Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ School Days ❯ Ken, the poorly crafted Naughty Nurse ( Chapter 5 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

By: Pokiehl

Warning! Ken in drag ^^

~*Schuldig's POV*~

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 8:30am*~

Schuldig huffed and blew a tuft of hair away from his face. He HAD to watch detention today!!! Schu growled low in his throat and surveyed his class. There were only two students today. Two students.

Schuldig bared his teeth and looked the two young boys over. There was little Nagi… so quiet, so gentle. Bull. And then there was Omi; he was a little anorexic and all, but he was all right.

Nagi was sitting in front of Omi, and was nervously twirling his thumbs. It was obvious this was his first time in detention. Schu grinned wickedly and picked up a piece of chalk then walked to the board.

"Now," he began, "let's begin. Do you like to look up definitions, my little trouble makers?"

Omi and Nagi nodded.

"Good. Because, you'll be looking them up. A lot of them."

Schu heard somebody sigh unhappily.

"How many?" one of the boys asked.

"Oh, about five hundred."

"Ugh…"

"I know. You think you have it bad, at least you don't have to teach all day long."

"It doesn't seem all that hard."

"Like you guys would listen to us."

Then Schuldig stopped writing various page numbers on the board. He blinked. Had he and his student just conversed? No, it couldn't be. Could it?

"Uh," he stammered, "go to these pages in your Health book and look up every word that's in bold print." ((a.n. this happened to me once ^_^))

Two groans filled the air, and Schuldig promptly ignored them.

"No talking, groaning, moaning, sighing, coughing, sneezing, or loud breathing… unless you want to look up a thousand," he said stiffly.

There, that should kill off any bonds he might have made.

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 12:00pm*~

There was utter silence in the room. Odd, unbelievable, ear-bursting silence. Schu couldn't take it anymore! He was used to loud voices, snide remarks, and yelling; never before had he heard such… silence.

So many hours had gone by in total silence. The students actually did their work. In fact, they never made a move to look at each other, but, Schu noticed how Nagi let his hand slip off of the arm of his desk, and Omi was gripping it loosely.

Aw, how cute.

"No touching!" Schu barked.

The two boys looked up quickly, startled by the sudden outburst, and pulled their hands back onto their desks.

Schu smiled. It was so freakin' awesome to be a teacher. The boys both sighed, and started to write once again.

"Didn't I say no sighing?? Look up a hundred more!"

The boys gasped.

"But Mr. Schuldig!" Nagi argued. "What problem can sighing cause? It's not fair!"

"Oh, you want to go for two hundred more?"

"No, but I'm just saying it's not fair! Sighing is kind of an automatic thing… you can't give us extra work for something we can't control."

Schu snarled. "I said a hundred! And unless you want two hundred you'll get to work!"

Omi sat back in his desk and threw his hands into the air, and resumed writing. Nagi quietly went back to his work. And all was well again.

Bradley's POV

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 8:30am*~

Bradley was in his office, filling out important papers from the Board of Education. He smiled wickedly as he wrote in different notes with his pen; he loved this pen! What other pen can give you nudity and ink at the same time??? He'd never given the waitress back her pen… because he'd decided to keep it. It was very lovely once you sat down and looked at it.

"You better not let Schu catch you with that pen," a tiny voice said. Bradley make an 'ack' noise and looked up from his writing.

"Who said that?" he asked.

"Me."

"Who's 'me'?"

"Me."

Bradley's eyebrow twitched. And the voice sighed.

"Look on your shoulder and you'll see me."

Bradley blinked, turned his head to his shoulder, and gasped. Sitting there, with his leg's crossed, was a mini-Schuldig! How cute!!!!!!!!

"I'm your conscience," Mini-Schu said.

"My conscience??"

"Yup. You know, I tell you how to live the right way. I hate that kind of bull crap, so I'll tell you wrong from right, but I won't tell you what decisions to make. How's that? It'll make my job easier anyway."

Bradley nodded his head. "Where were you all those other times I needed you?"

