Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ To Those About To Die ❯ Chapter 4- Toni ( Chapter 4 )

Author's Note:

This chapter contains graphic shounen-ai material necessary to the story, raising it to an "R" rating. Please, read on...

Chapter Four -- Toni

His eyes had betrayed his joy at finding me alive, as had mine in seeing him again.

We were to move into an apartment, the four of us, and begin training as a team under the new terms set forth by the student rulers of Rosenkreuz. Those young despots were more reasonable and yet more strict than the old regime. They insisted that every capable operative make ready to hunt down the four renegades, and train for that purpose alone. Their rabid single-mindedness amused me, until I gave it some thought and realized that, if we could take out Schwarz, we could take on the world. They were grooming us as an elite strike force for conquest. And they would tolerate no distractions.

Still, the heart cannot so easily be chained. While the intention was to prepare a small army of cold-blooded killers and scatter them to pivotal locations throughout the world, some of those killers were training themselves to become human beings. I thought of my gentle friend Karl; his other friend, his red-haired confidant, had had the strength to do the impossible. Was there some critical connection between the two? If there were, it would not be for any reason of which Rosenkreuz would approve.

And suddenly, to me, the approval of Rosenkreuz did not seem so terribly important anymore. At some point in time I had become a man, and my will was still my own.

Understand, humanity is not encouraged at Rosenkreuz: feelings and desires are manipulated so thoroughly there that one can never be certain that those feelings are in fact one's own. This produces a certain fragility of mind, a willingness to either be led by the strong or to impose one's will upon the weak. Somehow I had not become so fragile.

If I were still at Rosenkreuz, I am certain they would have worked harder to break me.

But I was no longer at Rosenkreuz. My team was housed off-premises now, under the distracted eye of Esset. I could almost taste freedom, and it was intoxicating.

And the embodiment of that freedom was Toni. Darkly handsome Toni, with his brilliant and honest grin. Though he never spoke of his past, I believe he was French. It didn't matter. Nor did it matter that I towered over him; I towered over many people. He became the focus of my life, a most singular and exhilirating obsession.

I cast aside the shackles on my heart and allowed myself desire. But how to proceed? I knew little of my own expectations, and had no idea whether he returned my interest. The tension enflamed me; I feared I would go mad with the waiting.

Fate would not allow me to suffer long. One day it happened. He kissed me. Just so, sucking at my lower lip a little to the left of center. I felt all breath leak out of me. His eyes locked on mine, and then he took me by the hand and led me to his room.

Our two teammates were out, supposedly getting to know the area. They were due back in an hour. Time enough.

Just eighteen years of age and still fundamentally a virgin, I allowed him to take the lead. His hands and mouth brought me to life with a surge of desire almost electric in its intensity. My clothes fell where he flung them. We stood there a moment, nude as David, and stared at one another with unconcealed hunger.

Toni guided me to lie beside him on the narrow bed, and I complied. My belly felt tense and queasy with excitement. I wasn't sure how this would play out, but I wanted whatever he had in mind to give me.

He lay on his left side, his head pillowed on his arm. His right hand explored my face, my neck, my chest. His breath puffed softly against my closed eyelids; he was nearly panting, and so was I. As his hand trailed downward, I moaned in anticipation. I had been touched before, but never by someone I wanted as much as Toni.

When his fingers curled slowly around my erection, my hips bucked upward and I cried out. I could sense he was smiling. He gripped me firmly, tugging as he stroked. His hand was warm, not soft, and strong. I must have been projecting because I heard him whimper as he speeded up a little. But only a little; then he slowed his hand again, and I was the one whimpering.

I came too fast, crying out and clinging to his arm for support. I was so excited that I remained hard within his fist. He gave an approving squeeze, then moved to grasp my shoulder. He pulled me toward him, and I understood what he wanted. I stared into his eyes. They were dilated and hot; his thoughts were loud.

He guided me to mount him, and heaven exploded around me. My gift of empathy joined our minds even as sex joined our bodies. I groaned as I thrust into him, felt his ecstasy, felt the thick heat of flesh penetrating, pressing... I thought I would faint, the sensations were so powerful.

Toni lifted his legs and pulled me closer. I trembled violently and thrust like a beast, harder and deeper, feeling every thrust as both given and received. Sweat dripped from my face to shatter upon his chest.

I felt his body tighten beneath mine, and my climax hit moments before his. In those seconds, my world collapsed inward to include only the two of us; even the bed was not real for me. His soul resonated with mine. Tears fell with sweat.

After that day we were inseparable. Most times he would pull me atop him, but sometimes he took me instead. Those times were more gentle and focused, without the maddening sensation echo that my mounting him always brought. The feel of myself around his cock was muffled by the feel of my cock against his belly, so I could stay in the moment a little more clearly.

Our teammates quickly figured out we were having an affair. The pyrokinetic, Geisel (who preferred to go by "Kiko" though I don't know why), seemed to think it was cool.

The telepath, Roderik, seemed to find it distasteful, though I knew he and Kiko were doing more than reconnaissance together. Neither spoke of it directly, but Kiko sometimes flashed me a "thumbs up" gesture as I slipped into Toni's room.

In those months, I felt truly free.

We had moved to Berlin, to carry out surveillance on a former Esset enclave that was now of dubious loyalty. It was November, almost my birthday. I would soon be nineteen.

Returning from a solo jaunt, I entered the common room of our apartment and froze.

Toni. Face down.

Blood.

Roderik.

Gun.

"He was weak," Roderik informed me, voice dripping with contempt. "Not leader material. You answer to me now."

Roderik ordered Kiko to dispose of the body. The young pyrokinetic avoided my gaze.

I covered my mirror, avoiding my gaze as well.

When I closed my eyes, I could feel his mouth upon mine, sucking a little at the lower lip, right there, just to the left of center.

I drew a deep breath and cleansed my thoughts. Roderik was a telepath, and he would be watching me closely. I would not follow Toni to the grave, though my heart screamed to do only that. He deserved better.

He deserved vengeance.