Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ Don't Make Me Kill You ❯ Excessively hot ( Chapter 3 )

As Yoji watched Ken's clumsy technique from across the bar, his thoughts shifted from tentative hope to a white-noise buzz of dull desperation. He was going to have to seduce this woman himself, God damn it, and Aya wasn't going to like it. “My kingdom for a straight, sexy teammate who's over 18,” he grumbled, dragging deeply on his cigarette.

 

“What?” Aya asked distractedly. Probably thinking much the same thing, Yoji suspected.

 

“I just... Jesus Christ, how am I supposed to have any respect for him after this? Did he just spill a drink on her?” Yoji stubbed out his cigarette and tugged at Aya's arm. “Come on, let's go rescue that damsel in distress.”

 

Aya stared at him. “That well-connected mistress of a brutal criminal, you mean. And why do I have to go with you? Just pick her up and get it over with.”

 

“It wouldn't hurt you to see how it's done -- never know when you're going to be called on to romance the ladies, and I think you'd want to put in a better performance than the atrocity we've just witnessed.”

 

Eyes narrowed dangerously, Aya hissed, “I've never spilt a drink on anyone in my life. Unless I wanted to,” he added, making significant eye contact.

 

“You spilling a drink on me is pretty much the very least of my worries, Mr. Death-Stalks-Among-Us. Look, Ken's got her pissed off, and I figured the two of us should be enough to dazzle anyone out of a funk. You can leave in a few minutes. Just come on, before she decides to swear off men altogether.”

 

Yoji smoothly sent Ken packing, giving his teammate one last, wondering look as he retreated toward the bar. Turning to their target for the evening, Yojii smiled sympathetically. “I saw what was happening and got over here as fast as I could. I'm sorry you had to be subjected to that -- some people just can't tell when they're playing out of their league.” Yoji increased the voltage of his smile to dazzling. “Speaking for men everywhere, I hope you'll give me a chance to make it up to you. I'm Yoji, and this is my friend, uh...” He used the moment's hesitation to drag Aya closer to the table. “Ryuu. My friend Ryuu,” he said, now trying to be even more appealing to make up for the baleful look the redhead was giving him. “And you, Miss...?”

 

She hesitated briefly, but finally smiled. “Nakata.”

 

As if he didn't know. Yoji had worked plenty hard the other night, getting Hiro Yamata's last girlfriend to give him the name of the new mistress -- along with the bonus tip that Miss Nakata and her old man were already on the rocks.

 

“Very pleased to meet you, Miss Nakata. May we join you?”

 

She nodded. Yoji grabbed Aya's arm and pulled him down onto a stool; it looked like he was going to bolt. Aya graced him with a glare that was breathtaking in its intensity. Yoji paused just a moment to admire it -- Rei Nakata was a beautiful woman, but nobody held a candle to Aya.

 

“That one,” she said, gesturing vaguely in the direction Ken had retreated, “he was a nice guy, I think. Just clumsy,” she added, frowning.

 

“Well, he obviously has good taste in women, at least,” Yoji said. “Speaking of which -- not to be indelicate, but, well -- you couldn't possibly be single. Not that it's any of my business,” he added hastily. “I'm just wondering if I have a chance.” He gave her his most winsome smile and heard Aya make a very unkind remark under his breath.

 

She smiled back -- yes! No matter how taken, no matter how annoyed, no woman could hold out against Yoji Kudoh. “We'll see,” she said coyly.

 

Aya made a noise that sounded as if he were about to cough up a hairball. Looking about wildly for an escape, his eyes finally lit on the lady's cocktail glass, which was empty. Relief evident, Aya motioned to it and asked, “Would you like another?” She smiled. “Yes, thank you. Vodka and tonic.” Aya nodded once and fled as if his shirt were on fire.

 

**********

 

Aya stood at the bar, deliberately positioned in the worst place to get service and conscientiously avoiding eye contact with the bartender, trying to find a few moments to get his thoughts together. Watching Yoji flirt with that woman made him ill. It left a taste in his mouth like a mayonnaise-flavored diet soda. It also made him want to kill someone -- Yoji, to be specific. What a cheesy jerk. Put him in front of a woman and he turns into Neil Diamond, Aya thought to himself. The coked-up `80s version. I used to have better taste in men than this, he thought despairingly. I must have.

 

Alas, Aya never went unnoticed for long at a bar, and he'd procured a round of drinks all too quickly. He needed one himself, and he couldn't think of any way to avoid buying one for Yoji that wouldn't look strange. At least he'd thought to make it gin, which Yoji detested. If the crusty whore wanted something he liked to drink, he could damned well get it himself.

 

When he got back to the table, Aya was unsurprised to see Yoji carrying on an intense conversation with the target's breasts. It's not like they weren't screaming for attention, thrust forward for inspection by some engineering marvel of a push-up bra -- and, Aya reasoned grimly, and Yoji did aim to please. “Her face is up there,” he said, putting the drinks down on the table and accidentally splashing Yoji a little. That was childish, he thought to himself. But satisfying.

 

Yoji's smile took on a forced quality. “Gin. You shouldn't have.”

