Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ Reminiscence of Antiquity ❯ Understandably Lost and Unassuredly found ( Chapter 5 )

Title: Reminiscence of Antiquity

Chapter: 5 - Understandably Lost and Unassuredly found

Rated: PG

Warnings: Eventual shounen-ai ( AxY & KxO)

Legal stuff: Well... I think it's obvious but I'll state it anyway. I down own them! Please don't sue me? I'm poor... seriously...>_>;

Thanks to: My editor, Shaeric Draconis, the Squall x Zell + Aya x Youji Yaoi fanfic group, the creators of Weiss Kreuz, the Readers and my fellow Gypsies everywhere. AYYA! Vive la Resistance!

Author and Editor notes: Production of these chapters has been really slow lately due to a little thing called Life. I'm sorry they are not coming quicker than what they have been coming in at but don't worry, I haven't given up on this story just yet. In fact, I plan to see it through for however long it takes. Please don't give up on this story, it's far from dead. Thank you ^_^!

Kaholione - I'm glad you are enjoying the story and thank you for your support but as stated above, I have no intention to let this story become a dead one.

Chicho, Aisha_Max, Pink bunny 1& others - I made a tiny bit of fan service for all of you who have asked for it ^_^;; thanks again for sticking with me.

~*~

6:30 pm

The car moved along the road at a steady pace as the sun began to set in the distance. The colors which the setting sun displayed were a spectacular show that only nature could provide its inhabitants. It was such a marvelous sight through the car window that one could find themselves at peace with everything by simply watching it. Half closed emerald eyes observed the colors swirling together in the sky to highlight the beautiful which could never be found in inner city Tokyo. The blond let out a breath of air and relaxed into his seat with the thought that nothing could disturb the sense of peace he felt. Well... almost nothing.

"Ken, stop kicking the back of my chair."

"Sorry."

Shaking his head, Yohji turned to look at the ever-silent driver who kept his eyes on the road, his attention never wavering for a second. Aya had mentioned to them earlier that he had a friend who specialized in foreign languages at a college not far out of Tokyo. Apparently Aya's friend studied things like Latin which happened to be a dead language so the others deduced it was a good place to start. Well, actually, Yohji deduced it was a good place to start while Ken distracted himself with a pen he had fished out of his backpack. Ken had given up trying to have a conversation with either Yohji or Aya early on in the trip. The brunette had discovered quickly that Aya was anything but the talkative type and Yohji... well... Yohji seemed to get quiet around Aya. Perhaps this was out of respect for Aya's quiet nature or maybe it was out of habit, which caused Ken to wonder how much time these two actually spent together.

Lavender eyes made a quick glance in Ken's direction before turning over to Yohji who seemed to be enthralled with the setting sun. Yohji had never really brought up the tattoo on the back of his neck before so Aya was forced to presume that Ken had a lot to do with it. The redhead let his attention flicker back to the road for a bit as he set deeper into his thoughts about Yohji and his friend. The blond wasn't one to make new friends often so it was easy to understand how surprised Aya was when the teen had brought him the news that he had made a new friend. Ken, unlike the boy's gypsy friends, was loud, into sports, somewhat overly compassionate and not exactly the brightest crayon in the box. However, from what Yohji had told Aya, the brunette soccer fanatic had a good heart and was worthy of Yohji's friendship. Or at least he had better be worthy or-

"How long until we get there?" the soccer fanatic suddenly spoke up, causing Aya to glance at his watch.

"In a couple of minutes."

Ken groaned and swore he was going to kill himself if this had to go on any longer; the kid had problems dealing with all the silence which seemed to haunt Aya and infect Yohji. What felt like ages later when the car finally stopped, Ken ripped off his seat belt, hardly able to contain his ecstasy. Perhaps he was being a bit too dramatic when he leaped out of the car and practically hugged the ground, utterly grateful to stretch his legs and remove himself from the impending silence. However, since the other two didn't say anything about it Ken wasn't about to fret over what they thought about his display of over-the-top dramatics. So after the teen picked himself up off the ground, the three stole glances at each other then made their way to the building which loomed ahead of them, holding back something they desperately wanted to know.

Old doors squeaked open and Yohji wrinkled his nose at the idea of being in some type of school after school hours by his own free will. Pushing his faint dislike for schools aside, he and the others pressed on down the hall until Aya came to a dead stop in front of one of the classroom doors. Ken nearly collided with Yohji who had stopped just as abruptly as Aya, but before either of them could comment on the near collision Aya opened the door and ushered them both in. For being a talented soccer player Ken sure did seem to be a klutz at times. This, of course, had come as a shock to Yohji when he first realized it, after all weren't soccer players supposed to be attentive and really good on their feet? Maybe it had to do with the fact that Ken spent a lot of his time day dreaming about being on the field scoring numerous goals that he forgot to check back in with reality before running into someone or tripping over something. That would explain why he was so graceful on the field and so graceless everywhere else.