"Huh? Oh, I dunno. Somewhere I guess. Well, c'mon! Let's go make mischief!"

"Make mischief? How? Where?"

"I dunno… we'll go where ever the wind blows us."

Bradely nodded and stood from his desk. Mini-Schu held up his hand.

"Hey, how 'bout you stick your tongue in that light socket over there?" Mini-Schu asked while pointing to the plug-in over near Bradley's desk.

"Wouldn't that… kill me?" Bradley asked.

"I dunno. I'll give you a dollar!"

"You're willing to pay me to commit suicide?"

"Yeah."

"Maybe some other day…"

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 12:00pm*~

Bradley was the wheel of his new SUV. Mini-Schu had talked him into buying it. Heck, Bradley had even got it for half off because Mini-Schu taught him how to haggle.

So now, Bradley was cruising the streets, banging his head to some music he'd never heard before. Mini-Schu was relaxing on his shoulder, with a mini-margarita in his hand.

"You know, I would be fired if I was caught out of school right now," Bradley said while continuing to drive.

Mini-Schu shrugged. "So?"

Bradley sighed as the SUV pulled up behind an old looking van. Bradley had to slow his speed to a good 15 mph.

Mini-Schu growled as he slung his mini-margarita at the windshield, making it leave a tiny green smudge on the glass. "It figures we'd get stuck behind some nut. I bet he's like 80 some years old…"

Bradley strained his eyes to see the sticker on the back of the van. "How's my driving…?" he read aloud.

Mini-Schu snorted. "Yeah, call 1-800-Get-The-Fuck-Off-The-Road!"

Bradley blinked in Mini-Schu's direction.

"No, I don't have road rage!" Mini-Schu bit out sharply.

"I didn't ask…" Bradley said softly, being a wee bit hurt. This was going to be a tough drive home…

Nagi's POV

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 8:30am*~

Today sucked. It was Friday! Supposively the best day of the week. But no, Nagi had detention… But. At least he'd gotten it with Omi-chan! Nagi was currently sitting in front of Omi, and was twining his thumbs together, just to give him something to do.

'Omi sure smells nice…' Nagi thought shyly as he sniffed the air. He loved the way Omi's cologne smelled. 'So manly!' he thought again, and giggled like a schoolgirl.

Then, Mr. Schuldig stood up and walked to the board, chalk in hand.

"Now," he began, "let's begin. Do you like to look up definitions, my little trouble makers?"

Omi and Nagi nodded.

"Good. Because, you'll be looking them up. A lot of them."

Nagi sighed unhappily. He hated looking up definitions; he figured if he lied about liking them, he'd get out of looking them up.

"How many?" Omi asked, sounding slightly agitated over something.

"Oh, about five hundred."

"Ugh…"

"I know. You think you have it bad, at least you don't have to teach all day long."

"It doesn't seem all that hard."

"Like you guys would listen to us."

Then Mr. Schuldig stopped writing the different page numbers on the board. He paused. Nagi blinked. Weird. Nagi took the opportunity to turn his head sideways and peek at Omi. Mmm… delicious.

"Uh," Mr. Schuldig stammered, "go to these pages in your Health book and look up every word that's in bold print."

Omi and Nagi groaned at the same time, and pulled out their paper and pencils to begin working.

"No talking, groaning, moaning, sighing, coughing, sneezing, or loud breathing… unless you want to look up a thousand," Mr. Schuldig said like the bossy snot he was.

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 12:00pm*~

It was so creepy to be in here with Mr. Schuldig. He didn't make any noise… except for that weird clicking noise his eyes made when he blinked. Eww. There wasn't any sound in the room… except for that horrible clicking.

Nagi was afraid to look at Omi; he'd heard the other boy's light breathing, and it made his heart flutter. Then, Nagi had a plan! Omi's hand was already hanging off of his desk (more than likely out of exhaustion), and Nagi let his hand slip off of the arm of his desk. Omi's hand brushed against his and Nagi nearly smiled. They clasped hands and continued their work.

