Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ Eine Sache des Vertrauens ❯ What in hell happened last night? ( Chapter 1 )

"Why isn't Aya-san here today?"

That question rang out in the Koneko no Sumu Ie for maybe the one-hundredth time that morning. Omi again quickly made excuses for the absence of their redhead colleague. The young blonde hadn't the slightest idea why Aya hadn't accompanied Youji and Ken back from the safehouse the previous afternoon. Youji only offered a noncommittal snort that the man, as usual, had his solitary reasons. Ken, though, feigned ignorance. He knew more than he let on.

/He still won't look me in the eye./ Ken brooded on his thoughts as he threw a glance at where Youji was artfully, though with some impairment to his usual ease, fielding the chattering school girls. /Guilt. It's as plain as if it's written over his forehead. Guess, he really didn't mean to hurt Aya. I-- didn't mean to either./

Unbidden, an image flashed in his mind's eye of Aya blindfolded, bound with wire and pinned to the rusty grate of the window. Hanging in the midst of the lightly billowing strips of white curtains that appeared to tease and caress the pale expense of naked flesh. Bright ribbons of blood trailing down his side from the wounds on his arm. Wounds that Ken had himself caused when he lashed out at Aya after the stress of that mission, though the brunette would insist that it was unintentional. Again, as with every time Ken thought about it, the focus of his attention was drawn to the blood and semen dripping from his--

Ken forcefully squeezed his eyes shut trying to banish the image. He didn't want to be dragged back into the memory of the events of the previous morning. He hadn't dared ask Youji about what he had seen. Hadn't dared reveal to his colleague that he had actually returned to the safehouse earlier to find--

Neither of the older men had noticed him then. Aya was blindfolded, and even from the distance Ken could tell that the redhead was too deep in shock from the abuse to notice anything else of his surroundings. While Youji? The bastard was too focussed slamming into the bound man's bleeding ass to realise that Ken had just come into the room behind them.

Every atom in Ken's body had screamed at him to interfere then. To leap at the chestnut blonde and drag him off the shuddering figure. But he had stayed frozen in place, unable to comprehend the evidence of his eyes. The only thread of thought that ran through his mind at that moment was that Aya wasn't screaming for Youji to stop. That maybe this was a game that they were playing. That it was a private affair, and that he was intruding on a clandestine moment of play between the two men.

Ken had known from the start that Youji was comfortably Bi. And the chestnut blonde had made no secret of his desire to bed their new colleague from the moment they met. The sparks between the two had flared quite violently. From what little they knew of Aya, Ken could believe that they'd engage in a play of dominance in their sex life. Maybe this bloody bit of bondage sex was a normal occurrence in their relationship.

'Or it could be that Aya had already screamed himself hoarse and could no longer protest.' A little voice in his mind said to him. 'You did leave Aya with a bleeding arm *hours* earlier. How long do you think they might have been at it before you appeared?'

There was no reason he could think of for Youji to snap and attack Aya like that. It must have been a game, but-- they did come off a very stressful mission. Everyone was touchy...

'Stressful or not, there was little reason for you to take a swipe at him yourself.' Ken firmly told that little voice to fuck off.

Ken vainly tried not to think of it, but there was one detail about the scene that was seared into his memory. Aya was apparently whispering to Youji as the older man took him. The redhead choked out one word over and over again with every hard stroke delivered, his breath shuddering to a rhythm under the chestnut blonde's control. He had repeated it enough for Ken to finally read his lips properly.

'Sorry.'

Once he realised this, Ken had almost willed himself to interfere. But Youji chose that moment to make one last hard thrust into the bleeding body hanging on the grate and spill his seed deep into the redhead's ass. And suddenly, Ken felt a need to be elsewhere. He had this burning fear that Youji would turn around to see him, and know in a glance that he had seen him fucking Aya. So he quietly fled back into the shadows and watched as Youji lurched back to his bedroom. Leaving Aya hanging on the grating, unable to move, limp and shivering in shock.

The moment the older man disappeared into his room, Ken had felt a sense of outrage course through him. Felt the screaming need to rush forward and cut the redhead down, then go to the bedroom and slice Youji to pieces with his bugnucks. But he was again immobilised. Stunned at the incomprehensible image of vulnerability in this man who, since the day he joined them, was a poster boy of guarded emotion and undeviating focus and strength. Now, Aya hung from the window grate, head bowed low, chest hitching in trembling sobs, semen and blood dripping from his ass and trickling down his thighs... The brunette couldn't understand what he had just witnessed. He couldn't reconcile 'this' Youji with the man he had known since he joined Weiß. Youji was someone who despite his flirtatious manner always treated his dates and casual flings with consideration and respect. To see this...