"Yohji?"

Yohji blinked a few times and turned his attention to the three persons who were staring at him as if they were expecting something from him. Oh damn. How long had they been talking? The blond mentally kicked himself as a reminder to stop spacing off during important meetings and conversations.

"I'm sorry..." the teen laughed nervously, "What did you say?"

"I said," Aya continued, "This is Professor Botan."

Yohji bowed, feeling faintly embarrassed before rising, "A pleasure to meet you, Botan-sensi" He said quickly, "I'm-"

"Kudou Yohji." The professor smiled, "Fujimiya-san already introduced you."

The young gypsy looked at Aya who was looking at the professor, "So I see." He nodded then turned his attention back to Botan.

"So what is this about a tattoo?" The Professor pressed on and Yohji realized it was probably because he had a rather busy schedule.

"Well it's-" the boy had started when a cell phone suddenly went off, causing all of them to jump at the sudden introduction of a loud irritating noise.

"Sorry." Aya spoke flatly as he picked up the phone and walked towards the door, "Fujjimiya speaking." Aya had opened the door and was about to leave when he suddenly stopped and his body went slightly ridged. The man glanced over his shoulder and looked directly at Yohji, "Yes, how may I help you?"

Yohji wrinkled his brow in confusion long before Aya stepped out and closed the door behind him. What the hell was THAT all about? Why had Aya looked at him like that? Was the phone call about him or was Aya just being peculiar? Not that Aya wasn't always peculiar but-

"You were saying?" The professor broke up Yohji's thoughts.

"What?" He blinked as a natural reaction before remembering what they were talking about just a minute ago, "Oh yes, the tattoo. It's on the back of my neck." And as those words were spoken he turned around and lifted up his hair to show the professor. He could hear the man shifting behind him to put on glasses so he could see the writing better. Yohji held his breath slightly as he patiently waited for the man to inspect the back of his neck then move away from him. Yohji didn't like people being close to him, emotionally or physically for that matter; not since he was twelve anyway. The boy had stopped trusting everyone but a select few people when he was twelve. What exactly had caused this distrust of people in his life? When he was twelve he was placed in a bad home...

"When did you get this?" The dark haired man questioned.

"I've always had it." Yohji spoke quickly, wanting nothing more than to back away from the professor who was still inspecting the back of his neck so carefully. Even though he knew the man was only concerned in the tattoo, he was still very unnerved by it all.

"Interesting." The lower voice cracked the air once more before, much to Yohji's relief, the man backed away.

"Can you read it?" Leave it to Ken to ask all the questions.

"Unfortunately, no..." the brunette's obvious disappointed was instant, "but, " Ken perked up a little, "I can tell you it looks like an ancient writing called Sanskrit.

"But you can't read it?" Ken was pressing and Yohji half wondered why.

"No."

"Can't even try?"

Botan looked annoyed at this point, "Look, it's like this." The professor leaned back against his desk and removed the glasses, which had been so prominently perched upon his nose half hiding a long scar that ran along the side of his face. What an interesting man this guy must have been when he was younger. "The thing on the back of his neck is like... well... a truck. I can tell you it's a truck but I can't tell you it's a 1996 Toyota 4x4 with a V8 engine. It's just a truck to me, however, I -do- know someone who could tell you exactly what kind of truck this is."

Ken looked confused. Yohji could tell by the faint stress lines forming at the corners of his eyes as he tried to process the information the professor had just laid out before him. "Wait... so it says truck? I thought you couldn't read it..."

The professor blinked. Twice. "Are you in special classes son?"

Ken snorted with laughter, "No, honors classes are for geeks!"

"So!" Yohji stepped in, "You know a guy who can help us?"

Botan was still looking at Ken as he spoke, "No, I don't think so." Eyes flashed over to Yohji, " However, I do know someone who might be able to translate the tattoo." Yohji was rubbing his forehead with two fingers as Botan continued, "He's an old friend of mine and he specializes in linguistics like the tattoo you have on the back of your neck."

"Great!"

"Here." Botan handed Yohji a business card he had fished out of his wallet, ignoring Ken's little cheer, "This is his name and address. He lives in the West Hills not too far from here. I don't think you'll have any trouble finding it."

Yohji bowed graciously then rose again, "Thank you so much for all of your help, Professor Botan."

"Don't mention it."

