Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ Switch ❯ Chapter 9: YOU DESTROYED MY WHAT?! SHI-NE! ( Chapter 9 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Switch

Chapter 9: YOU DESTROYED MY WHAT?! SHI-NE!

By Carter Tachikawa

Disclaimer: He he he...Oh, how I wish to own Weiß Kreuz (Ha ha, I got it right this time!). Think of the things I would do...make the series longer, for starters. Bring Ken and Yohji in the first 2 episodes of Gluhen. Give Ken more airtime and attention in the series itself. Dig deep into every Schwarz member's past. Get rid of that brown grocery bag shirt Omi wears throughout the second half of the series (no offense to anyone who likes it). And yes, there would be tons of RanKen. But, sadly, I do not own it.

Summary: I don't think I need to go through this again. Boys switch bodies, tons of confusion. Case closed.

Pairings: *a crappy sign with blinking neon red lights* RANKEN! RANKEN! RANKEN! (Cause we love seeing them together so much ^^.

BTW, thanks to ember-fang for the baby goat's name (Yes, I realized you were talking about the goat). I've finally decided on them (provided I can tell the sex by then):

If it's a boy- Ren (Ran + Ken)
If it's a girl- Kya (Ken + Aya)

I should know when I go visit them in the summer. Hopefully, Ren/Kya will be born by then and I'll tell you all about it in a new Weiß Kreuz fic. And the baby should be born soon cause Ken is FAT!

Ken (begins pinching his stomach): I'm not fat! (Clings to Aya) Carter said I was fat, love!

Aya (death glares): Is that so? (jumps gazillion feet into the air and aims katana at Carter): Shi-ne!

Carter (backs away): No, no, no! I meant Ken the *goat* was fat cause she's pregnant, not your Ken!

Aya (looks blankly): Oh.

Carter: I better stop this now. Okay, here we go for a recap. Schwarz has finally made an appearance after eight freaking chapters! There maybe a slight Brad x Schu but nothing to drive anyone away, I hope. The real Omi is out for the real Yohji's blood. Sakura can actually notice something's wrong (AMAZING!). Yohji still has to take Omi's exam and Schu was bored until Brad got a premonition. But Brad hasn't told anyone the premonition because he's afraid (Yes, old stick up the ass is afraid!) So now we start with 'Aya' (Ken) and 'Yohji' (Aya) on a date with one another^^ (kind of). The Schwarz may be in the next chapter. And I FINALLY got to see the Gluhen opening and ending. Here's what I have to say: screw what the guys look like! I can't wait to see an episode. Speaking of which, does anyone know where I can find episode 1 & 2 of Gluhen? Let me know if you do!

Ahem, thanks to my readers. What can I say, I love you! I don't know you and I love you!. Here we go: kamibukurosama (109 mp3s is 100 more than what I have, my dear. Any Gluhen music in that collection?), ember-fang (thanks for the name!), Ayako (I will never forget the "genki darts of doom"!), fei (still awaiting the next chapter of "White"), lise (yes, Schuldig will be screwed big time), Keeshe Kaldaka (Duo Maxwell Aya looks awesome in his eyecatch! That feminine lavender shirt he wears, on the other hand...), Cherub Katan (my first reviewer when FFN came back up after being a *** to me!), Neptican (my 100th reviewer!) some reader I cannot remember the name of (gomen, I hope you read the rest of the story soon to get the answer to your question), Ryia Jen Rowen (it's been a while since I heard from you), and White Rose (still waiting to see next part of your neko Weiß fic). Also, lady flame (Love the Schwarz idea!) and Kitty Kat (oh, God, those outtakes...sometimes they're lame as hell but sometimes they are so funny. Like what Ken yells to Shoen during their fight. "WHIP IT GOOD, BABY!" That had me in stitches!) on mediaminer.org.

