Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ New Rules, New Ruler ❯ Chapter 3

Part Three

They had been in Germany for three weeks now and Brad finally found that he could relax enough to enjoy their little, long overdue, holiday. He'd spent the first week worrying about how Nagi's depression was being coped with, the second Schuldig's shielding, and the third Farferello's sudden interest in cooking.

Nagi was the main worry. His `councillor' was a telempath. In Brad's mind, this was the psychic equivalent of lots and lots of `happy pills', something several doctors had tried to prescribe for Nagi. Fortunately, Nagi would touch nothing in pill form and his pathological fear of needles prompted questions Brad had no intention of asking. The telempath was a nice girl though; shy, hiding her face behind large floppy hats and huge glasses, but as nice as they come. Brad just worried about whether Nagi would suffer withdrawal when they went back to Tokyo. The girl clearly would never cope in a large city.

Then there was Schuldig, who seemed to have regressed somewhat. He was finally managing to get his shields back up, with a little help via videophone from one of the only two other telepaths, who was currently living in the centre of Iceland. He kept forgetting, not who he was, but when he was. There were times when he didn't recognise any of the other members of Schwarz, and these times were growing more common. He seemed to be shielding his own thoughts from himself. On the other hand, when he was aware of where, why, when and who he was, he was absolutely devoted to Brad and Brad's own pleasure and leisure during their stay in Germany. Brad was touched in ways he'd never thought he would be.

And Farferello. They were not only letting him near knives, they were encouraging him to use them. And spatulas. For some reason the spatulas bugged Brad more than the knives. He had known Farferello loved knives. But a tool used to flip pancakes and pry burnt remains from the bottom of the frying pan? Brad wondered if he should trust Farf's cooking. Last time he had cooked for Schwarz, several years ago now, he had made Haggis. It had been a nice haggis, until Brad found himself trying to remember which animals haggis came from, and suddenly recalled that Farferello had cooked and perhaps animals weren't the issue here. He'd managed to put Schuldig off the meal as well, which was quite and accomplishment, but even Schuldig drew the line a possible cannibalism.

Brad stretched out on the bed. He smiled to himself. Since the destruction of SS, Schwarz hadn't known what to do with themselves, and everything Brad had tried had just been a distraction from the ultimate truth: they were defunct. But now… now perhaps they weren't.

Brad heard the door open, but didn't look up. He had known Schuldig would come and see him. "Where do we stand?" Schuldig mused softly.

Brad sat up sharply. Damn, that had been exactly what he'd been thinking. "Damn…" Schuldig said sharply. Crawford concentrated hard on the differences between himself and Schuldig. It took a few minutes, but eventually self-awareness crept back into Schuldig's eyes.

"You think I'm sexier than you are?" he asked softly. Brad flushed. Schuldig smirked at him. "Well thank you, but let me tell you, your pretty damn fine yourself. Why do you have to analyse everything all the time?" he whined suddenly. "Our relationship works, why do you need to know why it does? If we talk about it, it might cease to work!"

"If it's that fragile, perhaps it's not worth it," Brad suggested softly. He patted the bed beside him, gesturing for Schuldig to sit next to him. The German sprawled his body across the bed, looping an arm around Brad's waist and hooking a leg over one of his. The sudden physical intimacy startled Brad, but he knew that that was why Schuldig had done it. That, and he needed the reassurance that there were two separate bodies in the room.

"It is worth it, I think," Schuldig whispered. Brad found himself sinking down in the bed slightly, and Schuldig rested his head on the older man's chest. Brad ran his fingers through the flaming hair. "I mean, I like this."

"So do I," Brad murmured. "How did we get here?" he asked rhetorically.

"I set out to seduce you, but you recognised this and figured perhaps sex might be a good way to control me, since nothing else was working. So, we had lots of sex for about a fortnight, then you dumped me." Schuldig frowned. "Why?"