"And you..." Botan smiled at Ken, "Good luck with the truck."

"What?"

After collecting Ken the two made their way outside to the car where Aya was waiting for them with a rather strange but grave expression displayed upon his sharp features that were usually blank. Letting Ken go, Yohji faltered in his steps then slowed down to carefully examine exactly what Aya was portraying with his poorly hidden expression. Aya was an open book if read correctly by the right people and, for the most part, Yohji was one of those people. The man held a ridged stance, which said that the phone call couldn't have been good by any stretch of the imagination and the expression he was giving the youth, Yohji could tell that the call was about him. Dread flew through his mind like a bat out of hell and he found himself conjuring up horrible thoughts of what could possibly have gone wrong this time. Was he going to get kicked out of his new home? Would he have to move again into some other crappy place with people who couldn't take care of animals let alone children? Part of his fretting mind didn't even -want- to know what placed that look upon the redhead's face but the greater part of his mind told him it was better if he found out.

"What's up?" Yohji swallowed hard.

"There's someone who wants to meet you."

~*~

8 pm.

Yohji looked like the poster boy for apathy despite the knots his stomach had tied itself so viciously into. He was nervous but he was also determined. No expression caressed his attractive features as he entered the restaurant with Aya just a step behind him. He wasn't about to give anyone the satisfaction of knowing just how out of sorts he really was with this meeting Aya had brought him too.

"We're the Ikari-san party, I believe reservations were already made." Aya was speaking for him, thank the gods for that. Yohji's voice probably would have cracked even if it -was- just the hostess and not the person he was here to meet. To say the kid was nervous wouldn't have even tipped the iceberg of how shot to hell his nerves really were. To be honest, he thought he might have to run to the bathroom any second now to dispel the non-existent food he didn't consume earlier. As much as it disgusted him, dry heaving over a toilet sounded like a better idea than this meeting. Then again, so did jumping in front of a train.

"Oh!" The Hostess smiled sweetly with a nod, "Right this way, gentlemen."

And they followed her to a secluded spot in the far back where an older man in a business suit sat quietly with his tea in hand. He didn't even look up until the two had stopped in front of the table. Another bout of nervous nausea shot down Yohji's spine as dark eyes looked up at them suddenly filled with shock and various other emotions. Yohji looked around for a bathroom sign.

"Hello Fujimiya-san..." Ikari rose to his feet and bowed to the both of them before rising quickly to steal a glance, or several glances for that matter, at Yohji, "Hello, son."

The blond's jaw tightened and so did his fists that he had previously balled his hands into, "Ikari-san." the green eyed boy spoke quickly then sat himself to the table without bothering to bow or utter another word in response.

"Good evening, Ikari-san." Aya bowed politely while looking over at the teenager before taking a seat next to him.

Yohji had always had fantasies about the evil things he would do when he finally met the bastard who had left his mother and him without a word. Staring down at the chopsticks that were set directly before him by their waitress, he felt himself smile evilly. How easy it would be to take one of those fine chop sticks and stab the man before him until he choked on his own blood and died. Justice served. Unfortunately, Yohji sighed to himself, Aya would be pissed if he did that and making Aya angry wasn't on his list of top ten things to do, especially because he saw what Aya did to people who he was angry with and it was -not- pretty.

"So how have you been?" The "father" figure spoke, looking interested in what Yohji actually had to say. Right.

"Fine..." The teen retorted shortly before lowering his voice, "No thanks to you." And it was then that there was a sudden stabbing pain in his leg which caused him to yelp with shock. It took a minute for him to realize what had actually happened and to his surprise he found that it was the redhead's fault.

"Are you okay?"

Yohji sent a glare in Aya's direction, "Yeah fine, just a cramp." Aya wasn't even looking at him. In fact, the man sat there drinking his tea acting completely nonchalant as if he hadn't just kicked him. What the hell was that redhead up to? A more sour expression appeared on Yohji's face and he finally had to turn away from the other when he took notice to the fact that his "father" was speaking to him again. It was only two minutes into their conversation and he was already irritated with the fact that the man was still speaking. Maybe he had been spending too much time with Aya. Speaking of Aya, he distantly wondered if Aya felt this way when he used to talk the man's ear off all the time.

"Amir?" The blond jumped and blinked a few times realizing that he had zoned out... again. Damn. He -really- needed to stop doing that.

"What?"

"I asked you how you were doing in school?"

"Fine, but you wouldn't know that would yo-OW!" He cried again as another kick was delivered under the table from Aya, whom he was ready to kick back any second now. Was Aya trying to censor him or something? That was so utterly ridiculous! What right did Aya have to try and censor him from telling his father flat out how he felt about him? Damn it. Why didn't Aya ever make any sense?