Also, two more concerns to address. (I swear, I'll get to the fic soon!) First, Sakura noticing the changes. Well, when you think about it, would anyone expect Ken...dear sweet Ken...to be chasing Omi? I'm sure even Tot of Schrient would see something weird with the picture...uh, scratch that! It's a bad example! Look, the point is, Sakura has every right to be suspicious. If I were her, regardless how dumb I may be, I would notice a few changes myself.

Second concern, is whether or not I will do a Schwarz version. I've actually given two other people permission to do a Schwarz switch fic so if you see one of those, it won't be from me. However, if they forget about it, maybe I'll write the sequel to "Switch" starring them. But it won't be out for awhile.

Now we can begin the fic...

* * *

The rain was still pouring but not as hard when 'Omi' was finally forced to go to school. 'Ken' didn't kill him though. Instead he sent the poor boy (former man) off to school with a few harsh words and sharp nails pinching into his skin again. 'Omi' had a feeling that the real Ken didn't cut his nails very often because now they were sharper than ever. Perhaps they grew overnight or something. Nevertheless, he dragged himself to school with very little enthusiasm. He decided not to tell 'Ken' about the other girls he made dates with.

"Have a good day at school!" 'Ken' told 'Omi' as he walked out the door. Then he smiled wickedly. "And if you fail that exam..."

"Bite me!" 'Omi' snapped before slamming the door to the flower shop. 'Ken' sighed and smiled. It was good to tease 'Omi' like that. He finally could get back at all the times 'Omi' made fun of him. Thank goodness the real Ken did *not* cut his nails on a regular basis. They were becoming useful weapons now. It would be one of the few things he would miss when he switched back to normal. No, *if* he switched back to normal. As fun as it was being 'Ken', he *did* miss being Omi.

Everyone watched as 'Omi' headed off towards school in the disgusting weather. 'Ken' had gone upstairs to putter around in his room to get ready. His shift would start soon while the other two took a break. All the schoolgirls were gone as was Sakura, still somewhat in the dark about what happened. So 'Aya' and 'Yohji' had time to spend alone and once again, 'Aya' lost the bet.

"You're just too good, koi." He sighed. "Where do you want to go?"

"Nowhere." 'Yohji' said looking at the gray mess outside. "And I didn't win completely. Omi harmed Yohji so you get to choose what we should do while we're alone."

That made 'Aya' very happy. He got out of his chair, knocking it down in the process. "Oh, I know what I want to do! You can wait in my bedroom, koi. I'm going to find the tapes."

'Yohji' glared at him. "We are *not* going to watch "The Big Green" and that soccer match again, are we?"

"Hey, you said we get to do what *I* want to do!" 'Aya' pouted.

'Yohji' regretted his decision. With a sigh, he got up and gave in. "Fine. Bring the tapes and bring me some chocolate ice cream. I'll wait for you. "

"Yay!" 'Aya' skipped off happily to get his favorite movie and favorite soccer match that he had taped two years before. He also got two bowls of ice cream, chocolate for 'Yohji' and strawberry for himself [1]. Poor 'Yohji' had to endure this for a couple of hours but he promised to try and enjoy this moment with his Ken (or himself, depending on how anyone saw it). Minutes later, they were both sitting in the real Ken's bedroom, watching the soccer match first. It was 'Yohji's' third time seeing it (at this point, he wanted someone to shove his own katana into his gut) and 'Aya's' 2357th time watching it. He kept bouncing up and down, making 'Yohji' fear that the strawberry ice cream his lover was eating would soon fly out of the bowl and land on 'Aya's' orange sweater. He sat quietly on the floor, eating his own chocolate ice cream, not really caring who the hell was winning. He already knew and that's the reason he wasn't getting excited. 'Aya', on the other hand,...

"C'mon! C'mon! Kick it in the goal! Kick it in the goal!" 'Aya' whispered, shoving his spoon into his mouth. Then his violet eyes widened. "Oh, that's cold ice cream!"

