Trigun Fan Fiction ❯ After The End of All ❯ Part 7 ( Chapter 7 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Disclaimer: Not. Mine. (yaaaawn…)

Spoilers: Trigun Maximum, Vol 6, ch 4. Just a bit of an exchange between Knives and someone…

Beta: Alaena Night, you deserve the title of the best beta in the world!! XD (glomps and cuddles Alaena-san) …. Thought, I’m very sorry for not contacting you for so long… Could you still accept me..? (peers at Alaena-san with glistening puppy eyes)

A/N: This episode starts three months after Part 6.

A/N(2): I’m sooooooooooooooooo sorry with the late update. I’ve given my warning of the fact that I’m a slow writer in my profile, but MAN I never thought I’d taken this long a time to write! The life as a university student gets more hectic by the time you progress into a new semester. Not helping is the fact that I’ve got major tests and exams almost every month, with all the labs and assignments and reports… not to mention that I’m getting more involved with my collage’s activities. Soooo tired… TvT

Well, to make due to all my readers out there, I’ll be posting this fic at a faster rate. I’ve almost finished with this little baby, as I’m already done the next few chappies, which are just going through some proofing. Only one chapter left for me to do, and that’s it! Then I can start with another series of that has been stuck in my head for the longest time! Yay! XD

(Knives is poking the author on her side.) “Oi, oi. Didn’t ya already started with that, like, four months ago? If I’m not mistaken, you already have two chapters written down and a third one in suit, finishing at the middle of last night? When you barely even done with the two assignments you were supposed to hand in the week before?”

(The author sweatdrops as the readers are beginning to stare at her suspiciously.)

(Vash – appearing out of nowhere, just like his brother…– cheerfully injects,) “Oh, not to forget that oneshot you wrote a couple of months back, which you took your time editing? You know, about Wolfwood and me fuc–MUMPHS?”

(The author promptly glues her hands on Vash’s mouth, her apprehension mounting as the Knives joins in the darkly glowering readers. Knives is smiling sickly sweet, which is scaring the hell and earth out of the already trembling author.)

“Oh, really? Care to explain what MY Vashu was talking about, dear author?”

(And seeing the glimpse of Angle Blades forming on Knives’ arm, the author makes the wisest decision ever: She runs, as if her life depends on it. Hell, her life does depend on not letting those elongated knifes slice through her!) (As the author scampers away, Knives swiftly takes hold on his brother, hugging him by the neck, and mumbling to himself about stupid authors will be getting what she deserves later. Vash sweatdrops as he substitutes the author by saying,)

“Ah… Enjoy your reading..?”


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After The End of All
Part 7
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The dark speck in my hair has expanded.

“That color is… the blackness of decay.”

I gazed blankly into my reflection in bathroom mirror. More of my silver blond spikes have turned to black…

If Chronica hadn’t told me, I would have never noticed.


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(FIFTEEN HOURS AGO)


“…Say what?”

Grasping to any godly hold onto my body, quelling the immediate urge to find the nearest reflective object in the vicinity, I gawked point-blank at Chronica.

“You have more dark hair now than it was the time you were released.”

My outward demeanor mayhave beenrelaxed, but my heart was pounding erratically. I clenched onto the cold armrest of my chair. In these hectic three months of energy transferring and research, I had totally forgotten about my condition…

“It is an unavoidable side effect of using your power even beyond your limit. Independents may utilize their power freely, but if they have passed their boundaries, continuous output will cause degeneration of tissues and internal organs, which will inevitably lead to total breakdown of the bodily activities…”

And death.

Just like Vash.

Chronica was purposely averting her eyes from mine, currently looking into a travel log in her hands.

She knew.

She knew that as I tried to save my brother, itwould also result in me slowly killing myself. And she never intended to tell me this earlier, before the treatment begun. But since Ihad come this far in reviving my brother, Icould notstep back anymore…

I whirled my chair back to face the numerous monitors, continuing with deciphering Vash’s neuroimage and sensorimotor rhythm waves.

“It’s not imperative toVash's recuperation, thus it is not important. Please avoid from bringing up this matter again.”

I cannot let her see, nor feel my present state of distress. My pride will never tolerate any demeaning actions in front of anyone. Even her.

That particular issuehad absolutely slipped my mind as I was rushing to find methods on how to efficiently heal Vash to the point where he would no longer need that awful cylinder vessel he’s in right now. With the energy transfer becoming more frequent by the weeks, I have little free time between my sessions with Vash, my indispensable sleep and research. Much less for grooming.

Chronica sensed something was amiss, but didn’t say a word to me since. I had truly appreciated the solitude.


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I ran my hair through the short locks of my hair, ruffling it in a childish attempt to somehow make the dark spikes disappear amongst the silver white ones. Knowing that it didn’t make any sense and was just a waste of time, but I didn’t resist the temptations.