"Come again?"

"Fine. I'm doing fine." Yohji gritted through his teeth to the questioner.

"Oh." A short pause as the man obviously tried to come up with something to say. "Are you living with anyone right now?"

"I don't see why you ca~re" Once more he winced at a kick but was he was more bound and determined to get his say in this conversation whether Aya wanted it or not.

"You'd be surprised, Amir..."

"I doubt it. If you cared you wouldn't have left in the first place and gawd damn it Aya, would you STOP trying to play footsie with me right now?!"

"Son, look. I know you're mad at me..." Ikari looked rather pitiful in that moment as he leaned across the table to grip Yohji hands. All thoughts of Aya suddenly evaporated when he turned and glanced at his father. He was speechless. The man nearly had tears in his eyes but why? Where those tears of... remorse? Was he actually sorry or was this all some kind of act? God, why didn't -anything- make sense tonight? First Aya and now his.... father.

"... and I know your confused but this isn't how I wanted it to be." The man was still talking and Yohji had accidentally missed some of what he said... oops. "A long time ago, when you were very young, your mother and I... well..." He paused, perhaps looking for the right words, "We couldn't... exactly seem to agree on much and when we realized that these... disagreements... might have been affecting you negatively we decided that it would be best if I went away for a little while. You see, I work with a company over seas in America and so I traveled all the time, it wasn't hard to lose contact with you and your mother but, believe me Yohji, I had never meant to do it on purpose." Yohji stared at the man gripping his hands tighter.

His father had left under mutual agreement with his mother? It was partially his mother's idea? But then... why didn't he come back? Surely the man would have gotten news that his wife was dead or -someone- would have contacted him about it? Right?

"I had no forwarding addresses and I moved from place to place so often that it was too hard to track me down. On top of it all, since your mother and I were never -officially- married the police had no idea to contact me and inform me of her death..." And Yohji's world froze right there. His mother and father... were never married? No one had ever told him that but it suddenly all started to make sense.

"You must believe me when I tell you I had no idea she was dead..." Green eyes widened and for a moment the man simply stared at him. What was he looking at? Yohji leaned back in his seat a bit to put distance between this businessman and himself. Why did he have that strange expression? What was it he was seeing in him? Or was he even seeing -him- at all? Naturally the teenager's questions wouldn't be answered or at least not right away.

A heavy silence followed and Ikari seemed to shift uncomfortably in it,"I... I came back, several times to look for you both, you know." What? All of his life Yohji had believe that his father had just one day decided to leave and abandoned them because he wanted nothing more to do with either of them. He had built all of these thoughts and images of his father on the idea that the man wanted nothing to do with either of them and here that very man was telling him how wrong he was. His father actually... wanted him? A stab of pain rocked through his body and he felt as if he was choking. Why...? He shouldn't be sad but yet he could feel tears collecting before his eyes and his vision blurred. No. He wasn't going to cry. He refused to show weakness in front of this man and in front of ...Aya.

"I searched for years but it's hard to keep track of nomads with no official records. It... was really by sheer coincidence I ran across an old friend while I was in town and we got to talking about the old days and I asked him if he had seen you or your mother. He -" Ikari laughed shortly as he looked away but didn't loosen his grip over his son's hands, " -he looked at me so oddly then told me what all my other friends were afraid to bring up." A bitter expression took over the elder's features to make him seem livid with the idea that no one had brought up the death of Yohji's mother.

"Can you believe it? This whole time I thought you were both alive and well when I had no idea...." He seemed to waver in his speech as his eyes moved over the table in search of answers. "I was so angry that I hadn't known and no one had told me. They thought I knew and they were being sensitive to your mother's passing and the pain they thought it would bring up but Amir..." Ikari was looking at his son again, "How could I have known? I went to the police right away and began investigating what happened. It took me six months to track you down." Yohji shifted. Six months? Why so long? As if the Japanese man could read his mind, he cracked a smile and straightened, "It's not like we share the same last name or anything, you know." The boy hesitantly flashed him an unsure smile because he didn't know how else to respond. Ikari's smile grew, prompted by Yohji's "smile" though the business man lost his pleased expression in the instant he glanced over at Aya who was frowning darkly. Aya didn't seem pleased, in fact... he seemed quiet the opposite. Maybe because Aya was feeling as if the story was too straight forward, too... rehearsed?

