Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ Sanity Forgotten ❯ Chapter 1

Title: Sanity Forgotten

Authors: Makoto Sagara and Skeren Dreamera

Archive: www.afallenangel.net/makotosagara/frames/fanfiction.html www.fanfiction.net, www.foreverfandom.net (under Makoto Sagara), www.gundam-wing-fanfiction.net, www.mediaminer.org, and www.nfiction.net, (under Skeren Dreamera)

Category: Shounen ai, Drama

Rating: R

Pairings: Farfarello + Schu, Schu + Brad

Contact: SagaraMakoto@aol.com and Mickeofas@yahoo.com

Warnings: Shounen ai, OOC, angst, blood, BDMS, language, Farfarello

Disclaimers: Neither of us own Weiß Kreuz nor make any money from this collaboration. Suing is so pointless... We're both broke. Praise be to Koyasu Takehito!

A/N: Now it's time to watch Schwarz, and see just what goes on during an... off day.

.

Part one

Schuldig climbed out of the shower, toweling off and wrapping the cloth around his head before walking out. Naked as the day he was born. He didn't care that he lived with three other men. If they had a problem, oh well, that was on them. He walked to his room, whistling a German folk song, and smiled. Brad should come out right about....

And Crawford indeed lived up to expectations, dodging a fairly well set trap that had been placed inside his desk. Only a split second of vision had saved him from being soaked, but clearly that didn't stop Schuldig from trying. It also didn't mean he expected what he saw when he charged into Schuldig's room to chew him out. His voice was effectively halted before he shored himself up. "Why do you persist in doing that?"

//In doing vhat, mien leader?// Schuldig thought to Brad, not feeling the need to talk as he snorted.

Crawford had to think about it, and effectively reestablished his nearly impenetrable shielding before Schuldig could tell his defenses were down. "In rigging my things with traps."

Schuldig smirked. //Because it's amusing to see you jump, Crawford.// He looked down at himself, still naked. //Like vhat you see, or shall I get dressed?//

Crawford scowled over getting caught and turned his back to leave the room. "Get some clothes on."

"Of course, mien leader," the German replied sassily.

Crawford just smirked. "Farfarello is out; just thought I'd warn you."

//Should I ask?//

"You wouldn't get an answer." Crawford's rare sense of humor struck again as he walked out of the room, laughing to himself.

Schuldig laughed to himself as he pulled on a pair of tight black jeans and a green shirt to offset his eyes, skipping any sort of underwear, as was normal. He then pulled the towel off his head, dried his hair and pulled it back. Time to find the small one so he could play with him. //Crawford?//

~Is there something you needed? I'm busy.~ The reply didn't seem like it was from inside the apartment, and there was another mental chuckle before the connection was cut from Crawford's end.

//Busy, mien arse. Where's the kid?//

There was firmly no reply, and Schuldig couldn't pick out the information either. Damn shielding training. This was about when Crawford's warning came in handy since a slightly chaotic maelstrom of thoughts trounced on Schuldig from behind.

The German scowled and held his head. //What the hel was that?// His thoughts were transmitted to everyone in the house still. Nagi ran out of his room.

"What was what, Schu-kun?"

"There's these violent thoughts invading my head," he swore, cursing in German as they hit him again.

"CRAWFORD-SAN!!" Nagi watched helplessly as Schuldig passed out on the floor.

The only answer was Farfarello, hereafter referred to as Jei to Schuldig, came out of his room, loose black shirt askew and a blade twirled absently as his fingers as he looked at the redhead. "It worked."

Nagi glared up at Farfarello. "Nani? What worked," he asked, using his powers to lift Schuldig enough to half-carry, half-drag the redhead back to his room.

"I tried to project after dropping my shields. When the sun is bright, and the heavens are clear, I want to share the misery and must know how." He grinned, that ever present eye patch of his making the expression look evil as well as crazy. "You'd like I should carry him instead?"

"Could you please? Someone's been hitting the chocolate too much lately," Nagi said, shoving the unconscious man to the Irish psychopath. "I'm going back to my room, since this isn't an emergency."

Jei laughed, scooping up the redhead after tucking the knife away at his hip. He was all too pleased to take the redhead, and he then headed to his own room. He'd never managed to get him alone and unconscious before.