 

“Oh, it was my pleasure.”

 

Yoji looked down at the table as he fished a cigarette out of the pack and lit it, his measured motions turning the whole thing into some kind of malodorous, cancer-causing tea ceremony. Looking at the target again, he appeared to have regained his equilibrium. “I hadn't noticed at first, but your eyes are the exact shade of...”

 

Aya couldn't bear to find out how that sentence was going to end. “So, what are your hobbies?” he interrupted. “Your interests. Do you read?” Under the table, Yoji kicked him sharply in the ankle.

 

Apparently amused, Miss Nakata went along with the abrupt change in subject. “I just finished `A Wild Sheep Chase,' by Haruki Murakami. He's brilliant -- I love those disappearing women.”

 

“Really? Me too! I mean, that's one of my favorite books. Have you read...”

 

Yoji cleared his throat loudly and gave Aya a look. He turned back to the target. “I'm sorry to interrupt, but I just have to ask -- what perfume are you wearing? It's enthralling.”

 

Enthralling? Where the hell did Yoji come up with this shit? Aya missed the name of the perfume but did notice when she added, “It was a gift from my boyfriend.”

 

“Ah,” Yoji said, smiling sadly. “I knew there had to be a boyfriend. But then again, you are out without him on a Saturday night, so perhaps it isn't serious?”

 

She frowned. “People define `serious' in different ways, I suppose. It's serious enough. It's just that he works all the time. If he isn't actually at work, he's on his damned Blackberry all night, and he doesn't pay attention to a thing I say.”

 

Aya knew the type -- he killed them regularly. “Thumb warrior,” he said disdainfully.

 

Two pairs of eyes stared blankly back at him. He was accustomed to this sort of reaction, of course. It was part of the reason he tried not to talk a lot. “You know, the Blackberry thing,” he said, imitating the intense, two-thumbed scrolling of a high-rolling businessman immersed in his handheld computer. “Thumb warriors.”

 

After a few moments, Yoji said, “Well, Ryuu has to get going in a few minutes.” Turning to Aya, he added, “I'm just going to run to the bathroom for a second before you leave, so wait for me, OK?”

 

Aya nodded mutely. He didn't especially want to be left alone with this woman -- the thought of it tapped a deep vein of existential angst, in fact -- but he supposed he'd just have to buck up.

 

As soon as Yoji was out of earshot, the target leaned across the table. “Ryuu, would it be horribly rude of us to ditch your friend? I'd really love to get to know you better, and he's just kind of... Well, he's a little aggressive, you know? I thought maybe you could take me back to my place?”

 

It was Aya's turn to stare blankly. What the fuck? “Um, Miss Nakata...”

 

“Call me Rei,” she purred seductively.

 

Holy fucking shit. “Well, um... Rei... you're sure you wouldn't rather have Yoji take you home? He's much better at this sort of thing than I am -- I mean, he's charming and everything...”

 

“Oh, you're plenty charming. Unless you're not interested?”

 

Oh, fucking hell. This could not be happening.

 

“Well, we should wait and tell him...”

 

Rei smiled. “Of course. You're really very polite and considerate.”

 

Was she on crack? What the hell was going on? There was no way he could go through with this... No, it was a mission. He had to remain calm -- it was a mission. Must remain calm...

 

Yoji returned to the table. “Ryuu, are you OK? You look a little...”

 

“Um... No. I'm... um... Miss Nakata -- Rei -- has asked me to take her home. So... um... right. We're going to be leaving, then.” Although dazed, Aya couldn't help noticing that the lady in question already had her purse in hand and had walked over to Aya's side of the table. He stood up and, after a moment's indecision, put his hand lightly on the small of her back. Turning to Yoji -- who looked absolutely gobsmacked -- he said, “I'll talk to you... um... later. `Night.” He steered Miss Nakata -- Rei -- toward the door, thinking that he'd have been more insulted by Yoji's expression of utter disbelief if he didn't find the situation so unbelievable himself.

 

**********

 

Ken sat down next to Yoji and set a double whiskey in front of him. “Not really your finest moment, huh, Yoji,” he said, not trying very hard to hide his smirk.

 

Yoji glared, then gulped down the drink without even looking at it.

 

“Dude, Aya totally picked your pocket. You've been out-charmed by Aya. She chose a surly, gruff, gay man who can barely make conversation over you.” He shook his head. “That's gotta hurt.”

 

“A surly, gruff, gay man who can't make conversation but who is so excessively hot, it doesn't count. Besides, she wouldn't even let you buy her a drink. In fact, you're lucky she didn't call the cops.”

 

“Oh, what's a little gin on the dress among friends? It's clear, for Christ's sake -- it won't even stain. Anyway, whatever -- yeah, I suck. But I'm not the one who's always talking about being God's gift to the ladies.”

 

Yoji sniffed. “I should think not.” He grabbed the drink Aya had brought him and downed that, too, then pouted through another cigarette.

 

“Look, as much as I'm enjoying your existential torment, I have to point out that we may have a problem here. Do you think he has what it takes to get this information out of her? Excessive hotness alone isn't going to cut it.”

