Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ Calico ❯ Chapter Seven: The song that a caged bird sings ( Chapter 7 )

Calico

By: Banshee Puppet

Part Seven: The Song that a Caged Bird Sings

**********

"Aya-kun and Ran-chan are working together!" one of the girls squealed. "Today will be good!"

Aya-chan rolled her eyes at hearing that as she approached the shop with Sakura. The two girls were practically inseparable now that they were living together.

"I can't believe I used to be like that, I'm so embarrassed," Sakura told her friend as they worked their way through the crowd. The boys' shift would be over soon, and they had all decided to go do something together. The girls decided on a picnic. After all, it was spring and the day was gorgeous.

"I'm glad that whatever was bothering them is over now," Aya-chan said. "I didn't like seeing them fight. But I think you know what's going on and don't want to tell me!" she scolded.

"I think you should hear from your brother though!" Sakura defended.

It was at that moment that Aya-chan made it through the crowd and gasped slightly to see the state of the shop and its employees.

Yohji was yawning, going over orders and flirting with fan girls, the few who weren't obsessing over his co-workers. Aya, well, Aya was teaching Ran some of the finer points of floral arrangement, though it seemed to just be an excuse to be closer to the other boy. He stood behind him, left hand resting on his hip as he pointed at things with his right hand and whispered instructions in the boy's ear. Ran just did as he was told, paying the body pressed up against his back little mind, but not particularly seeming to mind the fact that it was there. He looked up over his shoulder and asked Aya a question about the hyacinths at a normal decibal, unlike Aya's odd whispering, and Aya took the opportunity to steal a small kiss.

"Aya!" Ran protested, blushing furiously, and the look on his face seemed to say, 'you're totally shameless!'

Aya just looked at him vaguely, the tiniest hint of a smirk pulling at his lips, and answered his question as if nothing had just happened.

Aya-chan just gaped. So that was it! Geez. She would have never thought. But her big brother looked so content. He never smiled anymore, but he almost had, just now, and Toshi-kun didn't seem to mind being kissed by a guy as much as being kissed in front of a bunch of fan girls. Hell, Aya-chan would have been embarrassed too. She didn't know what to do right away and the Koneko was exceptionally busy right now. Ken emerged from the back room, still tying his apron as he announced, "Three o'clock guys. Don't make your sister wait too long, Aya."

Aya looked up to find Aya-chan and Sakura standing not five feet away. His eyes widened slightly. That isn't how he intended to tell Aya that he'd fallen in love with Ran and that Ran seemed to be fine with that.

After an awkward moment, Aya-chan just made a v-sign with her fingers and grinned at him. "Are you two almost ready to go, big brother?" she asked.

"Uh...yeah," he replied. Okay, now he was embarrassed. Kissing his boyfriend in front of customers was one thing, in front of his sister was totally different. Yeah, Aya figured he could call Ran his boyfriend, since he'd finally gotten the smaller boy to stop going out with the girls who hung around the shop. It turns out he never really kissed any of them anyway. He just went and did stuff with them. His "dates" were more like going out with friends, so they stopped calling them dates. He still went out to the arcade with a girl sometimes, because Aya didn't like video games (actually, he didn't like losing, and he was terrible at video games, so, heh, 'nuff said), but Aya took the place of the girls who would go to see movies with him, and they went out to the diner together sometimes. The more he got to know the boy, the more deeply he fell for him. He was a little goofy, but very cute. Ran had an annoying habit of making bubbles in his water by blowing into his straw, but it was strangely endearing. And he bit his nails when he was thinking, and he had an obsession with his hair almost as bad as Yohji's. Everyone knew it was dyed, but he still insisted on getting it re-done as soon as even the smallest amount of roots started to peek through.

"You should have called me and told me!" Aya-chan protested, frowning up at her brother as Ran took off his apron and grabbed their jackets.

"You're working every time I call," Aya stated blandly.

"Oh, and when was the last time you called?" she demanded with a pout, trying to prove the point that he hasn't called in ages.

"Two weeks ago. Sakura had to help me pick out a shirt over the phone," he stated dryly as if saying, 'see! I call!'

"First date," Sakura smirked knowingly. "They went to the new amusement park together."

"Ooo! Did you go on the ferris wheel?" Aya-chan teased in that 'yes, I know what goes on on a ferris wheel' kind of way.