"To make a long story short-" Ikari coughed a little, forcing his attention on Yohji, "Now that I have found you I - I want to make things better for you Amir... Yohji. I know these years have been hard on you so this is why I want to start over and give you a better life then you have been given. Please, I would like you to come and live with me... give me a chance to prove myself a worthy father and you won't ever have to live in pain again. Haven't you suffered enough... haven't I?" Were those real tears? Yohji pulled his hands from the other's and simply stared at him with a shocked but somewhat blank expression. He couldn't make heads or tails of this situation because it all was whirling around in his head at lightening speed. Was it all a fancy lie or was this man honestly sorry for what had happened and truely asking for forgiveness? He couldn't tell. He couldn't breathe. He had to get out and get out now.

"Excuse me." The blond got up quickly and rushed to the bathroom.

8:20pm

Leaning against one of the resturant's bathroom counters he looked at himself in the mirror and noted the lack of color on his face. He was half in panic for it all seemed like it was just too much at once. His whole life he had wanted nothing more than to kill the man out there but now that he finally had the chance... he found out his whole reasoning for wanting to kill him was based on delusions he must have made up as a child. Fantasies he had told himself to make the pain of his mother's death less intense. A child had to put blame for everything on something and since his father was absent he put blame on him; the man couldn't defend himself and so he was the perfect scapegoat. It was all a lie. Everything he thought he knew about that man was a lie. He didn't need anyone else in his life to betray him when he had himself to do all the work for them...

A knock at the door echoed throughout the bathroom and Yohji jumped, half throwing himself against a wall as a tall red head entered the facility.

"Yohji, Ikari-san was worried that he said something wrong to- " the man paused as he approached him, "What's wrong?" The statement was flat but he knew Aya was genuinely asking because he cared. Aya never asked questions that he didn't want answered or didn't care about. Aya was frank in everything he did and he probably always would be. The bluntness was a nice contrast to the rest of the world's bullshit.

"N-nothing." Yohji stammered and looked down so Aya couldn't see his eyes, a habit he had picked up as a child. Somewhere in his growing up with Aya he had figured that if Aya could look in his eyes then he would know for sure if Yohji was telling the truth or lying. He, to this day, still believed that.

"Liar." Yohji's head snapped up at the word and he suddenly realized how close the redhead was standing in front of him.

"I'm not-" came the inevitable protest but it was stopped short as Aya put the tips of his fingers to Yohji's lips in order to silence him, simultaneously causing Yohji's heart to skip a couple of beats. "Get yourself together or else he is going to think something is seriously wrong..."

Yohji silently watched him, not daring to respond even after the hand removed itself and no longer stopped him from speaking. And so they stood there, looking at each other for a long moment in silence, standing hardly a breath's space apart while each tried their damnedest to figure the other out. Strangely enough, the only person Yohji was used to being in close spaces with was Aya so why was it now that he suddenly felt his heart racing and his stomach clenched with butterflies ? Had something changed between them that he was unaware of?

The main door of the bathroom creaked open and the trance broke causing Aya to step aside and motion for Yohji to leave. The teen slowly nodded and wordlessly together they walked back to the table to resume a conversation, though Yohji's father had decided at that point that taking a lighter approach to everything might be a wise idea. So the three talked about computers and work and sports and seemingly other trivial things. Yohji had never been so glad to be having a superficial conversation with -anyone- let alone his father and much to his surprise it really did lighten the mood and relax him a little. Why? Because meaningless topics were safe. No hurt feelings... no memories.... no pain lay in meaningless topics.

"I hope to see you again soon, Am-Yohji." Ikari bowed to his son and rose then repeated the process with Aya, "Take care, Fujimiya-san."

They both returned the bow before departing, heading for Aya's car in deathly still silence. Oh blissful silence. The world held so much noise but Aya never did. Then again, Aya never did a lot of things.

"What are you thinking about?"

You. "Love."

"What?"

"I realize I don't love my father because I don't know him at all. Is that wrong? I mean, how does one go about loving a stranger?" Yohji was looking out the window so he missed the glance sent in his direction, "You know... I always thought my father was one thing but now... I guess he's another."

"Well you were young back then but, to me at least, he seemed like someone who wanted to get back with a son he had lost many years ago..."

"Aya..." enlarged jade colored eyes stared widely at the driver of the car who was doing his best to not look at them.

"I think..." Aya cleared his throat and downshifted, "You've got a good chance for change with your father."

Slowly the car pulled up to the curb at the side of a hideous building partly in shambles just begging to be torn down. This is was hell and currently this was home.

"Not just change... life." A life without this hell hole. "Thank you, Aya." Yohji opened the car door and smiled gently as he looked at Aya and for once, Aya really looked back, "For everything..."

It always seemed to rain in Tokyo....

.... tonight was no exception.

tbc