Trigun Fan Fiction ❯ Not Quite Worthless ❯ Chapter 11

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

 

Yes…I'm back from the abyss.  Arafel, as always, I appreciate your mad beta skillz.

 

Thanks for your patience, everyone.  I hope you enjoy.

 

 

 

Chapter 11

 

Knives walked through the door of the small house, faint irritation crossing his face at the sight of the disorder caused by the move.  The house wasn't that messy, but thinking about what his brother was doing right now was enough to make him edgier than usual.

 

Millie looked up from her seat on the couch.  "Hello, Knives!  How was the trip?"

 

Against his will, he felt less irritated at her obvious pleasure to see him.  "Fine."

 

"Did you manage to find a radio?" she asked, wrapping a dinner plate before placing it in a box.

 

"I did."  He sat across from her in an empty chair.

 

"Good.  When we get moved in, you can set it up in your room and listen to it whenever you want."  She smiled, then looked puzzled.  "Where's your brother?"

 

Knives' face soured, and comprehension dawned.  "Oh," she murmured, "He must have wanted some time alone with Meryl."  She smiled.  "Good for them.  They haven't had a chance to be alone for a while."

 

Knives did not answer, but the dark look on his face was response enough.

 

The reason behind his irritation was easy to guess, and she decided to drop the subject.  Instead, she asked, "Have I ever told you about my family, Knives?"

 

He looked at her warily, not sure where she was going with this, and not sure he could take another one of her insights.

 

But there was no jarring, gut-wrenching epiphany this time, only Millie relating stories of growing up in her large family while he helped pack up the last of their things. 

 

She spoke of all nine siblings with equal affection, as well as her parents and an endless supply of extended family.  Once he relaxed, he failed to realize that he was taking in the lessons of life and family love along with Millie's innocent chatter. 

 

<><><>

 

Meryl stirred.  She couldn't remember feeling this warm and relaxed in…well, ever.  For once, she wasn't worried about anything.  Half asleep, she stretched, purring at the pleasant languor weighting her limbs.  An answering rumble vibrated through her cheek, shaking her further awake.

 

She frowned.  Had her pillow always been so comfortable?  The rumble sharpened into a masculine laugh.  A very satisfied masculine laugh.

 

"Even dozing, you think loudly," Vash murmured, brushing a few strands of hair off Meryl's forehead.  "Get up, sweetheart, I know you can hear me."

 

Meryl gave an unladylike grunt. 

 

"Come on, I don't want to leave either. Millie and Knives must be waiting for us.  I don't feel right leaving them alone much longer."

 

At the mention of Knives, Meryl's sleepiness and goodwill evaporated.

 

"Knives?" she barked, shooting up with a scowl.  Her eyes flew to Vash's face and she felt herself turn bright red.

 

Vash lounged on the mattress, supporting his head with one arm.  He wore nothing but a twisted sheet and a grin.   

 

Suddenly shy, Meryl cast her eyes around in an effort not to stare.  To her surprise, she was lying on a mattress on the kitchen floor.  She frowned in puzzlement, then relaxed.  

 

She did vaguely remember hearing some noise that had woken her up at some point. At her questioning noise, Vash had murmured something reassuring and lifted her into his arms for a moment.   As soon as she felt his arms around her, she had immediately gone back to sleep.  As much as she shouted at him for his idiot act, she knew he would wake her if there were any real need. 

 

And after her afternoon, she hadn't wanted to be woken up for anything less than more of what had put her to sleep in the first place.

 

Vash seemed to understand how nervous she was, and he ran his good hand up and down her back.  To her surprise, the touch soothed her enough so that she was able to turn towards him again, peeking up at his face and holding the sheet like a lifeline.

 

"Hi," she said.  It seemed the only thing she was capable of saying.

 

"Hi," he responded, his grin softening into a gentler expression.  "Figures you'd be more interested in beating up my brother than staying with me."

 

Meryl frowned, opening her mouth for another of her usual "Vash, don't be an idiot," speeches, but a certain strain around his mouth and eyes stopped her.  He was hiding behind that joking exterior again, although it was more subdued than usual.

 

He was scared.  Vash the Stampede, the man who had faced down the worst examples of humanity and faced persecution for decades, was afraid of what she would say.

