Trigun Fan Fiction ❯ The Resurrection Of Nicholas D. Wolfwood ❯ Old Friends, Old Problems ( Chapter 4 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

The Resurrection Of Nicholas D. Wolfwood

Part Four: Old Friends, Old Problems

By Bekka Mouri

(I don't own Trigun and I am making no money off of this please don't sue me. This chapter is a long one and full of spoilers.)

Wolfwood found the town's post office and stopped the Angelina in front of it. He dismounted and grabbed the cross, looking around to see if anyone was staring. A couple of people glanced at him but not for long. Everyone seemed a little more relaxed now that Vash had supposedly vanished.

~Only if they had known the truth about him, they wouldn't have been so scared of him, ~ Wolfwood thought and climbed the steps. He took of his sunglasses and tucked them away before walking over to the postmaster's desk. He cleared his throat and said, " Excuse me. "

The man looked up, " Can I help you? "

" Uh, yeah. I need the address for the main office of The Bernardelli Insurance Society, " Wolfwood said.

" You need an insurance policy? " The postmaster responded.

" You could say that, " Wolfwood smiled. ~I need an insurance girl. ~

The postmaster opened up a large book and found the address. He scribbled it down on a piece of paper and handed it to Wolfwood. " Here you go. "

Wolfwood looked at the paper and back at the postmaster, " Do you know where I can find a map? "

" What do you need a map for? " The postmaster looked at Wolfwood like he was crazy. " Are you going to the main office? "

" Actually yes, I am, " Wolfwood wondered what was up with the man's look.

" Why don't you just send a letter? "

Wolfwood shook his head, " I can't do that. What I have to take care of can't be taken care of in a letter. "

The postmaster rolled his eyes, " Then it must be something really important because that is a twenty day trip on a Thomas. "

" What about an Angelina II? " Wolfwood hid his shock at how far away he really was. Then again, he would ride through the fires of Hell for Milly. Something deep in his heart told him that she needed him and missed him. Matter of fact, Momma had also told him that there was a girl who needed him and he needed to get to her.

The postmaster shook his head, " About six to seven days if you stop to sleep and eat every other day. Are you certain this can't be taken care of in a letter? "

" Very. Now, about that map, " Wolfwood still had to get some idea on which way he need to be heading.

" Have it your way, " The postmaster reached into a drawer behind the counter and pulled out a map. " That will cost seven double dollars. "

" For a freaking map? " Wolfwood was shocked.

" No, the map is two double dollars, " The postmaster pointed to a sign on the wall. It was a price list for services and other things the post office offered. " It is five double dollars for address locating. "

" Oh, " Wolfwood reached into his jacket and pulled out the money. " That's different then. "

" Have a good day, " The postmaster pushed the map towards Wolfwood. He gave of a certain air that he was finished talking and didn't want to be bothered anymore.

" Thanks, " Wolfwood muttered and went outside. He put the map in one of the saddlebags on the bike then he put the cross back on the bike and sat down sidesaddle, his feet propped up on the wooden walkway. He reached into his jacket and pulled out a cigarette. He dug around for his matches and found one, striking it on one of the straps on the cross.

" Well, imagine meeting you here, " A familiar voice said and Wolfwood looked up. The match hit the ground first and then the cigarette fell, tumbling end over end as he stared. " Especially since you were dead the last time I saw you. "

Wolfwood finally found his voice, " Well I wasn't. What the hell are you doing here? "

" Not much. I just didn't expect to find someone I thought had died. "

" Quit playing games, Vash. Why are you here? " Wolfwood said in a hushed tone as stood up but Vash was a little taller because he was on the walkway. He was dressed like a normal person in a white shirt and blue denim pants, his hair had been let get long again and he wore very dark sunglasses.

Vash stepped down. " It's Knives. He managed to regenerate his wounds without any assistance and I really could use your help. "

" Knives? What do you mean? " Wolfwood's eyes got big. " You mean you didn't kill him? "

" I thought I could change him and he couldn't heal that fast on his own, " Vash sighed. " I guess I was wrong. "

Wolfwood shook his head, " I knew things were just too quiet around here. I bet he wants everyone to think they are safe before he tries anything. "

" Well, he's only been gone for two weeks but we have to find him before he can try anything, " Vash said, looking at Wolfwood over his sunglasses. " Are you with me? "

Wolfwood looked over his sunglasses, a smirk on his lips. " For Love… " He said, putting his hand up.