Schuldig moaned and reached a hand to his head. "Mien Goht! Vhat happened?"

Jei chuckled, setting the redhead up against the corner and starting to attach the restraints before the redhead fully gained his faculties.

There was only another rusty chuckle, as the redhead found his arms lifted and his wrists restrained. He was being quickly immobilized. It must have been all Jei's practice at getting out.

//Do I have to call Brad in here?// he projected, feeling a raw surge of panic hitting him.

"You think the all seeing one does not know that the flame is here with me?" His golden eye lifted to meet Schuldig's, a wide smile on his face as he stepped back, surveying his work.

Schuldig tried his best to pull on the chains, but to no avail. //What's your game, Farfarello?//

"Do you know what I feel with these?" It was an amazingly sane question as Jei held up the knife, twirling it centimeters before Schuldig's nose.

Schuldig blinked, shoving his panic down. //With what?// He wished he had his gun.

Jei released an exaggerated sigh, kneeling in front of Schuldig as he trailed the knife-edge over the redhead's skin. "What does the bright one think that is meant?"

The redhead shivered at the knife's contact and the amazing show of sanity from the Irishman. //The restraint, I assume.//

"No. I feel not these things the way it ought be. I was robbed, I say. From the church til now I feel nothing of pain, nor else." He twirled the knifepoint against Schuldig's shoulder, cutting easily through his shirt with the blade.

Schuldig shuddered as his favorite shirt was ruined. //Dammit. What's your game, Farf? I know you don't feel pain, so what are you trying to do to me?//

"Did you like my mind bright one?" Jei slid the knife down, liberally destroying the material. He also left a faint line of cut skin, the knife being too sharp for it to be immediately felt.

"That was you?" the German yelled aloud, feeling the rest of his shirt being desecrated. "Mien Goht!"

"You couldn't tell?" Jei seemed genuinely surprised by this, gold eye looking back to Schuldig's blue.

//It was too sudden. I didn't have enough time before you made me pass out,// Schuldig mentally shouted, finding it hard to remember how to speak out loud anymore.

"Do you remember any of it all? Did you see any reason behind me?" Jei leaned in, grinning a bit before creating another line of blood up a different section of chest revealed from the shredded shirt.

//I remember screaming. Lots of screaming and terror. As far as reason, are you kidding me?// He winced as he noticed that he was bleeding. //It's bad enough you cut yourself, now you have to cut me too?//

"But you didn't feel the fact that I cut you, did you? It's all like that. Painless, pleasure less. Just the screams, the words, the blood..." Jei smirked, leaning down to lap a bit of the blood from Schuldig, seeming to roll it over his tongue. "I've never before tasted you."

Schuldig's eyes grew large as he felt the white haired man's tongue on his chest. //If this is your idea of seduction, Jei, we need to talk,// he said, his mental voice sounding a bit more normal. //What do I taste like?//

Jei looked at him through a slitted eye, lips dark from the blood. "You taste dark, as though having captured the embers of a fire in your skin." He tilted his head, giving Schuldig a faint smile. "Do you know I can taste each difference so?"

//Dark? What kind of answer is that?// Schuldig moved around, trying to forget the way his body woke up with each action the other man did. //How can you?//

"Look in my head, I know you can feel what I feel, should you try." Jei was still level with the cuts and he lifted the sharp knife, giving it another flick over the uncut skin.

Schuldig moaned as the knife separated his skin and tried to reach into the other's mind. What he saw was... scary, and disturbing, but even a bit sane. The cooper taste of the blood was actually sweet, like dark chocolate, but there was a spicy taste as well. //That... That is what I taste like?// he asked, moaning again.

"Yes, but feel, do you see how there is nothing? I can feel your texture, and know your taste, but... There is nothing else there." Yes, it was his way of showing an interest, but he knew no other way to do so.

//Yes, I saw...// The rest of his comment was cut off by the way his blood was trickling down his chest. //What do you want from me, Jei?//

Hearing his own name, the name of his sanity, brought the gold eye up to look Schuldig full in the face. "I do not know."

//You... don't know? Schieße! Then let me go!//

"I want to learn what things I do not have... You can do this." Jei dipped his head, flicking his tongue to collect more blood.