 

She supposed she couldn't blame him.  It couldn't have been easy to allow someone past all his barriers after all these years.   But you'd think he'd get a clue…

 

Meryl reached out and cupped his cheek in one hand.  The tiny lines in his face smoothed away and his eyes brightened.  She lifted her face to his and began planting small kisses along the line of his jaw.

 

"As much fun as it would be to beat your brother senseless, I'd rather stay with you."

 

"I'm a lucky guy," he responded, winding an arm around her waist.  "Especially since I know how much you want to kick his ass."

 

Meryl nuzzled his neck.  "How long have we been here?"

 

"A few hours," Vash replied. 

 

"I'm sorry you had to bring the mattress in all by yourself." 

 

"Don't worry about it.  Besides, you didn't think I'd let someone else see you like this, do you?"  He slid a hand up from her waist and tweaked her nipple.

 

Meryl gave his hand a token slap, but couldn't keep the smile from her face.  She leaned against his side and sighed with contentment.

 

There was no way she could have seen herself in this position three years ago.  Even after she admitted her feelings for him, she didn't believe they would ever be returned. 

 

"Vash…I…I…"  It was ironic.  Now that she knew he returned her feelings, she didn't seem to be able to voice everything she'd been holding in all this time.

 

Vash tipped her face and kissed her.  He pulled back to give her one of his true smiles, one that made his eyes shine and showed how at peace he truly felt.

 

"It's all right.  You don't have to say it.  You've proved how you feel in so many different ways."  Vash looked wistful.  "You've stayed with me through so much, and it got harder to leave you every time.  If it was hard before, I don't think I could ever do it now."

 

She scowled.  "You better not even try, mister," she muttered.  "Not after this."

 

"Don't worry.  I already know you'll follow me into just about anything anyway."

 

Meryl was silent for a moment.  "Millie and I were in Augusta, you know."

 

Vash drew in a sharp breath, and he looked down at her, stricken.

 

"After Augusta, I knew I that if I ever found you again, I'd stay.  That hasn't changed."

 

"You…" he began.  "Anyone else would see that as the best reason in the world to get away from me."  Then, so softly she wasn't even sure she heard him, "You really want to stay, don't you?"

 

"What?"

 

 "Oh, what a joyous day!" he shouted.  "The woman I love loves me back!" Pretending to bawl loudly, he dove face-first on the mattress, grabbed Meryl around the waist and rubbed his face against her stomach.

 

"Vash!" she yelled.  "What the hell are you doing?  Stop that right now!"

 

"But honey, I'm just so haaaaappy!"

 

"Oh, stop it."  Meryl stifled an enormous grin and pushed at the arms encircling her.  "Let me up."

 

The wailing stopped, and Vash sat up to watch her put her clothes back on.  "Do you have to get dressed?"

 

"You said it yourself, we still have things to do.  I want to make sure Millie's okay.  I did leave her a few hours ago."

 

Vash gave a heavy sigh, but he reached for his clothes.  "You're right.  And I did want to get this stuff inside and bring the truck back before it gets dark."

 

Meryl rose gingerly from the floor, wincing as her muscles protested after their recent activity.  Vash watched her and frowned.

 

"I should have waited," he murmured.

 

"Waited for what?  For Knives to interrupt again?  Or for Millie to go into labor?" Meryl raised an eyebrow.  "We've both wanted this for a while.  I'm not hurt.  I'll be fine."

 

Vash smiled back, but the shadows weren't gone from his eyes.  Meryl sighed to herself.  His soft heart was one of the reasons why she loved him so much, but it sure didn't cut him any slack.

 

"Come on, Humanoid Typhoon.  Let's get going," Meryl said briskly.  Maybe if she put him to work, he wouldn't have a chance to brood.

 

<><><>

 

Upon their return to the house, Millie gave them a knowing smile along with her warm welcome back.  Knives gave them a flat stare, and abandoned the box he had been packing.

 

"Now that you're back, brother, you can be of some use instead of leaving all of the work to others," he said coldly before leaving the room.

 

Vash frowned, but to Meryl's surprise, didn't follow Knives from the room.  Meryl quirked an eyebrow by way of a question, but all he said was,  "He needs to get used to us eventually.  He's not a child."  Shrugging off Knives' disdain, Vash walked across the kitchen and started to root through the refrigerator.