Before Ken could make a decision to take some action, Youji had re-emerged from his bedroom, dressed now in his civilian clothes. The older man had released Aya from his bounds, lending the redhead his support as he collapsed against him when numbed and useless limbs failed to hold him up. Seeing how Youji didn't appear to be making any further move to abuse the shaky man, Ken had quietly left and resolved to make more noise when he returned to the safehouse a second time.

The realisation of what he had just done, or rather not done, came to him as he surreptitiously pushed his motorcycle out of the garage. If he hadn't known Youji, he would have immediately thought that the older man was raping Aya. But how well did he know, Kudou Youji? They met in Weiß. They had only been working together for less than six months. Ken had to admit that Aya had so far shown a talent of annoying him to no end by just being there; And-- if the tables were turned, he would have jumped in immediately to rescue Youji. But it was Aya who was bound to the grating-- And he had stood by and let Youji-- He felt sick.

As he rode his bike in a loop around town, Ken had tried to convince himself that it was a moment of intimate play that he had witnessed between the two men. That Aya never cried so he hadn't seen the redhead sobbing as he was left hanging on the rusty grate; That the man was shuddering from arousal and not from shock; That it was a game the two older men were playing. Just a game...

He felt sick.

"Ken-kun, are you all right?" Omi's concerned words shook Ken out of his thoughts to make him notice that he had just drowned the roots of the poor palm tree he was tending to.

"Ahh, just daydreaming, Omi." Ken cursed under his breath as he tipped the excess water away and tried to save the plant. "Sorr--"

/Sorry./ Aya had used that word repeatedly as Youji took him. What was he sorry for? When Ken finally returned to the safehouse, only Youji was still up and waiting for him. The older man had waved a hand towards the bedrooms when he made a silent inquiry about Aya. If he hadn't been aware of what happened earlier, Ken had to admit that he probably wouldn't have known that anything had happened between the two. At least not until later that afternoon, when they both finally woke up after their rest, to discover Aya had left the safehouse without informing them. Youji hadn't looked at any of them in the eye after they returned to the Koneko no Sumu Ie. And no one had seen Aya since.

"Ken-kun?"

Ken shook his head guiltily. He had zoned out on Omi again. The young blonde gave him an understanding smile. "I'm worried about Aya-kun too. He'd usually let me know how long he'd be gone, even if he doesn't tell me where he'd be."

Of course... The moment they met, Aya had immediately recognised Omi as the chief tactician among them. It was the forte of the youngest assassin in their group. And like any good soldier, Aya kept Omi informed of his schedule in case Manx came with a new mission for them. He trusted Omi to offer the preliminary, if not best, direction in a mission.

"Ken-kun, was he hurt last night?"

"He--" An image of dripping semen and blood smacked Ken between the eyes again. "--wouldn't let us check."

"Aya-kun's too used to being alone." Omi rolled his eyes and let out a long-suffering sigh. "We've been working together for over two months. He should know that he can trust us by now."

Omi wasn't looking at Youji then, so he missed seeing the oldest among them wince. If Ken hadn't known Youji, he would have missed the subtle gesture.

/Kami-sama, Youji... Please-- you didn't rape Aya./ Ken kept his thoughts to himself as he tried to concentrate on an arrangement for a client. /I can't believe it-- It was a game. It wasn't rape. It. Wasn't. Rape. You couldn't have, right? Aya would have fought back. He-- could have, couldn't he? You wouldn't have done that to him-- would you?/

"S-s-s-so-so-rry. S-so-rry. S--or--ry." His hitched breathing almost made it too difficult to speak. "Sorry-- Youji-- no more-- please-- Sor-ry-- sor-- ry--"

He felt a cool wet cloth wiping his fevered face and neck, immediately soothing the uncomfortable heat that surrounded him. "Shhh-- Ran? It's okay. You don't need to apologise."

"S--sorry-- sorry--" He opened his glazed eyes to stare at the blurry shapes leaning over him. "It-- hurts-- Youji-- bleedin--"

"The bleeding's stopped, kid. You're okay now." Again he felt the cool cloth. This time wiping the sweat from his neck and chest.