" And Peace, " Vash took it and shook it. He furrowed his brow when Wolfwood let go, " So, what were you up to before I found you? "

Wolfwood picked the cigarette up and dusted it off. He got another match from his jacket and struck it. He lit the cigarette and took a drag, " I was fixing to go find somebody. "

" Really? " Vash said. " You have friends around here? "

" No, needle noggin. I was getting ready to head to another town, " He arched his eyebrow. " How did you find me anyway? "

" Oh, I saw you at the bar last night but thought it would be safer to approach you in the open where no one would pay much attention, not a crowded bar where there's always some guy watching everything and everybody. I followed you here and waited to see if it really was you or someone that looked like you, " Vash looked down at the ground. " I really thought you bought it back there in Tonim Town. "

" Not quite but almost. The town wasn't as empty as we thought it was, " Wolfwood grabbed the front of Vash's shirt and got in his face, their noses almost touching as he growled, " Why didn't you check me over to make sure I wasn't dead, needle noggin? "

Vash put his hands up, " I thought you were dead. You looked dead to me anyway. I'm sorry. "

" Is it too much to check for a pulse? " Wolfwood didn't loosen his grip.

" I didn't think there would be any use, " Vash said through clenched teeth. " If you haven't noticed yet there are people staring at us. "

A small crowd of people had stopped to look at the little scene and Wolfwood quickly let go of Vash. " Get on the bike. We need to talk. Things have been rather interesting these last few months and I think you might enjoy hearing it. "

" I can't wait, " Vash said and waited for Wolfwood to get on the bike. He got on behind him and wrapped his arms around his waist tightly.

" Loosen up a little! " Wolfwood barked, " People are going to think the wrong things about us. "

" But I know how you drive, " Vash whined, tightening his arms a little more and pressing a whole lot closer to Wolfwood than he was comfortable with.

Wolfwood narrowed his eyes, ~Some things just don't change, do they? ~ He thought and took his cigarette out of his mouth. He held it over one of Vash's hands so he could feel the heat from it, " Loosen. Up. Or. Get. A. New. Scar. Needle. Noggin. " He growled through his teeth.

Vash loosened his arms immediately, " Drive safely okay? "

" Yeah, whatever, " Wolfwood muttered and started the bike, gunning it just to scare Vash. Vash screamed like a little bitch right in his ear and decided not to scare Vash when he was sitting right behind him. (^o.o^ Kuroneko-sama moment!) In the cloud of dust Wolfwood left behind sat a black cat with huge green eyes. It coughed and blinked before trotting off.

**

Vash and Wolfwood sat down at the small table in his room at the inn after turning the chairs around so the backs faced the table. After he lit another cigarette, Wolfwood looked at Vash. " So, other than your psychopath brother taking off, how have things been going? "

" Pretty good. I was living just down the road from the insurance girls and the short one always came by to see how Knives and I were doing. She said that she was worried about the big one shortly before I left though. She said the big one had started being late for work again and she was afraid she was sick. "

Wolfwood caught the cigarette as it fell from his lips, " What do you mean? "

Vash shrugged his shoulders, " The short one said the big one was acting like she has made herself sick somehow, and she's been throwing up and stuff like that. The day after she told me that, Knives vanished and I set out to find him. "

Wolfwood sighed, " Okay. How is Milly otherwise? How did she take it when she found out? "

Vash shook his head, " She cried her eyes out for a day or two after we thought you died but she got it together because she was certain you wanted her to be strong. The short one and her followed me to LR because they didn't want me to get hurt but they almost got killed themselves. "

" Really? " Wolfwood put the cigarette out. He tried not to show it but he really was worried about Milly. Had the girl had that much of an effect on him in such a short time?

" Legato lured me to a hill just above LR. He wanted me to kill him… he kept telling me to shoot him but I just couldn't. He blocked my way out with some townspeople he had under his control and I had no choice but to stay there even though the townspeople were shooting me. I still wouldn't kill him so he upped the ante. "

Wolfwood caught his breath, " He didn't… "

" He did… some of the people he was controlling found the insurance girls somehow. I think they were on their way into town even thought I told them not to come. I heard the small one yell the big one's name and watched as the puppets threw them both to the ground. They shot at the ground around them… They were trying to get me to kill Legato as he told me that it didn't matter, friend or foe, whoever came close to me died.