 

Meryl wholeheartedly agreed.  If they were to have any kind of real relationship, they couldn't dance around Knives and his hurt feelings.  And yet…

 

"Vash," Meryl sighed, "maybe you should go and speak to him."

 

Vash turned from the fridge with a donut in his mouth and a question in his eyes.

 

Millie chimed in, "Yeah, we'll be fine, Vash.  You really should talk to him.  He's only dealt well with all these new things because you've been so patient with him."

 

Meryl made a frustrated noise, reminded by Vash's half-eaten snack.  "Damn it, I left all the food at the other house!"

 

"There was food?"  Vash said, swallowing his donut.

 

"Yeah, I bought it before you guys got back.  I'll run and get it.  Go on and talk to Knives, and I can have the food back in no time.  I'm sure he's as hungry as you are by now."

 

Vash nodded.  "All right.  Hopefully we'll have enough time to empty the truck before it gets dark."

 

"We'll be fine, Vash," Millie said.  "Now go on after your brother. I'll stay here and finish up packing while Meryl gets the food."

 

Vash gave a half-hearted grin and followed his brother out of the room.  He could sense that Knives was out on the back porch, which didn't surprise him.  It had quickly become the other plant's favorite place to brood.

 

He opened the back door.  As he expected, his brother stood a few yards from the porch steps, seemingly lost in thought.  Vash knew better.

 

Stifling a sigh, he sat on the top step and waited for his brother to speak.

 

:Why did you even bother to come back?  You've got all you want without me.:

 

Vash sighed. :Do you honestly believe that?:

 

:I would not say it otherwise.:

 

Vash sighed.  He had been trying to convince his brother over and over that he wanted Knives to be a part of his life, but Knives seemed determined not to believe it.

 

He could open his mind to his brother, but hesitated due to all the painful baggage between them.  Who knew what Knives would do with the information?

 

:Knives.  If I allow you in, you have to do the same.  After this, there won't be much hidden between us.:

 

Knives turned his head sharply, eyes impossibly wide.  Whatever he had been expecting from his brother, it wasn't this.

 

:You would…allow this?:

 

:I wouldn't say it otherwise.:

 

Knives held himself stiffly, tensely.  To Vash's eyes he looked incredibly brittle, as if one more upset would shatter him completely.  :You promise me?  It will be as it was when we were children?:

 

Vash shook his head and approached his brother.  :We can't go back, Knives.  I'm not the same person I was as a child.  But I'm your brother and I still love you.:

 

Knives was silent.  Vash waited for his brother to mull over his offer.

 

He turned away from his brother's indecision and regarded the town.  It was beginning to boom since the discovery of the well, and pride welled up in him for his part in helping the people of Sweetwater improve their lives.

 

Homesteads were springing up further from the center of town as more people tapped into the new water vein.  Irrigation canals made it more feasible for people to spread out, relieving some of the congestion caused by only having one central water source.

 

:Fine.:  Knives said, abruptly.

 

Vash looked up and steeled himself.  He hoped this was the right thing to do.

 

<><><>

 

Meryl swore under her breath.  Bringing the food back had taken her longer than she planned. 

 

Once she got back to the house, she was greeted by the mattress lying on the floor of the kitchen, reminding her of its recent use. 

 

"I can't let Knives and Millie see this," she muttered, red-faced.  Millie and Knives already had a good idea of what she and Vash had been doing that afternoon.  The mattress confirmed it, and she hurried to make her activities less obvious.

 

She wrestled it into another room, no small feat given her small stature and the bulkiness of the mattress.  Then, the sheets needed to be folded and put somewhere to be washed.  By the time she packed the food, she had been gone almost an hour and the suns were starting to cast long shadows on the kitchen floor.

 

"Oh, they must be starving.  I'd better hurry," she said to herself.

 

Hefting the paper sack in her arms, she started to make her way back to the old house.  Hopefully the twins had made up by now, but knowing how pissy Knives tended to be, she doubted it.

 

How on earth anyone could be so immature after living more than a century was beyond her.  She couldn't pretend to understand what Knives had been through, but his behavior struck her as self-indulgent and irresponsible.

