Voltron Fan Fiction ❯ And they lived happily ever after... ❯ Step 3: Catharsis ( Chapter 3 )

I know what you're saying…Why won't this woman stop torturing Keith? Leave him alone already, dammit! You crazy author!

 

Yes. The sad truth remains that despite the brilliance of the little people living inside my head… and their continued plots to conquer the world… Voltron characters still belongs to WEP, storyline premise based on Devil's Due Comics. Certain events in the story are imitated from…actually, this one safe. It's all completely made up from my noodle. Keith's history that's not stated in the Devil's Due profiles as well as the actual plot were also made up.

 

Rating PG-13

 

VERY IMPORTANT ACKNOWLEDGMENT: This fic would not have been made possible without the patience, assistance, insight and support of the very lovely Sheila Bliss.

 

February 21, 2007

 

And They Lived Happily Ever After

(a.k.a. If You Ignore the Light at the End of the Tunnel)

By Ina-chan

 

Step Three: Catharsis

 

From what seemed like a lifetime ago, I still remember the eerie silence that followed that moment. Colonel Hawkins had just finished his speech involving an empire at war, a robot champion created by scientists and priests, witches and mythical graves. The group of strangers, who were to become my subordinates in this mission, started making rude snipes as they stared at our superior like a second head suddenly sprouted from his neck. While I held my tongue throughout the whole spiel, their very same rude comments were silently blaring in my head.

 

How did they expect us to believe such a load of crap?

 

Voltron was just some child's fairy tale fantasy, right?

 

“Now THAT was what I call a spectacular finish! I have to say, you really pulled through with this one, oh fearless leader.”

 

It seems rather ironic looking back at it now, doesn't it?

 

“Heh-heh. Flattery will get you anywhere but not this time, eh Lance?”

 

“Wanna make something out of it, squirt?”

 

“Now, now boys, enough! We really should head back to the castle right away and have Keith's wound looked at. I don't understand why men can be so stubborn.”

 

“Are you sure you're not just making an excuse to get the Commander to take his pants off?”

 

“LANCE!”

 

“Princess?”

 

“It's not what you think! Lance, don't give Pidge any funny ideas!”

 

“Is that bet still on?”

 

“Hell, yeah Hunk! Can you imagine me missing a chance of a lifetime? Of course, there's no way I'm backing down. Allura has to convince Keith to pull down his pants and show IT or I get rewarded with a kiss. A deal's a deal.”

 

“LANCE!!!”

 

“IT?!? PRINCESS!!!”

 

“IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK! Lance mentioned once that Keith has a tattoo on his thigh. I just wondered about it and things got out of hand.”

 

“You know, it's not very nice to talk about a bet on a person when the person involved can hear you.”

 

“You're right Hunk. I'm sorry Keith! It was just a joke! Don't take it too seriously.”

 

“A JOKE! That was a legitimate verbal transaction. Hunk was even a witness. Hunk, say something.”

 

“Lance, don't you dare pull Hunk into this and twist things around!”

 

“Well, Keith seems to be taking this well in spite of everything.”

 

“Keith?”

 

Now how does a man like me, who doesn't believe in fairy tales suddenly find himself smack in the middle of one?

 

“Yo! Chief, I know you have reasons to be mad, but aren't you taking this silent treatment a little too far?”

 

“Pidge, is the Black Lion having technical trouble with comms?”

 

“Everything looks okay to me.”

 

“Black Lion, this is Blue Lion, can you read me? Keith, if you're having trouble with your transmitter… do something to let us know you can hear us.”

 

I wonder…

 

“Guys… something's wrong… the Black Lion's just standing there…”

 

“Keith, say something.”

 

…how this fairytale is going to end?

 

“I'm going in.”

 

I've thought about death and dying. I thought about it long before my parents died. Thinking about death was probably one of the few childhood memories that I still remember.

 

“Holy f---!! Keith? KEITH! SHIT! Coran, do you copy?”

 

“Lance? Why are you calling from the Black Lion?”

 

“No time to explain. As soon as I touch down on the castle, make sure there's a medical crew ready and waiting for us when we get there.”

 

“Understood.”

 

“Lance, what's going on?”

 

“Don't worry, Allura. Just meet us at the castle. Keith, can you hear me? Don't worry, you're gonna be okay, buddy. Hang in there…”

 

When I was three, my family moved to the US from Hong Kong. We moved so that Mom could be reunited with Aunt Fay. Before we left, I remember asking Dad why Mom was still sad even though reunions were supposed to be happy. Dad said that it was because Aunt Fay was dying.