I was already dying. Why should I restrict myself from doing what I want to, when I want to?

…ah yes. Time. Time is precious. With these constant energy transmissions, it’s no wonder that my body has taken its toll as well. The reason on why I cointegrated with my sisters was because I no longer had the unlimited capability to use my powers after that event in Nouve drained me beyond my threshold. If I were to burn up my powers with this current rate, I may as well make my own grave on this ship.

… wait. This ship is my grave, and my coffin is already prepared for me. I had previously spent a good deal of my time in that casket.

I snorted humorlessly. Yes. Timewas very important. Icould notwaste what valuable time Ihad left.

Vashneeded me.


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“Why are you so sad, brother?”

Vash hazily gazed at me, looking at me with imploring emerald eyes.

“You’re only imagining things,” was my immediate reply.

We were sitting on one of the red dunes in Vash’s make-believe Eden. To be exact, I was the only one sitting. Vash was inclined to lying on his back, happily observing the cloudless skies. With that constant empty smile etched onto his face…

I dragged my eyes from his; a nagging of de-ja-vu was poking me in the head.

I was sure that any physical changes to mewould also be brought into these sacred grounds, as Vash has once cheerfully pointed out that some of my hair was black and asked why I dyed it that way; which I answered with a shrug, a pat on his head, and a ‘just because’. Thus, I deliberately sat to his left, in a futile effort to cover my blackening hair from his sight. Ithad spread to almost one-fifth the expanse of my hair. And I believe I just added some more with today’s session.

I have yet to tell him. Of his present situation, of his past, of his present, of me; of anything. If he were to go into shock from mental overload, he may suffer a relapse; which would have a dire consequence on his body and revert all my efforts of healing him until now. Vash's physical condition was progressing very well, and the temperature of his chambershad been raised gradually until only chills were felt as I stepped into it earlier today. Chronica and I have agreed that we’ll wait until Vash no longer needs the Gouhfon’s bio-stabilizer to keep alive, and then tell him the truth. But Vash and I have talked a little about our childhood times. I was taken aback when he suddenly recalled us spending time in a place filled with greenery and the sky was also blue, playing around the big tree at the middle of it, exploring the mysterious world of the gardens. He even remembered the very first few words he learned to read: once upon a time. (*)

Apparently Vash retained the happy memories of us when we were only children; when we were so naïve, so gullible…

But for some reason, any indications of memories regarding Rem were still suppressed. My best guess was he wasn’t ready to face the truth.

Whenever I met Vash in this false heaven, I engaged myself into make idle talks with Vash or walk around the unchanging scenery with him or just sit around, silently taking pleasure in just being there with my dear brother…

“Please don’t lie to me.”

“……”

I veered my head to my right. Vash was sitting upright beside me, crossing his arms on his raised knees, hunching as he rested his chin between his forearms. He apparently was looking straight to his front, at the endless blue horizons.

…Is that a frown I see?

If my memory hadn’t failed me, this was the first time Vash had made any expression that wasn’t cheerful or playful-like ever since I met him in this peaceful pseudo-paradise.

“You know, you’re very bad at lying. Ever since we were little, you can’t keep a straight face or look at me when you lied to me. And you’re doing the same thing now.”

Vash turned his head a little, just enough for his green orbs to peer at me with his face still partly buried in his arms. His beseeching gaze was my undoing.

Icould notpull my eyes away from those aqua depths. The eyeswere glowing; gleaming of knowledge, of comprehension, of understanding.

Of hurt.

Because I was being untruthful to him, Vash comprehended that I was keeping something from him. Since he thought I didn’t put much trust in him as a brother, he responded with being sad.

I was just as ecstatic as I was upset.

Vash being hurt meant that some of his feelingshad come back. Understanding one’s feeling require recollections of that person’s past. Which meant that hedid remember being hurt, and thatindicated his memories slowly coming back and improving, with his emotions in tow.

This is a good thing, right?

On the other hand, it’ll be much harder to keep a secret from him. One of these days, I’ll be forced to tell him the truth. And the truth is not always good for the faint-hearted. I am sure that Vash is much stronger than that I’m currently taking him for granted, but I cannot risk his health with his already precarious well being.

My reply was slow but stern, “Forgive me, Vashu. I have much in my mind that I cannot reveal to you, yet. But in time, I’ll tell you all about it. Don’t worry yourself about troublesome issues. When the time comes, I’ll show you the whole truth. I promise you that.”

Vash wasn’t satisfied with my response, if that discontented pout he was giving me was any indication of it. Then he did the most childish act ever, since last month’s lets-make-a-huge-red-flower-ball thingamabob.

“Pinky swear.”

Wholly amused, and feeling much more at ease, I connected my right pinky with his offered left one. I pulled the linked fingers nearer, and pressed my lips onto them; kissing them. Vash followed suit. When we were little children, this was our extended version of pinky-swearing, making our promise much more important to keep.

