Trigun Fan Fiction ❯ Ticket to the Future ❯ Milly Speaks... ( Chapter 5 )

Standard Disclaimer: Trigun isn't mine…you know the drill. I'm not making money from this work, just having a little fun in my own way. Please don't sue me…etc…

Ticket to the Future: Part V

Milly Speaks

I feel really great today," I chirped brightly. I felt the baby move for the first time a couple of days ago. Have I told you that? It was sort of scary at first, but I think it helped me realize I really was pregnant. I hope I have a boy. Girls are nice, but…"

"Meryl has promised to go shopping with me later today. My clothes are getting too tight to comfortably wear. I hope I can a few really pretty things. The insurance society is still paying us to keep Mr. Vash under surveillance, but I don't think that Meryl has actually told the chief exactly what is going on here."

"Mr. Vash? Mr. Vash does odd jobs here and there to earn money. He moves crates at the general store when a big shipment comes in; he works security at the bank on occasion, and plays with the town children a lot. Mr. Vash is just Mr. Vash."

"Meryl is still working in the bar part time. She says we need the money. I hate it that I can't work like I used to. I wanted to help lay the pipeline from the new well to all parts of town, but I can't seem to do as much these days." I smile and lean forward to whisper confidentially, "The construction crew must have felt sorry for the poor widow. You know, they were nice enough to give me a job supervising the pipeline work. I walk over every morning and sit or stand around in the shade of an umbrella and give minor directions. They are nice people. I feel bad lying about being married to Mr. Wolfwood, but people in a small town tend to look down on a girl without a husband."

"I guess it's not too bad being pregnant. For a while, I would feel really sick in the early mornings, but the doctor assured me that the queasy feeling would pass. There was nothing I could do about it except to deal with it. I think I can see why men were not meant to be pregnant. I don't think they could handle it." I grin at the thought of pregnant men. They would look silly walking around with huge bellies. I giggle briefly at the thought. "What do you think about that?"

"You know, it's been a little over 4 months since that day. I still find myself looking to the horizon as if by some miracle, Mr. Wolfwood will appear.

I know he's gone, but still…" My voice trails off wistfully in the silence of the room.

"Yes, it's hard to be a woman alone and pregnant. I wanted everyone here to think that Mr. Wolfwood and I had been married. I guess I already told you that, but I'm sure that he would have done the proper thing and offered me the protection of his name and claimed his child if he had lived." I paused a moment at my train of thought, wistfully indulging in another fantasy of Wolfwood reappearing. "I wish he knew about the baby." I sighed again and strode to the window to look out at the town and the distant horizon. My gaze travels upward to the brilliant cerulean sky.

"Do you think he can watch the events that happen here from Heaven? I like to think he can. I wish I could see him one more time, just to tell him I love him and that I'm sorry for not helping him that day." Tears form in my eyes, but I quickly brush them away. "Mr. Vash says that Mr. Wolfwood spoke to him when he was in the desert; that Mr. Wolfwood probably saved his life. That's why he was able to come back here to be with Meryl."

"Sometimes, I hear them late at night. It makes me both sad and glad that they have each other. But, it is hard at times to feel so alone…"

Turning from the window, I glanced at the occupant lying silently on the bed. He has changed little since Vash brought him back. I want to hate him so badly, but I can't. I guess it's not in my nature to hate someone. "You know," I said, beginning again brightly, "My big big sister always said it was wrong to hate someone because of who or what they were. Everyone deserves a chance to make up for past mistakes."

"Do you want a chance to change Mr. Knives? There are lots of nice people here. If you'd give us a chance, you'd see that humans are not all bad." I sat down beside him again. Picking up the cloth from the wash basin, I wring it out and gently wash his face. He doesn't look much like Mr. Vash even though they are brothers.

"You know, I think I feel sorry for you. For some reason, you have decided that all people are bad and you only surrounded yourself with the worst possible companions. Professional assassins are not fit company for anybody. Maybe you should start by just watching the people here and seeing what life has to offer." A sharp voice catches my attention and I pause a minute to listen to the heated argument going on below stairs between Meryl and Mr. Vash.

"Meryl is still mad at Mr. Vash. He came back wearing his red coat and carrying his pistol. Meryl had a fit." Wringing out the cloth again, I gently dab at Knives' broad chest. "Mr. Vash says something is coming; that someone is out there waiting and watching. He thinks it may be you, but he's not sure. Meryl is convinced that you are the person responsible for Vash picking up his gun again. I guess that's partly my fault too. I'm the one who asked him to go get Mr. Wolfwood's gun for me." The arguing couple had worked their way up the stairs. I could hear them shouting at each other down the hallway now.

"I thought you wanted to live a peaceful life?"

"I never promised that I wouldn't pick up a gun again…"

"You said that Knives wasn't going to cause any problems, that you had everything under control…"

"I never told you that! I don't know what's or who's causing me to feel this odd sensation."

"Are you even sure that something is there? Knives lies unchanging in the same room you dumped him in 2 months ago. All of the Gung-Ho Guns are dead. You're the person that killed the most deadly of them."

"Shut up! I was forced to kill Legato to save your ass. I broke a promise to save you."

A slamming door followed by the harsh creak of bedsprings effectively cut off the heated discussion. The sound of a rhythmic tap reached my ears as I sat there quietly. "Mr. Vash and Meryl love each other, but they can get into the most heated exchanges. Did you ever love anybody Mr. Knives?" I looked at his face for a few moments as if expecting a response to my question.

I blushed as the sound of Meryl's voice reached me as she found her release. "If I am honest with myself, I admit that I hate hearing them together at times. I miss Mr. Wolfwood. I will never find another that can ever take his place in my heart. Perhaps, I should have gone into the street to help him. I probably would have died with him. Then, I wouldn't have this huge weight on my soul."

The tears formed too quickly in my eyes for me to stop them. I sat there, my head bowed and quietly sobbed as my heart broke all over again. I could feel my tears falling on my hands as they gripped the edge of the narrow bed. My throat ached and my shoulders shook in an effort to contain myself. Meryl has a lot to do and doesn't need to find out that I fall apart every now and then.

I realized the edge of the sheet was growing damp as I sat there trying to pull myself back together. The doctor said it was typical for an expectant mother to experience mood swings, but I seem to be easily driven to tears lately. I just wanted the ache in my chest to go away. I wanted to feel Wolfwood's touch again. It wasn't fair we only had one night together.

Warmth began to radiate through my clenched hands as I sat there. Warm flesh has met my own. Through my tears I see a hand covering mine. I feel a gentle squeeze. Slowly raising my gaze upward, I stifle a gasp as icy, glittering blue eyes met my gaze.

"I've often thought that tears are a waste of human emotion."

Knives was awake.

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To Be Continued:

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Chapter 5 for your reading pleasure. I know it's short, but I am pressed for time as Christmas is here for all practical purposes. I thought I'd throw in some of Milly's POV for a nice change. Let me know what you think!

Please R&R as usual!

Love and Peace,

Blackhat (^_~)