 

I remember telling a boy who lived next door why we had to leave… though I don't remember his name anymore. But I remember what he said. He said that death was fun. His grandfather died in the mainland two months before. His grandfather wanted his funeral the same way their ancestors did it. So their whole family flew to the mainland where the funeral was done up in the mountains, and his grandfather was put in a great bonfire that was very cool to watch.

 

I remember coming to the US with that expectation. I remember feeling disappointed that Aunt Fay didn't die. I remember my father trying to explain that dying was not fun and games. Dying is a part of life. Everything that is born will eventually die. And death is vital. All living things on earth will only continue to thrive because of it. I didn't understand any of it at all back then. Only the memory of feeling that death was something big and confusing stayed with me.

 

“How is he? Any changes?”

 

“No. The doctor still can't explain why he hasn't woken up.”

 

It wasn't until I was twelve, after the death of my parents, when I learned the painful and scary side of death. The knowledge that I would never see my parents again was too much to bear. When I was little, I used to hide in dark closets or under my bed to get away from my mother when I did something that will incite her wrath and punishment. When she and Dad died, I realized for the first time that death can happen to anyone. Hiding in dark corners became almost a security blanket. I suppose I thought back then that I could hide even from death.

 

I also remember obsessing over it for a while. Lying still in bed at night, pulling my blankets over my head, closing my eyes and trying to imagine what it would feel like to be dead. Trying to imagine how it would feel to be put in a box then shoved in a stove to be burned and cremated. Imagining my flesh burn, curl and char like the hamburgers on Uncle Raymond's barbecue grill, until there was nothing left but tiny pieces of bone and ash.

 

It scared the hell out of me.

 

Needless to say, I also stopped eating meat for a while after that.

 

“I don't understand. He was okay just a few minutes ago. He sounded okay during the battle.”

 

“If there's one thing we should all know about Keith by now, it's the fact that he has mastered the art of covering up his weaknesses.”

 

But it wasn't until Bev died that I realized how crippling death can be to those left behind. I finally understood why Aunt Fay seemed to have given up after Uncle Raymond passed on. There was nothing left to live for. I probably would have given up myself, if I didn't make that promise to her, if I didn't accept Hawkins' proposal, if I didn't become attached to my crew, if I wasn't needed to pilot a dying planet's saviour, if she… if people didn't depend on me…

 

“But Lance… The injury that Lady Raimi gave him was far from life threatening. Compared to a lot of the other stuff we've all been through in the past, that knife wound was just a scratch.”

 

“We won't know anything for sure until we get his blood tox scan results.”

 

“You think the knife was tainted?”

 

“It's the only explanation.”

 

“Actually that explains everything. Poison is the Boazan weapon of choice. Trying to determine what it was tainted with is another story. There are more than five hundred known naturally occurring poisons from the Boazan environment alone and at least three thousand known manufactured ones. It's not a big deal if you're from that planet. Boazans seemed to have developed a natural immunity to most of their poisons. But for someone who isn't from that planet…”

 

“That's why Coran and a representative from the rest of the Boazan delegate are questioning Lady Raimi now. Hopefully, we can find out what we're dealing with soon…”

 

Planet Boaz… I only read about it in history books as a cadet. It was a water planet naturally rich with unpolluted deuterium, a component essential to creating anti-matter fuel. It gained its reputation as one of the Galactic Union's terra forming success stories more than a millennium ago. The whole planet itself was a technological miracle with floating cities above water and complex mazes of both natural and manmade caverns on the land underneath.

 

I never had the chance to visit the planet myself, until just before the peace talks. Their floating cities always fascinated me. It reminded me of my mother's stories about nomadic boat tribes back on Earth who still preferred to live in the waters and would sometimes dock on Hong Kong's piers for supplies. Seeing them with my own eyes, despite the obvious ruin parts of the capital due to their civil war was still a sight to behold.

 

When the Drule Supremacy first succeeded in annexing that territory, Boaz then gained the tragic reputation as the first member of the Galactic Union to fall into Drulian hands almost a hundred years past. Needless to say, Planet Boaz' relationship with the Union had been unsteady, with the former seeing the latter's inadequacy to bring support against the Drule Supremacy's oppression as a form of abandonment.