Well, better entertain him than seeing him sad.

He grinned at me; an honest smile straight from his broken heart. And I grinned back.

How I have missedthese dulcet interactions with my brother…

The usual pat on my shoulder snapped me out of my elated reverie. It was time for me to leave Vash; again…

Vash, being perspective as ever every time I had to take my leave, said the customary farewell: “Will you come again?”

Vash was still smiling, but his lips were wavering in a hidden woe. No matter how many times I had come and go, how my time here has extended from mere five minutes to almost an hour in one session, he was still unsure…

I steadily rose to my knees, and kissed him softly on his smooth forehead. That, and a smile, was the only reassurance he ever needed.

A whispered ‘thank you’ rang through my ears as I left him alone in the vast plane of geraniums…


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I absent-mindedly picked at the white sheet of my pillow. (**)

For the last two months, I made it a habit to go straight to bed after every energy transfer. Usually as my head hit the pillow,I'd be snoring away, dead to the world for at least five hours. Then I would wake up refreshed and ready for hours of endless, and most of the time fruitless, research for Vash’s cure. Butthat time, Ihad been rolling around my bed for the past twenty minutes, and still Icould notsleep a wink.

My mind was haunted with the possibility that I may not be able to absolutely heal Vash with only my powers. I may have enough energy until he was restored to health enough for him to return to awareness from his coma. But with his hair completely turned to black, hewould need a continual source of energy flow to keep him alive. His Gate will not be stable enough even after all these treatment. I’ve delved into every means possible, but none other than me has a flow that synchronizes with his. Thus, I am his only hope at living… I couldn’t die before him. I mustn’t die before him. He needs me; now more than ever…

This sense of hopelessness and incompetence gnawed into my soul. Just like when I received my first strands of black hair.

Just like when Elendria revealed to me that Vash was suffering the same fate as I was; of gradually degrading into a being lesser than those spiders…

I didn’tenvision that Vash could be dying as a result of my activating his Angel Arm. Everything… everything was going as planned. As it should be. But Conrad just had to keep that one crucial information from me…


“Looks like your hair has begun to darken. It’s downhill from here, Knives”

“What do you mean…?”

“You’ve exhausted your maximum capabilities, your decline as an organism has begun. Just like her. If you continue to use this power, all of your hair will turn to black… and you body will break down completely. In other words, you will die.”

“You predicted this… Damn you, Conrad!!”

“If I hadn’t, how would I have been able to stop it? This is the only option for a lowly human like me.”


Yes, that was low. Even for him. But the selfish humans will go to any extent to keep themselves safe and well-protected, with an emergency back-exit.

To think that I had put so much trust in him… I assumed that he was one of the ‘good guys’ in those old western movie flicks I watched with Vash way back in the SEEDs days. To put my faith in the doctor to get rid of my sickness was the right thing to do, I thought to myself. But, again, my conviction to a spider went against me. I should have known that he’d keep something that important from me up his sleeves…

I should have never trusted a human. They have yet to show that anything good will come to their alliance with Plants. Yes, they have managed to save Vash from crossing the doors of death before. But just because they were the cause of his current misery, the pests felt they were obligated to do so. They have yet to learn from their lessons…

I tightened my grip onto the pasty-colored fabric.

Without the whole information, I had made a huge glitch in my strategy. Vash was supposed to return to my side, not to die because of it. Conrad was at fault… he didn’t tell me about the darkening of the hair was the indication of a Plant’s death…

I’ve killed him. You’d be happy to know that the one at fault for making you go through all this died by your brother’s hands. Won’t you, Vash?

I coughed out a hollow chuckle.

Yes… yes, you would.

They are incapable of rescuing you. But I can. And I will. I will resuscitate you from your endless dreams, and bring you to a better world…

I closed my eyes; as if the weights that kept them open all this time had finally been lifted off of me, enabling me to get my much-needed rest. I curled into a tight ball, drawing my coverlet tighter; enveloping me like a warm hug would… lulling myself to sleep with the hopes of a future with my dear brother…

A better future for both of us…


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TURN TO THE NEXT EPISODE.
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A/N:

(*) I quoted this from a fanfic titled ‘Eaten Away’ by Tomo Trilions. I have somehow fallen in love with the dark fic. Especially the ending. Such a sweet ending for one godamned horror story. U’huh. (nods to self)

(**) And adopted this little one from ‘Love and Reproduction’ by Yma. This is also one hell of a dark and gloomy fic. Not for the lily-livered or the prejudiced, mind you. One of the few that I love very, VERY much. (It’s even in my Fav Stories list! Yay! XD) At one scene, Yma portrayed Knives sitting on his bed, as he “plucks idly at the starched white sheet of his bed”. That’s really cute for a sociopathic Plant when you think of it. XD