"Of course," Aya replied in that 'don't blame me if you get mental images, you're the one who asked,' sort of way. "But I wanted to kill those stupid people who kept saying bad things," he admitted, something he would never say to Ran. The other boy would just worry, most likely. Aya wasn't ashamed, not even the slightest bit, and he didn't want Ran to think otherwise.

"Oh…big brother…" Aya-chan trailed off. She'd taken to calling him big brother all the time, since she couldn't get used to calling him Aya, and calling him Ran was too confusing now that Ran was around.

"It's not disgusting," Aya stated as if it was the most obvious conclusion in the world, and there was a hint of stubbornness in his tone. "When you love someone, it's never disgusting, no matter who it is, right?"

It was only Aya-chan and Sakura who he would talk to so openly, and Sakura only because they had been through a lot together, and because she was always with his sister anyway. These were the people who were permitted to see his softer side.

"No, Aya, it's not disgusting at all," Sakura agreed softly.

Aya-chan looked a little stunned at first. He hoped she wasn't ashamed of him. She had just found out that her big brother had a boyfriend, after all.

"So, my big brother has finally fallen in love?" she finally asked. "I didn't think I'd ever see the day," she giggled slightly. It was just fine with her. Aya was relieved. He released the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding.

"Yeah," he answered. "I love him. It's definitely love. I wasn't sure at first. I thought it was because he reminded me of someone and I was confused, but…Ran is the person I fell in love with. He's the one who makes my chest feel…full when I think about him. The person that I thought he reminded me of…thinking about her just makes me sad. When I realized that, everything else became obvious."

~**~

'Thinking about her just makes me sad. When I realized that, everything else became obvious.'

She hadn't meant to overhear, she'd been coming downstairs with Aya's jacket as she slipped into her own, an army-style cargo jacket, at the top of the stairwell. For a moment, she forgot to breathe at those words. 'Oh Aya, damnit. You don't even realize, that the person you love, is a lie. I'd thought…I had hoped, that what you fell in love with was…I thought, just maybe, you'd fallen for me, like you could see through all of this somehow, and the person you wanted, was me…but…you love Ran.'

She leaned back against the wall and covered her face with her hand. "I'm such an idiot," she whispered to herself. "How pathetic."

"Ran?"

She jumped slightly. "Ah, Omi, 'sup?" she asked.

"Are you okay?" he asked. "You look sorta…um…" Omi fiddled a bit. It wasn't any of his business, but, Ran was a partner, and a friend. "troubled?" he asked.

"Ah, not at all! I was just trying to remember if I forgot anything!" she covered quickly. "Well, mustn't keep them waiting! Who knows what horror stories Aya is telling his sister about me now. Haha. See ya later. And don't keep Yohji waiting too long, 'kay? I think he wants a smoke break. Or to go 'vomit at the cuteness' of it all. Aya was…cuddly again today. Bye bye!" With the quick excuse, Ran hurried down the stairs, taking three steps at a time and making enough noise so that his presence would not be a surprise.

"Sorry!" he announced. "Couldn't find my jacket."

"It was in the same place as always," Aya looked at him like he was daft.

"Haha, yeah, it was. And here I went to all the trouble of trying to change my system, only to find that you've been cleaning up after me again! Ready to go?"

"…and you sounded funny, before," Omi said aloud to the no longer present assassin. You're voice was different." He sighed. "Are you sick, or something, Ran?"

~**~

"Stop lookin' at me like that! I'm not gonna sprout another head you know!" Ran protested.

Aya had just gone off to get everyone ice cream, since Aya-chan said she wanted some, and then Ran said ice cream sounded good since it was nice out and…well, Sakura didn't disagree and…well, Aya must be in a good mood, because he was being downright agreeable, except for the attempts at force feeding the smaller boy. Ran just didn't eat much, that was all. It wasn't like he was starving himself or anything. Sheesh.

Aya-chan just grinned at him. "Big brother really likes you!" she giggled.

"Well duh," Ran said, rolling his eyes. "He makes it obvious enough. Stupid guy, he can be a walking, talking migrain sometimes…"

"And other times?" Sakura interjected.

"Other times. Well, other times, he's really freakin' cute," he admitted, sounding a little distraught.

