Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ This is Not My Life ❯ And then everyone was dead ( Chapter 1 )

Standard disclaimer: Weiß ain't mine. But I do own a whole bunch of rocks. Really lovely rocks. In fact, I have so many nice rocks that I'll give you some for free! Just send me a modest fee of ¥50,000 to cover shipping and handling. I accept money orders and paypal.

-----THIS IS NOT MY LIFE-----

"And Then Everyone Was Dead"

-AYA-


I've caught myself falling into a reoccurring daydream lately. It's pretty stupid actually…but I wish it were true.

I find myself wondering if…if maybe Aya isn't the one in the coma. Maybe it was actually me who got hit by the car.

Maybe I'm the one in the coma, and all this Weiß shit is just some twisted dream I'm having while lying there unconscious. God, that would be great, huh?
I'd happily stay in this nightmare forever, if it meant that Aya was happy and well.

But even then, maybe she wouldn't be.
I mean, look at what happened to me.
Would I someday wake up only to find Aya all bitter and jaded?
We were so much alike, after all.
That would be awful. I'd rather have her unconscious and without worry than like I am now.

But that's irrelevant. It's just a stupid dream after all.
I know it can't be real. You can't feel this kind of pain in dreams. Or are coma dreams different? If you're asleep for that long…maybe your dreams evolve. They could get progressively more realistic until you can no longer distinguish them from real life.

I bet Omi could find out about that. But I won't ask him. They'd think I was crazy.
Not that I'm not. Quite frankly, I'm way past crazy. But they don't need to know that. No reason for me to shatter their little false perception of what a stoic fearless person I am. It's easy to confuse fearlessness and insanity.

Well, anyway….

I wonder if Aya dreams?
I hope so. I know they would be pleasant. She has so many nice memories to dream about.

Maybe she's dreaming about the time our parents took us to Okinawa. Aya was so excited about that trip. It was the first time our parents could afford a big family vacation. She bought a new sundress and couldn't stop giggling about all the cute boys she'd meet on the beach. I have to admit I was a bit jealous over that. I didn't want Aya to meet cute boys and potentially get a boyfriend. If Aya got a boyfriend she'd have less time for me. I didn't want to be left alone.

I didn't exactly have a lot of friends back then…or ever, actually. I'm not an outgoing person. Aya and I did everything together, so I never made the effort to make other friends. I didn't feel a need to. Besides. The other boys my age thought I was weird for spending so much time with a girl. Sister or not.

They didn't understand at all.

They didn't know what it was like to have someone who matched your personality so perfectly. Who laughed at the same jokes, read the same books, listened to the same music, had all the same favorite things…. It was a tad eerie, actually. We should have been twins.

We lived in a small house and had to share a room. That probably forced us to get along. We shared everything…not that we had a ton of stuff to share. We had a few toys…but what we mostly owned were books.

Aya loved books.

And I loved reading them to her.

I think my favorite memory is reading her 'Grimm's Fairy Tales.' It had a lot of gruesome bits, and she'd always pretend to get really scared. I knew she was just pretending though. It was actually pretty hard to scare Aya.

She'd laugh a lot too. There were lots of stories about talking sewing needles and lumps of coal. And almost every tale had a character named Hans. Aya thought this was funny, and one day she announced that she was going to marry a man named Hans. I agreed with that wholeheartedly. I mean, what were the chances that she'd find a Hans in Japan? It of course never occurred to me that she might have intended to leave the country.

Now she may never even leave the hospital.

It's not fair. She didn't deserve this.

According to the fairy tales, I should be the one asleep.
It's always the brother who gets in trouble; always the sister who saves him.
Always.
Why was it different for us?
Life got it wrong.
Or maybe I'm the one who got it wrong.

I think I've become a bit unhinged actually. No. Make that definitely.
I completely lost touch with reality. A long time ago.
I started to take those stories too seriously. They worked their way into my perception of real life.

You think I'm joking, don't you? I'm not. This is how bad it got; my train of logic went like this:

Aya wasn't in a coma. She was enchanted.

To break the spell, I had to kill the one who cast it.

Takatori.

Takatori was my very own evil stepmother/ wicked sorcerer/ greedy king/ all-around-purpose bad guy.

All I had to do was kill him. If I killed him his magic would vanish. Aya would wake up. Just like that story where the girl's brother drank from an enchanted spring and turned into a deer. As soon as the stepmother died, he turned back. He was ok. Simple, really.

So I fixated on this.

It wasn't just revenge. It was a quest.

Because the sister always saves her brother in the stories. It was time for me to return the favor.

Because I couldn't just sit back and wait. I needed to do something. Anything to save her.

I became obsessed.

Kill Takatori. Save Aya.
Kill Takatori. Save Aya.

I did it. I killed Takatori.

Aya didn't wake up.

I should have known better than to really expect anything to change by killing him. I was perfectly aware of how skewed my logic was. But that's the thing with obsessions. They're rarely logical.

I guess there was a slight relief knowing that he couldn't hurt anyone else now, but it didn't help in dealing with Aya. Seeing her asleep hurt just as much as before. Maybe more even, because now I felt helpless. There didn't seem to be anything left I could do for her.

Well, there was still one thing.

Just as crazy as before, but at least it was something.

There were two kinds of enchantment stories in that book, after all.
The first, as I mentioned before, requires killing the spell-caster in order to undo the magic. Which didn't work.

The second is harder. It involves a time limit, usually a long one. After all, the prince who finally saved sleeping beauty only succeeded because the hundred years were up. Her other would-be rescuers bleed to death in the thorns because they came too soon. The stories I had in mind were more of those brother/sister ones (there never seemed to be a shortage of them). Typically, they went like this: The brother(s) turned into some type of woodland animal-most popularly a bird-and the sister would live with him alone in the forest and take care of him while they tried to break the enchantment. Which almost always involved a seven-year vow of silence. There was also always a king who happened through the forest and fell deeply in love with the maiden (now I always objected to this detail, because due to the fact the sister could not talk, it meant the King was really in love with her looks.) Even though the sister would marry the king, she always refused to forsake her brother. Jealous people would accuse her of crimes but she would not speak up to defend herself. Her own life was less important than restoring her brother to normal. Yeah, I really liked the fact that she was more loyal to her brother than her husband.

So maybe I can still save her. Even if it's just by waiting.

I'm already as close to a vow of silence as I can get and still function in Weiß. After the accident, I completely withdrew and shut myself off from everything. It wasn't intentional, but I think that somewhere deep down, I was hoping it would help.

My vow-for Aya.

So now do you believe I'm frickin' nuts?

Oh well. At least it gives me something to live for.

And I'll wait.
A year, seven, a hundred if I have to.
Silently and alone.

It's so stupid. Who am I kidding? Everything I've fixated on is stupid.

I'm just setting myself for up disappointment. It's dangerous for me to try to live in a fairy tale.

Not nearly enough of them have happy endings, you know. That whole 'happily ever after' line is bullshit; it's the edited sugar-coated version.

More often the last sentence reads:

"And then everyone was dead."

 

 

 

 

 

A/N: For those who are interested, The title of this fic is taken from a Fastball song which reminds me of Aya. Many of the chapter titles are also Fastball songs, which remind me of the narrating character or the situation in said chapter. It's not in the least important that you know any of the songs, I just felt like acknowledging that. The title of this chapter was taken from Grimm's fairy tales, the story in particular `Death of the Hen.' Other notes of interest will be credited in their respective chapters.