Utena, Revolutionary Girl Fan Fiction ❯ When Doves Cry ❯ When Doves Cry ( One-Shot )

"When Doves Cry"
by: Oriana X. Myst

~Dig if you will the picture,~

Saionji stood a little ways in front of Wakaba. He was in a
heated argument with Nanami about something stupid.
Utena, Anthy, Touga, Juri, Miki and her stood by, just
watching the scenario. When Nanami said something doubly stupid, as
she was wont to do, Saionji turned his head and crossed his arms.
His eyes met Wakaba's for a second before turning away to
roll at the blonde's next comment.
Wakaba felt her cheeks flush a moment before she calmed her
fast beating heart. She wondered if he ever thought about that night…

~Of you and I engaged… in a kiss.~

But she knew he probably didn't. At least, not as often as
she did. It seemed as if she thought about it more and more these
days.

~The sweat of your body covers me.~

She couldn't get it out of her mind. Shaking her head to
clear her thoughts, she saw Utena staring at her curiously. "W-what
is it Utena-san?" she stammered.
Utena shook her head. "You had this weird look on your face."
"Perhaps Wakaba-san was daydreaming Utena-sama," Anthy
offered with a grin.
Wakaba waved her hand in the air and plastered a stupid smile
on her face. "Oh, nothing, it was nothing."
Utena lifted an eyebrow, shrugged and turned to the two who
were arguing again. Anthy turned back also. Wakaba let out a
breath. Whew, that was close.
After a while, everyone began to get bored and started to
drift away. Juri and Miki were the first to go. Utena and Anthy
started to leave as well. When Touga went to walk off, Nanami cut
herself off, flipped Saionji the bird, and turned to follow her
brother.
Wakaba stayed and watched Saionji run his fingers through his
hair and walk off in the opposite direction, hands in his pockets.

~Can you my darling?~

"Hey, Wakaba!" Utena called from a ways behind her.
She looked back and saw Utena and Anthy waiting for her. "Coming!"
She turned back in the direction Saionji had taken, shook her head
and turned to bounce over to Utena with a grin that didn't quite
reach her eyes.

~Can you picture this?~

* * *

After class, Wakaba followed Utena and Anthy to their room
to study for a test the next day. As they passed by the Rose Garden,
Anthy asked them if they would wait a moment while she watered the
flowers.
Utena and Wakaba decided to follow her into the garden so
they could help. Anthy handed them a watering can each and they
began to sprinkle the roses.
"Lightly water the flowers as they are very delicate," Anthy
added as they moved to the next row of roses.
The garden seemed so small on the outside, but Wakaba noted
that on the inside it was fairly big. She lost herself in the
intoxicating aroma of the flowers and when she snapped back to the
present, found that Utena and Anthy were nowhere to be seen. She
looked around the garden but could not catch sight of either of
them. "Utena-san, Anthy-san? Where are you guys?" She placed the can
on the floor and walked quickly up and down the aisles.
Roses upon roses seemed to spring up all around her, an
endless array of red, pink, white, yellow… and other colors that
Wakaba had never imagined existed in flowers. Somewhere along the
line she got lost in the scent again and in a haze noticed a figure
walking toward her.

~Dream if you will a courtyard,
An ocean of violets in bloom.~

The green hair was unmistakable, the gait was long and
purposeful, and the hands that wrapped around her waist were
powerful. She felt her head tilted to the side and warm lips on her
neck. Out of the corner of her eye she glimpsed a few students
walking by outside the garden.

~Animals strike curious poses,~

A few stopped and stared in through the windows with shocked
expressions on their faces. Wakaba couldn't have cared less if God
himself had stopped and stared into the window. She let her eyes
drift shut as the powerful hands caressed her neck and ran down her
body toward her legs. The mouth on her neck drifted over to her lips
and she wrapped her own arms around the well-built neck.