"No touching!" Mr. Schuldig barked.

Omi and Nagi looked up quickly, startled by the sudden outburst, and pulled their hands back onto their desks.

The horrible teacher smiled.

'He must think it's awesome to be a teacher…' Nagi thought bitterly.

Both boys sighed, and started to write once again.

"Didn't I say no sighing?? Look up a hundred more!"

The boys gasped.

"But Mr. Schuldig!" Nagi argued. "What problem can sighing cause? It's not fair!"

"Oh, you want to go for two hundred more?"

"No, but I'm just saying it's not fair! Sighing is kind of an automatic thing… you can't give us extra work for something we can't control."

Mr. Schuldig snarled angrily. "I said a hundred! And unless you want two hundred you'll get to work!"

Nagi heard Omi sigh, and he saw two hands go up into the air. Nagi hook his head and went back to work. How many more hours was there of this??? Like three? Ugh.

Ken's POV

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 8:30am*~

Ken-Ken giggled as he looked over his reflection in the mirror. He hadn't gone to school today, because Ran-chan was sick. So it was time for Ken to play nurse!

And nurse he did play. For Ran gave Ken to money to buy a skimpy nurse outfit... the kind that looked like you could use them for a sling shot if you stretched them far enough. The kind that were pink and had the little hats. The kind Ran-chan asked for specifically.

So now, Ken-Ken was in his tiny nurse uniform, and was taking Ran's temperature with a thermometer.

"Now, Ran-chan, are you feeling any better?" Ken asked as he pulled the thermometer out of Ran's mouth.

Ran groaned in response, but managed a weak smile.

Ken-Ken smiled sweetly and pushed his hat back into its proper place, since it had been sliding off of his head when he leaned over.

"Okies, Ran-chan! I'll go get your breakfast and then I'll go rent you a few movies," Ken said as he turned his back to Ran, then leant down to pick up a few dirty shirts. Ken stood up straight, smiled, then left the room to go fix Ran's breakfast.

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 12:00pm*~

Ken-Ken busily walked about the room, fluffing Ran's pillows, and cleaning. Ken liked taking care of Ran ^_^

"Are you feeling better, Ran-chan?" Ken asked in a sweet voice.

Ran smiled around a mouthful of chocolate ice cream and nodded. Ken returned the gesture and snaked a hand back to his rear to pull down his dress, which was hastily riding up with all of his walking.

"Ran-chan, can I take this off now? It's getting uncomfy…" Ken asked.

Ran swallowed his food noisily, and glared at poor Ken-Ken. "No."

"But Raaaan-chaaan! The dress is riding up… and the underwear you made me put on are very… restricting."

"I know."

Ken-Ken was shocked! How could Ran-chan be so mean? And Ken even used a big word! Ugh, he couldn't remember what it was at the moment, but he used it correctly! Ken blinked back tears and turned away.

"Ran," -sniff- "I'm sorry…" -sniffle- "I'll go fix you some hot cocoa!" -SOB-

And Ken ran out of the room, sobbing every step of the way. He returned moments later, hot cocoa in hand. Ken also had a rather thick book under his arm. He was scowling.

"You've been very, very mean, Ran-chan! Now, I'm going to do what my father did to me when I was bad…"

Ran blinked. "And what was that?"

"Read 'The Stand'!"

Ran gulped.

"I'm going to read it out loud… Nonstop… until I finish it."

"Ken-Ken, my turtle dove… isn't that a bit harsh??"

Ken scowled. "No."

"Can't we pick another book?"

"No."

"But I don't want to read that book…"

"Ok, fine… Don't listen. I never said you had to pay attention… but it will get to you before long."

Then the reading began…

~*Omi's POV*~

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 8:30am*~

Omi sat behind his beloved Nagi-kuns, and thoughtfully chewed the end of his pencil. Today was an awful day. He had detention… and since he'd had it before (many times), he knew what he was in for.

