's chest and the flow of red that seemed to be everywhere....

"What about Hokuto's spell? Seishirou-san! This shouldn't happen! Seishirou-san!"

"I lied," Seishirou said, leaning heavily against Subaru. "I've lied about a great many things."

Tears fell from Subaru's eyes even as Seishirou smiled. Subaru was falling in what felt like slow motion to his knees, supporting his lover and his only love, shock settling through him. He felt the presence of the others gathering around him, and he wondered how long they'd been there.

Kamui rushed forward while the others held back. "Subaru!" But, to Subaru it seemed like his voice came from a great distance. It wasn't until he felt Kamui's hand on his shoulder, shaking him, and saw the surprised look in Seishirou's eyes that Subaru realized the teenager had said anything else.

"What?"

"I said, you missed. Hurry up, we have to get him to the hospital!"

"I--" He looked at the wound again and his brow furrowed in confusion.

"Come on! It doesn't matter who he is, we have to hurry!"

But, now Seishirou had something more to say, even as Subaru gathered his lover in his arms. "You...would rather die than kill me," he said, even as his eyes dimmed with pain. Seishirou would lose consciousness soon.

"Of course! I love you, Seishirou-san. No matter what. Don't ever do something like this again!"

Seishirou slumped weakly. "I'll try."

It was a chance. It was hope. Subaru decided he'd do whatever it took, say whatever he could, anything in the world to keep Seishirou by his side.

It was finally a start.

So, this brings me to the end of another fanfic, and one that pulled me in further than any fanfic I've written before. It shares a space with "Wish Unspoken, Dream Unbroken" as one of two fics that actually made me *cry* as I was writing it. And, as WUDU is my most successful CCS fanfic to date, I think this story is in good company.

I am actually satisfied.

I know I would have written this with or without the support of everyone who told me what they thought of this fic, but I'm not sure it would have been the same. I owe a deep debt of gratitude to all who took the time to comment, in some form or another. You all drove me to write this well instead of just fast. Thank you, one and all, from the bottom of my toes. (From the bottom of my heart is just not deep enough!)

List of thanks:

from CLAMPesque

Etrangere, GrayMM, Toruko, Elihice, KageTsuki, Asha, Agent420, ArissTenoh, Hangedman, GreyLily, ky-lin, Dreamfire, SilentSeraphim, Asha, Brie, hyperkaoru, purplecoloredgeek, Miri, Milly, Kamitra, and all the anonymous people who did not sign a name at all.

from ff.net:

chamberlain, Larania Drake, Dove, brokenAngelYue, sakuralight sl-sama, Cygna-hime, baka deshi, Konnie-chan, Dany, Ghost Whisper, Kreshnya, Insane Onna, ying87, Agent420, Monou Hakkai, Hikari-neko, Silent Seraphim, Jaelle, Cherry-Wolf, Plastraa, Liviania, Sina, Dark Ice Angel, Tara, Subaru's Voice, "^__^", Saku-Kitsune, HellFenix, Sakurakumagorou, littlefreeze, The Infamous Shiro Kitsune, Someone, MusigMistress, flibbertigibbet, Sakurazuka-chan, shinzona, and Zora.

And, a few people only let me know over IM that they were following my story, and I'd like to let them know they are appreciated as well. I didn't keep track of who did, but know that if you IMed me about this story I *DO* appreciate talking to you. ~hugs~ It kept me on track, knowing that people appreciated this story so much.

I can't believe it's over.