" He kept telling me to shoot him and it would end, " Vash started to whisper, a tear coming to his eye. " He made his puppets close in around the girls as he taunted me about Rem. Everything Rem said went through my mind as well as some things you had said as I tried to decide. I heard the girls scream and I knew I had to decide quickly… "

Wolfwood patted his shoulder, " Vash. Legato was a psychopathic piece of shit. Do you know how many people died because of him? "

" I know but I didn't want to kill him. I know he killed lots of people though it still bothers me to think that I actually put the gun to Legato's head and shot him. I shot him… " Vash put his hands to his face. He sobbed, " It still tears me up to think about the look on his face… he was smiling… he died SMILING "

" That is something I would expect from someone that twisted, " Wolfwood shook his head before looking at Vash. " You know he was the one... the one who shot me, don't you? "

Vash gasped looking at Wolfwood, " What did you say? "

" He was controlling Chapel The Evergreen. I was just going to walk away after I had defeated him but he started screaming and I could tell he had no control. I tried to dodge his shots but he managed to hit me twice and grazed me with the other bullets, " Wolfwood relit his cigarette and took a couple of drags from it.

" Legato missed? You should have been full of holes, " Vash said in quiet amazement.

" I know. " Wolfwood rolled the cigarette around in the ashtray, whittling the ashes to a point before he flicked them off. He had fallen back into the habit rather quickly but he didn't feel whole unless he had a cigarette in his hand. " I found it strange myself. "

" I know he tried to kill you just because you were my friend and helping me, " Vash shook his head, " I'm sorry I put you in danger like that. "

" I fell into it all by myself, " Wolfwood sighed. " You helped once I was there but I led myself there on my own accord. "

Vash looked up, a puzzled expression on his face, " What are you talking about? If I had never spotted you on the way to May City…"

" I would have died but that was just a mere stroke of luck because I had been looking for you. Vash, there is something I need to tell you. "

" What is it, Wolfwood? " Vash looked into Wolfwood's eyes.

Wolfwood took a long drag from the cigarette as he tried to think of a way to tell Vash the truth. How would he react when he found out that he had been working with the Gung-Ho Guns at first? Would he still trust him? " Vash, have you thought about what Legato said to you… about how friends and foes alike end up dying after coming into contact with you? " He said and blew out the smoke.

" I tried not to, " Vash sighed, hanging his head down. " I did think about it though. The Gung-Ho Guns all ended up dead after they came into contact with me… every single one of them. The insurance girls almost got killed because of me… "

Wolfwood took another drag from the cigarette, " Not all of the Gung-Ho Guns got killed, " He said as he exhaled the smoke. " One survived. "

Vash snapped his neck up and looked into Wolfwood's face, " What are you talking about? Was there another one that just didn't get to me? "

Wolfwood rolled the cigarette around in his fingers for a moment, " He got to you… he was with you for a long time but you never knew it… you never even suspected he was there. You didn't know it because you got to him and he changed his mind about everything the night before he was shot. "

Vash blinked, " What are you talking about? There was only the four of us after we rescued you from the side of the road and then you weren't with us that much until you found me in Kasted… " His voice trailed off. His eyes got as wide as saucers, " You have got to be kidding me, Wolfwood. Please say you are lying to me. "

Wolfwood shook his head, " Everything I have just said is true, Vash. They wanted me to help them catch you but you got to me and I changed my mind. When I got shot, I was trying to walk away just like you would have. "

" That's how come you knew where Knives was, isn't it? " Vash's voice was tinged with shock and a little pain. " That's how come you knew about Knives in the first place. "

Wolfwood shut his eyes and nodded his head, " Yes. Knives wanted me to kill you, Vash. Not at first but he changed his orders. "

The silence in the room was so thick; it could have been cut with a knife. Vash stared blankly at the wall behind Wolfwood and Wolfwood wished he could tell what Vash was thinking. It was obvious he was processing what he had been told but what the final reaction was not so obvious. Vash's eyes moved to lock with Wolfwood's again but he couldn't read any emotion but confusion in them.

