Utena, Revolutionary Girl Fan Fiction ❯ Kagayaku Means to Shine ❯ Meshiyoseru: To Call ( Chapter 9 )

Chapter Nine
Written: 05 December 2006

 

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Dinner was a silent affair that night. The twins were still tired from their exciting day, and their parents were too busy sneaking glances at the still unopened letter, as if expecting it to morph into a giant robot and start stomping on them.

 

After dinner, they put the twins to bed and Utena retired to their bedroom, sitting cross-legged on the tatami in front of her desk while Anshii told the sleepy toddlers the story of how the one old man lost his wen and the other got it back(1).

 

“The demons had all disappeared, and there was nothing for him to do but to return home. He was a pitiful sight, for his face, with the two large lumps, one on each side, looked just like a Japanese gourd!”

 

The twins giggled sleepily, and with a kiss to each forehead Anshii left, carefully leaving the door ajar, just as they liked it. Back in her own bedroom, she smiled at Utena's back and went to kneel beside her.

 

Kissing her love gently and wrapping an arm around her waist, Utena held up the letter, still unopened. “I'm not sure why I'm so scared of opening this thing,” she said softly, “I mean, it's Arisugawa-senpai(2). She was never a bad person, even at Ohtori. But I still can't bring myself to open it.”

 

Anshii nodded slowly, and they sat quietly for a few moments before the dusky-skinned girl plucked the letter from her Champion's hand and a letter opener from the wooden desk and deftly slit the top of the letter open in one motion. Returning the letter opener to its place, she gently lifted the folded sheets out of the envelope and had to smile. The paper was very nearly plain, coloured an almost invisible pale blue with a faint white border of lilies to it. Elegant and understated, so very like Juri.

 

The letter was handwritten, which surprised both of them a bit, having expected something less personal. Then again, what they had shared in Ohtori was fairly personal, so it made sense, in an odd sort of way.

 

“Her handwriting is better than mine,” Utena mused, opening the two slim sheets out that had been neatly folded into thirds.

 

“Utena, I would venture to say that the twins have better handwriting than yours,” Anshii replied with a soft laugh as Utena stuck her tongue out.

 

“That's mean! My handwriting isn't that bad!”

 

Anshii just smiled and began to read the letter.

 

“Zenryaku(3). Tenjou-kun, you have no idea how long I spent trying to decide how to address you. I settled on Tenjou-kun because it is, after all, what I called you back then. Has it really been three years? It must be, since I graduated from that place a year ago. I apologize for taking so long to contact you, but . . . well, I don't really have an excuse.

 

“I found your address shortly after I moved here to Kyoto to take over my father's business, and I've been meaning to contact you for some time. I was going to phone you, but it occurred to me that I might be less likely to sound foolish if I have a chance to work out what I will say beforehand.

 

“I think that I must be the first of the Student Council to contact you, since I am the only one so far to have left that place. Touga has gone on to the attached college, and Saionji has followed him. Miki-kun is still in high school, as are the others.

 

“But what I wanted to ask you is why it seems that I only remembered you after I left that place. Look at me, not even able to call it by name, though I'm sure you know what I mean. Ohtori. There, I've written it and I'm still alive. Once I left Ohtori completely, without ever intending to go back, I suddenly remembered you, and it seems strange that I would have forgotten you in the first place, considering what happened.

 

“If you don't mind, I would like it if perhaps we could meet. I understand that Kyoto is a bit far from Tokyo for you to travel during school, so I wonder if you might allow me to come and visit you for a short time. To be honest, running a business is simple compared to attending high school, and I find myself with a lot of free time. If you like, please write me back at this address, or call me.”

 

Three phone numbers followed, labeled work, home, and cell. The letter was signed simply `Arisugawa Juri.'

 

The pair were silent for a few moments, deep in thought. It was Utena that spoke up first.

 

“So, it looks like Senpai doesn't know about you or Shi-chan. If she does come to visit . . . how will she react, I wonder.”

 

Anshii frowned a little. “She didn't like me at all back then. I doubt that we'll become best friends overnight, even now that things have changed so much. As for the twins . . . I don't know. I've never seen Arisugawa-san around children.”

 

“Do you want to invite her anyway?”

 

“Maybe. I think it might be nice to see someone from back then. Sometimes, it still feels like a dream I lived a very, very long time ago. And we have several extra rooms in the house, so she wouldn't need to stay in a hotel.”

 

“I guess it's decided then. What should we tell Shi-chan?”

 

“To behave?”

 

“Very funny. I'll call her work phone tomorrow, I think. If I call at the right time, I'll only have to leave a message with a secretary or someone.”

 

Anshii nodded quietly. “I'll prepare a room for her, a bit away from the master suite and the twins' rooms. Maybe on the third floor.”

 

“That's a good idea. Come on, it's getting late. We should go to sleep.”

