Vision Of Escaflowne Fan Fiction ❯ Dilandau and the Zoo ❯ Dilandau and the Zoo ( Prologue )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

I don't own anything mentioned in this story



I don't own anything mentioned in this story.

Dilandau and the Zoo:

Narrator: (the voice of a man) One day there was a young boy named Dilandau, and this young boy loved animals. His favorite is the bear. In fact he even has a stuf…

Dilandau: Hey, Announcer. You mind not getting that personal, I have a reputation to uphold. Or, we could introduce to very close friend of mine.

Narrator: Really, I would love to meet your friend, perhaps we could have tea together.
(Dilandau pulls out a flame-thrower)

Dilandau: Camille, Narrator, Narrator, Camille. (Dilly proceeds to torch the narrator)

Narrator: (coughs black smoke) I quit…

Jaguar: Wait! Oh, great, Dilandau look what you did. You scared off another narrator. (Dilandau is singing "another one bites the dust…") I guess I'll have to narrate now. Now you straighten up or we'll lock you up again.

Dilandau: (in a so innocent that you know it's pure evil tone) o.k. I promise, no more narrators… hahahaha HaHaaaaaHHHaaaaaaaahahahaha Mwuhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha….

Jaguar: What's so funny?
Dilandau: Nothing…

Jaguar: Anywise, where did you leave off?

Dilandau: well the narrator was about to tell everyone about my teddy...ROOSEVELT coin collection… (Dilandau gets shifty eyed)

Jaguar: Roosevelt wasn't on a coin.

Dilandau: yes he was…

Jaguar: Right… anyway… The young boy loved animals. So he decided to go to the zoo. But he realized he couldn't drive, he wasn't old enough, so he went to one of his licensed friends and invited them to the zoo.

Dilandau: (to Folken) Hey Folken I got this thing to do and I need a ride, I'll pay of course, all you need to do is drop me off, I can get a cab back.

Folken: Can I come?

Dilandau: No!

Folken: Why not?

Dilandau: Because it's sort of personal, and I don't want everyone knowing about it…

Folken: O.K. well you have to tell me so I can drop you off.

Dilandau: the zoo

Folken: The Zoo! Dilandau You like those cute furry cuddly animals. What's gotten into you.

Dilandau: Can you keep it down, I don't the whole world to know.
(Van overheard this part of the conversation)

Van: Dilly Likes the Zoo! HaHaHaHahahaha (he then tells everyone he can about it)

Dilandau: Great, can we now, I need to get of here now before everyone knows.

Folken: Sure, let's go.

Jaguar: I'm sorry to interrupt but we have a new announcer, So Dilly don't flame him.

Narrator #2: (it's an old woman's voice) Well, after the boy found his ride he was off to the zoo, They soon arrived and he bought his ticket and went in. As he proceeded to the bear area, Millerna and Hitomi stopped him.

Hitomi: Dilly? What in Gaea are you doing here.

Dilandau: (covering himself very quickly) Well, I heard they feed the snakes about now. So I thought watching a
boa constrictor eat a big rat was worth seeing.

Millerna: Ewwww, I don't understand boys at all. Come on Hitomi let's go see the elephants and the birdhouse.

Hitomi: Sure. Bye Dilly, stay out of trouble.

Dilandau: he he he he he

Narrator #2: And so the young man very content with himself, went to the bear cages. When he arrived he had a grand time, he fed the grizzlies, watched the black bears, and the brown ones, he marveled at the pandas and enjoyed himself for several hours.

Dilandau: (as if talking to a baby) What a nice bear, that's a good bear, come to daddy, yes, who's a cute bear, who's a cute bear. You are!


Narrator #2: He picked up a bear cub and played with it. It began to suck on his finger and it's said that Dilandau's heart grew 3 sizes that day. He was filled with so much joy that he took the cub put it under his jacket and began to walk away. Everything looked normal. All that was awkward was a very chubby young man with a very skinny face, making the sound a muffled bear cub. It was nothing out of the ordinary. Why this reminds me of the time I went to the zoo with my grandson Luke, he loved the llama's and always wanted one, so one time he walked up the llama cage…

Jaguar: Hey! What Are You Doing! This is my story not yours!

Narrator #2: But I'm old and I sometimes get off track. It won't happen again, I promise.

Jaguar: Fine. But tell this story and nothing else. Or else, you're fired and no pay.

Narrator #2: O.K. I'm sorry. Ahem… On his way out he came across a very blonde young man named Allan, who stopped and asked him if he had any Grey Poupon.

Dillandau: bear cub

Narrator: that's right, he asked if he the boy had a bear cub. The boy naturally denied it.

Allan: Do you have any Grey Poupon? Great, Now I'm messing up, come on narrator get it straight, you broke my concentration. I Can't Work Under These Conditions!

Dilandau: (whispering to Allan) play it off. No I don't have any Grey Poupon, and I don't have a bear cub either.

Allan: Ahh, that's good, because the zoo is missing one. But what would you want with a bear cub, unless you were having a barbecue. Your not having a barbecue, are you?

Dilandau: nope. Hey what are you doing here?!

Allan: Duhh, I'm a knight of Astoria, and all knights have hawks, so the zoo asked me to do a presentation for the kiddies. So I thought, all right, but for the children though. Hey… Wait a minute what are you doing here?

Dilandau: (thinking quickly again) Hey a very attractive young blonde girl is looking at you.

Allan: Where?

Dilandau: Over there beyond those trees that you can't see me from.

Allan: Good-bye young child, duty calls, no single girl can go without meeting me.

Narrator #2: Well, young Dilandau decided to leave the zoo after Allan comment made him feel ill. He almost made it through when an alarm went off.

Officer: Sir, please step this way, if you have any gifts or packages please check them, and remove all metal items.

Narrator #2: Dilandau quickly put the bear in a sleeper hold and knocked it out for a few moments.

Officer: Sir this bear looks familiar, did you take it?

Dilandau: no, It's a gift for my sister. See it doesn't move

Officer: (showing Dilandau the X-ray view of the cub's skeleton) this is a gift?

Dilandau: yeah, it's one of those realistic synthetic bears that are made to kids about anatomy.

Officer: Oh, sir I'm sorry, Please continue, and have a nice day.

Narrator #2: The boy took the bear home. He shared many good times with the bear. Until one day the bear ate his stuffed teddy that Dilandau cherished so much. Dilandau was so filled with rage that he had a barbecue in honor of the bear and it turned into a carpet, and so..

Dilandau: Hey Narrator can you finish your story, I want to hear the rest.

Narrator #2: O.K. why not, I don't see the author around. Well, Luke took the llama….

Jaguar: That's it, last straw. Granny you're fired. Dilandau you know what's coming.

Dilandau: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jaguar: and so the young boy was sentenced to eternity of listening to the Barney song.
THE END

Jaguar went on to be married and had 3 children, he adopted the first narrator as his grandfather. And had a bear skin rug on his floor

Narrator #2 went on to be a famous children's storywriter making millions on the llama story of her grandson Luke.

Dilandau is still listening to the Barney song.