"You like him too then! Yay! I wasn't sure. I mean, you don't push him away much but…it looks like you just sort of tolerate his advances mostly," Aya-chan said in her usual, bold manner.

"Yeah…" he said, then stopped, unable to keep the frown from his face and voice, looked down at the water bottle in his hand. "I like him."

"Don't sound so happy about it," Sakura commented, raising an eyebrow.

"Sorry, it's just…complicated."

~**~

Aya stopped dead when he heard that. "Sorry, it's just…complicated." For a moment, he was brimming with happiness, almost ready to burst out into a random fit of uncharacteristic giggles, but Sakura was right. Ran really didn't sound to happy about liking him back at all. Complicated. He didn't want to spy, really, but…he couldn't help it.

"Explain complicated," Aya-chan ordered in that bubbly way she had.

"It's just…" Ran wondered briefly why it was so easy to talk to two girls he barely knew about his problems, when he couldn't talk to any of the people he spent all his time around. It would make the most sense to talk to Yohji. The green-eyed assassin knew exactly what the problem was, but Ran just…couldn't. "I'm not…and he's…" He sighed. "He says he loves me all the time, but he doesn't know me, not even a little bit. How can you love someone you don't know? I'm not who he thinks I am, that's all. He probably won't like me anymore when he figures it out."

~**~

Aya dwelled on what he overheard, but tried not to be conspicuous. It was obvious that something was bothering him though, and when the girls left, the boys were left to their own devices, alone in the park. They'd finished eating long ago, but didn't seem ready to leave yet.

Aya leaned his back against a tree and pulled Ran up against him, as much as the other boy would allow. It was daring, what he asked next. But if he didn't ask…

This would be the question that would gauge the exact nature of their relationship, that would tell him just how far Ran was willing to commit to him.

"Ran?"

"Hmn?"

"Sing for me?" he asked hopefully.

"Sing?" Ran asked, tensing a bit under Aya's touch. "I've given that up, Aya. I don't sing anymore."

Aya's chest tightened, his heart clenched. That was the answer he had hoped he wouldn't get. He had wanted to hear his voice, because…because Aya had given everything to Ran. He wanted to be with him, always, to have no secrets blocking up the air between them. But how was that possible, when Ran couldn't even give him his voice?

"It's getting cold. Let's go back," Ran said, working his way out of Aya's arms.

Aya stood, but as Ran began to walk, the red-head did nothing, just stared at his retreating back.

"What's wrong?" the smaller man asked.

"I really love you, you know," he said. "All of you. That's why I asked. I thought you would understand that I want to know you better, but you won't let me."

'Want to know you better? What the hell?' Ran thought and his eyes widened, horrified, remembering his own words. "He says he loves me all the time, but he doesn't know me, not even a little bit. How can you love someone you don't know? I'm not who he thinks I am, that's all. He probably won't like me anymore when he figures it out."

"Bastard!" he snapped. "You were spying on me! How dare you!" He was angry. He was really pissed off. "You…you had no right! You don't know anything Aya!"

Before he knew what he was doing, Ran was running, it didn't matter to where, somewhere far away from the man who "loved him". Nothing else mattered right then. 'Idiot. Stupid stupid stupid. Stupid Aya. Stupid man!' he thought as he ran. His legs started to burn, and Aya didn't seem to have decided to chase after him. He stopped when he saw his reflection in a store window. It was an electronics shop, so his reflection was doubled by the black screen of the television beyond the window. "And I'm stupid too, to think that this was a good idea." She sighed. "Taro…I miss you. You promised me that you wouldn't die, you bastard."

It was then that surprise caught her. She hadn't thought that the young boy she saw reflected across the street was anything to worry about. How could she? She had no idea what Nagi looked like, or that he was a member of Schwarz. But she was smart enough to dive when the glass from the window shattered. So many shards of glass. She hadn't been able to protect herself from all of them, and when she looked up, the boy was looking down at her, hands in the pockets of his school uniform (which she realized, at this time of night, was a little odd), and spoke.

"Calico, I presume?"

'Well, shit.' "Depends on who's asking," she said, shoving herself to her feet while chastising herself for being so off her game because of stupid Aya.

The boy cocked his head slightly, and nodded, like he was holding a conversation with someone without words. Well, he'd just shattered a store window by, oh, looking at it funny, she wouldn't put much past him at this point.