"S--sorry."

"Stop that, Ran." The familiar voice was angry now instead of soothing. "*Stop* saying that."

He shrank back from the fury that was radiating from one of the figures. "S--sorry-- rules--"

"Shut up, Yuushi!" Gentle hands stroked his heated cheeks and the voice was soothing again. "New game. New rules. Okay, kid? Relax. Rest. Sleep. No more 'sorry's. Okay? That game is over."

"Ma-- Masato?" The memory he attached to the voice gave him the name of the darker blur. He felt safe.

"Got that right, kid." He felt the smile and warmth behind the voice. "Could have knocked us for a loop to see you turn up at our doorstep like-- this..."

"And--!" The angry voice was cut off. If he cared to think about it, Masato probably gave his companion a warning look. He was tired. The cool darkness beckoned to him, promising him a retreat from the sweaty uncomfortable heat and the prickling pain of his wounds. He was safe. He let himself slip into sleep.

Hanea Kitada strode towards the office of the Police Commissioner with a purpose. She hadn't liked what Omi had told her in e-mail. Kritiker had gone to a lot of trouble to place Fujimiya Ran with Weiß. A move, she was convince, Takatori Shuuichi had arranged because of a sense of obligation to Ran for what his older brother had done to the man's family.

They were so sure that the trial period was over. Fujimiya Ran had been with Weiß for over two months. Hanea thought that the team was warming to each other. They were certainly working together far more efficiently after Ran joined them. Having a fourth member allowed them to take bigger and more complex missions. They were doing so well, what the hell happened?

Curiously, Kyouko and another woman whom she only knew as Queen, from Crashers, were waiting with the Commissioner when she swept into the office. "Shuuichi-san--"

"There's been an incident. I know." The bearded man shook his head at her tiredly. "We were discussing it with Queen."

"Fujimiya is with Crashers right now. I just told Shuuichi-san that if he is planning to return Ran to Weiß, Cashers will rebel."

"What the--?"

"That's what we need to find out." Kyouko, shrugged in bewilderment. "Hanae, what happened on Weiß's last mission? Did anyone tell you that Ran-kun was injured?"

"No, Omi didn't indicate that there were any injuries from the mission in his report."

"Then maybe we'd better find out face to face." Shuuichi nodded to them. "Ran has no place in Crashers."

"We can make a place." Queen's face turned grim as she glared at the Commissioner.

"Crashers doesn't kill." He looked up at her sadly as he said this. "Ran-- needs the release from that restriction. He is a very angry young man."

The three women exchanged glances as they watched the man they reported to sink into a depression again over Fujimiya's fate. They knew that Takatori Shuuichi took Ran's career and development too personally. Arranging to start him off with Kritiker under Shion's team, through to Crashers... He had hoped that Ran would settle down enough with Crashers to back off on his vendetta and consider returning to Kritiker. He hadn't liked it when Ran refused to rejoin Kritiker and struck out on his own as a freelance assassin. Putting the redhead with Weiß was the only way he could think of to continue to keep an eye on him so that he could watch his back.

But just what the hell happened, in the space of a day, to make Ran go back to Crashers for-- protection? If Queen's demeanour was any indication of how serious the matter was, they were quite sure that Ran must have been hurt badly.

"We'll sort this out, Shuuichi-san."

"Please do."

Manx only knew Crashers by reputation. She was aware of their existence and assisted when she could often enough, but she wasn't as personally involved with the members of Crashers as she was with Weiß. Unlike Weiß, Crashers had Queen. So she hadn't felt a need to keep close tabs on its members. Queen and Bishop ran an admirably tight ship, and a very close-knit group at that. Manx couldn't help but think that staying with Crashers would have been good for Ran. It was certainly a pity that Ran declined to remain with them even after Rook offered him his place. Rook had made it no secret that he was thinking seriously of retirement and was looking for a replacement.

As Queen felt disinclined to accompany her, and perhaps influence her with a biased opinion, Manx found herself alone as the bespectacled man she knew to be Bishop met her at the door. "Ahh, you're here from King, I believe. Queen told me to expect you. Please, do come in."

As she followed him into the house, she had to be mindful that she didn't accidentally kick the curious cat that was currently scuttling around her legs. The little creature appeared to be quite fascinated by her socks, and seemed bent on trying to steal them from under her. "Bishop, lets--" Manx started.