The last person who taught detention made the whole class hold water buckets on their shoulders and recite the Preamble. Omi knew the Preamble well. And so he was often referred to as 'Mr. Preamble'.

But, the old detention teacher had called in sick for today, and Mr. Schuldig was filling in for him. Mr. Schuldig smiled a grim smile, then stood and walked to the board, then began writing down numbers. He reminded Omi of the Cheshire cat… that grin… that horrible grin.

Well, Mr. Schuldig would go easy on them today, since there were only two students in the class. Omi and Nagi.

"Now," Mr. Schuldig began, "let's begin. Do you like to look up definitions, my little trouble makers?"

Omi and Nagi nodded.

"Good. Because, you'll be looking them up. A lot of them."

Nagi sighed unhappily.

"How many?" Omi asked, clearly upset about having to do definitions. Reciting the Preamble would've been much easier.

"Oh, about five hundred."

"Ugh…"

"I know. You think you have it bad, at least you don't have to teach all day long."

"It doesn't seem all that hard."

"Like you guys would listen to us."

Then Mr. Schuldig stopped writing the various page numbers on the board. He blinked. Omi gulped. Had he said something wrong? Oh, he hoped not.

"Uh," he stammered, "go to these pages in your Health book and look up every word that's in bold print."

Omi and Nagi groaned, and pulled out the things they'd need for writing.

"No talking, groaning, moaning, sighing, coughing, sneezing, or loud breathing… unless you want to look up a thousand," he said stiffly.

Omi stared, mouth hanging open as he fumed. This wasn't fair!

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 12:00pm*~

The room was silent. Omi slowly looked up from his paper and peeked around. Nagi was writing neatly and Mr. Schuldig was blinking repeatedly… and his eyes were snapping.

Blink. Snap!

It was very irritating. Omi looked up at the wall. Nothing but chipping paint. 'Ugh,' he thought, 'they really torture you in here… we ain't even got a clock."

Omi shook his head and went back to work. He began breathing deeply, seeing how many breaths it would take him to complete each definition. Omi's hand was hanging off of the side of his desk as he wrote; he was seeing how long it would take it to go numb… then he felt warm skin brush against his. Omi realized that it was Nagi's hand, and he smiled, then took it in his grasp. They clasped hands and continued their work, both smiling.

"No touching!" Mr. Schuldig barked.

Omi and Nagi looked up quickly, startled by the sudden outburst, and pulled their hands back onto their desks.

Mr. Schuldig gave them both a sugary smile.

'Stupid teacher…' Omi thought resentfully.

Both boys sighed, and started to write once again.

"Didn't I say no sighing?? Look up a hundred more!"

The boys gasped.

"But Mr. Schuldig!" Nagi argued. "What problem can sighing cause? It's not fair!"

"Oh, you want to go for two hundred more?"

"No, but I'm just saying it's not fair! Sighing is kind of an automatic thing… you can't give us extra work for something we can't control."

Mr. Schuldig snarled angrily. "I said a hundred! And unless you want two hundred you'll get to work!"

Omi sighed, and threw two hands up into the air. Dear God! What's with this guy?????

~*Ran's POV*~

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 8:30am*~

Ran snuffed loudly, blew his nose, and continued to watch his adorable Ken-Ken adjust his outfit. Ran had given Ken to money to buy a nurses outfit, and he'd specifically asked for the kind that came up past the upper thigh.

And it was pink. A naive color. Ran smirked happily. So now, Ken was in his tiny nurse uniform, and was taking Ran's temperature with a thermometer.

"Now, Ran-chan, are you feeling any better?" Ken asked as he pulled the thermometer out of Ran's mouth.

Ran groaned in response, but managed a weak smile. 'Dear God, I love him so much…' Ran thought.

Ken smiled sweetly and pushed his hat back into its proper place, since it had been sliding off of his head when he leaned over.

Ran was left wide-eyed, with many happy memories. 'Wow… he works out.'