"If you'd come with me," he said. "There's no reason this has to get violent."

Ran reached for a dagger that wasn't there. 'Crap.' And speaking of daggers….yikes! Who was the yellow-eyed freak who came out of nowhere anyway!!!!

~**~

"Where is your better half today, Aya?" Manx asked as the red-head came downstairs, looking rather tired.

At the mention though, his posture stiffened noticeably, and he said softly, "Ran…didn't come home last night."

"Why weren't you with him???" Birman demanded.

"What the hell do you care?!" Aya bit back at her.

"Lover's quarrel?" Yohji teased.

Aya glared at him darkly, causing the green-eyed man to raise his hands in surrender. He hadn't actually thought he'd been right. Ran didn't strike him as the type to blow a gasket for no apparent reason. 'Maybe it's PMS,' he thought.

"So what you're telling me is, you and Calico had a fight, so you left the only person on the planet who knows the location of some extremely delicate data run loose around the city when Shwarz has already attacked h-him once," Manx covered the near slip easily by clearing her throat.

Aya suddenly realized the folly of deciding to give his boyfriend some much-needed space instead of chasing after him. His expression dropped ever-so slightly and he turned to leave without saying a word.

"Where is he going now?" Manx grumbled. Honestly, Abyssinian was so…well, she wasn't sure there was one word that could cover it all.

"To look for Calico, obviously," Ken stated as if it were obvious.

"Yeah, relax Manx. Nobody wants that guy back here safe and sound more than Aya does. He's probably beating himself up about what an idiot he is right now, but it's usually when he's berating himself for some supreme idiocy that he does his best work," Omi said cheerfully. "Anyway, you'd better tell us what you've found out about this data, right? Has Ran told you where it is."

Birman sighed and shook her head. "He won't. He insists it's safe, but won't say word one about it's location. We can only guess. But that's not what concerns us, not really."

"Then what…?"

"Calico has a photogenic memory boys," Manx clarified. "If he read that data before hiding it, there's a possibility that they'll try pulling it out of his brain, and we all know that at least one member of Shwarz is capable of just that. Not to mention other possibilities. Of course, we don't know if she's been captured, but Calico is just not this irresponsible, to disappear for a full night without even calling."

Omi's eyes widened, remembering the day before when Calico sounded odd on top of the stairs.

"Repeat what you just said…"

"Calico has a photogenic memory," Manx said, not sure what Omi was getting out.

"No, I mean…you just called Ran a "she", Manx. I…uhm…that is…"

Yohji groaned. This was bound to happen eventually. Manx cursed under her breath. It started to come together in Omi's head slowly, and realization flashed across his eyes.

"What's going on guys?" Ken asked, as lost as ever.

"Calico isn't Taro Takane," Yohji said slowly. If the secret was out, it might as well be out all the way. "It's Rie Takane, his twin sister."

Ken choked. "Ah…uh…"

"Don't tell Aya," Yohji added sternly.

"Whaatt? Why the hell not?!?"

"After all those two have gotten through to get to where they are right now, don't you think Ran should be the one to tell him? Give him a chance, would you?"

"Anyway, we have more important things to deal with just now," Omi intervened.

~**~

"How long have you known?" Birman asked as Yohji was about to ascend the stairs behind his comrades.

"Hm?" he looked at her over the rim of his sunglasses.

"About Calico."

Yohji gave her an uncharacteristically serene smile. "Since the beginning," he answered. "But she's only known that I know since the run-in with Shuldich. Anyway, I figure it the same way Aya does. Rie or Taro…that doesn't matter. To us, it's just Ran. Besides," he grins impishly. "Those macho girls aren't my type! You, on the other hand…"

Birman threw one of the sofa pillows at him. "You're incoragable Balinese!"

"But cute, right?"

"You have work to do!" she huffed, crossing her arms over her chest and sticking her nose in the air. "Men. Honestly."

"Ooooh I see," Yohji teased. "Manx is more your type then. Well, win some lose some!" and he just barely dodged a flying tv remote on his way out.

Manx shook her head and chuckled at Birman's tantrum. Yohji's flirting had always made her uncomfortable, but trying to ignore it never really worked out, so now she threw fits, which only encouraged him to tease her more.

"That guy'll never change. Anyway, we should get to work too. They'll have their hands full with Shwarz, we should get them as much information as we can."