"No you may not see him." Bishop waved off her request firmly while he shooed his cat away and seated her in the living room. "Terribly sorry about that, my cat's usually not that intrusive. Would you like some tea? Freshly brewed."

"Yes, please. And why are Crashers--"

"That has to be for Ran to decide. We all know that he is a very intensely private man." He looked at her apologetically as he served her a cup of green tea. "And the--"

"The fever broke!"

The entrance of this new bright and excited voice brought all attention to the doorway facing the stairs. Manx blinked to see this-- child bounding down the stairs and into the living room. Pawn. If she remembered the case file, this young man was supposed to be-- 19. Yet he appeared to be so much younger than Omi. And his fashion sense--

"The fever broke, Ran-- Oh! Sorry, I didn't know we had visitors." The flamboyantly dressed man skidded to a halt upon seeing Manx.

Bishop hid a smile of amusement by sipping his tea. It appeared that he was not unused to seeing strangers react so towards his colleague. "Well, it appears that you may be allowed to visit Ran after all."

"How did he fall sick?" Manx ventured to ask as they ascended the stairs of the house. "The reports from Weiß--"

She felt the atmosphere surrounding them drop by two degrees. What ever had happened to Ran, it was apparent to her that Crashers as a unit blamed Weiß. Manx hoped that Kyouko was having an easier time prying the truth of the events of the previous mission from Weiß.

"It's all in the mission reports." Youji told Birman sourly as they sat in the mission room. "Over thirty kids-- crucified. Tell me who would not be affected by the sight?"

"Maybe he has just gone to brood?" Omi ventured carefully looking from Ken to Youji. "Ken-kun, you did tell me you didn't return to the safehouse at the same time as Youji-kun or Aya-kun."

"I needed time to think." Ken grunted guiltily. In light of the events he had witnessed at the safehouse, thoughts of the dead children had slipped his mind completely.

"Was he injured? Did neither of you see him at all after the mission?"

"He-- had--" Ken started, but faltered under Omi and Birman's gaze. "I hit him. I didn't mean to. I thought he'd pull away faster."

"Ken-kun! Your bagnuks-- you--"

"I didn't mean it! He was--" Ken gritted his teeth at Birman's accusing stare. "You know how persistent Aya can be. I wanted to be left alone. He didn't want to let me go. I took a swipe at him. And it-- connected. I swear, it was just a scratch! Ask Youji, he must have seen it."

"I saw the scratch. It wasn't serious." Youji glanced at Ken before adding to his description. "Aya wouldn't let me take a closer look. You know how he can be. Locked himself in the bedroom after that.

"He was gone when we checked on him before we left the safehouse." Ken admitted. "We're not sure when he left."

"Just a scratch?" Birman's looked at Ken through narrowed eyes.

"It was an accident! I didn't mean to hurt him." Ken told her as he met her eyes unflinchingly. "I didn't expect to hit him. Can't say who was more surprised, him or me. I-- didn't notice he was distracted. Guess-- guess I didn't think that-- that he was also that affected by the kids' deaths."

Birman shook her head at the silence that fell over the room again. "Fine, it was just a scratch. No other injuries? Are you sure?"

Ken barely stopped himself from glancing in Youji's direction. The blonde man was avoiding all their eves again, this time feigning tiredness and frustration to evade looking at them directly.

"Birman, you seem to know something we don't." Omi spoke softly, bringing all their attention on him. "Has Kritiker found Aya-kun?"

The cool brunette nodded at last. "We have him at another safehouse. Manx has gone over to assess the state of his health. The agent who told us didn't feel it was appropriate to discuss it."

"Discu-- Why? How badly was--?" Omi's words died off as he absorbed the implications of the silence. "Oh-- was-- was he attacked after he left our safehouse?"

"That's what we're trying to ascertain." Birman nodded. Ken guessed that she didn't feel up to voicing the thoughts that everyone knew must be uppermost in their minds. "Is there anything else you can add? Anything important you think you might have left out about the mission? If he had been hurt during the mission and didn't let you know, maybe?"

"No." Ken shook his head firmly. "We were together at the confrontation." He stopped himself again from turning to look at Youji expectantly. He wasn't going to jump all over Youji about what he'd chance to see before they talked. Not in front of Birman, in any case.

An image flashed before his eyes again. Of Aya, hanging from the window grating by Youji's wires... Vulnerably exposed... Defeated... Bleeding...