//What?// He groaned and threw his head back, striking it against the wall. //Ouch. Hurt. Fuck, Jei, what do you want to know?//

"Yes that, and pleasure... could you show me? Could you give me what I'm missing?" There was something there, his sanity left it deep, his gift being his curse, and he knew it.

//Give you... I'm not really sure what you're asking me... Do you want me to fuck you?//

Jei laughed a bit, giving him a sad look. "Would that make me able to learn what it's like to feel?" He'd been able to, once, a faint memory. Why he chose this day to corner Schuldig about it though... he didn't know.

//I don't know...// Schuldig replied, watching the Irishman warily. //Why are you so desperate, today of all days?//

Jei pulled back, really thinking about it. He counted to himself the days in the month and then looked back to Schuldig before shaking his head. "It's my birthday."

//Your birthday?? We didn't even know. The kid kept hounding Brad about that, saying he wanted to buy you a gift. So what can I do for you?// Schuldig felt a bit back in his element, smirking as the control moved slightly in his corner.

"I already said, but can even you help me, little flame?" Jei punctuated the words with another swipe of his knife, down the thigh of Schuldig's pants, cutting skin and fabric as he moved back.

Schuldig hissed as his thigh was opened. //Why me?//

"The mind can give what the body cannot." Another flick of the knife accompanied his words, and Jei laughed, once, before undoing the bonds holding Schuldig in place.

Schuldig rubbed his wrists where the restraints had chaffed. //You're asking me to transmit what I feel to you during sex?//

Jei tipped his head to the side. "I've never bothered with sex. Is that the only time you can do that?" Jei grinned, his insane glee slowly tucking that glimmer of sanity back into hiding. It wasn't gone, just hidden. "You look pretty like that."

"Pretty? I don't look pretty," Schuldig said, scowling as he rubbed his abused flesh. "And no, but you asked for something that I have no idea what to do with."

"You could try, and the blood makes you look like you're on fire." Jei reached out, running his fingers through the blood before running a bloody fingertip over Schuldig's lip. "The difference."

"English, man! Speak plainly, or I leave."

"I never speak clearly. It isn't expected so for this one to do that. Simple then. Taste your own blood. Tell the difference. Would you dare to get to know me so well to share that?" Jei ran his fingers over Schuldig's chest, only feeling the texture and temperature of the blood and skin. "And this with me?"

"To share what? My blood?"

Jei glared at Schuldig, wondering if he hadn't dazed him more than he'd thought with projecting like that. "I know thoughts are intrinsic to you; if you are willing to help with me, are you willing to become more like me?"

"You mean a barmy lunatic? Sorry, already down that road, Jei," Schu said, raising a hand to his head, examining the rather nice lump growing from where he struck it.

"Anyone can become insane. Are you willing?" Jei moved back, getting to his feet and moving so he was leaning on the wall directly beside the other. "Will you be my clouds?"

Schuldig shook his head. //You make no sense... Your clouds? Didn't I say simple?//

"I don't do simple. Were I simple, you wouldn't consider it." Jei laughed a bit, twirling a knife in his hands.

//Could you be less... barking loony, then? My head is killing me, thanks to you.//

"No. Just don't try and look so deep. The deeper you look, the worse it will be." Jei brought up his shields. They were for Schuldig, not himself.

Schuldig rolled his eyes. //Thank you, for that wonderful observation, Farfarello.// He stood, wobbling a little, but staying straight. //I'm going to go lay down. In my own room. Guten tag.// He walked towards the door, ignoring the interesting things on the floor.

Jei just laughed, leaning back into the wall. "I should have gotten your back too, given you demon wings."

"Nien," Schuldig replied, opening the door, and heading to his room quickly. //Crawford, your pet needs a new leash,// he projected to the precognitive man, before passing out on his bed.

Crawford moved into the apartment again as he heard that, a smirk working it's way across his face. "I think the old one is working just fine actually."

Nagi came out of his room as the he heard more motion, and walked up to Brad. "What's going on?"

Crawford looked to Nagi and tilted his head. "We're going shopping."

"Shopping? For what? Do you know what's wrong with Schu?"

"It's Farfarello's birthday." Crawford opened the door, locking it behind them before heading towards the car.

"Honto ni? I asked you guys like months ago, and nobody told me a damn thing," Nagi said, feeling left out of things because of his age.

I just found out, as did Schuldig." Crawford started the car, driving off towards the mall.