"That's why it's called *ice* cream." 'Yohji' sighed, watching as the players scamper on the TV and then finally someone kicked the ball into the goal. There were screams from the TV and screams from 'Aya' who did the worst thing possible now. As he was dancing in joy, the strawberry ice cream *did* spill out and landed on the orange sweater! 'Yohji' saw that and sent a death glare in 'Aya's' direction. 'Aya' was too busy dancing to care about the blotch on his sweater. His team was winning after all!

"Yeah, two to one! We're now winning, two to one!" He whooped, dropping more ice cream onto his jeans. 'Yohji' bristled once again. Why, oh why, was his lover a messy eater?

"C'mon, love! Dance with me!" Before 'Yohji' could protest, 'Aya' pulled him off the floor and swung him around. All 'Yohji' could pay attention to were the splotches on his favorite orange sweater and jeans. Oh, 'Aya' was going to pay for that! How dare he do that to his favorite sweater! 'Yohji' pulled away in fury and sat down on the bed. He scooped up the remote and paused the game. Poor 'Aya' was disappointed.

"You are no fun sometimes." He complained, pinching 'Yohji's' scowling face and squishing his face together. "C'mon, koi. Turn your frown upside down."

"Do you *want* me to stab you?" 'Yohji' snapped.

"Well, technically, it should be 'strangle' cause you are..."

"I know whose body I'm in!" 'Yohji' exploded. 'Aya' backed away slowly, letting go of his lover (technically Yohji's) face. 'Yohji's' face was turning red from all that anger that had been bottled up from the past few days, thanks to his lover scratching up his car and now destroying his sweater. 'Aya' picked up his bowl and began to eat, 'Yohji' never taking his now jade eyes off him. His lover started watching that silly game and getting upset when the other team also scored a goal. He watched again in horror as 'Aya' dribbled more strawberry ice cream down that sweater.

"Will you eat like a normal person for a change?!" He demanded, his patience growing thin.

'Aya' looked at him, taking the spoon out of his mouth. "What's wrong, koi?"

"Look." 'Yohji' pointed to the splotches on the orange sweater. Strawberry ice cream left a strange colored stain on it. "You ruined my favorite turtleneck." He continued in a dangerously quiet voice.

"Oh, sorry. Although, I must admit, the stains actually make the sweater look better." 'Aya' said, checking out the messy sweater. 'Yohji' fumed when he heard that comment. Why did 'Aya' insist on testing his patience today?

"Are you saying that my sweater is ugly?"

"No! I'm just saying it...ah, forget it! I guess I should take it off, huh?" 'Aya' began peeling the dirty sweater off to reveal a nicely toned, pale white chest underneath. He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and almost fainted. 'Aya' was so beautiful! Oh, he knew that already. But that chest, that well-toned abdomen, his strong arms...so fine and sturdy. He began running his hands across his body, feeling every curve and cupping some of the warm flesh that was part of 'Aya's' stomach. Even it was sturdy and hard despite all the chocolate he ate. His white skin was smooth without a rash or pimples to ruin it. When they were still in their old bodies, 'Aya' always nuzzled up against his lovers chest and always tried comparing it something poetic, even though he wasn't a poetic person. Now he was feeling poetic again, looking at that milky-white skin and strong frame. Oh, a sculptor would have a field day if he ever decided to make a statue of Aya Fujimiya. His violet eyes were soft with a flash of astonishment in them, adding the perfect touch to the redhead's reflection in the mirror.

Meanwhile, 'Yohji' was trying hard to keep himself from asking 'Aya' to take off his pants. Even though he was looking at himself, it was still tempting. Was this what his lover saw every night? Lucky him. Before 'Yohji' could control himself, he saw that 'Aya' had noticed the stain on his jeans and also began to take them off. Soon his lover was wearing nothing but plaid boxers. 'Yohji' didn't even know he had these boxers to begin with.

