Vision Of Escaflowne Fan Fiction ❯ The Plane Ride Disaster ❯ Chapter 1

The Plane Ride Disaster

Author's Note: I would like to Dedicate this story to my buddy Atomic Kitten and all the great people who left me reviews in my other stories. This story contains a lot of phrases, characters and plot ideas that came from movies and TV shows. I do not take any credit for them. I also do not own any of the Escaflowne characters; God knows I wish I did. I feel that I always need to give fair warning about my punctuation and grammar okay it sucks. I know that. Well thank you for taking the time to read my story and please review when you're done. Enjoy ^_^

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On the plane…

The seating arrangement: Down the left Van and Hitomi, then Millerna and Allen behind. Right side Folken and Dryden, then Merle and Dilandau behind.

Hitomi: "Man I can't believe we're going to Greece".

Folken: "Me neither. Oh my god I can hardly wait, this is like my dream come true (bouncing up and down in his seat).

Merle: "What's his problem?"

Van: (turns to Merle) "Oh come on Merle. Greece just happens to have some of the oldest ruins in the world, the most fascinating history, and is the birthplace of democracy. To my brother, that is like paradise".

Folken: "The Acropolis, the Parthenon, Delphi, Olympus, the…"

Dilandau: "SHUT UP YOU CYBORG FREAK, OR YOU WILL BURN".

Van: "Hey back off you little pyro freak".

Dilandau: "Would you like to be the first to burn Van? (Eyes dilate) YES!!! BURN, BURN VAN BURN!!! YOU WILL PAY FOR WHAT YOU HAVE DONE TO MY BEAUTIFUL FACE!!! CHICKU, CHICKU!!!"

Merle: Does anyone want to trade seats?

Everyone but Allen and Dryden: "NO!!!"

Folken: (turns to Dryden who has been staring out the window the whole time) "Hey Dryden you've been awfully quite ever since we took off, you okay?"

Dryden: "…"

Folken: "Come on man, aren't you excited about Greece?"

Dryden: "…"

Folken: "Dryden? Um Dryden?"

Dryden finally turns away from the window and pounces on Folken.

Folken: "OOF… Hey what the hell?"

Dryden: "Folkie there's a monkey on the wing. A MONKEY ON THE WING!!! (Shoves Folken's face against the window) LOOK!!!"

Folken: (sees nothing but the sky and the clouds) Okkkaaayyy!!! Merle I think I will take you up on that offer. Let's trade seats".

Merle: (looking absolutely bewildered) "No thanks Folkie. I would rather take my chances with the pyro."

Hitomi: "What's with Dryden?"

Van: "I don't know".

Millerna: "Drydey are you okay?"

Dryden: "THERE'S A MONKEY ON THE WING!!!"

Folken: "Okay, he's scaring me. Someone help!!!"

Van: "Coming Bro…"

Allen: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

Van: "What the hell?"

Allen jumps out of his seat and starts running up and down the aisle.

Allen: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

Van: "Okay what is going on?"

Folken: "I don't know but it seems to be contagious".

Allen: "I AM WOMEN, HERE ME ROAR!!!"

Dryden: "THERE'S A MONKEY ON THE WING!!!"

Allen: "A monkey on the wing, a monkey on the wing, a monkey on the wing".

Hitomi: "They've lost their minds".

Dilandau: "Good that means I'm no longer the crazy one".

Merle: "You'll always be the crazy one Dilandau".

Millerna: "I thought I was the crazy one?"

Merle: "No you're the stupid one, there's a difference".

Millerna: "Huh?"

Merle: "My point exactly".

Dryden: "It's trying to get in; it's trying to get in. Folkie help! The monkey is after me".

Folken: "What monkey? Where is he seeing this?"

All shrug.

Allen: "I see it Dryden. I see the monkey".

Van: "You do?"

Allen: "Uh, huh!"

Hitomi: "Where?"

Allen: "I AM SPARTICUS!!!"

Dryden: "No, I'M SPARTICUS!!!"