"Schu found out? I thought Farfarello took him to his room? How did he find out?"

"He told him. I thought you liked Schuldig more than to let Farfarello make off with him." Crawford sounded amused.

"Not when that German nuisance has been eating too much German chocolate. It would be easier trying to pick you up," Nagi commented, making a face. "What did Farf do to him?"

"There should be blood between their rooms when we get back." Crawford pulled the car to a stop, getting out.

"Great... So, what are we getting Farf? I was thinking another knife, but after that piece of news, I'm starting to reconsider my decision."

"That's why we came to the mall." Crawford beeped the car before heading towards the building.

"Of course," Nagi replied dumbly, following behind the taller American. "Brad, slow down. I'm not as tall as you are."

Crawford let out a deep breath, then turned and glared at Nagi. "Don't call me that."

"Sorry, Crawford-san," he snapped, looking around the mall for something to get his... unusual teammate.

"Just don't pick up anymore bad habits from Schuldig." Crawford looked around, doing much the same as Nagi.

"But... Never mind," he muttered, stopping off at a trendy American shop called Hot Topic. "Think Farfarello would like a new collar?"

Crawford gave the idea some serious thought there. "Not from that store, he'd never forgive the cheap leather. But... It's a good idea. Come on."

Nagi just shrugged, ignoring the looks he was receiving from the clientele of the store.

Crawford turned, leaving the store, and then heading for a store he'd seen in the huge mall before.

The small brunette, who in turn was followed by a few giggling girls and a few curious boys, followed him.

Crawford saw the group, and smirked. It should be interesting to see if their expressions lived up to expectations... Ahh, there was the S and M store. He didn't even pause before walking in, knowing all the more adult items were stored in the back.

Nagi blinked as he saw the store, and stopped outside. "Ah, Crawford-san, I can't go in there," he said, looking behind to see the group, which caused him to scowl.

Crawford turned, reaching over and taking Nagi's arm before bodily pulling him into the store. "You can't go in the back, but the things out here are relatively safe, just clothes, see?"

Nagi blushed at the assortment. "Sure, right, just clothes." He fingered a strange looking corset. "Isn't this something a dominatrix would wear?"

Crawford glanced over. "No, more like slave wear. Look at the rest of it."

Nagi's eyes grew to the size of dinner plates. "Can we... just get this thing and go?"

Crawford looked to Nagi, then to the bold followers who'd dared trail him in, before gesturing over to the collars. "Pick one then, it was your idea."

Nagi looked at the collars, and found one with some interesting studs in the shape of crosses. "I think that one," he said, pointing to it, but not touching.

Crawford nodded, going to get the clerk. He didn't know if it was a display version or not.

Nagi glared at his entourage, before grinning cheekily and sticking out his tongue. They may have followed him, but he wasn't going to let them win.

Crawford returned with a bag in hand, tapping Nagi's shoulder. "We can go now."

Nagi nodded. "Okay. Can we get something for Schu too?"

Crawford looked at Nagi with mild shock, which was quickly concealed. "What did you have in mind?"

"Well, besides a new first aid kit, how about a new shirt. I bet Farf shredded the one he was wearing, and that's his favorite."

Crawford laughed, nodding a bit. "Sounds like a good idea." Of course, that sound likely startled poor Nagi nearly to death, Crawford didn't laugh. No, no, no.

Nagi blinked after his shock. "O~kay, Twilight Zone, check. I know just where to go too," he replied, walking quickly away from Brad and into a trendy European shop that blasted techno music. In the back, he found a soft green silk shirt, much like the one Schuldig had been wearing, but it had some funky square buttons. He snatched a medium and took it to the clerk, paid for it, and returned, all before Crawford had caught up with him. "Alright. Done, and done."

"I got Farfarello a present while you were in there. A new leash." He gestured over towards the pet store he'd buzzed in, then out of again.

Nagi snorted. "Methinks that was Schu's idea."

"I haven't had time to talk to Schuldig about gifts yet actually." Crawford smirked. "Anything else you need to get?"

"Not this time. I'll have Schu come along next time," Nagi said, sticking out his tongue and running towards the exit. For some reason, he had too much energy, and that wasn't a good idea for someone with his powers.

Crawford brought his step back to normal, following after his smaller teammate.