 

Zarkon's early campaign as the new diplomatic and peace-loving ruler of the Ninth Kingdom after his defeat of Tarnoc the Cruel, only pushed the wedge on any chance of reunification between Boaz and the Galactic Union. It was only after Zarkon showed his true colors a little over thirteen years ago when he started his invasion of the thirty-five worlds surrounding the Ninth Kingdom's territories was when sympathy for anti-Drulian rebel groups started gaining momentum in Boaz. But things didn't really start moving until news of Voltron's revival spread throughout the captured worlds within the Ten Kingdoms of the Drule Supremacy.

 

Voltron's revival incited a chain of events that started to weaken the Drule's hold on its bordering territories. A civil war erupted in Boaz that snowballed into a revolution, and in turn gave its citizens its hard-earned freedom. Desperate to strengthen their defences, but still suspicious of the Union, the members of Boaz' new parliament agreed to a treaty… but only to Arus.

 

Who in their right mind would turn their back on such an opportunity? It will be a great blow to further Zarkon's campaign to extend his kingdom to the Galactic Union's territories if it completely loses its hold on Boaz' resources. It was also a chance to help those people, stranded and made slaves in their own home planet. There was no stopping the princess from extending her help, even if Boaz didn't ask specifically for Arus' aid… so Arus agreed to accept the proposal and acted as a Geneva Convention to Planet Boaz' visiting ten delegates.

 

There really isn't anyone else to blame.

 

I got careless.

 

It's really all my fault.

 

“It's not your fault. Stop blaming yourself, Allura.”

 

“Yeah. Who would have suspected that one of the Boazan delegates was a Drulian supporter?”

 

“Keith did. And I didn't listen. I even defended her. Now, Keith is…”

 

“… … …”

 

“Allura, we all know that Keith is just cautious by nature, I don't think even he expected that Lady Raimi was gonna betray us.”

 

Lady Raimi deBe'liat.

 

I should have known about her. She is the Boazan Parliament's youngest Minister, being only five years older than Allura. Despite her youth, she already had an impressive list of accomplishments, some of them of questionable value though easily dismissed. Then again, one man's revolutionary hero is another man's pirate menace. And Lady Raimi, being an active member in the Boazan revolutionary movement since the age of fourteen had a colourful reputation of being hailed as both. I suppose it was expected that Allura would instantly be drawn to her.

 

Despite my reservations on the air of caution, I never suspected her. In many ways, she and the princess were very much alike. Lady Raimi had the unnerving insight of a sixty-year-old captain, trapped in a young woman's body. When she spoke, she commanded such authority, reverence and wisdom that it was easy to forget that the person in front of us was still just a 24-year-old young woman, who can make irrational judgments like anyone else who's only had 24 years of life experience… especially with the affairs of the heart.

 

So when she asked to talk to me in private regarding information on a possible assassination attempt on the princess during the ceremony…

 

I got careless.

 

I should have known better… being that age and in love once… a lifetime ago.

 

I should have realized her primary objective long before she could act on it.

 

“Who could have known? I mean, it's unthinkable! A fine woman like her? A hero even! Suddenly going around to willingly hook up with Lotor? UGH! There is no justice in this world!”

 

“As much as I despise what she did, I can't say that I entirely blame her. I'm sure she mostly did it because she truly loved her people. Who knows what I would have done if Voltron was not revived and I found myself in the same situation…”

 

“… … …”

 

“With all due respect, Allura… You're definitely waaaay too kind for your own good. Stop sympathizing with the enemy and stop blaming yourself.”

 

“That's right. Keith's not going to blame you for what happened either. Don't worry.”

 

“He'll be alright. He's got Japanese blood in him. And we Japanese are pretty tough, y'know.”

 

“You mean obstinate.”

 

“For your sake, I'll pretend that's a compliment, Lance.”

 

As a soldier, I always knew that the danger of dying in a mission was always a possibility. Death wasn't just a fact of life, it was an occupational hazard. If I were to die, I'd rather it be on the line of duty… protecting everything and everyone whom I care about.

 

“<beep> Princess Allura. Are you there? Please answer.”

 

“Yes Coran, I'm here.”

 

“How's the commander? Has he awakened?”

 

“No… Coran, what happened? Why do you sound upset?”

 

“Princess, I need you to listen very carefully. The doctor is on his way. If the commander turns for the worse before he gets there, make sure to contact me right away. I'll be there soon with Minister Sol. Fortunately he knows how to make the antidote.”

 

“All right Coran! You always pull through.”