Raped.

At least that's what Birman was apparently suspecting. Unless Aya met up with someone else, and Ken hoped to god he hadn't in his already messed up state, Youji had hurt Aya enough to--

"When-- will Aya be well enough to come back?" Omi's words interrupted Ken's thoughts.

"That is being assessed right now. I haven't seen him yet." Birman admitted to them as she gathered her papers to leave. "I don't know how badly he was hurt, but you needn't worry. He's in good hands. Either Manx or I will contact you later about seeing him again."

Omi escorted her out leaving Ken and Youji to brood in the mission room. Ken watched them go, hoping that Omi would decide to stay away. It wasn't unreasonable for their youngest member to think that the two of them felt guilty over how Aya had emerged from their 'shift', and needed the time to be left alone to think about it. Ken wondered what was going through Youji's mind right now. He figured he might as well get the ball rolling.

"Youji?"

The other man looked up at him cautiously.

"I-- it-- that morning-- I actually came back earlier." Ken could see Youji grow tense at his words. "I-- saw what you did to Aya."

Fujimiya Ran had always looked pale, but Manx would swear now that he looked as white as the sheets he was wrapped in. He lay quietly sleeping, looking almost drowned by the pillows on the soft comfortable looking bed. But despite the paleness and the bandaged arms, he didn't look very much worse for wear. That is, if she discounted the dark rings under his eyes.

She was puzzled over why she was allowed to see him now when they hadn't wanted to let her in earlier. Ran was fast asleep and unaware of her. What differenc-- The fever. That was the only conclusion she could come to. They may have been afraid that she'd hear something he did not intend to let her know in his fevered ramblings. Manx kept her huff of frustration to herself.

Her attention turned for a while to the two men who gently tended to Ran as he slept, Knight and Rook. She didn't have to be a mind reader to tell how angry they were. But if she made the connection of Queen's evasive words of his injuries, and Crasher's vehement reluctance to let Ran return to Weiß... She could scarcely believe the conclusion she was reaching. No one had yet stated out in the open what could have happened. But the way they all appeared to avoid even saying more about Ran's injuries... She didn't want to jump to conclusions. She didn't want to consider the possibility... Manx wanted to think that it was just an arm injury, infected because it had been left untreated, that brought the redhead so low.

"You don't believe us do you?"

"Knight?" Receiving a nod from the blonde man acknowledging the correct reference, she tried to state her misgivings as diplomatically as possible. "I don't believe or disbelieve anything without evidence. Infection--"

"That was only one of the complications-- Manx, is it?" At her nod, Knight reached over to gently take Ran's limp right arm in his hand and start to unwrap part of the bandages. "It may have been no more than a 'scratch' but the problem was actually compounded."

"I don't understand--" Manx's eyes widened to see the five parallel grooves down the right arm. The wounds were still slightly swollen and puffy, but the infection had been brought under control, so there was no danger that the cuts wouldn't heal. But the sight that made her gasp were the angry red stripes that criss-crossed over the grooves.

"Wouldn't you say this was caused by wire?" Rook told her coldly as his finger reached out to lightly stroke a mark.

Ken waited patiently. He felt like it had been nearly an hour since he asked the question of Youji, but the older man had yet to reply. And Ken was determined to get an answer. He didn't care how long he waited. He wanted to know what had happened that early morning after the mission. So engrossed in these thoughts was he, that he almost missed Youji's whispered words when he did begin to speak.

"I fucked up."

"What was that?"

"How-- how much did you see?"

Ken looked at Youji coolly and described the events and the images that had plagued him even more than the crucified kids in the mission ever did. Youji was shaking slightly by the time he was done.

"Kami-sama... I--"

"What happened?" Ken tried his best to keep his tone completely neutral. He was determined not to present a biased front. He was not there to judge. "Why don't we start from the beginning?"

"It. Was. Not. Rape." An extremely pale Ran glared warningly at Knight as they stayed locked in a contest of wills.

"I can't believe you're defending--!"

"Yuushi!" Masato cut him off and looked at the two friends sternly. Whatever the situation, he could without fail trust the two to get into a verbal shouting match at the drop of a hat. This time it was triggered by Knight's statement to Ran, upon his awakening, that Manx came by while he was sleeping and had been told that he would not be returning to Weiß.