Allen: "NO! ME! I'M SPARTICUS!!!"

Dryden: "I'm a hummingbird". (Starts flapping arms like a bird) "Feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!"

Flight Attendant: "WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON IN HERE?"

Folken: "Two of our passengers seem to have lost their minds and for once it's not Dilandau".

Dilandau: "Chicku, chicku".

Folken: "I stand corrected".

FA: "I don't care. You all shut up NOW, and you two sit back in your seats".

Dryden: "Feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee… oh look a flower".

Dryden starts sucking on the FA's head.

FA: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! GET HIM AWAY!!!"

Van: "We have to do something".

Millerna: "Oww let's play I SPY".

Merle: "Shut up".

Dilandau: "LET'S BURN DOWN THE PLANE!!!"

Merle: "And you shut up".

Dilandau: "You know I've had it with you cat. BURN!!! (Fries Merle).

Millerna: "OH MY GOD THEY KILLED MERLE!!! YOU BASTARDS!!!"

All sweat drop even Dryden and Allen.

Van: "Okay we have to stop Allen and Dryden".

Hitomi: "But how?"

Van: "I haven't gotten that far yet".

Folken: "CRIPE let's just grab them and tie them down in Dilandau's straight jackets".

Van: (nods) "That should work".

Folken: "Okay Van, Hitomi you grab Allen. I'll grab Dryden. Dilandau, Dilandau?"

Dilandau is setting fire to his seat.

Folken: "Never mind".

Millerna: "Umm what about me?"

Folken: "I want you to just sit and look at the pretty clouds, okay?"

Millerna: "Kay". (Looks out the window and starts to count the clouds) "One, two, three…"

Van and Hitomi both leap on Allen, while Folken tears Dryden of the AF who runs off screaming.

Dryden: "OUCH!!! Get off me Folkie, can't you see it's the invasion of the monkey people?"

Folken: "No Dryden, but I do see you've lost your mind".

Dryden: "I have not… Hey I didn't know your hair was celery".

Folken: "It's not".

Dryden: "Mmmm I love celery" (grabs Folken's hair).

Folken: "AHHHHHHHHHH LET GO YOU LITTLE PYSCHO!!!"

Dryden: "Yummy celery".

Mean while…

Hitomi: "Hold him down Van".

Van: "I'm trying".

Allen: (kicking and flaying) "Let me go, let me go. RAPE, RAPE!!!"

Hitomi: "God he's really gone off the deep end".

Allen: "you can not treat superman like this".

Van: "Shut up".

Mean while Dilandau is sitting in his chair watching the whole incident while munching down on a big box of Popcorn.

Dilandau: "Man this is better then Springer".

Folken: "DILANDAU GET OFF YOUR ASS AND BRING US YOUR STRAIGHT JACKETS!!!"

Dilandau: (gasp) "Folken such language!"

Folken: "NOW!!!"

Dilandau: (grinning evilly) "Say please".

Folken: "PLEASE!!! ALRIGHT???"

Dilandau: (salutes) "Ten four rubber duck!!!" (Goes into his bag and retrieves two straight jackets).

Folkie: "Rubber duck? What the hell?"

Dilandau: "Wouldn't you rather I just burned them?"

Folken: (who still has Dryden hanging from his hair) "As intriguing as that sounds, I'll have to say no".

Dilandau: (pouts) "Spoiled sport".

Dryden: "No Folkie! I don't want to wear that!!!

Folken: "Come on Dryden, be a good little boy and put on the jacket".

Dilandau: "Yeah Dryden the monkey had it made just for you".

Dryden: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"

Folken: (looking at Dilandau) "Thanks a lot".

Dilandau: "Hey I do what I can".

Folken: "You've done enough go help Van".

Dilandau: "KILL VAN?"

Folken: "No help Van".

Dilandau: "Kill Van, Kill Van!!!" (Grabs flamethrower and heads over to Van).

Folken: (sigh).

Dryden: "I'm not wearing that the monkey made it".