 

“Thank goodness. But, I'm a little surprised that you were able to get the answer from Lady Raimi that fast.”

 

“Princess… Lady Raimi is dead.”

 

“WHAT?”

 

“She cut herself with the same dagger she used to attack the commander. Fortunately Minister Sol has an idea which poison it is based on her symptoms. He said he can easily create the antidote. But we need to act fast. This poison works in a way that quickly shuts down the victim's nervous system.”

 

“But once Keith gets the antidote, he'll be okay, right?”

 

“We hope so.”

 

“Coran?”

 

“We'll be there as soon as we can.”

 

“Coran, what aren't you telling us?”

 

“Minister Sol is confident that we'll be able to save the commander's life in time.”

 

“That's a good thing, right?”

 

“He's afraid that because of the time that elapsed due to the battle… the poison's mechanism… even with the antidote, once the victim falls into a deep coma… there's a slim chance of him ever waking up.”

 

“That's a joke, right?”

 

“Yeah…there's got to be a mistake.”

 

“So killing the commander was never her goal. It was a ploy to cripple Voltron so Zarkon's robeast can finish us off.”

 

“NO! I WON'T accept that! I REFUSE to accept that!”

 

“Allura…”

 

“Keith! I know you can hear me!”

 

It's funny, suddenly remembering weird memories you normally would never think twice about. Perhaps this is what people meant when your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. Silly beliefs along with the one about when you meet loved ones who had long died before you and you follow bright lights at the end of dark tunnel. Life after death… I never really believed in any that. You'd think that I would have some faith, being a soldier who faced death more times than the numerical value of my age.

 

“Wake up! You have to wake up! Please…”

 

I suppose, part of me wanted to. I guess it's the part that also wanted to believe in happy endings. But since I've yet to see a happy ending, the hope of life after death goes down the same way. When you die, you simply become part of the cycle. You rot, you turn to dust, you become the earth, and you become food for the living.

 

“Keith!”

 

But, for some reason…right now… there's this strange sense of déjà vu. It's like I'm twelve again, hiding in the closet.

 

“KEITH!””

 

Even though I can't understand them, I can even hear muffled voices of people talking on the other side of the door as if I wasn't there. I thought I even heard my name…

 

“Hello? Earth to Keith, are you still there?”

 

As if a muted radio transmitter suddenly finding a signal, a cacophony of sound blared around me all at once, forcing my eyes to open with a start. I gaped in bewilderment at the vision before me. I didn't understand why I was back here, of all places… My heart ached as I let myself relive the memory.

 

It was a place I was all too familiar with. I've revisited it in my memories over and over many times. There were people everywhere. I felt them jostling and pushing against my back as we swayed with the movement of the train. Despite the vast advancement in aeronautics and space travel the past couple of centuries, subway travel during the evening rush hour in the BMT Broadway Line seemed to have remained frozen in the 21st Century. I instinctively pushed back against the bodies behind me, and braced against the safety rails to keep myself from crushing the one in front.

 

That was until I felt a pair of hands pulled at the sides of my hips through my jeans' belt loops, forcing me to look down to face her. I held my breath as I found myself staring down on a pair of familiar bright green eyes just as I remembered them dearly not so long ago. She flashed that lopsided impish smile that she always made when she was up to something... that's not always “good”.

 

I tried to keep a straight face as I felt the soft contours of her shape suggestively rub against mine. My hands instinctively wrapped around her to prevent her actions from evolving from embarrassment to torture, only to end up being pushed by the wave of bodies I was protecting her from, crushing her petite frame against the wall behind her. Red-faced and shrinking away from the nearby passenger's annoyed stares, it took all I could do to stay calm.

 

“Idiot! Are you trying to get us killed?”

 

“Well that's one way of getting your attention.”

 

Her laughter was infectious. I could never find within myself to really get angry at her. And on those rare times when she did manage to make my temper flare, I could never find it within myself to stay mad at her either. This particular day, I was too anxious to feel any other emotion anyway.

 

“I can't believe you just dropped everything to move here in New York City permanently, just like that!”

 

“I told you I'd do anything to be near you.”

 

“You mean… you'll actually fly from wherever you get assigned everyday just to be near me?”

 

“Why would I do that? That's the main reason why I asked to be transferred here in the first place.”

 

“… … …”

 

“What?”

 

“You know, you have no sense of romance whatsoever.”

 

“It's easier to be more direct to the point.”