Ran had been furious. He thought they had told Manx that Weiß had raped him. Which they hadn't, they hadn't said a word to her about what further wounds they encountered when cleaning Ran up. Crashers had rightly thought that those intimate injuries were something intensely private that Ran would fiercely keep to himself rather than let anyone like Manx hear. If she thought it was rape that was her own deduction. All Yuushi made her aware of were the marks made by wires over his arms. They didn't say anything or speculate as to why Balinese might have reason to tie him up so cruelly.

Seeing how weak Ran was, Masato knew that the last thing he needed right now was to get into a fight with Yuushi. Not especially over events Ran had yet to tell them about. And blonde man's usual confrontational style with Ran was not going to be appropriate. He understood Yuushi's genuine concern for Ran's welfare. They had been lovers for nearly as long as they had been colleagues. But yelling at Ran was not going to get him to talk about it.

"Ran? Are you hungry?"

As if in reply to the question, Ran's stomach made an embarrassingly loud growl, which made the pale man flush slightly. But it was still not the deep red blush that they were accustomed to seeing paint his cheeks when he was self-conscious about something. It would be a while before he recovered that. He had lost too much blood with his injuries.

"Yuushi, why don't you see if you and Naru can make Ran some chicken porridge without blowing up the kitchen?"

The blonde threw an assessing look at his older colleague before glancing to where Ran had exhaustedly lain back in the bed. "Naru knows better than to bring his toys in the kitchen now." He shrugged as he aimed his light words to Ran carefully. "We discovered that as long as one of us is around to watch him, he can cook pretty well."

"I thought he'd have lost interest in learning how to cook by now." Ran gazed up at him tiredly. "The house account must be a lot richer."

"Well, after you left... We still have to eat, you know? And yeah, it's a lot nicer having an intact kitchen." Yuushi shrugged as he headed for the door. But he threw one parting shot before he slipped out of the room. "Rest, you hear me?"

As soon as the door closed behind their friend, Masato made his move to sit on the bed beside Ran and pull the younger man into his embrace. He held down his worried sigh as he felt Ran flinch slightly at his touch before trustingly laying back in the circle of his arms.

Masato didn't say anything. In the six months they had stayed together in the same house, when Ran was filling in for him as Rook while he struggled with his long recovery, Masato had come to realise a lot of things about the closed off young man. One of the things was that if he knew you were expecting something of him, and no one nagged him about it and waited 'expectantly' instead, he'd eventually give in and talk. True to form, Ran started speaking at last.

"It-- was my fault. It was just a game, Masato. We-- we've played it often enough." Ran murmured quietly. "Youji was-- we started-- It was my fault."

Masato was determined to be calm about this. It was true that Ran had regularly played bondage games with him and Yuushi when they were still together. But they had *never* gone so far as to draw blood and hurt each other before. "What were his rules?"

"Behave-- No struggling. No questions-- No choice."

"Or what?"

"He'd-- leave me tied up for Ken to see."

"Did you listen?"

Ran's voice was almost too quiet for him to catch the reply. "No."

Masato's blood turned cold. "Did he leave you?"

"No-- He cut me down."

"What was your safe word?" Ran didn't answer him. Masato could feel him trembling in his embrace. "Ran, you did have a safe word, didn't you?"

"It was my fault."

"That's not a safe word." The older man told him softly as he hugged him closer. "What was your safe word?"

"We-- didn't have one."

Masato sighed as he remembered Ran's earlier fevered ramblings. He kissed the younger man on the temple before breathing softly into his ear, "Liar."

Ken's head was reeling from everything that Youji was telling him. Bondage sex games... If the circumstances had not been so serious, he was quite sure that he'd have been amused, but...

"Kami-sama, I-- I broke my own rules, Ken." Youji leaned over his knees and stared at his feet miserably. "It's-- it's unforgivable."

"'Sorry', was that the safe word?" That realisation suddenly flashed at Ken.

As soon as he said it, Youji had jerked up in his seat to stare at him. "Yes." The older man's answer was almost too soft for him to catch.

"Shit." Of all the words to use with as prideful a man as Aya... From what little they knew of the redhead, Ken thought that he'd cut out his tongue first before admitting to a fault he didn't believe in. Yet-- Ken shuddered to remember what he had seen Aya to be choking out to Youji as the older man finished him off. He had said it repeatedly.

"And I didn't stop. I was so-- That's no excuse-- He used it. And I didn't stop." Youji's hands reached up to tear at his hair in wretched frustration. "Kami-sama, I didn't stop."

