Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ No Touchy! ❯ Rub Down ( Chapter 10 )

NT11

 

Two days had gone by since the bonfire in the backyard. Crawford had taken the price of the expensive table out of Farf and Nagi's pay since they were the ones to actually set it ablaze. Farf had simply shrugged and said as long as he had his knives, money was not a necessity. That statement made Crawford fear even more for his already questionable sanity.

 

It was on the third day that Crawford got a call he dreaded. Takatori was calling him, not the team, out of town overnight.

 

He carefully and meticulously locked his office and bedroom, fully expecting to come back the next evening to find them completely and utterly trashed.

 

“I'm leaving Nagi in charge,” Crawford announced to his team, to the loud protests of the two older men.

 

“Why the hell is the baby in charge?” Schuldig complained.

 

“Because he occasionally has the sense the gods gave cabbage,” Crawford said, picking up his overnight bag and starting to walk out the door. “No parties, drugs or strippers.”

 

“Prostitutes?” Schuldig asked, grinning evilly.

 

“Just keep them in your room. I don't want anymore furniture incinerated.”

 

Schuldig huffed and pouted, crossing his arms over his chest. Crawford turned away to hide the smile on his face at Schuldig's reaction to his question concerning prostitutes. Sometimes reverse psychology worked so well.

 

Schuldig and Farf looked at eachother the instant the Jag cleared the end of the driveway.

 

“I'll call the strippers,” Schuldig said.

 

“I'll call the dealer,” Farf said.

 

“I'll be hiding in my room,” Nagi said then proceeded to march upstairs.

 

“Are we really going to have a party?” Farf asked, looking at Schuldig curiously.

 

“Nein. Too easy and he's expecting the place to look like it's been a long time opium den at best, an American Frat house at worst.”

 

“So, what do you have in mind, then?”

 

“Something even *he* won't See coming,” Schuldig said, smirking widely.

 

 

Crawford unlocked the front door and cautiously opened it. Unfortunately, he could never “See” what Schuldig was planning. He shuddered at the imagined horrors he might walk into; furniture dangling from the ceiling, naked female sumo wrestlers and free range hamsters were all possibilities.

 

Nothing assaulted him when he came through the door, nor when he walked into the kitchen. Something very strange was going on here, he thought suspiciously. Then he caught the sound of music playing quietly in the living room followed by the sound of Schuldig's voice.

 

“Hmmm, that's *so* good, Kikyo. A little harder there. Oh, yeah, right *there*,” he heard Schuldig moan.

 

Damn it, Crawford thought, I guess he did go for the prostitutes. He strode toward the screen dividing the living room from the hall when it slid open to reveal a traditionally dressed young woman. She bowed deeply to him.

 

“Welcome home, Crawford-san. We've been expecting you. Follow me, please,” she said, turning back into the room.

 

Crawford came cautiously into the room. Most of the furniture had been pushed to the sides of the room and four massage tables now dominated the space. Schuldig was flopped on his stomach having his lower back massaged. The lady rubbing Farf's left arm was giggling and blushing over something he had said to her, of all the strange things in the Universe. And Nagi seemed to be fast asleep.

 

“Brad-chan, we saved you a table,” Schuldig said, lifting his head from the table. “Take your clothes off.”

 

Crawford glared at the top of Schuldig's bright head before accepting the yukata from the woman still patiently waiting beside him. He sighed heavily and handed her his suit jacket.

 

“Better get started on him ASAP. It'll take you all night to get the knots out of his shoulders alone,” Schuldig said, reaching for one of the many snacks settled on a silver tray in front of him.

 

Crawford glared at him again before making his way to the bathroom to change. Schuldig propped his chin on his folded hands and waited, watching the bathroom door closely. When Crawford came out again he grinned a little, thinking the man looked positively edible in a yukata.

 

“Damn, Brad, you look even more fuckable than usual in that,” Schuldig said, trying to stifle a yawn. He was a little disappointed when the young woman held up a sheet so Crawford could shrug out of the yukata and lie down on the table. But he had already seen that long, lean body naked, so he supposed if he missed it once it wouldn't kill him.

 

“What brought this on, Schuldig?” Crawford asked, trying not to wince as the young woman began trying to work the knots out of his shoulders and neck.

 

Schuldig shrugged. “I just felt the need to have my ass rubbed.”

 

“Is this on my credit card?” Crawford asked suspiciously.

 

“Nein,” Schuldig said, before putting his head back down on the table.

 

Crawford stared at the top of Schuldig's head for a moment trying to figure out the catch to this enjoyable interlude. There *had* to be a catch. As the hard knots in his muscles were worked out somewhat, he decided he didn't care at that point in time and would deal with any infractions tomorrow.

 

Schuldig smiled into the table when he heard a very satisfied groan from Crawford. Farf had rolled onto his side and was looking at Schuldig curiously.

 

“Think we should put Nagi to bed or just let him sleep there?” Farf asked, sounding amused.

 

“I think the girls want their table back sometime tonight,” Schuldig said, getting up and wrapping a sheet around his waist. “C'mon Naggles, time for nighty night,” he said, pulling a little on the still sleeping Nagi.

 

“Hmnnzz?” was the only response from the boy as Schuldig tried to get him awake enough to sit up at least.

 

Farf got up, not bothering with any kind of covering and picked Nagi up. “Go back to your rubdown,” Farf said. “I'll put him to bed.”

 

“Farf, do you have *any* idea how disturbing that is?” Schuldig remarked as Farf made his way to the doors.

 

“Consider it payback for being forced to look at *your* ass so much in the past few weeks,” Farf said over one shoulder.

 

Schuldig flopped back onto the table and sighed happily as the girl started to work on his lower back again.

 

“Schuldig,” came Crawford's voice from the other side of the room. “This had better *not* be on my credit card.”

 

“It's on mine. Scheisse, Brad. Relax.”

 

“I find it rather difficult to relax when I know you're up to something.”

 

“I've been trying to show you what I can get up to for months now.”

 

Crawford glared blearily in his direction.

 

Schuldig rolled to a sitting position. “Kikyo, my dear, you did a wonderful job. I'm going to get some sleep. Ladies, feel free to massage the boss there into a quivering mass of goo. Please lock up when you leave.”

 

“Domo arrigato, Schuldig-san.”

 

An hour and a half later Crawford could believe they really *had* tried to massage him into a quivering mass of goo. He didn't think he'd been this relaxed in ages, which of course, made him worry about *why* Schuldig had wanted him to relax in the first place.

 

He walked to the door of his office, still padlocked, no sign of forced entry. He frowned a little but left it at face value. He'd deal with any disasters in the morning. He then went further down the hall and unlocked the door to his bedroom. Looking around he saw nothing out of place. The only odd thing was the strings of condoms adorning every available surface. He sighed and shook his head when pulling back the sheets to find a deflated blow up doll. He had to give Schuldig credit, there had barely been a crease in the covers and the doll was a redhead.

 

“If that's the best you can do, Schuldig, you need to reread your sexual torture manual.”

 

Outside of Crawford's door Schuldig smirked. “You have *no* clue what I can do, Bradley. No clue at all.”