Nagi watched Crawford as he strolled back to the car. "Do you think Farf left Schu alone after he cut him?"

"No." Crawford unlocked the car, climbing in. He had a decent idea as to what happened, but only could confirm with his own two eyes. "You were in the house, didn't you check on them?"

"Didn't think about that..." Nagi trailed off, thinking. "All I saw was you coming back out of your room and then we left."

"I had to get some money. I'd just returned from doing something else." Crawford's smirk widened a fraction.

Nagi nodded absentmindedly, looking out the window, and trying to reach out to Schuldig through their link. There was silence on the other end, which could have meant one of two things. Schuldig was either dead, which was impossible, or asleep, which Nagi wouldn't blame him for. Dealing with Farfarello was a bit much sometimes.

Crawford couldn't help but shake his head at Nagi's pensive expression. "We wouldn't have left if I'd foreseen Schuldig dying."

"I know that.... It's just... Well, Farfarello can just... He's not predictable."

"No, he isn't predictable, but he has yet to try to kill any of us." Crawford skillfully left the parking lot for the apartment.

"There's always a first time for everything," Nagi muttered under his breath, wishing he was back at the apartment already.

"I thought bad feelings were my job." Crawford sounded almost... amused.

"There's always a first time for everything," Nagi repeated, scowling.

"Yes, there is. Though, I think you'll be pleased to know that I doubt Schuldig got offered death." Crawford was turning over the bit of the future he'd gotten. Certainly didn't look like Schuldig was about to die to him.

"Oh, that's a comforting thought," Nagi said sourly. "Weiß has been quiet lately."

Crawford considered that. "I don't know; we've had little to do recently as well."

"Not that I'm complaining. Something about Taketori makes me nervous."

"Taketori is a leach." Crawford parked the car, turning off the engine.

"Well, at least he doesn't look at you like you're prime rib, or great sushi," Nagi said, getting out of the car with his present for Schuldig.

"I'm too old for his tastes." Crawford collected the other bag before locking up the car.

"Yes, but Nagi-kun is just right, isn't that correct," he spat, going up to their apartment.

"In a year or two he'll stop eyeing you like that." Crawford took out his keys, remembering he'd locked the door.

"Not bloody likely..."

"You mean to say you doubt you'll age?" Crawford's lips twitched. With a power like Nagi's he knew the boy would never be tall, but he would mature, surely.

"I might age, but I'll always be petit... and I have this feeling that I will always look younger than I am. Who in their right mind believes I'm 16 right now?" he asked as the door was opened, and he went directly to Schuldig's room, noticing the small drops of blood on the floor.

"Good point." Crawford went seeking the white haired Irishman, finding him sprawled out over the floor in front of the television. He decided to sit in his chair, considering the nature show that Farfarello had picked.

Nagi opened the door, and found the German man sprawled clumsily over his bed, fast asleep. Sighing, he readjusted the other's position and left the bag on the desk in the room before leaving.

Crawford waited patiently for Nagi to join them in the living room.

Nagi waltzed into the room with the two older men, and looked at the way Farfarello was stretched across the floor. "Farf? What are you doing?"

"Watching the show on the minions of God." Farfarello didn't even look up.

"Minions of God?" Nagi blinked. He should have been used to Farfarello's odd behavior, but this was just strange.

Crawford gestured to the television where the nature show about squirrels and rabbits was playing. "Do you have your portion of his gift? I'm not about to give mine before yours."

Nagi snorted as he saw the furry rodents on the screen. "Aa. Naruhodo." He blinked and then pulled out the other bag. "Yep, right here," he said happily, handing the plastic sack to the Irishman. "Happy Birthday, Farf."

Crawford added his own portion as Farfarello stared at them in no little shock before dumping out the collar and chain leash. "Thanks to my fellow helpers."

Nagi snorted again. "Have fun with the toys, Farf. I've still got a report to work on. Crawford-san, perhaps you can help me?"

Crawford gave a slight smirk as Farfarello cut off his reply before he could start. "It is wise to bring the sign of gods pain here, that shows the true falsehood of god." Then the Irishman put on the collar, wrapping the leash about his arm.

Crawford just shook his head. "I'll help with your report Nagi."