"Right then. Where should we start?"

"I was thinking of looking into the Takane family line."

Birman's eyes widened. "You don't think…"

"Well, they were adopted. All we have is a code name, but it does seem that Calico is connected to the man in some way that goes beyond mere coincidence."

"Alright, well, I guess we've got our work cut out for us."

~**~

Seeing Taro had been bad enough, but she knew that her brother was dead, knew it by the pain in her heart and by everything that she had become because of that death. Seeing her mother had also been trying, but her mother, also was dead. It was when they tried to distract her by making her see people who were still alive that she ran into trouble. It was like they were poking around in her brain and trying to distract her with images of a life she couldn't have, of people saying things they would never say.

"Forget all of this, Ran. I just want you to come with me. Let's leave, together, just the two of us. I'm sorry I made you angry, but you're the one who's running away…"

It was Aya. Aya and Aya and Aya with a side of her foster father, and then more Aya. "You're getting predictable…Schuldich," Calico said, exhaustion thick on her voice.

It took a bit, but she found singing occupied all of her mind, and it seemed to block out his attempts to reach past her own voice in her brain. She only hoped her voice could hold out.

~**~

Schuldich slammed the door and grumbled something about "stupid, tubborn, flat-chested women".

"She's singing again," Crawford stated matter-of-factly.

"No shit," the red-head said, flopping onto the couch. "Why didn't you tell me that bastard was gonna be such a pain in the ass?"

"We have to get the satellite data whether she's a pain or not. If you can't yank the location of the disk out of her head, then we'll have to do it the old-fashioned way."

Farfarello licked the stiletto he'd been playing with.

"Do not kill her, Farfarello. Am I understood?"

Farfarello just gave Crawford a "yeah, whatever," sort of look.

"What's the deal with this data again?" Schuldich asked absently. Torturing tomboys wasn't really his idea of a good time, mostly, and this one just annoyed him, but if Brad said it was important….

"Mostly it's just data that tracks storms across the planet's surface, but this guy, Kodomo, hid research into irregular brain functions in that data."

"Irregular brain patterns?" Nagi asked. Crawford really wasn't giving many details. They were just doing as they were told, really.

"Psychic abilities."

Now Shuldich's eyes widened. "Like us?"

Crawford nodded. "Kodomo wants to make everyone in the world like us. Obviously, we can't allow that to happen. Farfarello, let's go question the girl."

Schuldich looked at Nagi, and after a pause, Nagi nodded. "You're right. If we want to prevent this, killing her would be the most obvious choice. He's hiding something."

"So…let's find out what then."

"You can't be serious! You can't!"

"Relax kiddo. I'm not going to poke around in his head. I was just thinking that I want to go pick on Weiss some more."

Nagi's eyes widened in realization. "I'm coming with you."

~**~

Abyssinan's--no, Aya's--mind was an open book, and the only thing on it was Ran, and the fact that he'd 'kill anyone who lays a finger on my boyfriend'.

Honestly, if it wasn't so damn hilarious that the sword-toting assassin had a female boyfriend, the assassin's protective streak would be enough to make Schuldich sick.

"You really are totally clueless, aren't you?"

Aya glared. Yeah, well, he was good at glaring.

"Uh, Schuldich, it's obvious he wants to rip your throat out, maybe you shouldn't encourage him…" Nagi said nervously. This was a first for them. The, well, you know, talking to a member of Weiss and not trying to kill them. He pushed down the little voice in his head that reminded him that Crawford probably knew they were here, and why, and…

"Bastard had it coming for keepin' secrets from us."

"Huh?" Nagi blinked and found Schuldich staring at him, frowning slightly. Then the red-head smirked and said. "Stop thinking so loud, can't you see I'm trying to be intimidating here?"

"You might do better with that if Abyssinian's hands weren't wrapped around your throat," Nagi sighed. This was going nowhere fast. "Abysinnian, before you kill Schuldich, can we possibly explain what we're doing here…all alone, without any weapons…"

"You count as a weapon, kid," Yohji said past the cigarette that was drooping from his lips. Nagi couldn't really argue that point.

"You want your friend back, don't you?" Schuldich sneered.