~They can feel the heat,
The heat between me and you.~

Strong arms supported her weight as she swooned in the kiss.
The hands massaged her back in a loving gesture and the scent of
roses became even more powerful. Wakaba let out a small moan of
pleasure as one hand cupped her face and the kiss became deeper. The
other hand unbuttoned her uniform shirt and exposed her breasts to
the cool garden air. She gasped when the hand let go of her face to
rub tenderly across her nipples. She was on the garden floor now,
she noticed foggily, although her eyes had still not opened. She was
being licked from belly to neck and the hands were now undoing her
skirt. "Ah, yes Saionji… please… again."
"Uh, Wakaba? Are you okay?" came a familiar voice through the
thick smell of roses. "Wakaba… Anthy, get her a cold cloth for her
head? I'll go get her a glass of water."
"Utena-sama…"
The voices drifted off and Wakaba opened her eyes
slowly. "Wha… what?" She sat up quickly as the real world flooded in
through her half dazed thoughts. "What the hell just happened?" She
looked around and noted that she was on the floor of the garden but
her clothes were still on. Was I dreaming? She wondered. She could
still feel the hands touching her and her face heated up. Oh my
God! I was having a fantasy in the middle of the Rose Garden! But…
no… it was…so real… She put a hand up to her lips. The kiss had
been real, hadn't it? The whole thing…
A dream?

~How can you just leave me standing,
Alone in a world that's so cold? (So cold)~

* * *

"Man Wakaba," Utena began when they finally got to her and
Anthy's room. "You gave me a scare. I thought you had had a stroke
or something!"
Wakaba blushed a light pink and sighed. "I'm sorry Utena-
san, I didn't mean to worry you. I really don't know what happened
to me. I must've not had enough to eat this morning or something,"
she lied. What else was she going to tell her? That she had
fantasized about Saionji? She didn't even want to think of what Utena
would think of her then.
"Well, just don't do it again you hear?" Utena said and poked
Wakaba's nose.
"Hai."
Anthy walked in the room then, and began to set the table
for lunch.
"Choo," came the muffled voice of Chuchu as he tried to climb
out of Anthy's apron pocket.
"What are we having today Anthy?"
"Oh, your favorite dish, Utena-sama."
"My favorite dish?"
"Yes, octopus soup."
"Choo!" Chuchu rubbed his/its belly.
"Eh…"
Wakaba stared off toward the window and wondered slightly if
she should just give up on Saionji. Was it even worth all the
heartache? Sure, she had come on to him when he had stayed in her
apartment a few weeks before, and yeah, she had been the one to
seduce him into sleeping with her… sort of… but…

~Maybe I'm just too demanding,
Maybe I'm just like my father-too bold.~

She shook her head, more to answer herself than anything, and
turned back to Utena who was looking down at her bowl, which had
tentacles sticking out of it.
"Uh, A-Anthy?" Utena stuttered. "It's… er… it's moving…"
Wakaba lifted an eyebrow. That was interesting. She watched
as the tentacles probed around for a grip and then began to push down
on the table. When it finally got high enough to walk, it began
doing so… toward Utena.
Utena's face contorted and her hair stood on end. "Agghh!!"
She lifted the bowl quickly and ran to the window, heaving it out
into the midday sun.
Anthy blinked a few times. "Oh my."
Utena just glared at her.

* * *

Wakaba walked in her room and shut the door quietly. It was
late at night and she didn't want to disturb Saionji. She leaned
against the door for a moment and looked over to the bed where she
could slightly see his form under the blue sheets. She swallowed the
lump in her throat and walked over to her closet to change into her
nightgown.
Halfway there though, Saionji called out to her. She
stopped and turned toward the bed where he now sat up, his bare chest
and lustrous green hair shimmering in the moonlight. Her heart
skipped a beat at the sight and she felt her legs grow weak. Why did
he have to be so gorgeous?
"Come here, Wakaba," he purred.
Wakaba couldn't stop herself from going over to him.
Couldn't stop herself from standing in front of him. Couldn't stop
herself from letting him take off her clothes and stare at her
blushing form.
"Do you want me?"
She took in a deep breath, tears of joy forming in her
eyes. "Yes. Yes, I do Saionji."
His smile was warm, so unlike his usual cold countenance. She
loved him more when he did things like that. He reached out his hand
and grabbed her wrist, pulling her onto the bed. She went willingly,
as she always did, and let herself drown in his touches, in his
kisses… in him.