Brad flinched at the sudden answer. "I ended it. It wasn't your fault," he said, twisting his fingers in Schuldig's long hair. "I knew it was going to happen-"

"Vision?" Schuldig demanded.

"Yes, a vision. And when I thought about it, I could see why. You had achieved your objective in turning the formerly straight as a plank Bradley Crawford, so there was nothing left for you in the relationship. I found it did nothing for my control over you. It made sense."

"Yeah right."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Brad demanded, hurt.

"It made sense in your head. It never made sense to anyone or anything else." Schuldig slid his hand under Brad's shirt, by way of apology for his harsh, but true, words. "So, I set out to seduce Yohji. I succeeded. You convinced yourself it was something you sanctioned, as it threw him into confusion. Got over that quickly, the bastard," Schuldig added suddenly. "Anyway, so I set out to seduce Aya. I stopped after a while, because my namesake starts tugging at my heart strings."

Brad stared at him. He'd never thought there was more to Schuldig's sudden cessation of interest in Aya than reason he brought about himself. Schuldig grinned at him. "Your shielding is so damned good I had no idea how jealous I was making you. It wasn't until later I realised that it was your reaction, and your inability to deny yourself, that made you come around. Once I did, however, "Schuldig suddenly added with unusual gravity, "I recognised the motive of my own actions. I wanted you to be jealous. I was mad that you dumped me, and I wanted you to hurt, but I didn't realise I wanted you back. Oh, and Aya was so pathetically in love with Yohji I felt bad for not being Yohji myself."

"So, we both came around to the idea that perhaps there had been more to our fortnight than the fucking," Brad supplied thoughtfully, continuing the trip down memory lane himself. "Then there was that mission with just the two of us, and one thing led to another. And then, about a week later, you came to me and we did it again. And so on and so forth."

Schuldig sat up slightly, to stare into his lover's eyes. "No wonder you want to know where we stand. I don't have the faintest idea what our relationship is either, and I don't like it."

"Ok, so…" Brad wrapped both arms around Schuldig, "at least we can say relationship. So what are we, occasional bedmates?"

"Yeah." A memory stung Schuldig suddenly; "`Part-time boyfriend'?" he asked. "Replace part with full and I'm happy. You?"

Brad was startled. Schuldig was asking him to commit? Schuldig? His silence stung Schuldig to keep on talking.

"I know that sex is a power thing for you. I've known a lot of people for whom it was the same thing. But we also know that it doesn't give you any power over me. And for me, when I'm not being used in these power struggles by underachievers, sex is a game. I enjoyed seducing and chasing, and sex was just the confirmation I won. But we established that the game never actually took place between us, so that's pretty defunct too." Schuldig was aware he was babbling, but at least it meant he didn't have to think, and, more importantly, he didn't have to worry about what Brad was thinking. "And yet, we're still doing this. And it bothered both of us when it stopped. I mean, it's great sex, but there's definitely an emotional attachment associated with it. Otherwise I wouldn't have got mad and you wouldn't have got jealous. And-"

"Enough," Brad said. Schuldig fell silent.

Brad hugged the younger man closer to him. He had been telling the truth when he'd mentioned his heterosexuality earlier, and the effect Schuldig had had on his previously firm self-beliefs. And he was glad it had been Schuldig who had enlightened him. There was something about the absolutely tactless, completely irrepressible, dubiously sane, sadistically happy younger man. Brad felt they… they `complemented' each other. What one lacked the other made up. And Schuldig was clearly as confused and nervous about this sudden wealth of emotion that threatened to overwhelm them both as he was.

"I think we should take it more slowly," Brad said quietly. "We have a monogamous sexual relationship and we work and live together. This is rarely a good situation."

Schuldig looked so pathetically mournful Brad gave him a sympathetic squeeze. "But if any one can make it work, we can," he murmured in the younger man's ear.

"We're going to fuck now?" Schuldig asked bluntly.

"That's the plan," Brad laughed.