Aya was back to glaring. Well, it was better than strangling at least, wasn't it? And Nagi wasn't helping, and damn, Schuldich could take care of himself, but if he used his 'mind tricks' on Abysinnian now, then they definitely wouldn't trust them enough to share their information…

"What exactly is it that you two want?" Omi said finally. Ah, the voice of reason, too bad he was also the most naïve of the group.

"Information," Nagi said flatly.

"Brad is keeping secrets. I don't like it," Schuldich said. "Can you let go of my throat now? If I'm lying you can kill me later, or try to…"

That was logical, sort of. Aya let go.

Schuldich dusted his sleeves with the backs of his hands and then spoke. "I take it the name Kodomo means something to you? Well, I learned something interesting today. I'll tell you more, but in return, I want to know exactly what the information on this disk is all about. Because if it's what Brad says, then our problems would be solved by just killing the kitten, and yet…" he trailed off smirking. "Seems as though a lot of people want what Calico has, and we want to know why."

"Sucks for you, because all we know is that whatever it is, Calico isn't spilling to anyone, not even us," Ken bit out. "He won't tell us where it is, so just back off."

"I don't think you get it," Schuldich eyed him critically. "There are much nastier ways to pull information out of a person's head then what I can do you know. And from what I can tell, there's a lot up in that brain to pull, if the bastard would just stop singing."

Aya's eyes widened. "Don't lie. He doesn't sing anymore."

"Must've changed his mind," Schuldich said in an off-hand manner. "Well then, if you're not going to tell me what I want to know, then I guess I'll be going."

Aya's fists clenched tightly at his sides as Schuldich turned to leave. He grabbed the telepath's shoulder roughly. "It's a plague," he grit out.

Schuldich's eyes widened, and so did the eyes of the rest of the Weiss members. Aya couldn't believe it took him something like this to remember. It had been an offhand comment. It had disturbed him at the time, but, then again, it was just the sort of thing that Ran would say to make a point, or to provoke a reaction. He remembered now, he didn't even try to shield the memory from Schuldich.

"…because, there isn't anyone in the whole world who's exactly like me, Aya. Don't pretend to understand. If you put everything all together, no two people are exactly alike. Not even twins. But there are people who are similar enough to get along without much trouble. That's what friendship is, I guess."

"What are you getting at this time? I just want to know what's so important about this data you're hiding."

Ran sighed. "If you could make everyone in the world just like you, would you do it, even if it meant a lot of people would be hurt, or maybe even killed? I thought about that a lot, and I've only been able to come up with one answer…" He paused. "A world where everyone's the same…even if I have to spend my life just like this, even with this pain in my heart, I won't allow it. It sounds really boring."

"You've started babbling again."

"Sorry. I'm hungry. Let's go eat."

"Anyway, what you're saying is impossible. Nobody would want something like that."

Ran just shrugged absently. "Hitler did."

Schuldich choked on the last turn of phrase that passed through his mind. What the hell was Brad thinking?!!!? "They're not trying to turn everyone in the world into a person…like us…" his eyes grazed over Nagi. "They're trying to kill all the people who aren't. I may be a self-serving asshole at times, if I'm to go by your opinion of me," he said, looking at Aya, who had let him go. "But even I have my limits. I won't help out with genocide."

"So tell us where Calico is then," Yohji demanded exhaustively.

"I'll take you there. But you should know, Kodomo…the person who goes by that name, is your friend's father."

Aya's fist clenched tightly. "Then that's all the more reason to kill him," Aya bit out. He remembered what Ran had told him about the way he was born. He was born, because his mother was raped. At the looks he was getting from his teammates he snarled out the words, "Don't look at me like that. Ran would definitely agree with me. Now that he's got something the guy wants, now he matters? Ran isn't like us. From the day he was born, he was a child that nobody wanted, and I won't ever forgive anyone who hurts him."

His anger was flaring, his mind spinning. Schuldich couldn't block the swirling thoughts therein. Memories of rape, attempted murder, loneliness, despair, and underneath it all, the dull glimmer of love, the desire to bring enough happiness to destroy the pain. As Aya brushed past him with a gruff "let's go", Shuldich had to catch himself against the wall. He could control his abilities but…such strong emotion. It was too much.

"Schuldich?" Nagi asked, concerned. Schuldich shook his head to clear it of the ache and the resonance of Aya's emotions.

"So that's love, huh?" he grumbled. "Hurts like hell."