 

“In a bit. I have some homework that's due tomorrow, and I'm not quite finished yet.”

 

“Alright. I'll be in the bedroom.” They both stood. Utena bent down to plant a soft kiss on Anshii's lips, and then shuffled off towards the bedroom, “Night.”

 

“Goodnight,” Anshii replied with a smile as she relocated to her own desk to get to work. Just as she lifted her pencil, she heard the shoji slide open again, and Utena's head poked out.

 

“By the way, I love you.”

 

And then the door shut once more, leaving Anshii to respond with a smile and a soft, “And I love you, Utena.”

 

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Anshii carefully set the tray down on the table between her prince and the panther, and knelt before it. She would have preferred to sit on the same side of the table as Utena, but the formality of the occasion forbade it. Carefully setting out the very old utensils, she began to make tea in the old-fashioned way that she much preferred. Glancing back and forth at the athletic pair of women out of the corners of her eyes, she couldn't help but notice something.

 

Juri looked good. She looked very, very good. She'd always been beautiful, in her own elegantly fierce way, but away from Ohtori she became utterly, stunningly gorgeous.

 

Not that she was looking. Utena really was all she would ever need, but that didn't keep her from appreciating the fencer's sleek lines. And so she proceeded through the careful steps of tea preparation with a small, secret smile curving her lips.

 

A cup of fine green tea in hand, Juri took a slow sip, keeping her face calm while she tried to think of how to phrase everything that was on her mind. She was slightly annoyed with her source of information for conveniently failing to mention that Utena no longer lived alone, and more importantly for not telling the ginger-haired woman who, exactly, she was living with. Though oddly enough, she didn't seem to be able to muster the same kind of contempt for the former Rose Bride as she had felt before.

 

After a moment, things solidified in her mind and she looked up into expectant blue eyes, partially obscured by perpetually messy pink bangs and the gentle smile.

 

“I think . . .” She paused again, “I think that I just wanted to see you. I wanted to believe that everything that happened wasn't a lie, that I'm not going insane.”

 

“And now that you've seen us?” Anshii asked softly, “Has confirmation changed anything?” Utena nodded, her smile widening a trifle at the way Anshii was so easily able to read her.

 

Juri smiled wryly, distantly aware that she was turning the traditional cylindrical teacup around and around in her hands, a nervous gesture that hardly anyone would have expected from the calm, collected young woman.

 

“Honestly? I suppose not. But just the same, it makes me curious. There are things I want to know, about then and about now, questions that refuse to leave me be. So, I suppose it must really be curiosity that brought me to your home.”

 

Utena laughed softly. “Curiosity about what? You said you wanted to know why you forgot, so how about I just explain that first, and then you can ask whatever comes to mind?”

 

“I think that would work,” Juri said slowly, “But I'm sure you would like to put a limit on what I may and may not ask about.”

 

Utena looked over at Anshii, who gave a little shrug to indicate that she didn't mind, and then the pink-haired girl looked back across the table at Juri.

 

“Personally, I'm not that much of a private person, so I don't really care what you ask about. I'll answer most anything. Anyway, onto the explanation I promised you. Sorry if it comes out kind of jumbled, but it happened that way after the final duel.”

 

Both Juri and Anshii listened intently as she began to explain. Anshii had comforted the girl during nightmares, but had never gleaned more than fragments about what had happened after Utena's hand had been torn out of her grasp.

 

Juri hadn't been witness to the final duel, so she sat quietly as Utena explained everything that happened, her eyes flickering over to Anshii as Utena described seeing her impaled on the swords. Her mouth fell open a bit as Utena described the way that she had put her hand on Akio's face to push herself out of his grasp, and her eyes widened a trifle as the girl told of opening the door, and then the coffin, and finally the traumatic parting.

 

“I just laid there for a while . . . I felt like such a failure. And then the swords came for me, and I was sure I was going to die then. I . . . well, I wanted it to happen.” Her explanation became a little more rushed. “I had failed in everything, even in protecting Anshii, and I just couldn't stand it anymore! I waited for them to kill me, but . . .”

 

The princely girl was quiet for a moment, and Anshii gently prompted her to continue, by gently placing her hand over Utena's on the wooden tabletop. Squeezing Anshii's hand lightly, Utena continued the story.

 

“The swords . . . they couldn't touch me. I don't know why, but they just couldn't touch me. They made a sound like a roar and they tore the dueling arena apart, stone by stone, and the walkway too, until I fell. I didn't understand. I was sure the power of Dios didn't belong to me, because my sword had broken on the door. But while I was falling, I suddenly realized something, and I was able to tap the power to save myself.” Her eyes fell to the tabletop, and she didn't look up again as she continued to speak. “Afterwards, I wanted to use the power to break the chains that held people to Ohtori, but my . . . my control wasn't really the best, so I ended up removing myself from everyone's memories.”