" But why? " Vash whispered. " Why were you working with them? "

Wolfwood put the cigarette in the ashtray, stamping it out slowly as he asked himself the same question. He sighed, " When they came to me, I had already heard of you. They had already known of me too. They knew I had been Chapel's student and that I could shoot with painful accuracy.

" They promised me a large sum of money if I captured you and Chapel promised me his title. It would have been enough to take care of the orphans and I would have been able to stay around them more, not have to travel all over this desolate planet to collect money so we could scrape by. I thought you were some big bad outlaw that needed to be brought down for the good of everyone… and then I met you. You were nothing like I had imagined and that was when things got confusing, " Wolfwood reached into his jacket and pulled out another cigarette.

Vash watched as he lit it and took a long drag off of it. He let the silence hang for a few moments in case Wolfwood wasn't finished but he didn't start talking again. Vash sighed, " So you were going to do it for the kids? "

" Everything I ever did was for the children. I kept telling myself that but after I shot Zazie and I saw how much it hurt you… how much it hurt her, I really started to question everything I ever did. I didn't get much sleep the night before I confronted you because I was thinking about it all so much.

" I knew I had to make a decision before I tried to carry out my orders. Knives wanted you alive at first then he wanted me to kill you but I didn't want to shoot you. I kept telling myself it was for the kids but I couldn't get myself to believe it. I guess it was somewhere in the small hours of the morning when I made up my mind that I couldn't kill you and I would try to be a better person. "

" But what about the kids? " Vash leaned on the back of the chair.

Wolfwood shook his head, " I realized I couldn't take dirty money and I knew it would weigh on me forever if I went through with it. I had to go through with it or die because of the children… Chapel told me something that made me think the kids would be in danger if I didn't kill you. "

" So you thought dying was your only alternative? " Vash said. " Didn't you even think about how your death would affect the kids? "

" I did, along with everything else I thought about the night before I confronted you and then Chapel. I was resigned to the fact I would have to die for the good of everyone. "

" What would you have done about the insurance girl though? " Vash asked quietly.

Wolfwood's eyes grew wide, " What? "

" The tall insurance girl. Were you just going leave her behind? " Vash said, his seriousness painfully evident. " Or were you going to come back for her after your fight? "

" I don't understand what you are getting at, Vash, " Wolfwood wondered how Vash knew that he and Milly had done anything. As far as he knew, it had been just between him and her.

Vash put his hands up, " Don't play games. When I found you, I could smell her on you. "

Wolfwood narrowed his eyes; " You got close enough to me to smell Milly on me but not close enough to check my damn pulse? "

" I didn't have to get too close actually. I have a pretty good sense of smell, " Vash countered. " What were you going to do about her? "

" You may have a good sense of smell but you have no sense when it comes to minding your own damn business, needle noggin. What I was going to do was my business, " Wolfwood looked away.

" She's the one you were going to go see, right? " Vash said, pulling a business card from his shirt pocket.

Wolfwood saw the card from the corner of his eye and turned back to look at Vash. He could see it from where he sat and what it said: Bernardelli Insurance Society. He grabbed for it but Vash pulled it back, " Give it, needle noggin! "

" Let me see, " Vash turned the card around and looked at it. " This seems to have the address of the main office… interesting. Now, I wonder who could use this? "

Wolfwood made another grab for the card and Vash evaded. The game went on for a few swipes until Wolfwood narrowed his eyes and growled. " Quit pissing me off and give me the damn card! " Wolfwood lunged across the table, causing Vash to fall out of his chair. He went around the table and looked like he would gravely injure Vash if he didn't give it up.

Wolfwood grabbed Vash by the shirt and lifted him a good bit up from the floor. Vash raised a hand in defeat when Wolfwood balled up his fist and started to pull his arm back to punch, " Okay… okay. Take the card. "

Wolfwood snatched the card away and released Vash so he could pull out the paper he had gotten from the post office as Vash hit the floor with a dull thud. The addresses matched and he glared at Vash, " This could have saved me five double dollars, you idiot. "

" How was I supposed to know that? " Vash sat up and rubbed his shoulder. Wolfwood was back at the table and lighting another cigarette. Vash got up and went to the table, " You don't have to tell me anything because what just happened tells me what I need to know. "

Wolfwood took a long drag from the cigarette and looked at Vash. He exhaled the smoke, " And what is that? "

" You love the big insurance girl, don't you? " Vash smiled.