 

“Boo! And what, pray sir, is your point?”

 

“I want us to be together for the rest of our lives.”

 

The mischievous expression on her face instantly melted. As her green orbs stared directly into mine, I could almost see the gears turning in her head as she tried to decide if she thought I was joking. I didn't blame her. After all, we only knew each other less than three months. But if there was anything I was sure of, this was it. I knew that I was born to spend the rest of my life with her. The only thing I could do was to hope and pray that she saw it the same way.

 

“So I'll be like your uncle's lucky penny.”

 

“What?”

 

“You know… the one he got made into a charm and keeps with him all the time.”

 

“… … …”

 

One of my fears realized… I honestly can't figure out how her mind works. Sometimes I'm not sure if she's really that dense or if she's being intentionally cruel. Then again, I wasn't planning on proposing to her this way. With an inward sigh, I instantly searched through the back of my mind to make sure the rest of the evening goes as planned.

 

“Are you going to take me with you in the bath as well?”

 

“What!?”

 

“Your uncle. You said that he took his lucky penny with him anywhere he went. Even in the bath.”

 

“… … …”

 

You can say, at this point, whatever was going through my head had completely frozen. I wasn't exactly sure if it was because I suddenly found myself trapped in the middle of her pace with no way out… or the sudden lecherous images that flooded my already overworked brain.

 

“You know…”

 

“What…”

 

“Normally this would involve a ring and you kneeling on one knee.”

 

I give up.

 

If you try to go along with her pace, you'll only get tired. I originally planned an evening of dinner, music, dancing and a nice carriage ride in the park before asking. I was quickly realizing that the only way to go about something this serious with her was really to become direct to the point without any distractions.

 

“I would, but I'm afraid the ring will get knocked off my hand and get lost in the throng of all these people.”

 

“... … …”

 

The expression on her bright green eyes changed once again upon hearing those words as realization finally hit her that I wasn't joking. Her arms instantly went around me and her hands clutched my jacket as if she was afraid to let go. She spoke as she buried her face on my shoulder, I almost didn't catch what she said.

 

“You can give it to me in the bath… or after… whatever works for you.”

 

I remember gently pushing her back so I could see her face. And I remember the embarrassed flush on her cheeks that probably reflected mine as she looked up at me with uncharacteristic bashfulness. I remember the faint taste of mint and the feel of the soft warmth of her lips in mine.

 

And the world stood still.

 

I didn't care.

 

The mob of people around us disappeared to nothingness. The train's monotonous groaning faded to silence. The car's swaying halted to a stop. But in my mind, as long as we were together like this, the world can go to hell.

 

Then she pulled away and lovingly cupped my face in her hands as she flashed me one of her dazzling smiles.

 

“Meeting you and being with you is the best thing that happened to me. These are the happiest moments in my life. I really wanted to be your lucky penny.”

 

“Bev, no. Don't… Let's just be like this. Let me stay here with you.”

 

“Baby, you can't keep hiding in your memories forever.”

 

“I don't want to forget any of this.”

 

“You won't.”

 

“But I will. I said that I wouldn't forget her either… but now, I can barely even remember her face without her pictures.”

 

“Who?”

 

“Mom.”

 

There. Another one of my fears realized. I suppose I never admitted it to myself until this moment. I didn't even realize it until after Bev died… that I couldn't even remember her face anymore. I couldn't remember my own mother's face. I couldn't even remember the sound of her voice. All of my memories of her were reduced to faint recollections of childhood snapshots of images and sound.

 

“But sometimes, we need to put aside memories that we don't really need anymore to make room for new ones.”

 

“I don't want to not need you anymore.”

 

“Keith…”

 

“I love you!”

 

A pained expression crossed her features as her hands pulled at the collar of my jacket for another desperate kiss before pulling away to tuck her head under my chin. In turn, I clutched to her petite frame, knowing that it was a matter of time before she disappear again.

 

“All the more reason you can't stay here.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because you have to keep your promise. You have to continue living on and find lots and lots of happiness.”

 

“I can't do it…”

 

“Yes, you can. You have to continue on and do all those things we wanted to do together. You can't let the dreams we made together die with me. You need to find enough happiness to cover both our lifetimes.”

 

“I can't, baby… not without you.”

 

“No, Baby. Don't do this. Don't deprive yourself and other people from finding happiness with you. Don't give them reason to be sad. You've become very important to a lot of people now. You're not alone anymore. Your friends… They're all waiting for you to come back.”

