Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ Colours of my Life ❯ Feelings Within ( Chapter 1 )

Title: Colours of my life

Author: Sardius

Category: Angst/Romance

Warnings: R for now (maybe NC-17 later)

Pairing: Yohji/Aya(Ran)

Disclaimer: I don't own Weiss Kreuz, it belongs to its creator and company. (sobs) if only they were mine! .sniff sniff

Author's Note: Thankyou so much for everyone that has reviewed my work. I'm very flattered! I didn't expect people to read it so I was very grateful when people reviewed me. I hope I haven't ruined this further. I'm just making it up as I go along. Err I'm trying to lead the fic up to the real reason why Aya got injured and of course his relationship between Yohji before and after the incident. So please be patient. English is not my first language so I'm not very good at expressing words. Gomen ~~~ onto the fic!.

Chapter One: Feelings Within

I've never appreciates your closeness
Whenever you are near
I always hide my emotion
Because you make me feel
But now I long for your touch
Is it so hard to love?
Whenever you are near
The colours appear
Through my eyes
I reached
I see

Fujimiya Ran

~Three Months ago~

I am beginning to realised my life is getting more pointless each day. I get up, dressed, work, kill, and sleep. And each night I would look back at the days when my life was like a childhood fantasy. Ever since my parents were killed and my imouto was left in a coma, I knew my life would never be the same. I wanted to kill the man that destroyed all my happiness, my hopes, my dreams. And so I have lived the rest of my life to seek out revenge. Kinda stupid, don't you think? Killing in the name of my imouto. Does she even know how I have shamed her name? Me her brother, sweet innocent Ran, killing as an assassin, a murderer, staining my hands with blood….

A knock disrupts my thoughts. I eased writing and place them in my drawers. I guess I can finish it later.

"Aya! You in there?"

The knock became insistent. I strode across my room and yanked the door open with such force; it almost hit the wall.

"What?" I asked irritably

Yohji leans against the hallway dressing as usual in his tight fitting jeans and sleeveless shirt with his honey blonde hair tied back. He grins at me and lets his eyes travel down and up to my face again. Sometimes I wonder if he can just leave me alone. Ever since I have joined Weiss, he has never once stop irritating me. He always stares at me whenever he thinks I don't notice. It's unsettling. And I don't understand why he keeps doing that. If I can ever get the answer out of him I would.

He looks at me for a long time, like he is starring into my soul. Finally he said

"Hey Aya, Ken said he have soccer practice with the kids today and Omi is at school so you're stuck me this afternoon."

"Hn…"

I stormed pass him and walk down the hallway intending to finish my afternoon as soon as possible. I know he's behind me, following my every movement, starring into me. God! Why does he always stare at me! What does he want from me?

I turned around quite suddenly he almost bashes his nose into my face.

"What the?! Aya why the hell did you stop? I almost crashed into you!" he cried.

I ignored his comment. I have decided to settle this once and all.

"Why?" I hissed.

He looks at me like I am some idiot showing no hints of understanding what I'm talking about.

"Why what?" he asked

"For God sake Yohji, why the hell….."

"What Aya?" he interrupts

"Never mind."

If he's not going to tell me, then have it his way. If only he could just leave me alone! It's like he wants something from me but afraid to ask. Hell, if he can't even say it then there's no use arguing about it.

I just wish this afternoon would finish earlier.

* * * * * *

Great. Just great. Why does Ken have to have soccer practice in the first place? Now I have to get stuck working with our cold fearless leader and knowing him, he's probably coped up in that damn room of his as usual. Not that I mind working with him, at least I get to spend the rest of the afternoon doing Aya watching. Now that is something Yohji Kudou don't mind doing.

It's not like I purposely stare at him. I mean I have never met anyone quite like him before. How he handles our savings as if he's an experienced banker, not to mention a guy with bright red hair and deep amethyst eyes which you don't see that around very often. Sometimes during my Aya watching, he tends the roses so delicately, each stem is placed carefully along the table and beautifully put together. And I know there is warmth behind those emotionless eyes, like he's thinking back about his past and how faith has twisted his life. I guess being as assassin, your life is pretty much screwed up anyway.

By the time I got to Aya's bedroom, I thought I might as well get this over with. Either having a katana running through my heart is better than a horde of schoolgirls swamping over me. Yeah that's what I said. Even the great Yohji Kudou can find the schoolgirls irritating.

"Aya! Open up! It's Yohji" I banged on the door. Who says I have to ask politely? Either way he's gonna act the same.

No answer. Gee does he really hate me that much.

"Aya! You in there?" I shouted again.

Suddenly the door is swang wide open and I am greeted with a very annoyed Aya glaring straight at me. Told you he'll act the same.