~Maybe you're just like my mother…
She's never satisfied (She's never satisfied).~


"But why, Saionji?" Wakaba asked again, as she had every
morning since he began staying with her. "Why can't anyone know that
you're here?"
Saionji turned to her with a snarl. "Because they can't!!
Haven't I told you already? Haven't you heard?!"
"Tell me again!!" She turned around and took a deep breath
to try to calm herself. "I don't know what the big deal is. It's
like you don't want anyone to know that we're together! Why do you do
this to me?!"
"Do this to… Woman! You're head must be screwed on the wrong
way and it is not letting you get oxygen to your brain, which in turn
is clogging your ears, because you are obviously… not… hearing me!"

~Why do we scream at each other?~

Wakaba tried to fight back the tears, but they wouldn't
stop. The warm tears on her face made her cheeks burn with shame.
She didn't want him to see her like this. She didn't want him to see
her cry. He hated weakness and she felt that if he saw her cry, he
would think her even weaker than she was.

~This is what it sounds like, when doves cry.~

She left the apartment without saying another word to him,
her tears sparkling behind her like summer dew on the wind. Why?
Why…Why do I love him?!?! He's such an asshole! God how could I be so
stupid?!

~Touch if you will my stomach,
Feel how it trembles inside.~

Of course he doesn't want anyone to know that he lives with
me! He wants to be free to live his life without "attachments" like
me. And that's all I am… an "attachment." She stumbled over a rock but caught herself before she could go crashing to the floor. Wakaba saw people looking at her strangely but continued on, the tears still falling. She had no idea where she was going; didn't care…

~You've got the butterflies all tied up,
Don't make me chase you,~

As long as it was away from him for a while. It was the only
way she could go on… by leaving and piecing together the pieces of
her heart in solitude.

~Even doves have pride.~

She ended up at the far end of the Ohtori Academy, in a part
of the woods were no one but her ever went. Her feet had carried her
there instinctively. They had carried her to a peaceful place where
she would be alone to think. She needed to think right now.
The fierce beating of her heart was the only sound as she sat down
in front of an old Oak.

~How could you just leave me standing,
Alone in a world so cold?~

He's such an asshole! I hate him! I hate… Fresh tears
streamed down her face and she buried her face in her hands. "Why
can't I just forget him!!!?!?!?"

~Maybe I'm just too demanding,
Maybe I'm just like my father-too bold.~

All he ever did was take, take, take.
The little things that he did give her felt like more,
though. Even if it was a glance over the table, a peck on the cheek
when she came home from school, a slight touch of his hand when she
served his food.

~Maybe you're just like my mother,
She's never satisfied (Never satisfied)~

In the morning, he was always aloof. He avoided her like the
plague and never had a nice thing to say to her in front of other
people. At those times, she hated him.
At night, he was the sweetest person, the kindest lover. He
could make her tremble by just looking at her, his hands could work
miracles on her body. Through her tears, she felt the heat in her
belly. Why does he do this to me?! How can I feel this way even
though he treats me like he does!


~Why do we scream at each other?~

Wakaba came to a decision then. Wiping the tears from her
face, she stood up. The sun was high above her and flooded warmth
into her limbs. She stared up at it, squinting from the glare. I
know what I'll do. Screw it. I love him. There's nothing I can do
about it. I'll just suck it up and go about as if nothing is
wrong. She sighed, she knew she was being weak, but she saw no
other way. If that's the only way I can be with him… then so be
it.
She turned from the Oak and walked back toward her
apartment. A sad smile formed on her lips. So be it.

~This is what it sounds like… when doves cry.~

***The End***