Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ Discord in the House of Assassins ❯ The Play is the Thing ( Chapter 10 )

The Play's the Thing

 

Necessity is the mother of Invention, they say. And so, in the face of such a necessity as a less than adequate assassin team (with one of them injured) on the brink of possibly facing two of their supernaturally-gifted arch enemies in tip-top shape (and when were they ever not?), Aya invented a sentence never before thought possible (to be uttered by said stoic redhead) by a surprised Yohji.

 

“Let's run away. Fast.”

 

Aya maneuvered himself and his injured leg as expertly as he could without making the shrubbery move unnaturally nor the grass and the dead leaves make too much noise to give him and Yohji away. Speaking of whom, the blond assassin sat there, stupefied, mouth slightly agape and eyebrows raised expectantly as he stared at Aya. The redhead couldn't keep out the hiss from his whisper.

 

“What?”

 

“I'm waiting for the punch line… `coz what you said, that was a joke, wasn't it? I mean you… actually want us to r-u-n a-w-a-y… there must be a punch line…”

 

Never one to be unnerved, but interestingly always one to be easily annoyed, Aya displayed both contradicting traits simultaneously by looking deadpan as he raised a very convincing “this-is-not-a-joke” fist right in front of Yohji's beloved face (well, he loves it to stay un-bruised for a long period of time thank you very much).

 

“Move or I'll give you your punch line.”

 

Raising a hand in the universal gesture of “sheesh you really don't take jokes that well do you?”, Yohji turned and crawled on all fours, looking over his shoulder now and then to check up on a very upset Aya and over his other shoulder for any signs of possible Schwarz-initiated conflict. So far so good, and the end of the shrubbery and the pavement to freedom looks so close that Yohji could almost hear the familiar childhood song (OooOooh, weee'rrrreeeeeeoooouuuffffffff To see the Wizard! ThewonderfulwizardofOz. Bcozbcozbcozbcozbcooooooooz!) When a sound denoting the oncoming of evil* froze him dead on his all-four tracks. The sound consisted of a kind of whine, a kind of nasal, and a kind of smart-alecky voice.

 

“Aww, come over here Be and take a gander at the cute little kitties I found behind the shrubs.”

 

“Bugger this for a fuck!” Yohji hissed, as he got to his feet as quickly as he can. There's no way him and an injured Aya, no matter that it's A-I'm an assassin god-YA, could get away now. Not with the way that Berserker seems to be eyeing the two of them while juggling those menacingly sharp daggers. Yohji visibly flinched when the albino licked one of the daggers, smiled, and said as a matter of fact how God really fucken' cries `es all-seeing eye out whenever one of `es pretty little kitties gets exceedingly hurt.

 

* * * * * * *

 

“So you're telling me… that they're having a `tiff'?”

 

Omi nodded sagely, just like the wise old man in a classic kung-fu movie he saw last night**. Sitting in the kitchen, Omi with a closed laptop before him and Ken straddling a chair turned the other way around and arms resting on it's back (which is now in front…***), looking at the youngest assassin as if he just declared that the end of the world was a minute and 43 seconds away, and by the way, the real David Beckham was captured and replaced with a government issued robot with a more luxuriant hair^. After a while, when Omi didn't look as if he'll recant anytime, Ken gave a tired sigh like he would when he had to explain to some of the kids down at the park that the goal of the game soccer is to kick the ball and not the opponent.

 

“Omi… I know I'm not as smart as you, and I really didn't get that far with my studies, and that you guys see me sometimes as a dumb jock, but to say that Aya and Yohji had a “tiff” is to suggest that they have a relationship beyond just a professional one. You know, it's like saying that… I don't know, a snake and a mongoose get along really well but sometimes they just get into a friendly spat resulting in the death of either one.”

 

“But Ken-kun they ARE friends.”

 

“Aya… friends… with Yo-tan?” If Ken's left eyebrow got any higher it would have been already part of his hairline. Disregarding the overreacting eyebrow, Omi smiled and nodded.

 

“Omi… you're not Omi are you? Who are you and who sent you?!”

 

The youth rolled his eyes and crossed his arms in front of his chest, leaned back and pouted, a complicated set of gestures that teens often do to make their elders feel all the more older. “Ken-kun, where have you been? They're actually already the best of friends!”

 

Silence, and then Ken bolts out of the chair, storming across the rooms towards the mission room.

 

“Ken-kun, where are you going?”

 

“Sit down there whoever you are I'm going to call Manx and she's going to call the Magic Bus hospital and then you'll be all fixed and back to good old Omi my god what happened here I'm such a stupid teammate how could I have let this happen to poor little Omittchi …”

 

“No-ooo!!!” The young assassin shouted as he shot through the rooms to stop the older assassin.

 

* * * * * * *

 

It was, if anything, a false alarm. Yohji calmly guided a seething Aya before the man did anything stupid. They got away with their heads still above their shoulders, but that doesn't mean they're off the hook.

 

“Why are we going back at the Ko… at HQ? Have you been taking more stupid pills than usual? Schwarz can follow us!” Aya, two cents short of a hissy fit, berated Yohji as they walked the maze of streets leading towards the undisclosed “flower shop” they worked at. Clearly, the man was too upset to think clearly, Aya has a very vengeful outlook on life (recall the urban legend about exacting vengeance from a bottle of ketchup) and never gives up a chance to get back at any person, indeed anything that wronged him. The redhead's fists were shaking earlier as he reigned in the urge to fly at the smirking Mastermind and the psycho as usual Berserker screaming “Shi-ne!” for all of the people in the park to see^^, his injured left leg practically throbbing for vengeance. Instead of reacting like Yohji, the blonde reacted as Balinese, calm and calculating, patient for the right chance and angle to aim his weapon of choice.

 

“Abyssinian, you're belittling Schwarz. If they know when and where to wait for us at the park, then they already know where we live. They won't follow. I'm sure of that.”

 

Aya scowled and trained a class A glare at the older man. “And how did you know that, pray tell?”

 

“Because they don't need to, they already know where to find us. And because they're not after you or me Aya, they're after the V-Man.”

 

“But you're the V-Man.”

 

“No. He's this other thing inside my head. He's…” Yohji paused as he first shuffled Aya into and he quickly ducked into the alley behind their building, getting into their shop through the back door. “…He's some other entity. Didn't you feel the probe? Mastermind was probing our heads. He knew. He knows…”

 

As Aya calmed down with the familiarity of his surroundings, and his left leg's throbbing for vengeance subsided, he looked at Yohji straight in the eye, and found the other man lost in his own thoughts.

 

“He knows what?”

 

“He knows about the V-Man Aya. From the fight last Wednesday night… they left because he couldn't read my, I mean, the V-man's mind. That's why he didn't want to fight; he knew something was up….” Yohji slumped down, back on the counter, getting deeper into his confusing train of thought. Aya sat down beside him, and put on his most calming voice.

 

“What is up?”

 

Yohji sunk his face into his hands, elbows propped on his knees.

 

“Damned if I knew.”