Folken: "No Dryden! The monkey did not make this. The doctors at the nuthouse made this. But if you don't put it on right now the monkey is going to kill you, understand?"

Dryden: (nods) "Okay!" (Slides arms into the sleeves and Folken fasten it up).

Folken: "There that wasn't so hard was it?"

Dryden: (grins and nods head in agreement).

Folken: "Okay now we sit you back in your seat (sits Dryden in his seat) and fasten your seat belt, like so (fastens seatbelt). Now I can go help Van and Hitomi with Allen without having to worry about you".

Dryden: "Why?"

Folken: "Cause you can't move".

Dryden: "Oh, okay celery head".

Folken: "My name is Folken".

Dryden: "Okay Terminator".

Folken: "Close enough" (runs off to help Van).

Dryden: "Bye, bye Robo Cop".

Mean while…

Allen: (dancing) "I'm a maniac, maniac".

Van: "Well at least he's not in denial".

Hitomi: "Dilandau what are you doing with that flamethrower?"

Dilandau: "Folkie said I could kill Van".

Folken: "Did not I said help Van".

Dilandau: "Yeah right kill Van".

Folken: "No you idiot you're just twisting my words around to sound like kill Van".

Dilandau: "KILL VAN, HE SAID IT!!!"

Folken: "Dilandau why don't you go count the clouds with Millerna".

Dilandau: "I'm crazy Folken not stupid, there's a difference".

Hitomi: "Why don't you go terrorize the other passengers and burn something?"

Dilandau: (eyes grow real big) "Now this girl is speaking my language" (runs off through the other sections of the plane) "BURN, BURN, BURN!!!"

Van: "Folken what are we going to do?"

Folken: "Hmmm… Oh I know! Hey Allen?"

Allen: "Huh?"

Folken: "Want to play a game?"

Allen: "Huh?"

Folken: "All you have to do first, is put on this jacket".

Allen: "Huh?"

Folken: (getting ticked) "Allen Come here!"

Allen: "How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?"

Van: "Allen?"

Allen: "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a of a Tootsie Roll Pop?"

Hitomi: "Allen?"

Allen: "Allen?"

Van: "Alright he's too far gone".

Folken: "He speaks the truth let's just pin him down and force him into the jacket".

All pounce on Allen.

Allen: "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"

Van: "Hold him down Folken!"

Folken: "I am".

Allen: "RAPE, RAPE!!!"

Van: "Quick Hitomi get his arms in!"

Hitomi: "I'm trying, I'm trying".

Folken: "Hurry I'm losing my hold on him".

Hitomi: "Got em. Okay zip him up quick!!!"

Van: "Okay" (zips up the back of the jacket). "There!"

Folken: "Are you guys okay?"

Van and Hitomi: "Yeah!"

Millerna: "I'm okay too Folkie!"

Folken: "Great Millerna".

Millerna: "Want to here how many clouds I counted?"

Folken: "No! How about you Allen?"

Allen: "Mommy I don't want to go to school today".

Van: "he's fine, lets just get him in the seat".

Folken and Van buckle Allen into his seat and put a gag in his mouth.

Later on in the plane everyone is sleeping except Folken and Van.

Van: "Folken I just realized something".

Folken: "And what's that?"

Van: "Where going to be stuck with these nuts for the next two weeks".

Folken: "Shit your right".

Van: "You thinking what I'm thinking?"

Folken: "I think so".

Van: "Which is?"

Folken: "Lets get the hell out of here!"

Van: "Right!"

Folken: "Should we bring Hitomi?"

Van: "Na the others will need her to look after them!"

Folken: "Good point".

Folken and Van let out their wings, open the emergency exit jump out and fly for home, just when Hitomi's waking up.

Hitomi: "HEY? WHERE DO YOU THINK YOUR GOING? YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME HERE! HEY? SONS OF BITCHES!!!"

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HAHAHAHAHA Well I hope you all enjoyed this cause I had a great time writing it. Please review.

~Charlotte~