"I thought you'd like it, Farf-kun," Nagi replied, and then turning to Crawford. "After dinner. I need to finish my trigonometry homework first." He left with a slight bow, feeling the familiar tickle of Schuldig's mental touch. //Schu-schu? Are you ok?//

//Ah, must you call me that? Where's the crazy one and the anal one?//

//Celebrating Farf's birthday with gifts.//

//Good, I'm staying here. Thank you for the shirt.//

//No problem, but you're helping me with my German homework later.//

//Fine.// The connection was cut, and Nagi had to laugh. Things were fine.

Farfarello looked over at Crawford and snickered. "I'll find a way to turn the leash against God." Meaning, I'll find a use for it. Crawford nodded back before leaving the room to make dinner.

Schuldig peeked out of his room, finding the hallway clear, and waltzed to the bathroom, determined to get some of this blood off of him. All the cuts were superficial, but they stung, and his previous clothes where ruined. He made sure that he had his hardly used robe, and shut the door behind him. He let out a sigh of relief. There was no sign of the crazy Irishman, and he could actually clean off in peace.

Said Irishman had decided to clip the leash to his collar before letting it unravel and was in search of the same redhead that was trying to dodge him. Not finding him in his room, he closed the door and stretched out over the covers, promptly falling asleep.

Schuldig decided against going back to his room. Something told him that danger led that way, so he walked into the kitchen, finding Brad cooking. "Mien leader, your pet has gone too far," he hissed, reaching into the refrigerator and grabbing something to drink. "Did you get him a new leash like I said?"

Crawford nodded a bit. "He's wearing it." He glanced over. "Just what did he do to you exactly?"

//You mean besides shredding my favorite shirt and jeans? He chained me to his freaking wall and cut me like I was a side of beef,// he snapped mentally, his English too broken to say it out loud.

"You don't look like he cut you up to me." Crawford flicked a glance over Schuldig.

Schuldig lifted his new shirt, showing the cuts on his chest. //I'd show you the other ones, but there are children running around.//

"That isn't so bad, with how sharp he keeps his knives it likely didn't even hurt." Not what Schuldig would want to hear, but Crawford couldn't resist.

//Fuck you. Let him cut you then,// he nearly growled into the other's mind. He took his beer out into the living room and turned the TV from the animal channel to an action movie in German.

Crawford merely shook his head, going back to his cooking. Farfarello didn't come out of Schuldig's bedroom either.

Nagi came out of his room, and found Schuldig in the living room. //You know, I've always wanted to really understand what the hell they were saying.//

//Then shut up and listen,// Schuldig snapped, his mood still foul.

Crawford spoke up from the kitchen. "The food is finished."

Nagi nearly ran into the kitchen. "What is Schu's problem? He nearly scrambled my brain yelling at me."

"He's upset over how I took what happened with Farfarello." Crawford turned to the stove ,scooping his portion into a bowl.

"What did he expect you to do," Nagi inquired. "Were you supposed to defend his honor or something?"

"I think he was upset that I observed it likely didn't hurt." Crawford got Nagi a bowl, handing it to him.

"But, it probably stung at first..." Nagi trailed off, shutting his mouth before he said too much. "There was a lot of blood on his bed though."

Crawford looked to Nagi before getting a bottle of juice and taking it out to Schuldig with his own food. "Drink that."

Schuldig glared at the American before taking in the offering. //You know, it's people like you that make others hate Americans,// he said calmly, with a hint of humor as he took the food and juice from the tall black haired man.

"Was that supposed to bother me?" Crawford moved back into the kitchen to get himself another bowl before sitting down across from Schuldig.

"Nien, stating the obvious," Schuldig said aloud, watching as a car blew up on the screen while he ate.

"So it was not." Crawford got to eating, looking around. "Where did Farfarello get to?"

"Don't know. Rather not think about it, thank you," Schuldig said before downing half the contents of his beer can.

Crawford nodded a bit. "Of course."

//Smug, pompous American,// he projected, going to get another beer, and ignoring the juice Crawford brought him. //Sorry, Nagi. Brad's an ass, but that's not your fault. You just got in the way,// he thought as he saw the kid eating in the kitchen.

"Why aren't you drinking the juice that Crawford-san brought you?"

//Because I'd rather not. Seen the psycho anywhere?//

"No..."

"Good. Danke," he replied, going back into the living room with a new beer.

To be continued.