For once he is not wearing his goddamn orange sweater but a loose green shirt and black jeans. God, he's beautiful. Does he even know how beautiful he looks? Probably not. He probably doesn't even know the meaning of sex since he's too coped up in his revenge for Takatori. But man this guy is just so cold. If only he'll just warm up a bit when he's around me. I don't even have to realise to see the pain drifting in his eyes every time I look into them deeply. So much pain. I wish I could take it all away. I wonder what the hell happened to him to make him this way.

"What?" I was brought back to reality and damn, Aya caught me watching him again. Okay think quick Kudou, say anything to distract him.

"Hey Aya, Ken said he'll have soccer practice with the kids today and Omi is at school so you're stuck with me this afternoon."

"Hn", the redhead replied and stormed passed me. Phew! That was a close call Kudou! Better watch yourself next time. Oh shut up! I told my inner self. I'll just have to be more careful doing my Aya's watching this afternoon.

Aya continues to ignore me and strode down the hall. The way he moves so silently and gracefully, you would think he was raised as an assassin. Suddenly he stops, spun around and glares at me. Shit! He's pissed. I know because emotions would flare across his eyes that would send anyone running. Well not everyone. I'm not running yet am I?

"Why?" he hissed at me. Oh crap. He's gonna be asking me why I'm looking at him all the time. Okay Kudou time to put your acting skills together. Just play innocent.

"What Aya?" I asked innocently. Right, act confuse that would put him off. Fuck! He's giving me one of his death glares now. Another tactic… think, think, think.

"Nevermind." He spats. With that he began his walk down the hall again. Thank god I'm still alive!

This is going to be an interesting afternoon.

* * * * * *

The afternoon was busy as usual with schoolgirls crowding around the place. Aya stood behind the cash register giving his famous speech, "If you're not getting anything then leave!" But that didn't even work, instead more girls seem to crowd around Aya giving him smiles and giggles when he scowl even more deeply.

Yohji ended up hanging around the shop, firting and talking with the girls, getting names and phone numbers down and occasionally looking sideways at the redhead to see how he's keeping up.

Finally the mad afternoon rush ended and Aya was left sweeping the floor and clearing out pots with Yohji lingering behind the counter.

* * * * * *

And to think I was going to be left alone this afternoon. Instead I have to take over Ken's shift and have Yohji glancing at me every few second is not what I've intended to have in mind. Not only do I have to put up with those girls everyday but they remind me too much of Aya and I. Its just….. reminds me the days when she would smile at me and gives me one of her pout whenever she wanted something. Of course I would usually give in to her and we ended up talking and laughing as we walked home…..

But that is all in the past now.

Yohji is watching me again. He probably thinks I don't notice him while I'm busy arranging the pots around me but how can anyone not know when someone stares at your back the whole day. And the most annoying thing is I don't even understand why he's doing it. What does he sees in me that others don't? Its not like I paid attention to him anyway. Does he thinks he can help me and bring back the old Ran when I have stopped anyone cracking the ice I have built so strongly around me a long time ago. What does he expect me to do? Put my arms around him and cry my eyes out and tell him everything about my past. Then he'll whisper back words of encouragement and everything would be all right again. Is that what he wanted?

Instead of ignoring him and heading back to my room I have decided to confront him. Better push him away now then let him get closer to me. I can't have anyone doing that. Nothing can stop me now when I will seek revenge for my family. Not even him.

"Look Yohji could you stop it" I've decided to give him sometime to register what I've just said. His eyes widen for a moment but it is quickly recovered with a smirk on his face.

"Aya what's with you this afternoon? I haven't done anything to you", he said while he shovels around the counter looking for some where to stare at rather than me.

Too bad Yohji. Either we get this sorted out or never.

"God damn it Yohji! Why the hell do you always stare at me?! Every time I'm around you just look at me like your expecting me to do something! Why won't you just leave me alone?!" I practically shouted at him.

He stood there starring at me, most probably thinking that's the most I have spoken to him since I've joined Weiss. Then he lowers his head and spoken in such a whisper I had to lean forward to catch it.

"...I can't"

I stopped breathing. God Yohji…..Don't do this to me. Make him hate me…that's right…push him away….push him away. Instead I found myself whispering back to him.

"Why?" I pleaded.

He looks up at me then, his entire facade is dropped and for the first time since I joined Weiss Jade met amethyst. He reaches out and brushes my bangs out of my eyes and I know this time it is the answer I feared and longed for.

"Because I care"

With that he turned around and stomp up the stairs leaving me alone with my own thoughts.

* * * * * *

~TBC~ (Hopefully…….)

Ummm…..how was that? (Looks around nervously) I hope I made it long enough this time. :P I hope it was not boring and stuff, I was trying to make it as interesting as I can. Please review me! PLEASE! Cos then I know that you people still want me to continue it. Or you can email me at reskiau@yahoo.com.au Many thanks and happy reading for those off to read other fics (smiles) Ja!