 

My friends.

 

I didn't have anyone I considered as real friends before I met Bev. All my colleagues in the Marines, even Craig… they were mostly superiors, subordinates, and acquaintances. And before turning our backs on everything and pledging allegiance to Arus… Lance, Pidge, Hunk, Sven… they were just strangers I never met before and somehow ended up becoming my subordinates. Of course I would have given my life for them in the name of duty...

 

…but to continue living on because of my friends?

 

My friends. Lance, Pidge, Hunk…

 

…Allura…

 

“And, even though she's been really patient all this time, a girl can only wait so long.”

 

“What?”

 

“Then again, you've always been a little slow on the uptake when it came to things like this.”

 

Her sigh of exasperation brought me back from my thoughts. A sad smile curled the corners of her delicate lips as she gave me another hug.

 

“If you don't make yourself clear soon, she'll get tired of waiting and leave you behind.”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“What else? Laura!”

 

Her infectious laugh rang again along with the melody announcing train's doors opening behind me. Before I could react, she pushed me with almost inhuman strength and I felt myself stumbling backwards, helpless to stop myself from falling into a mysterious dark hole. I reached out for her, but she merely waved at me as her image within the train's open doors slowly disappeared into a speck of light as I tumbled deeper back into the tunnel… into the dark… into nothingness.

 

For the first time, fear and anxiety started to well in me in the dark. This odd sense of vertigo left my heart hammering so fast that it became difficult to breathe. It almost felt as if I was drowning on air. I flailed and tried to grab onto anything, and felt an odd sense of relief as I felt a pair of hands hold on to one of mine. I held on to it like my life depended on it until the sensation passed.

 

The next thing I knew, I was gasping for air, half-naked, waking up on an unfamiliar bed in an unfamiliar room. And there were this pair of familiar clear blue eyes looking down at me.

 

“Good Morning, Sleeping Beauty.”

 

“…lau…ra…?”

 

Tears pooled at the corners of those blue eyes upon hearing my almost inaudible whisper. As the fog in my head cleared, I finally realized where I was. I was in the infirmary. From the corner of my eye, I saw that my friends had found refuge and were sleeping soundly despite their uncomfortable positions in various nooks and corners of the room. Allura squeezed my hand, as if the action would help her from bursting into tears. I shifted uncomfortably and braced myself. It did seem like she was ready to cry at any moment.

 

“You started spiking a fever shortly after the doctor gave you the antidote. You gave us quite a scare for a moment there. I… we… all of us… we were up all night waiting for you to wake up.”

 

“I'm sorry for the trouble.”

 

Her eyes widened and she shook her head with such enthusiasm that I was afraid she was going to hurt herself.

 

“It's no trouble at all. I couldn't sleep anyway. And Lance… Lance tried to keep everyone's spirits up all night. He'll never admit it, but I think he's the one who was worried the most apart from… Ah! He even taught me what I should say when you woke up. That's partly the reason why I… I'm sorry. I'm babbling nonsense, when you should be resting. I'll… I'll go get the doctor.”

 

For some reason, as she shifted to leave my side and let go of my hand, my own fingers tightened around hers as if in their own accord, forcing her back to where she was seated. She turned to me in surprise and I instinctively avoided her gaze in embarrassment. I couldn't explain why, but I just didn't want her to go. I don't think my hand will obey my mind's commands anyway, even if I wanted to.

 

“Keith?”

 

“I'm sorry. But…don't go yet. Please.”

 

She gave me a puzzled look, but squeezed my hand, encouraging me to continue speaking. At this point, I was starting to feel silly. But this illogical fear was still stirring within me. That little boy hiding in the closet still wouldn't go away.

 

“I just… don't want to be alone.”

 

At that point, Lance, Hunk and Pidge suddenly let out a chorus of loud snores, breaking the spell and bringing a strange sort of irony. I just felt completely stupid after that. I loosened my grasp and started to pull away to apologize for my childishness. But the princess simply re-clasped my hand in both of hers once again and smiled.

 

“All right. But only if you do it again. And if you don't mind, do it all the time.”

 

This time, it was me who gave her a puzzled look. She looked at me expectantly, as if I was supposed to have an idea what she was talking about. She bent closer until I could feel her warm breath as she whispered in my ear.

 

“Call me by that name you said earlier. Call me `Lura.”