"So what do I do with the dirty clothes?" 'Aya' asked, holding up the orange sweater and jeans. 'Yohji' didn't answer because he was too busy admiring 'Aya'...or himself.

"Koi?"

"Yes?" 'Yohji' asked in semi-dreamy voice, too busy looking at 'Aya's' (his own) chest.

"What do I do with the dirty clothes?"

"Throw 'em away." 'Yohji' was starting to act like the real Yohji, which scared 'Aya'.

"Huh? But this is your favorite sweater!"

"Wha...oh yes! Oh yes!" 'Yohji' snapped back into reality. He glared at his half-naked lover. He grabbed that sweater and inspected the stains on it. Oh good, they could be washed out. Still he was furious to see such a beautiful piece of clothing ruined by sloppy eating habits. 'Aya' knew his lover was mad so he turned bright red.

"You will pay for this along with the car." 'Yohji' whispered. Unfortunately, it wasn't one of those sweet, gentle whispers he used whenever he and 'Aya' were together. It was a quiet angry one. That whisper meant that 'Aya' was very lucky to still be standing because on regular circumstances, he would be dead by 'Yohji's' hand.

"I know, I know." 'Aya' groaned. "It's stupid Yohji's fault! If he didn't try to make me drive..."

'Yohji's' ears perked up. "Wait! *Yohji* told you to drive my Porsche?!"

"Um...yeah. He was the one who suggested taking it out in the first place." 'Aya' realized he was getting 'Omi' in trouble cause now 'Yohji' sat back and looked grim, clasping his hands and pressing his fingers against his knuckles until they turned white.

"Well", He began, "this changes the whole perspective of the situation, doesn't it?"

"Wha...what are you going to do?"

'Yohji' smiled wickedly. "I'm not going to say."

'Aya' smiled back with relief. "Does that mean I'm off the hook?"

"No." 'Yohji's' face went back to being pissed off again. "You *did* scratch the car. And you still have to pay for ruining my sweater, which you will do now. I want it washed and the stain must *not* be visible! It should look as good as new. Run it through the machine as many times as you have to but I want that stain OUT."

With the emphasis on 'out', it was clear what 'Aya' had to do. So the punishment of the ruined sweater wasn't that bad. Of course, it may have been just the beginning of a series of bad things to happen. Figuring that he shouldn't try to complain about it, 'Aya' pushed the dirty clothes to the side.

"I'll clean them after the game." He insisted. 'Yohji' was about to yell at him but then he remembered 'Aya' wearing nothing but those plaid boxers. Oh, what the hell! The sweater could wait. It was much more fun watching 'Aya' bounce around half-naked. So 'Yohji' watched the rest of the game in silence, licking his ice cream spoon clean, and trying hard not to drool at the site of his half-naked lover (technically himself) going crazy over a soccer game.

This was the problem with being in Yohji's body. Everything, including his own body, was irresistible.

* * *

"You'll take me out later like you promised, Tsukiyono-san?" One girl that 'Omi' had met yesterday asked. For a moment, he couldn't remember her but then he did and he nodded. He wasn't one to disappoint a lady, especially if she was younger than eighteen. He winked at her.

"You bet, baby." He threw in a charming smile. The girl was slightly confused but nodded and went back to join her friends who were talking in the back. Meanwhile, 'Omi' went back to cramming for this exam. Stupid little chibi! Why didn't he mention this exam earlier? He didn't want to fail cause that would put the real Omi's grades in jeopardy. Plus his teacher would realize something was wrong if 'Omi Tsukiyono' failed this exam. They already gave him weird looks 'Omi' apparently lost himself in the hallways. He didn't the real Omi's schedule and as a result, was wandering around a lot. Luckily, he found a couple of friends that Omi had in more than one class. They helped him out even though they wondered how he could forget where his classes were.