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 12:00pm*~

Ran was leaning on four or five pillows, watching movies, and eating junk food. He'd have to get sick more often. Ken was happily walked about the room, cleaning and fluffing pillows.

"Are you feeling better, Ran-chan?" Ken asked in a sweet voice.

Ran smiled around a mouthful of chocolate ice cream and nodded. Ken returned the gesture, and Ran noticed he'd snuck a hand around behind his back. He hastily tugged his dress back down, and frowned.

"Ran-chan, can I take this off now? It's getting uncomfy…" Ken asked.

Ran swallowed his food noisily, and gave Ken a questioning glance. He loved that dress! How could Ken not want to wear that? Ran guessed Ken liked being such a tease… Maybe Ken was playing the naughty nurse! ^_^ Ran could play, too!

"No."

"But Raaaan-chaaan! The dress is riding up… and the underwear you made me put on are very… restricting."

"I know." 'Heh, heh, heh… then take them off.'

Ran smirked as he saw emotions play of Ken's face. Ken must be thinking of something to say back, nobody would ever guess that the cold Ran would ever play along with something like this. Then suddenly Ken turned away.

"Ran," -sniff- "I'm sorry…" -sniffle- "I'll go fix you some hot cocoa!" -SOB-

And Ken ran out of the room, sobbing every step of the way. Ran sat up in bed. What?? 'What'd I do?' he thought hastily. He was sure Ken wanted to play…

Ken returned moments later, hot cocoa in hand. He also had a rather thick book under his arm. He was giving Ran a very, VERY mean look.

"You've been very, very mean, Ran-chan! Now, I'm going to do what my father did to me when I was bad…"

Ran blinked. "And what was that?"

"Read 'The Stand'!"

Ran gulped.

"I'm going to read it out loud… Nonstop… until I finish it."

"Ken-Ken, my turtle dove… isn't that a bit harsh??"

Ken scowled. "No."

"Can't we pick another book?"

"No."

"But I don't want to read that book…"

"Ok, fine… Don't listen. I never said you had to pay attention… but it will get to you before long."

Ran worked his jaws and Ken began reading. That book was extremely thick. And Ken couldn't read all that well anyway… Ran was going to have a hard time following along.

~*Yohji's POV*~

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 8:30am*~

It was nearly graduation time. In a few months, Yohji would graduate, go off somewhere, and make a living for himself. Sigh. Yohji didn't want to grow up!

But, the school's regulations said that Yohji had to leave after he completed the 12th grade… so now, he was stuck selling Home Interior™ candles. He walked from room to room, begging people to buy some candles off of him.

And to beat all, that psycho Farfarello was with him. Farfarello was a senior as well, but Yohji had never gotten the opportunity to talk to him.

Yohji looked at the one-eyed Irishman behind him, scowled, then walked up to the next door he came to.

Knock, knock.

An old lady answered the door.

"I'm in the middle of class," she said angrily.

"So?" Yohji said while sighing. "Do you want to buy a candle? They're six bucks each… they're going towards the senior graduation. Please buy one. Please?"

The old lady took a good look at Yohji, and frowned. "I know you. I see you every day. My grandson… 'talks' about you… often. No, I will not buy a candle!"

And Yohji got a door slammed in his face. He heard Farfarello snicker, and he quickly turned.

"You think it's funny???" Yohji bit out. "I don't see you selling anything!"

Farfarello shrugged and held out his candle box. It was empty.

"I bought all of mine… it's so hard to sell candles at school."

Yohji growled. "You BOUGHT all of yours?"

Farfarello nodded, and pulled out a toothpick from a random pocket and began picking his teeth.

"Then buy mine!" Yohji said shrilly as he threw himself to Farfarello's feet. Farfarello remained silent for a moment, then smiled sadistically.

"If I buy your candles, will you give me something in return?" he questioned softly.

Yohji hesitated, then nodded.

"Good!" Farfarello exclaimed, then dragged Yohji back to his feet. "Follow me!"