 

Yoji's pout deepened. “Seems to be working so far.”

 

“Yeah, but what's he going to do with her when he gets her alone at her place?”

 

Yoji's eyes got huge. He tried to picture Aya doing the things he did in these situations and got nothing but a stomach ache for his trouble. He hadn't bothered considering such a thing, as it hadn't occurred to him for a moment that he wouldn't be doing the job himself.

 

“That's what I'm saying,” Ken said, nodding sagely.

 

Yoji pushed away the most unpleasant thoughts -- his ability to ignore the ugly truth was one of his greatest strengths, he'd always thought. “Aya always manages to get the job done,” he said, lighting up another cigarette and sucking in as much smoke as he could. He briefly considered lighting a second.

 

“Yeah,” Ken said. “But... Yoji, I know you're in `I can't hear you I can't hear you' mode, but, seriously -- can he...? You know.”

 

Yoji had no idea what Ken was talking about, but he did have an almost overwhelming urge to deck him. “Can he what, Ken?”

 

Ken sighed. “Can he, um, romance the ladies, as you always say?”

 

“What are you talking about? You saw him. He was about as smooth as sandpaper, but she seemed to like him.”

 

Ken looked pained. “That's not what I mean. Christ, you're unusually stupid tonight. I'm asking you if he can, you know, get it up. For a woman.”

 

Yoji choked, partially inhaling his cigarette and spitting it out hastily. He flicked the thing into the ashtray and stared at Ken incredulously. “What the hell kind of question is that?”

 

“A blunt, easily understood one, I was hoping. Look, Yoji, I'm just wondering if we need to work on a backup plan. It's nothing against Aya, it's just -- he's gay, Yoji. I understand there's often a little bit of latitude in these things, but from what I know of Aya, he's kind of an all-or-nothing guy. Can he fuck the target or not?”

 

Yoji thought he might hyperventilate. “I'm going to tell him you asked me that,” he muttered.

 

Ken made a dismissive motion with his hand. “Whatever. He'd ask the same thing if he were me. Focus, Yoji. Yes or no?”

 

“How the hell would I know?” Yoji yelled. He grabbed Ken's glass and drank the rest of the other man's beer. “I'm sure he'll figure something out,” he mumbled.

 

**********

 

Yoji sat at the kitchen table and fretted openly. He'd tried several other tacks -- inattentively watching television, listlessly flipping through a catalog -- but none of them had worked. It was less irritating to just sit and smoke and look as freaked out as he wanted to. He didn't bother trying to hide his sigh of relief, either, when Aya came home pretty early -- just a little after one.

 

Aya smiled a little at Yoji's expression. “I considered staying out all night just to teach you a lesson, but I decided that would be immature.”

 

Yoji raised his eyebrow.

 

“And inconvenient.”

 

Yoji nodded. “Sit down and tell me how it went.”

 

“Are Ken and Omi...?”

 

“Both asleep.”

 

Aya nodded and straddled Yoji's legs, sitting in his lap, facing him. He rested his head against the blond's shoulder and hummed to himself for a moment. Then he spoke, quietly, his lips almost touching Yoji's neck. “It went OK, I think. She talked about Yamura -- nothing significant yet, but she seemed to feel... comfortable... with me. I'm seeing her again tomorrow night.”

 

“Did you have to... uh...”

 

“No. She seemed to take my social failings for politeness and my reluctance for respect. I just kissed her goodnight.”

 

“But tomorrow...”

 

“Tomorrow's tomorrow,” Aya murmured, pressing his lips over Yoji's pulse, then sucking gently. He bit a little, then sucked harder. He was squirming distractingly, and it was doing things for Yoji. Good things. He felt like he should probably ask more questions, but he didn't want to think about that anyway, and Aya was sucking his neck and rocking against his cock, so -- no contest. Aya was right -- they could talk about it tomorrow. Or never. Never would be better, really.

 

Except...

 

“Did this get you horny? Because you seem awfully...”

 

“It made me want to be where I want to be. Now shut up,” Aya said, sticking his tongue into Yoji's mouth.

 

Aw -- that was about the sweetest thing anyone had ever said to him. Yoji kissed back with abandon and held Aya's hips in place with both hands, grinding against him until Aya got too heavy and he started losing feeling in his thighs.

 

“Upstairs,” he gasped.

 

“Uh uh,” Aya murmured into Yoji's mouth. He started writhing against Yoji with serious intent. “Want to come. Let me... almost there...” And then Aya threw back his head, gasped, and groaned quietly as he came. He leaned forward against Yoji, head resting on his shoulder, exhausted.

 

Well, Yoji thought, it didn't really matter if he couldn't feel his legs; didn't need them for this anyway. And if Aya was so hot for him that he'd wanted to come in his pants, in the middle of the kitchen, well, Yoji could go there too. He thrust up a few more times, then let go, egged on by the sound of Aya's ragged breathing in his ear. “I love you, baby,” Yoji whispered.

 

“I...”

 

“Shut up. Don't worry about it,” Yoji said, holding him tight.

 

**********

Beta-ed by Noah and Wedjateye