Vision Of Escaflowne Fan Fiction ❯ Mark of a Goddess ❯ Mark of a Goddess ( Chapter 24 )

Chapter Twenty-Four

Mark of a Goddess

 

Hitomi lay back on a chair on her own private yacht. There was something extremely satisfying about lying hal- naked under the sun and not feeling even a smidgen of self-consciousness about her body. They were out to sea, so there was no one to see her tan lines, freckles or her voluptuousness … or should she say lack thereof? Anyway, it was extremely comfortable.

What a great present Dryden had given them. Now Hitomi wanted to know what she and Van could give him and Selphie for a wedding present. She wished that they could have attended their wedding, but Dryden left for Madrid after Hitomi, Van, and Chid came back from the stadium. He phoned them later that week to let them know that he and Selphie had gotten married.

When she asked Van what he thought they should get him, his eyes bugged out of his head and he asked, “What could we get that guy? He has everything.” Van paused before he admitted, “He already told me what he wants.”

“What?” Hitomi asked curiously, taking off her sunglasses.

“He wants me to go work for his company as one of his lackeys. I think he just wants an excuse to boss me around,” Van said, sounding vexed.

Hitomi laughed. “He probably wants you close to him because you two are such great friends.”

“He just likes teasing me and … we're friggin' adults! Why do I have to put up with his crap?” Van raged.

“Maybe I could go work for him?” Hitomi mused.

“What the hell? Why would you want to work for him?”

Hitomi shrugged her shoulders. “Well, it's not like anyone else would hire a girl who didn't even graduate from high school for a job that doesn't involve pumping gas or serving food. Maybe I could become a corporate suit if I worked for Dryden.”

Van frowned. “You can't sell my soul without my permission.”

“I wouldn't be. I wasn't talking about you going to work for him,” Hitomi said casually as she flipped through a magazine.

“Exactly - you think your soul is yours to sell? It's mine and I don't want you working for Dryden. If our funds get low, I'd rather go work for him than send you. Besides, you two are already much too close.”

“Hmm,” Hitomi said thoughtfully. “It sounds like you've already decided to go work for him.”

Van winced. “He made me a pretty impressive offer. A sickeningly good offer, actually.”

“And you're ashamed of yourself for wanting to take it?”

“I just always wanted to chop my way through the world myself instead of relying on other people. That's the way it's been so far. It's just that now that I know who and what Tarot users are, I'm just not sure that I want to live like an ordinary person. Folken has told me that once he's done with the Zaibach group, and it could take as long as ten years for him to finish dismantling them, he plans to disappear completely with either Naria or Eriya.”

“He doesn't know which one?” Hitomi exclaimed.

Van rolled his eyes, “Apparently not. I think he might just be waiting to see which one likes him better. I might be on crack, but I thought that he was leaning towards Eriya. I guess we'll see how that pans out.”

“Yeah,” Hitomi agreed.

“And then there's Chid. He went to Madrid to heal Celena before she had her baby, didn't he?”

“Yes,” Hitomi said certainly. “I asked him to do it. I couldn't stand the idea of her or the baby being hurt or reliant on drugs.”

Van touched Hitomi's cheek. “Yeah, thinking of them made me pretty miserable, too. Especially since Dilandau was the one who received the symbol of the scorpion. There's no way he's going to leave her alone.” Van took a deep intake of breath, put his hands on his knees and continued talking about their future. “It's just that no one is abandoning Tarot culture. Folken is going to do his part to pay the necessary retribution so that Chid won't come after him. Then after that, he's going to get married and have his heir. Chid is still going around taking care of all of us and Dryden is still sticking his neck out to take care of Celena - who is clearly not his responsibility. Allen can't do anything to protect Celena from Dilandau, even though he thinks he can in his egotism. I just feel like I don't want to leave that problem in Dryden's hands, so I should move us to Madrid after our honeymoon and work hard to help out.”

There was a pause in conversation once Van stopped speaking. Hitomi was thinking about moving to Madrid. What would that be like? She didn't speak Spanish. She would be like Selphie when she was in the city and unable to speak English. Thinking of Selphie, Hitomi started to wonder about her. Weren't she and Dryden still at the castle in Madrid taking care of Celena?

Hitomi suddenly piped up, “Hey Van, where are Dryden and Selphie? Didn't they go on a honeymoon themselves? I mean, they just got married!”

Suddenly Van's face, neck and ears turned bright red. “Dryden said that he didn't need a honeymoon.”

Hitomi's eyes opened curiously. “Why would that make you so uncomfortable?”

“I'm not uncomfortable,” Van denied.

“Then why are your ears red?” Hitomi observed.

“It's hot out here,” he said, getting up from the chair. “We'll talk about moving to Madrid later. Do you want a drink? I'm getting a drink.”

“Okay,” Hitomi said suppressing her laughter. She watched his back until he was out of sight. Then she let out a howl. What weird thing did Dryden tell Van about after his wedding? Hitomi thought about it for a second before she remembered the rose tattoo on Dryden's can. She shuddered. She didn't want to know.