"It's not your fault." Masato stroked Ran's hair comfortingly.

"I *wasn't* raped." Ran growled firmly. "I consented. I let him take me."

Masato kissed him on the temple again before he spoke softly to the shaking man. "Ran, love. I know you. I've seen what's under those bandages. You kept trying to fight the bondage. Your left arm is one massive bruise, and you nearly mangled your right arm trying to get free. It's okay to admit it."

"Masato, he didn't-- rape me." Ran's hand tried to tighten over the arm hugging him, but his strength was far from restored. "He didn't."

"He ripped you open down there, Ran." The older man told him gently. "You needed stitches."

"No. It-- wasn't that bad."

"Did you feel pleasure at all when he took you?" Ran didn't answer. Masato sucked in a deep breath and didn't question him any further.

"He didn't rape me, Masato." The older man could hear the strain in his voice. "I could have stopped the 'game' before it got too far. I really could have."

Masato didn't say anything to that. Ran was in denial. He knew that anything he said would only make the redhead more upset. He gently tightened his hug and continued to stroke his hair.

"It wasn't his fault."

The older man kept his words to himself. He doubted that he'd ever find out the full details of what happened, but the evidence to his eyes was damning enough. He and Yuushi had been shocked to find Ran collapsed at their doorstep the previous evening. The redhead was dressed in the familiar leather trench coat with the zippered sleeves, which they had always thought was such an erotic turn on, but was now in a distressful state. It looked barely held together by the various buckles and straps and had easily fallen apart at their gentle tugging. Under it though, they had been alarmed to find the younger man's black pants nearly soaked in blood, same as the tattered sleeve on his right arm. He was almost bled white.

Even in his fevered delirium, Ran wanted to fight them before he'd let them take him to a hospital. Queen managed to discretely arranged for a doctor, unconnected to Kritiker, to make a house call. When he was done, the doctor had spoken to them grimly and with ill concealed anger about the injuries. He saw straight through their lies about accidents and bondage games gone wrong.

The doctor's vehement statement occupied his mind again. /"This was an act of selfish *hate*, young man. *Not* passion gone wild."/

/Ran, love. If this Youji had any feelings for you, he wouldn't have torn you apart like that. No one believes you felt anything *but* pain when he was fucking you. Even the doctor says that the bastard was only interested in his own pleasure./

"He was pissed off with me." Ran stated quietly, drawing Masato's attention back to him. "I knew that. I should have just cooperated from the start."

Masato barely held himself off from screaming at Ran. /Damn it, Ran, no! That's *not* how the game is played. That's not how we taught you to play it. Safe words, demands for the games to cease, that's the receiver's privilege. Not--/

A knock on the door interrupted his thoughts, and the two men looked up to see Yuushi, Naru and Reiichi coming in with a few trays of food. At the raising of Ran's curious eyebrow, the bespectacled leader of the group smiled and enlightened them to the situation.

"Well, seeing how most of us were going to be here, I thought it would be pleasant if we could have supper together."

"Yeah, but if those three start to get kinky, I'm out of here." Naru waggled his eyebrows at Ran mischievously.

A snort of laughter escaped Ran's lips before he could control it. Masato nodded minutely to Naru in thanks for the laugh as he felt the warm blush suffuse the lithe figure in his arms.

"So-- do you want us to feed you?" Yuushi's voice was fairly dripping with sexuality as he took his place on Ran's other side with the tray carrying his porridge.

"Yuushi!" Ran blushed even hotter as he grabbed the spoon before anyone could even try to attempt to spoon-feed him.

"Oh, my poor innocent ears." Naru pouted cutely as he gave his leader a long-suffering look. "I swear these three can introduce sex into any topic."

"Ahh, but it is so easy to do with food, Naru." Reiichi explained patiently. "Food can be a very sensual subject."

"Reiichi! Why you sly devil." Yuushi looked at him in mock shock. "Tell us more. Tell us more."

Masato felt Ran relax in his arms. Now more than ever, he regretted ever allowing the redhead a chance to disappear on them six months ago after he had healed sufficiently to take back the role of Rook.

/Stubborn, stubborn kid. Queen was trying to find a way for you to stay with Crashers. You fitted in fine with us, Ran. Not Weiß. Not if they will do this to you and make you think that you deserve it. Even now, you came to us for help, and for safety you could trust. I hope you think about it and stay this time./