Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction / Yami No Matsuei Fan Fiction ❯ Black Velvet ❯ Southern Discomfort ( Chapter 1 )

 

 

Schuldig sat in the pirogue slathered in sunscreen, spritzing himself with insect repellent every two seconds and wearing an unutterably hideous fuchsia hat that clashed so badly with his hair it was painful to look at. He was watching Crawford pole the boat though the narrow marsh inlets as though he had done it a thousand times before. Okay so maybe he wasn't watching Crawford's hands, he was watching his ass. For a damn good reason.

 

The moment they had arrived in Louisiana, Crawford had exchanged the crisp Armani suit he always wore for a simple cotton button up and jeans. Dear gods, jeans! Nothing in the known universe could have prepared Schuldig for the sight of Bradley Crawford in a pair of jeans. There was one hell of a body underneath those suits. All the blood in Schuldig's brain had vacated for points south of his waist as Crawford had leaned slightly over the counter of the convenience store they had stopped at, talking to the man behind the counter in rapid French. Since when did Crawford know French that wasn't the uptight prissy French they'd all been taught in school?

 

“Brad,” Schuldig said mischievously.

 

Crawford sighed and rolled his eyes. Glancing over his shoulder he asked warily, “Yes, Schuldig?”

 

Schuldig smirked and said, “I'll give you my pay for an entire month if you wear jeans the whole time we're down here.”

 

“Oh, hell, I'll double it if you do,” Star said from the other boat. “That is the most fabulous ass I have ever seen in a pair of jeans.”

 

“Will you two please leave him alone and let him pole the boat,” Skye said irritably. She looked over her shoulder at Crawford and gave him an apologetic shrug.

 

“Too bad he doesn't like women,” Star said. “I can think of something he can pole.”

 

Schuldig watched in amazement as the back of Crawford's neck turned red. He was fairly certain it wasn't due to sunburn.

 

“Balinese,” Crawford said calmly. “If you like your hand attached to your arm, I suggest you keep it in the boat.”

 

“Why?” Yohji asked, lounging back in the boat and flicking water at Aya.

 

“Alligators.”

 

Yohji snatched his hand back into the boat so fast that he accidentally splashed Aya more than he had intended. Aya glared at him and adjusted his own, only slightly less atrocious, wide brimmed hat. He and Yohji peered over the edge of the boat at the dozen or so alligators flanking and trailing behind the boats.

 

“Why are there so many of them?” Aya asked.

 

“Beats the hell out of me. Usually just Old Hector follows us home,” Star said.

 

“Which one is Old Hector?” Yohji asked nervously.

 

“The one bigger than the boat,” Skye said, pointing out a massive alligator who's body alone was bigger than the boats. “Can always tell it's him because he's the biggest one around here and he's missing one eye.”

 

Yohji shuddered delicately and continued to stare wide eyed at the scaly bodies gliding through the water beside and behind them.

 

“Don't worry, as long as you keep in the boat you're fine,” Crawford said.

 

“How much longer before we arrive?” Aya asked.

 

“Couple more turns,” Star said.

 

“Couldn't you two have just blipped us all here?” Schuldig whined, swatting at a mosquito the size of a small country.

 

“It would have been bad manners, Schuldig. Even though it's technically their home and their family still lives there; to show up unannounced and bringing others would have been rude,” Crawford answered.

 

“Why the hell is it in the middle of the damn swamp?”

 

“It wasn't originally,” Skye explained. “Daddy had several acres of swamp drained and the house built. The swamp has slowly taken back over through the years. I imagine it will eventually reclaim the house as well.”

 

Schuldig frowned slightly as something occurred to him. “Brad, how do you know where we're going? Skye and Star haven't been directing us and Star is behind us so you can't be following her.”

 

“Why do you ask? You know I see things,” Crawford said.

 

“I didn't think that included directions,” Schuldig answered.

 

“Cool. Almost home,” Star said.

 

The boats rounded a turn and a grand mansion came into view through the trees and hanging Spanish moss. As they docked, people began to pour out of the front door and head toward them. Shouts of Tante and Grand-mere were discernable through the excited babble of French and English.

 

“Looks like we're expected,” Star said, grinning as she helped Aya and Yohji out of the boat.

 

“It would seem so,” Skye said, tying off the boat. She and Star were swarmed by at least a dozen children, all clamoring for their attention.

 

“Enfants!” came a command from the porch of the house.

 

Every child went instantly still. Oddly enough, so did Crawford, who recovered almost immediately but not before Schuldig noticed and openly stared at him. Crawford reached to push up his glasses and then remembered he wasn't wearing them. He'd traded them for his contacts because the humidity kept steaming them up.

 

“They are aware as to who you really are, correct?” Aya asked, looking at the happy little faces surrounding them all.

 

“As far as we know, yes,” Skye said.

 

“And they aren't afraid of you?” he asked.

 

The oldest of the children spoke up at that. She looked to be about ten. “Here, we understand the dead walk and talk sometimes,” she said with a shrug as though that closed the matter.

 

Skye laughed. “With Granny `Po around, how could you not understand it.”

 

The girl nodded. “Yeah, but you knew the real Granny `Po.”

 

“Probably not,” Star said. “As far as we know there's always been one around here.”

 

“How is that possible?” Aya asked.

 

“Kind of a Marie LeVeau thing. A daughter takes over from her mother and so on and so forth. Kind of the family business if you will,” Star said, motioning everyone forward toward the house.

 

Schuldig tagged along behind Crawford as the group made their way up the slightly sloping lawn to the house. If he had found Oracle the ice king attractive it didn't begin to compare to the image Schuldig was certain would be burned into his memory until the day he died. Crawford with his hair damp and curling along the nape of his neck, glasses off, shirt sleeves rolled to the elbow and dear gods that ass in a pair of jeans. In fact, Schuldig nearly ran into him when Crawford stopped because he had been staring at his ass.

 

“Schuldig, what is wrong with you today?

 

“Can I help it if you look even more fuckable than usual?”

 

Crawford was saved from the need to comment by the old woman on the porch who was glaring her displeasure at Schuldig.

 

“Bebe, you will watch your language. There are children present at the moment.”

 

To everyone's astonishment, including his own, Schuldig backed up a couple of steps and uttered a faint, “Yes, ma'am.”

 

“Enfants, go along, now,” the woman said. “The grown ups have business to attend.”

 

A disappointed chorus of “Awwws!” seemed to echo around the group. The children disbanded and made various paths away from the adults. But not before giving Star and Skye brief hugs around the waist or legs. Afterward, Star and Skye made their way onto the porch and hugged the older woman. After conversing for a few minutes the woman turned her attention to the men with them. Her gaze immediately centering on Crawford as she beckoned to him imperiously.

 

Crawford made his way up the steps, taking the proffered hand and kissing it. “Always an honor, Madame Belle.”

 

The woman snorted and pinned him with a hard stare. “Bout time you found your way home, enfant.”