 

***

 

Later that night, Hitomi was alone in the bathroom. It was too hot for her to have a bath so she was standing at the sink shaving her legs.

“I'm going to cut myself,” she said uneasily as she put her foot on the vanity. The ship wasn't exactly steady and the slight bumps and dips were enough to upset even the steadiest of hands. She took out her shaving foam and squished a dollop of cream into her palm. After applying it to her right leg she said again, “I'm going to cut myself.” She moved the razor up her shin and there was another sudden bump.

“Crap,” she said, pulling the razor away. “I'm really going to cut myself.” Hitomi took a deep breath and prepared to try again. She put her pink razor to her ankle and tried to concentrate on the job at hand, but her brain kept wandering.

What would happen if she really cut herself? Chid had told her many things about her true identity after they finished at the stadium. He told her that she was the Mercy Card. She was someone who looked into the soul of someone who would have been claimed by the Justice Card and decided whether or not that person deserved a chance to try to make things right. He told her what a big responsibility it was and how she should protect and use her powers.

Chid also let her know that he would come to get her from now on if he needed to judge someone, and he guessed that that time would be sooner than she expected. It didn't take long for them to figure out that Dilandau was the one who inherited the Devil's powers. Not many Tarot users were born with a symbol that meant evil revenge, but since one had appeared, Chid would need Hitomi again soon. He thought that Dilandau would probably try to get vengeance for The Devil. Dornkirk knew he was going to die, so he left that little time bomb behind to screw everyone over after he was gone. Hitomi hated the idea of having to go after Dilandau, but if he were dead or reformed, Celena would be free. That would free up other people, too. It would remove all of them from the care of Dryden and Allen, Celena, Gaddes, and Eries could all go back to their real lives. Except there was one thing, Chid said that they had to wait for Dilandau to do something wrong before they could go after him. Hitomi didn't understand why they had to wait when Dilandau's symbol was inherently evil.

Chid smiled and said, “I'm not the kind of god who forces people to make the right decisions. You shouldn't try to be that kind of goddess either. Even though a scorpion is what he was given, it doesn't mean that he has to succumb to his worst self. Look at Dryden. Do you see how good he has become?”

Hitomi nodded and agreed to do it Chid's way, but there were so many things that she wanted to learn. Was she going to have a happy disposition like Chid when she became the goddess? Would Van eventually die? Would she be able to have children? Hitomi threw these questions at Chid like they were harpoons.

But Chid's temperament always turned her darts into flower petals. He was as patient as an old man as he explained what he knew to her. “It's not possible for you to be cheerful like me,” he said gently. “I don't think it makes sense for you to have my disposition. It's important that you know sorrow. You must experience all emotions if you are going to empathize with those we judge together. But I can promise you one thing; you will not feel sorrow over those who end up condemned. You will be spared that sorrow. I carry that alone. Do you feel sad about what happened to Dornkirk?”

“No,” Hitomi admitted.

“That's because you understand that he was beyond your love, but he wasn't beyond mine. In many ways, I'm like a farmer who finds one of his precious animals has hurt itself in a trap meant for wolves. I can't free the animal, so I must kill it, and stop its pain.”

Hitomi understood. Chid's burden was great indeed. “What about the other things?” she asked quietly.

“Will Van die? Maybe.”

“Maybe?” Hitomi squawked.

“Tarot users who have mythical creatures as their symbol have a role of their own. Van probably didn't have a role until he met you, and now he's your protector. There may be some angry Tarot users who will be angry enough that they'll try to kill you,” Chid explained.

“People have tried to kill you before?” Hitomi asked nervously. She was getting goose bumps up her arms.

“Certainly. If they kill me then they can't be judged. But please, don't be worried about me. In that situation, I am perfectly safe, because at the moment of impact I judge them and end it. Things are different for you.”

“I can't become a murderer,” Hitomi said, quickly understanding what he meant.

“No, you cannot. If you kill someone, you will immediately lose your godhood and become an ordinary person,” Chid said gravely.

“I could be a normal woman and have children?” Hitomi asked sadly. It seemed too cruel that her only surefire way to motherhood was to take the life of someone.

Chid drew his eyebrows together sharply. “It wouldn't matter. I dirty my hands partly for your sake. Van will dirty his hands for your sake because he must protect you. You mustn't do anything destructive. If you do, I'll kill you myself.”

When Hitomi saw the look in Chid's eyes, she finally felt what Van and Dryden must have experienced in his presence. Suddenly, she felt sick to her stomach in a way she had never known before. Panic was surging through her body. What was she going to do? She had already done something destructive. She had stabbed Miguel and drawn Dilandau's blood.

Chid suddenly laid his hand on hers. “Don't worry about those instances,” he reassured her. “They are forgotten. Don't think about them anymore.”

Hitomi sighed and allowed herself to relax at his command.