Wolfwood looked at him, " So what if I do? I think you like the shorthaired one and it is damn evident she's interested in you. How would you like it if I start bugging you about her? "

Vash turned red in the face, "Me? No, I don't like her like that. We're just friends… nothing but hugs here! "

Wolfwood nodded, " I thought so. Anyway, how did Knives get away from you? You never did tell me that. "

Vash plopped down in his chair, ' I don't know. He was out cold one minute then he was gone. I shot him really good and he had sapped his energy by doing the double Angel Arms when we fought. He almost died but I couldn't let him. "

" When did he vanish again? " Wolfwood took a drag off of his cigarette.

" Two weeks ago, " Vash sighed. " and I have no idea where to either. He is probably assembling a whole new set of gunslingers as we speak. "

" We haven't got much to go on though, " Wolfwood exhaled the smoke. " We may have to wait until he pulls something. "

Vash nodded, " I know. " He looked over at Wolfwood, " Hey? "

" Hm? " Wolfwood looked up from his cigarette. He had been sitting there just watching it burn for a moment.

" You never did tell me who saved you and nursed you back to health, " Vash commented.

Wolfwood smiled, " You're going to love this… "

**

Vash looked at Wolfwood with eyes as wide Kuroneko's, " You're shitting me. "

Wolfwood took a drag off of his cigarette and shook his head as he held up his hand, " If I am, may Almighty God strike me dead with a humongous bolt of lightning. "

Vash waited for the lightning to strike but it didn't. " Are you sure you weren't hallucinating or something? "

" Very, " Wolfwood said. " I realized there was so much left to do once I got to the church. I told God I wasn't ready to go yet and I wanted to stay… I wanted to stay with all of you. I guess he heard me and agreed. "

" That I don't doubt but what you just told me... it had to be withdrawal from the cigarettes… the alcohol… the lead from the bullets, " Vash sputtered. " Houses full of people don't vanish into thin air after taking care of someone for three months. "

" This one did, " Wolfwood smiled. The look on Vash's face was priceless.

Vash shook his head; " I won't believe that part it until I see some proof. "

" The bike and the cross aren't enough? " Wolfwood arched an eyebrow.

" You could have bought those anywhere, " Vash stated. " You're always buying crappy bikes that break down and you could have had someone make the cross for you. "

Wolfwood grabbed Vash by the shirt again, " The bike is not crappy! It is an Angelina II in mint condition. Momma made the cross for me… I think she did anyway. "

" Cussing angels with guns, " Vash muttered to himself. " Something just doesn't sound right about that. "

Wolfwood chuckled as he let go of Vash's shirt, " Almost as unbelievable as a cussing priest with a small arsenal. "

" Shut up. I know that CAN happen, " Vash narrowed his eyes. " But how could she have been your mother? She said she didn't know your name until you told it to Eve. "

" Like I said before, it must have been some elaborate act to make me comfortable but it did happen, needle noggin. It was as real as real can get, " Wolfwood took another drag off his cigarette. " Besides, I never said she was my mother but she resembled what I remembered her looking like. "

" I'm sorry but this is so weird to hear this. I want to believe you but I know it must have been a dream or something, " Vash hung his head down and shut his eyes. " I need proof because my mind is telling me that the whole thing seems impossible. "

" Almost as impossible as me being alive after being shot by Legato? " Wolfwood reached into his jacket and pulled out Momma's feather. He ran it over his fingers, watching it glitter in the light of the room. He looked at Vash and decided he would show him the proof he needed to see.

" The God part isn't so hard but the angels and the house… I just can't grasp it, Wolf… " Vash trailed off as he felt something soft trail across his forehead. He opened his eyes and looked up, his eyes focusing on a broad silver feather that was two hand lengths long and half a hand length wide. " Where did you get that thing from? "

Wolfwood smiled, " I got it from Momma. Is this enough proof for you, Mr. Cynical? "

" Let me look at that, " Vash put his hand out and Wolfwood laid the feather in it. He examined it closely, finding it looked like it was made from pure silver but light as a breath of air. " Where did you get this? "

" It fell on me before Momma put her hands on my shoulders, " Wolfwood tried not to get an 'I told you so' grin on his face.

Vash handed the feather back to Wolfwood, " So… I guess I… Uh… "

" You believe me now, don't you? " Wolfwood arched an eyebrow.