 

When she fell silent again, it took the other two a moment to realize that she had said all that she was going to, and Juri frowned.

 

“But what was it?”

 

“What was what?”

 

“The thing that you realized, that let you save yourself. What was it?” Juri looked a little impatient, and Utena couldn't help but smile at the fencer's frustration.

 

“I don't know if I should talk about it, but I can say that I don't think it was my power that opened the door, or me who received the power of Dios. At least, not all of it or even most of it.”

 

The other two women were dumbfounded.

 

“I'm not sure I understand,” Anshii said slowly, “I thought you said that you used the power.”

 

Utena scratched the back of her neck a little, and gave a sheepish grin. “Well, yeah. I used it and I still can, but it's not so much that it's my power as I'm just kind of keeping it safe for the real owner for a while.”

 

“For the real owner? But who is the real owner? It isn't . . .” Juri turned suddenly pale.

 

“Not Akio! No way, it's not him. It's not a person that you know, Arisugawa-senpai.”

 

“But you do know who it is, right?”

 

“Yeah, of course! No way I'd keep valuables for somebody I didn't know. Don't worry. Maybe I can tell you sometime, but for right now I think that I should stay quiet about it. Maybe you'll just have to wait and find out when it's time to give it back. Honestly,” Utena looked thoughtful, “Honestly, I'm kind of glad it's not really mine. I wouldn't want to keep something like this forever.”

 

“Is it that bad?”

 

“Worse. It's kinda like . . . well, kind of like what one scholar somewhere said about writing. It's like getting into a boxing ring with one hand tied behind your back when the match had already been decided and you lost. It's incredibly hard to control. Maybe that's just because it's not mine, but I don't know if even the real owner will be able to control it very well.”

 

Utena and Juri were quiet for a moment before Anshii finally spoke up, and her tone was more `scolding wife' than questioning.

 

“Utena . . . when we were talking about why it might be that the twins are so exceptional, you distinctly said that the power of Dios was yours, and asked how it could possibly be affecting them.”

 

Juri glanced back and forth between them, hoping someone would say something to allow her to figure out what twins they were talking about without having to sacrifice her dignity and admit to being lost. Unfortunately, no explanation appeared to be forthcoming.

 

“Ah, well, um . . .” Another sheepish grin, “Well, I just wanted to, you know, well I didn't really want to talk about this for a while. I thought I could keep it quiet and just give it back when the time came, without telling anyone.” She did her best to look innocent and charming, but Anshii's dry look was enough to tell her the jig was up. That, and Juri laughing at said look.

 

“Glad you think it's funny,” Utena grumbled at the girl she'd have liked to call friend, “Just wait till someone settles you, then see how you like it.” Another look from Anshii prompted the young woman to quickly qualify that, “Because you'll love it just like I do! It's great! Really!”

 

Setting her teacup down on the table, Juri couldn't help but smile at the gentleness of their relationship. She doubted that she'd enjoy anything of the sort, but there was still time for that later. “It's getting to be afternoon already,” she said softly, “Perhaps I could interest you two in lunch? We could go to a restaurant, I've heard of some rather nice ones in this area.” Suddenly, Utena and Anshii froze, both looking over at the clock in tandem.

 

“Oh, my,” Anshii said softly, and Utena put a little more force behind the sentiment.

 

“Dammit!”

 

Juri blinked. “What? Is something wrong?”

 

Even as she spoke, Anshii was quickly clearing the table and Utena was headed for the front door, gesturing for Juri to follow.

 

“We're gonna be late to pick the twins up if we don't hurry!” Stuffing her feet into her shoes, she waited impatiently for Juri to follow suit. Within seconds, Anshii was in the foyer as well, gracefully slipping her shoes on and stepping out the door. The three of them climbed into the car, Anshii in front and Juri and Utena in the back.

 

“Quickly, please,” said Anshii, and the driver took off accordingly.

 

“We took the day off of school today, but we decided to send the twins to kindergarten as usual, and if you hadn't reminded us, we would have totally forgotten about them. If traffic cooperates, we should get there just in time. I hope you don't mind, but you're either gonna have to move over or hold one of the girls. Juri? Are you okay?”

 

Juri's face had gone a little pale, and she looked distinctly uncomfortable.

 

“You have children?”

 

END CH.9

(1) The old man who lost his wen is an old Japanese fairytale. I think you can find it places online, translated into English.

 

(2) Senpai - senpai (sometimes spelled as `sempai') is both a noun, a title, and an honourific, and it means `senior,' as in a senior in school. Juri was in her first year of high school when Utena was in her second of middle school, so Utena calls her senpai. The same goes for when Anshii called Saionji 'senpai' after he lost the duel to Utena.

 

(3) Zenryaku - this goes at the beginning of a short letter, to say that all the pleasantries (one's health, the weather, and such) have been skipped over.