 

“… … …”

 

How is it possible that a man who never believed in fairytales could find himself living in one? What did I do in my former life to be teased and made fun of by the Fates, making me run through these hoops and obstacles in the various turning points in my life?

 

I still don't believe in fairytales or happy endings.

 

Then again, the ending to this tale is far from over. And it's really all about perspective, isn't it? I'm slowly realizing that you can't really know what happiness feels like anyway, if you never felt sorrow. But right now, I'm not even exactly sure what I'm feeling.

 

With her being this close after all that's happened, I'm finding that the feelings I've always suppressed is getting really difficult to ignore. So when she backed off to give me space, as if sensing my discomfort, it was almost a relief.

 

“Uhmm… If you think it's embarrassing, you don't have to. But it would really make me happy if you did… call me that… Even if it's just the two of us…”

 

Seeing that smile, I ask myself again… am I happy?

 

I suppose, in a way, I am. Not in the same kind of happiness that I had with Bev... or when I was growing up with Aunt Fay and Uncle Raymond… or even with Mom and Dad. But I suppose… I know well enough to recognize that I am happy. It was a comforting type of happy…

 

At one point, I was afraid that it threatened to make me forget the happiness that I knew before. But now… I know that it's not the end of the world if that happens either. It's strange that after you have these experiences you begin to see everything with different eyes.

 

Allura… It was obvious that the rest of the team already sees her as one of the guys. I've caught her engaged with snippets of conversations with them that were not appropriate for a woman to hear… more even so a woman of her social status. Then again, Lance's intentions with her were never a secret.

 

On hind sight, I was really the only one left who kept her away at arm's reach. I understand why I did it. I suppose I always knew, but I simply didn't want to acknowledge it. Even just acknowledging my feelings already felt a lot like I was betraying Bev.

 

But seeing Allura now and seeing her watch me expectantly with those clear blue eyes… perhaps, it was time to accept that things are changing. I don't think I'm ready to move forward yet… but admitting it at least is one baby step. And maybe, I'll have the courage once again to have those baby steps turn into more confident strides…

 

Someday.

 

“Sure... `Lura”

 

There was something endearing about the uncharacteristic shyness that seemed to envelope her body movements as she heard my whisper.

 

“Uhm… and there's another... You see…there's this thing… and… I was hoping that you wouldn't mind helping me out. But only if you want to!”

 

It was something to get used to. But it could just be the red-blooded male in me reacting to the self-conscious flush that suddenly crept from her neck to cover the rest of her face, and the shy smile that touched her lips. It was almost a revelation to realize that she too has that side. To be quite honest, her nervousness was starting make me feel nervous too…

 

“Okay.”

 

Seeing those clear blue eyes look at me hopefully, accompanied with that uncharacteristic nervous smile with a promise of a second chance… I don't think even that is enough. It's still not enough to convince me that anyone can ever hope for a happy ending. I still believe that when things end… its never happy.

 

But that shouldn't stop anybody from trying to get it… even if it's only one baby step at a time.

 

“Can you pull down your pants and show `it'?”

 

“… … …”

 

…baby steps…one… baby step… at a time…

 

 

*********

The End ^_^.

 

Author's squawk:

 

What? You're actually reading this part too? You are such a sweetie. Thank you so much for reading this fic. I finally finished first Voltron fic. The first time is always special… ^_^.

 

On a side note… Planet Boaz is a tribute to another older super robot anime, Voltes V. Of course, Voltes V is the 2nd instalment to Tadao Nagahama's Robot Romance trilogy which was composed of “Choudenji Robo Combattler V” (1976), “Choudenji Machine Voltes V” (1977), and “Tousshou Daimos” (1978). Speaking of which Tadao Nagahama is also best known in the North American anime community as the guy who directed “The Rose of Versailles” (1979).

 

Anywayz… going back on-topic… Planet Boaz (Changed to Boazania in the Philippine version for some strange reason) is the home planet of the enemies in Voltes V. Of course, this fic's version is nothing like the anime's Boaz. Though, I did kind of borrow their system of government. What? You dunno what Voltes V is? It's only the best Check it out on the internet. You Tube has a lot of the episodes…

 

Thank you for your patience! And as already mentioned, this wouldn't have been possible without Sheila Bliss. I do hope to write more Voltron stuff in the future. Most probably in the Devil's Due version, since I don't really see a lot of stories floating around using it. Again, thank you for reading!

 

Comments, criticisms, sacrificial offerings to the muses… to ina_chan[at]yahoo[dot]com