“Let me finish telling you about Van,” Chid said warmly as he still held onto her hand. “A mythical creature doesn't have a purpose until they meet a Tarot user who needs them. It's not always a goddess. Usually, it's someone very ordinary. They have to save them. Sometimes, a mythical creature has bound themselves to someone condemned by me. The same thing always happens. If I kill them - the mythical creature dies, too. If you die, Van dies.”

“But never the other way around?” Hitomi asked.

“No, but I think Van will probably live as long as you,” Chid said cheerfully.

Hitomi didn't see why he was able to be so cheerful. It was unreasonable. Especially since what he was telling her wasn't happy.

“What about the last thing?” she asked nervously.

“Motherhood?” Chid asked stroking his chin.

“Yeah,” Hitomi answered flatly.

He shook his head, “I have no children. It's not that I wouldn't want them, but it hasn't been possible.”

“So you don't think that it will be possible for me either?” Hitomi cried.

He bit his lip, hesitant to say his opinion. “Dryden told you that you wouldn't be able to have children once you stopped bleeding or something like that?”

Hitomi nodded.

“I don't think those two things are related. I think you were unable to have children as soon as you opened your eyes and saw a moon.”

Chid said it gently, but Hitomi still burst into hot tears. Most eighteen-year-old girls probably didn't think about this. They were picking out colleges and working minimum wage jobs. They weren't crying desperately over lost children. Hitomi cried.

Suddenly, Chid grabbed Hitomi by the shoulders and jolted her face up to his. His blue eyes were terrifying as he said assertively, “Listen to me. Don't be confused by your position. Marlene will have children and you will be their aunt. Remember Akira! Remember what her love means to you! You don't have to have children through your body for you to have children. There is so much good you can do in the world for the helpless and the lonely. Not just among Tarot users, but for all mankind. And I do not know the truth about whether or not you will be able to have children. It could go either way. I don't know your future or your destiny.”

Hitomi thought about his words as she shaved her legs. She had managed to finish the right leg without cutting herself.

Chid said that he didn't know her future, but he wanted to cheer her on. Hitomi decided not to think about it.

She would just wait for her period. She stood there counting the days. She couldn't even remember when her last period was anymore. Before she and Van boarded the ship she had thoughtfully bought a pregnancy test. Actually, she had bought six. Hitomi decided to quickly finish up her left leg, rinse and then take out one of the packages and give it a try. She was probably the only eighteen-year-old in the world who wanted to be pregnant. Nothing was precious until it was withheld.

When she started working on the knee of her left leg, the boat bumped hard and the razor slipped. Hitomi winced in pain. She finally did cut herself. When Hitomi looked down she expected to see a trickle of blood dripping down in her leg, but there was only wetness and leftover shaving foam. What was going on? The cut had felt deep. Hitomi rinsed off her leg in order to get a better look at the gash. Had she already stopped bleeding? Chid said that he thought that it would be soon, but this soon? She and Van hadn't even been out to sea for a month.

Hitomi looked at the cut. It was in the shape of a `V' and it was deep. It should have bled, but there was nothing. It was dark red under her tanned skin, but not a drop of blood escaped her body. It had finally happened. She had a cut that did not bleed - the mark of a goddess.

Hitomi sat stupefied for a moment.

When she finally pulled herself together she got moving and grabbed one of her pregnancy tests. It was about time this was settled. There could be a reason why she wasn't bleeding. Maybe it wasn't a deep enough cut. Maybe there was the slightest layer of tissue that was stopping her. Besides, if she really had become the goddess then there was no need to keep these tests around. They were useless to a woman who could never conceive.

Hitomi read the instructions on the back of the box. Thank goodness they were simple; she didn't have a mind for heavy reading. She unwrapped the plastic tube and went to the toilet.

Five minutes later she was still staring at the clock. She didn't have the nerve to see what the results of the test were and she didn't have the courage to cut herself deeply to see if it was true that she couldn't bleed.

She was huddled in a corner of the bathroom rocking back and forth when Van found her.

“Hitomi, are you all right?” he asked anxiously.

“I don't know,” she said miserably. She was far too tense to look at the test. “I cut myself.”

“Are you hurt?” he asked, getting down on his knees in front of her and looking her over frantically.

Hitomi stretched out her knee and showed him the wound.

He saw the mark and touched it with his fingers. “Let me take you to the bedroom,” he suggested, putting his arms around her.

At this moment, Hitomi suddenly seized on an idea. “Van, look at the test for me.”

“What test?”

“I took a pregnancy test just now. It's on the vanity. I'm too scared to look at it. What if it's negative? Please Van,” Hitomi asked, as her eyes filled to their brims with real tears. “Please Van.”

Van sighed. He got up and picked up the test and then the cardboard box that contained the instructions on how to read it.

“What does it say?” Hitomi asked with her hands over her eyes. She couldn't see Van and his reaction then.

Van didn't answer her.

“What does it say?” Hitomi asked again, gaining courage and taking her hands away from her eyes.

Van's chin was tilted thoughtfully. Finally he said softly, “It says that Dragon's are lucky, little goddess.”