Vash sighed, " Yeah but don't go telling that story to everybody. They'll think you've lost your freaking mind. Well, if they don't pass out because they think you are back from the dead. "

" I won't. I just figured that you would enjoy hearing it since the impossible seems to be your lifestyle, " Wolfwood tucked the feather into his jacket again.

" Not by choice, " Vash muttered. " What are you going to tell the girls? "

" I don't know yet, " Wolfwood sighed. " I figured I would stick to the kindness-of-strangers angle of the story and leave it at that. "

" Sounds good, " Vash yawned, " Damn. I'm getting tired. You don't know how much this had taken out of me today. "

" Don't fool yourself. I thought you would hate me once I told you that I was working for the Gung-Ho Guns, " Wolfwood yawned and stamped out his cigarette.

" Well, we all make mistakes and you realized yours, " Vash shook his head. " We all do eventually. "

" Make mistake or realize me have made them? " Wolfwood said.

" Both. "

**

" You have to promise me you won't move from this spot, no matter what, until I come back, " He said, leaning down to her. His blue gray eyes were more serious than she had ever seen them in the time she had known him.

" But… " She said, grabbing his hand in hers, " What if you don't come back? What will I do? "

He kissed her slowly and sweetly, his mouth tasted like cigarettes and she really didn't mind because she was starting to like it. She wanted it to last forever but she knew it couldn't. She had wished the night before could have gone on forever as well but it hadn't. He pulled away, " Honey, I don't even want to think about that. "

" I promise to stay here if you promise to come back, " Milly said.

He took a long drag from his cigarette and sighed, " I promise I will come back. "

" Then I will stay right here, " Milly said quietly.

" Thank you, honey, " He placed his hand on her cheek and looked into her eyes for a long time before taking up his cross. " I'll be back. "

" I'll be right here, " Milly said as he walked out the door. Shortly afterward, the gunfire had begun. She covered her ears but she could still hear it, fear welling up inside of her like nobody's business. Meryl had come into the room looking for him but he was outside.

She told Meryl she wasn't moving and that she promised she wouldn't. Meryl stayed with her until the gunfire stopped then abruptly started again. It stopped as quickly as it had started but he didn't come back. She waited for long hours for him to return as Meryl begged her to eat something but she wouldn't… not until she knew if he was okay.

Milly nearly jumped out of her skin when the door opened. Meryl got to her feet when Mr. Vash walked in and she gasped. Her words were " Oh no. "

A heavy thud on the floor made Milly's stomach clench and Mr. Vash's words were gentle but they stabbed her through the heart. " I'm sorry. I found him when it was too late and there was nothing I could do. He's dead. "

She rose from the bed slowly to see what had made the thud and she burst out into tears when her eyes fell on the massive cross. She backed up towards the bed, denying the truth and fell to her knees, burying her face in the blanket as she cried for him… as she cried for her first lover…

" Milly? " Meryl stood over her. She had heard sobbing from her room and knew Milly was crying in her sleep again. Milly had started having dreams about the day Wolfwood died and it was causing them both to lose sleep at night. " Milly, please wake up… everything will be okay. "

" You promised… YOU PROMISED YOU'D COME BACK! " Milly sobbed, not waking up.

" Milly! " Meryl shouted. " Please wake up! You're having the dream again! "

Milly got quiet, her tear stained eyes opening slowly and focusing on Meryl. She blinked a couple of times and wrapped her arms around her. " Oh Meryl! It was like it was happening all over again! "

Meryl patted Milly's back, " Shhh, it's okay. Everything will be okay. It was just a dream. "

" I know but I miss him so much, Meryl! " Milly cried.

Meryl nodded against Milly, " I know. I know you miss him. "

" I want him to come back, Meryl, " Milly whispered. " I want him back! "

" But he can't come back, Milly, " Meryl whispered.

" I should have never let him leave me, " Milly sobbed. " I knew he wasn't going to come back. I knew it deep in my heart but I wanted to believe he would. "

Meryl tried to stay silent as Milly cried but she couldn't help it. She started to cry too because she hated to see Milly in pain. Three months had passed and it still felt like it was yesterday when Vash brought the cross in after he had re-wrapped it. " Please be strong, Milly, " Meryl sobbed.

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