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 12:00pm*~

Farfarello and Yohji had left the school building, and were driving somewhere. Yohji had no idea where, Farfarello had said it was a road trip. Yohji smiled and leant his head back against the passenger seat's headrest. He was getting to like Farfarello.

Yohji's smile left his face when his stomach began rumbling…

"Ugh, I've got the munchies," he said to himself.

Farfarello must have heard him, because the car instantly slowed, and they pulled into a McDonalds drive-through.

"What do you want?" he asked softly.

Yohji smirked. He definitely liked Farfarello.

"Don't worry!" Yohji said with a wave of his hand. Once the car had pulled up to the tiny ordering speaker type thing, he smiled, and done his best to sexily lean over Farfarello and order his food. He made sure to brush against Farfarello as much as humanly possible.

"Hello? May I take your order?"

"This is Yohji."

"Oh, hello honey! Just drive on through ok?"

With a tiny Yohji-ish smile, he hopped back into his seat. "I've been here a lot."

Farfarello raised his eyebrows. "Really now?"

They pulled up to the pick-up window, got Yohji's order, and continued on their way.

"So, where are we goin'?" Yohji said around a mouthful of Whopper™.

"Some place nice."

"Where?"

"I told you, some place nice."

"Where's 'some place nice'?"

"You'll see."

"Will I like it?"

"Most definitely."

"Good!"

And Yohji stretched, and after finishing his Whopper, took a nap. Once he woke up, he was in a very strange place.

"Where are we?" he asked groggily, sleep still clinging to him.

"We're at my house."

Yohji glanced at his watch. "Good grief, it took us…… 20 minutes to get to your house? Where do you live? The other side of the world?"

Farfarello helped Yohji out of the car, and walked into his humble home. "No, I live 30 miles from the school house. I just drive very slow."

Yohji blinked and stumbled along, until Farfarello dropped him onto a couch. "Oh," he said as he laid back and threw a hand over his face; he felt the couch bounce lightly as Farfarello sat on the opposite end of the couch. "You've got a nice place," he continued as he admired Farfarello's home from underneath his arm.

"Thank you," was the quiet reply. Then there was an odd silence.

"Why'd you bring me to your house?"

"I don't know. I felt like it."

"You're not going to rape me are you?"

"No."

"Good!" Yohji exclaimed as he sat up quickly. "So… at least I don't have to take that test in Math class, ne? I'm at your house now."

Farfarello nodded as he looked up and met Yohji's gaze.

Yohji continued to talk. "It was only a lousy ten points… missing that won't fail me."

"Yohji, assignments are ten points… tests are one hundred."

Yohji blinked, eyes suddenly alert, and… un-Yohji-like. "What? Dear Lord! I already have a low C! That'll bring me to a D!"

Farfarello nodded solemnly.

"Get your butt back in that car and drive me to school right now!!!"

"Why? You can always make it up later."

"I can?"

"Yes."

"Awesome!!!!"

~*Farfarello's POV*~

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 8:30am*~

Farfarello walked along, dragging his empty box behind him. He and Yohji were selling candles, to pay for their graduation. Yohji hadn't sold any candles as of yet, but Farf knew it was hard selling something at school, and so he'd bought all of his. He'd piled all of the candles into his locker, and kept the box… just so Yohji wouldn't feel bad.

But, Farf was finally getting to spend some time with his Yohji-kun! Grasshopper was sick today and he didn't come to school, and so Farfie didn't have much of anyone to talk to. But now… he had Yohji!

Yohji continued to walk along, grumbling and begging people to buy candles off of him. He walked up to one door, and began beating rather loudly on it.

An old lady answered the door. "I'm in the middle of class," she said angrily.

"So?" Yohji said while sighing. "Do you want to buy a candle? They're six bucks each… they're going towards the senior graduation. Please buy one. Please?"

The old lady took a good look at Yohji, and frowned. "I know you. I see you every day. My grandson… 'talks' about you… often. No, I will not buy a candle!"

And Yohji got a door slammed in his face. He heard Farf snicker, and he quickly turned.