Somehow, through the confusion and insanity, 'Omi' made it to the right classes. Now the moment had come for him to take that so-called exam. Everyone quickly fell quiet and got seated as the teacher made his way into the room. 'Omi' said a little prayer (something he was doing a lot these days) as the teacher began talking.

"Make sure your answers are clear and logical." He said as the test was being passed around. "I want to see how you came to that answer, not just the answer itself. You may begin whenever you get your exam."

'Omi' got his exam and almost died right there. There were about twenty questions on that page. He knew nothing! How was he supposed to give a clear and logical answer when he didn't even know what the question was asking? Were all of the exams like this? For a moment, 'Omi' thought about looking at the other kid's paper and copying. But that was plain wrong. The real Omi would then dig those nails deep into his flesh *and* draw blood. So 'Omi' did the best thing he could and began to bias all his answers.

He had only come to the fifth question when more than half the students turned in their papers. He wondered how they could all finish their paragraphs so quickly. But, then again, good students took time to look over their stuff. Besides, the teacher wanted logical and clear answers. And, even though 'Omi' didn't know what he was talking about, it sounded more or less clear.

He was on the tenth question when a few more students finished. How did they all finish so quickly? Oh well. He would take time. It wouldn't hurt being last.

The second-to-last student finished his exam while 'Omi' was still on the fourteenth question. The students at that point noticed how long 'Tsukiyono-kun' was taking to write his exam. 'Omi' ignored them and went on.

"Has everyone finished?" The teacher asked.

"No, I'm still working, sensei." 'Yohji' remembered to add the 'sensei' in, knowing that's what the real Omi would say.

The teacher raised an eyebrow as a couple of girls giggled in the back. "Honestly, Tsukiyono-kun, how long does it take to complete a math exam?"

Math exam? 'Omi' flipped through the pages of the exam to find out that all his questions were indeed math questions! Here he was, writing essays for a math exam! He should have read the questions a little better.

*Aw, damn! The chibi's gonna have my ass on a plate!* 'Omi' realized. He figured he should try to solve the math problems. There were only six more to go anyway. No wonder the teacher said to show all work.

'Omi' finished right on time, making up answers for the last six problems. He handed in the exam, his face flushed with embarrassment.

"Ah, thank you, Tsukiyono-kun." The teacher said, taking the exam. "I hope you didn't try solving all the problems."

"Huh?"

"You did remember to omit three questions, didn't you?"

*Now he tells me.* 'Omi' felt a headache coming on. He suddenly remembered why he hated school in the past. Hopefully, he wouldn't have to endure this any longer.

* * *

"Aya-kun? Ken-kun? I need to…ah!" 'Ken' opened the door to find a half-naked 'Aya' cuddled up next to a fully clothed 'Yohji', watching "The Big Green". The site of seeing them together didn't shock him but he felt bad on interrupting them in the first place. He immediately closed the door. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't know you…"

"What do you need, Omi?" 'Aya' asked from behind the closed door.

'Ken' took a deep breath and forced the image of 'Aya' in his boxers out of his head. "I just wanted to know if I have to play with the spawn of the devil again."

"The who?"

"You know", 'Ken' made a face, "those children you play with."

"Omittichi, why are you calling them 'spawn of the devil'? Only earlier, you were complaining about Yohji calling your darts 'the genki darts of doom'."

"That was different! Those kids really are spawn of the devil!"

"Well, if it's still raining, cancel the lesson. If not and the ground is dry, you're going out there, whether you like it or not!"

"No, Ken-kun! Anything but that!"

"Sorry, Omi."

"I hate you." 'Ken' muttered, turning away. He hoped that Kritiker would have an answer to switching them back soon. He never wanted to play with those children again and the sooner he got back into his body, the better he would feel.