 

This is the man who tried to destroy an entire species, and spared no method to bring his brother around to his way of thinking.  Restraint was not part of his makeup.

 

To be fair, he hasn't caused nearly as much trouble as he could have since Vash returned, Meryl mused.

 

She smiled to herself as the house came into view.  In truth, Knives had been much less trouble than she had anticipated.  Maybe she should give him the benefit of the doubt. 

 

Shifting the weight of the paper sack to one arm, she pulled the front door open.  "I'm home," she called out.

 

No one answered.  She set the bag down on the table and peeked through the doorway to the living room.  Millie sat in one of the chairs, dead to the world.  She snored softly even as her hand unconsciously rubbed her belly.

 

Meryl smiled and backed into the kitchen.  She arranged the food, careful not to disturb Milly with the noise.   The sandwiches and desserts would keep out on the table.  The drinks went in the fridge.   

 

She was setting out plates and glasses for the twins when the back door banged open.

 

Meryl jumped and hissed, "Millie's sleeping!  Keep it…down…" The admonishment was automatic but when she turned to face the door, the blood drained from her face.

 

Knives' face was a mix of anguish, rage and horror.  She didn't think he had heard a word she said.

 

Behind him, Vash sat on the steps; his back slumped in apparent misery. 

 

Meryl took a step away from Knives, thinking to leave him to his tantrum.  But the movement attracted his attention, and she flinched at the horrible gaze he turned on her.

 

"You."  The word was filled with loathing. 

 

Vash jumped to his feet and she began to back away. 

 

"Kn-Knives?  Knives, what…?"  Meryl faltered.

 

"Stop it, Knives," Vash said tightly as he entered the kitchen.  "You got what you wanted, isn't that enough?"

 

Knives ignored his brother.  "You are inferior.  How is it that you have gained such a place in his heart?" 

 

"Dammit, Knives, leave her alone!"  Vash shouted.  He stood behind his brother, within arm's reach if Knives made another move.

 

Sweat gathered on the palms of her hands, and she took a deep breath to steady herself. 

 

Bewilderment crept through the rage on Knives' face.  "In his mind, you are comfort and strength and understanding.  You are support and friendship and trust.  These far outweigh any negative emotions."  His voice grew louder and more anguished.

 

"I am pain and sorrow and fear.  I am persecution and weight and resentment.  His love for me bears this load with such agony."  His eyes grew wild.

 

"Knives…" Meryl couldn't think of anything to say. 

 

He hissed, "I don't need your pity, human."

 

Meryl narrowed her eyes as her brief moment of sympathy was swallowed in the wave of resentment washing over her. 

 

Compassionate Meryl was fighting Meryl the Bitch, and the Bitch was winning.

 

"Knives, that's enough!" Vash grabbed his brother's arm.  "Stop this, now!"

 

Meryl felt the very air around her become heavy, as if Knives' anger were too much for the room to bear.  As he tried to yank his arm from Vash's grasp, she took an involuntary step forward.

 

"Stay back, Meryl!  Please!" Vash ordered.

 

She stopped, and her heart wrenched, remembering the first time he said those same words to her. 

 

"Go get Millie and get out of the house," Vash told her.  "I can handle this."

 

Meryl nodded.  Vash sounded so weary and hurt.  Trying to handle his brother without hurting anyone was at the root of all of his problems.

 

Fueled by protective anger, Meryl the Bitch stomped Compassionate Meryl into the ground.

 

"Dammit, Knives," she burst out.  "You're so judgmental of everyone but yourself!  Don't you get it yet?  No one made you hurt him; you decided that all on your own! How he sees you is your own fault!

 

"No one made you chase him!  No one made you assemble a team of assassins and send them after him!  No one made you shoot off his arm!

 

"He's your brother!  If you love him so damn much, how about letting him live in peace?"

 

Knives froze, then broke Vash's hold on him and lunged forward.  Meryl could only watch, frozen, as his furious face came closer. 

 

The next thing she knew, she had been flung to the side, hitting the wall hard enough to startle, but not hard enough to hurt.  She could hear the sound of Knives' boots thundering out of the house and down the front stairs.

 

The Bitch saw that her job was done and retreated.  Confused Meryl was the only one left. 

 

What the hell had just happened?