"You think it's funny???" Yohji bit out. "I don't see you selling anything!"

Farfie shrugged and held out his empty candle box.

"I bought all of mine… it's so hard to sell candles at school."

Yohji growled. "You BOUGHT all of yours?"

Farf nodded, and pulled out a toothpick from a random pocket and began picking his teeth.

"Then buy mine!" Yohji said shrilly as he threw himself to Farf's feet. Farf reminded silent for a moment, then smiled sadistically. This was the perfect time to get Yohji alone!!!!!!!!!!!

"If I buy your candles, will you give me something in return?" he questioned softly.

Yohji hesitated, then nodded.

"Good!" Farfarello exclaimed, then dragged Yohji back to his feet. "Follow me!"

~*Friday, January 18, 2002 12:00pm*~

Farf had talked Yohji into coming with him in his car, and they were driving to a very private place. Farfie had said it was a road trip, so he wouldn't spoil the surprise. Farf saw Yohji smile and lean his head back against the passenger seat's headrest. 'Oh, how I'd love to run my fingers through those honey-colored locks' Farf thought as he threw constant peeks at Yohji.

Suddenly, Yohjo's smile left his face, and his stomach began to rumble.

"Ugh, I've got the munchies," he said softly, as if to himself.

Farfie slowed the car, and they pulled into a McDonalds drive-through. No way was he gonna let his baby go hungry!!

"What do you want?" he asked softly.

Yohji smiled thankfully.

"Don't worry!" Yohji said with a wave of his hand. Once the car had pulled up to the tiny ordering speaker type thing, he smiled, and leant over Farfarello to speak. Farf panicked.

'Oh, God, he's so close! Smells… like honey… Ooh…'

Farf smiled and started to melt into a puddle of Farfie goo.

"Hello? May I take your order?"

"This is Yohji."

"Oh, hello honey! Just drive on through ok?"

With a tiny Yohji-ish smile, he hopped back into his seat. "I've been here a lot."

Farfarello raised his eyebrows. "Really now?"

They pulled up to the pick-up window, got Yohji's order, and continued on their way.

"So, where are we goin'?" Yohji said around a mouthful of Wopper TM.

"Some place nice."

"Where?"

"I told you, some place nice."

"Where's 'some place nice'?"

"You'll see."

"Will I like it?"

"Most definitely."

"Good!"

And Yohji stretched, and after finishing his Wopper, took a nap. Farf smiled as he stole tiny glances at Yohji, all the while occasionally funning off the road. Once the car pulled into Farf's driveway, Yohji woke.

"Where are we?" he asked groggily.

"We're at my house."

Yohji glanced at his watch. "Good grief, it took us…… 20 minutes to get to your house? Where do you live? The other side of the world?"

Farfie helped Yohji out of the car, and walked into his humble home. "No, I live 30 miles from the school house. I just drive very slow."

Yohji blinked and stumbled along, until Farfarello dropped him onto a couch. "Oh," he said as he laid back and threw a hand over his face. The couch bounced lightly as Farf sat on the opposite end of the couch. "You've got a nice place," he continued as he admired Farfarello's home from underneath his arm."

"Thank you," came Farf's quiet reply. Then there was an odd silence.

"Why'd you bring me to your house?"

"I don't know. I felt like it."

"You're not going to rape me are you?"

"No."

"Good!" Yohji exclaimed as he sat up quickly. "So… at least I don't have to take that test in Math class, ne? I'm at your house now."

Farf nodded as he looked up and met Yohji's gaze.

Yohji continued to talk. "It was only a lousy ten points… missing that won't fail me."

"Yohji, assignments are ten points… tests are one hundred."

Yohji blinked, eyes suddenly alert, and… un-Yohji-like. "What? Dear Lord! I already have a low C! That'll bring me to a D!"

Farf nodded solemnly.

"Get your butt back in that car and drive me to school right now!!!"

"Why? You can always make it up later."

"I can?"

"Yes."

"Awesome!!!!"