* * *

"I'm dead." 'Omi' moaned, as he sat in the only dry park bench. He should have gone home but now he wanted time for himself. The day took a turn for the worse when he sat on a wet bench, soaking his ass up. He had to wrap 'Omi's' jacket around his waist so the ladies wouldn't make fun of him. By now, the rain had stopped so more people were out. 'Omi' watched two little kids playing in the sand. One of them was throwing stuff into the other one's hair. Off to the side, there was a couple walking hand in hand. Then to the left, several little kids were trying to fly a badly made kite. And right across from 'Omi' was a woman, well over eighteen and very beautiful, sitting on a bench and reading a book. More than anything, he wanted go over there and win her over with his good old Kudou charm. Then he remembered he was Omi Tsukiyono, not Yohji Kudou. And he was in enough trouble already. Smoking in Aya's car, driving Aya's car without telling him, picking up too many underage girls, most likely failing Omi's exam, making Omi look a like a fool in front of his classmates, etc. It was probably best to leave this woman alone. Besides, he needed to think about how to explain the bad grade, when it came, to the real Omi.

"I'm dead. I'm so dead." He murmured. "He's going to kill me."

"Aw, the kitten's upset that everyone's going to kill him? Well, I'll do them a favor. I'll relieve them of that job."

'Omi' turned around, recognizing that voice at once. He now wished he had some genki darts of doom to save his ass cause the next few moments would be pure hell. He didn't have to be intelligent to know who was talking to him.

"Get lost!" He snarled, making sure no one else heard him. There was no need to bring these other people into this mess.

"I can't, kitten. You're sitting there, all pretty and innocent. I'm bored and I need to bother someone. So I choose to bother you!"

'Omi's' face darkened as the grinning Schwarz telepath Schuldig stepped out of his hiding place.

TBC... (Ah, I love leaving you all at cliffhangers!)

* * *

[1] Oh, fei, I hope you don't mind! I loved your story "Strawberry and Chocolate" (or was it "Chocolate and Strawberry"? I can't remember the title-_-0) and I *slightly* incorporated the chocolate and strawberry ice cream deal in here. I really hope you don't mind.

(Ah, I know Schuldig has not manipulated 'Omi' yet. He just stepped out of the shadows and I promise you, 'Omi's' not going to make anything easy for him. The big Weiß/Schwarz battle is going to come soon. More than likely, it'll be the next chapter. I'm sorry there was not much 'Ken' (Omi) in this one. I'll make up for that. Is Yohji still doomed? (Duh) Will Aya ever realize that his orange sweater is a fashion no-no? (Well, I kind of like that sweater cause I have one like it...) Will Ken figure out that there are other things to life than soccer and Aya? (Probably not) And will they have another mission? (Oh yeah. Oh yeah) Find out in chapter 10!

I must say now, I like the glasses Ken wears now in Gluhen (which replaced the goggles). Yeah, I'm dying to watch it. Though I'll never write the boys as Gluhen characters, I still want to cut that piece of hair out of Omi's face, I want Yohji with long hair again, and I still hate Ken's pants, I'm dying to watch it.

Schu: And that ending theme...that was something! Brad was crying on me cause he was nostalgic!

Brad: I was *not* crying!

Schu: Oh, really? Your glasses misted over cause you were crying so hard. And then you leaned on me, going "Oh Schuldig! That was so touching!" and you left this wet spot on my jacket! I can't tell whether it's tears or drool!

Brad: I don't cry and I don't drool!

Schu (mimics Brad): Schuldig, that is the most beautiful thing I ever saw! Oh no, I'm drooling! Forgive me, Schu. Everything's just so touching!

Me: I better close this now. Sorry I took forever to update. I had guests coming over this weekend and FFN went down for sometime (grrr) so this got pushed back a little. Well, here it is! More Schwarz on the way! And I know, you all wanted a smutty RanKen scene, but this story ain't PG for nothing. I promise when the sequel to "WSIR" comes out, there will be plenty of smut for you to enjoy. For now, review! Keep me inspired and confused, people! No flames, thank you. But do be kind to press that review button and leave me a line. Later! Ja ne!